Insomnia
by ShadowBloodNinja
Summary: After the accident I was told to watch for side affects. Now instead of my insomnia I am brought to another world when I sleep! This world is a great place but is filled with dangerous ninja that all seem to want to get me! While here I make friends, fall in love, and find a place I belong. When the time comes to choose here or Earth, where will I stay?
1. How it all began

**Authors Note:**

_**First story i'm uploading and I barely figured out how to put a story on so say good luck to me on trying to figure out how i'm going to upload more chapters. If you could tell me i'd really appreciate it. I'd also appreciate reviews. But seriously, how do I add more chapters?**_

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**Summary**- _In the car accident my head was hit and I was told to look out for some weird signs. Now instead of my insomnia, I am sent to another world when i sleep. This world is filled with dangerous ninja and people who want to kill me! While here I make bonds and even fall in love! When night falls they don't know I leave this world though and go back to my crappy old life of abuse. When the time omes will i choose Earth, or the world of Naruto?_

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Chapter 1- How it all began

My eye twitched as I watched what was happening in front of me, my two idiotic brothers were splayed on the floor with flour around them. Both had looks of surprise that would make someone who had a full night of sleep and not good control of their emotions burst out laughing. The problem with me was that I did have control of my emotions and I never sleep well. I also never laughed or smiled, I was usually very depressing. My brothers then noticed my appearance in the kitchen.

"Oh hey Tami!" said Jack. Jack was 19 with that personality that made you either want to slap him, and if not love him. He was also pretty handsome with shaggy black hair and pale blue-grey eyes that shined with playfulness.

"Morning Tami." said Chris who Jack was perched on, this was going to be a good story. Chris was another interesting boy. he was also 19 and was Jack's twin, he had dark brown eyes that showed curiosity and brown hair that was more wavy than curly like Jack's, both took after both parents. My dad had brown hair and blue eyes while our mother had black hair and brown eyes.

"What were you two doing with flour at 7 in the morning?" I asked, my voice wasn't too bad. It was somewhere between perfect and deep, it was good for singing. There were few things I liked; the list was Anime, art, working out, gymnastics, music, and weapons. That was about it though, not much of a people person. Jack scratched his head and Chris chuckled nervously, they only did this when they knew I was going to knock them upside the head for stupidity.

"Well you see." started Chris when Jack cut him off.

"Don't blame us! Blame, uh… the dog!" said Jack looking around wildly for a dog. We didn't have a dog. I sighed and put my hands up in mock surrender.

"Fine, explain this to mom when she comes down and good luck with dad. Though knowing him, I'm the one getting the beating. In other words I surrender to the stupidity you two emanate" I said turning around leaving to go back to my room.

I liked our house, it had 3 bedrooms on the main level then an attic bedroom that I had. I pulled down the stairs that led up to my room and climbed them quickly before slamming it shut and looking around my room. It was a depressing room filled with dark colors, but then over by my computer desk was a wall filled with Naruto characters I had drawn, gotten from magazines, or had printed from the computer.

I walked over to my mirror and glared at my reflection. My black hair was pulled into a messy side ponytail and to my despair, I had inherited genes from my dad's parents. The tips of my hair went from black to red, not orange but red. It was natural too so I always had to explain this when a teacher asked me why my hair was dyed. My eyes were also something I had inherited from my grandparents, they were bi-colored. One was a minty green that most wouldn't think was natural while the other was a steely silver with hints of my dad's icy blue eyes. I thought brown eyes were the dominant gene but apparently I was wrong. Then instead of my mom's tan skin, I had gotten my grandma's sickly pale color, Chris and Jack were not too tan but not too pale either. I sighed and went and pulled my head into my pillow. I was wearing my usual pajamas, my brother's formal button up shirts with a pair of black booty shorts that were almost hidden under the shirt. I loved wearing big shirts that I got from guys, so Jack and Chris.

Jack refused to wear fancy dress shirts and instead wore those shirts that were black tees with a tuxedo drawing on the front. It bothered my parents but Chris found it funny and it amused me on the inside.

My head was in the pillow for a reason, I was trying to suffocate myself. I never slept well and it took its tolls on me, I looked like the living dead. I heard a knock on my door and I just yelled a "What?" into my pillow. The door open and my mom came up into my room. She reminded me of a small Asian lady like she should; she was a small Asian lady. None of me or my siblings inherited the facial structure though, just her hair, and for Chris, her eye color.

"Itami, get dressed. We're going out for breakfast." she said making her way to my anime wall to glare at it distastefully. Then she glared at the unhidden switchblade on my desk, I usually kept it in a hollowed book but I took it out to sharpen it and forgot to put it back.

"What is it with you and your weapons? What is it with you and your colorful animated TV? Why can't you be a normal girl? Why can't you wear skirts and not wear so much dark things and makeup?" she ranted, she always took out her frustration on me. So did my dad, here was how they worked. My mom took down self esteem and mind while my dad got physical. Jack and Chris were guys and 3 years older so they weren't attacked. I had scars though, I always wonder why me but then realize, oh yeah, I'm the one with random genes from the family gene pool. My parents hated things to stick out, so when Jack put on his tuxedo shirt, mom wouldn't let us leave until he changed. I usually stayed home.

"I even got you something new to wear!" she chirped, ooh a present? For the unwanted child? Great. From behind her she pulled out some folded clothes that I already disliked from the fact they were bright pink and white. She held them out for me to observe. The top was a tube top and was bright pink. It would go to my bellybutton and that was a problem because my mom hated piercings, and my bellybutton was pierced.

Uh oh that's problem number one. Problem number two with the shirt was it would show my scars. Next was the skirt, it was short and white with pink flowers on it. Problem with it, it showed scars and was way too short!

I was not wearing that. I glared at it, one of the emotional things I did was glare.

"Change." ordered my mom in the tone that clearly stated 'Change or I'm calling your father'. I sighed and grabbed the clothes before walking into the bathroom my awesome attic bedroom had.

I changed and found it to be uncomfortably pushing my breasts up making them look bigger. My breasts had already been bigger than I'd have wanted them, now it was way too uncomfortable. Then on my arms clear lines were formed from my wrist to elbow from self-cutting, I relieved stress that way. I know it's wrong and I have tried stopping, if you look the newest one is on my wrist and is a newer scar, it was 6 months old. Then the skirt showed my legs, they were skinny and long making me the proud 5'9 I was. I surpassed my mother but my dad was taller than me being 6'4. Then Jack and Chris were taller, being 5'11 and 6'1 respectively.

"Come out and show me how pretty you are." demanded my mom when I noticed I had been in there for 10 minutes. I walked out and her critical eyes scanned me making me feel smaller.

"Hm, your breasts are good and you have hips and a flat stomach. I don't know where your figure is from seeing mine but the top makes you look good and the skirt shows your legs. And that piercing looks good with your others but I'd prefer you to only have one in your ears." she said and then noticed my hair. "Let me do your hair." she said and this was one of our bonding moments that we had once in a blue moon. She took my waist length hair and pulled it into a neat Chinese style bun and smiled at me when she was done.

"You look nice Itami, now let's go." she said grabbing my arm. I rolled my eyes, she made me wear white wedged sandals, I think that's the term. I hate fashion so I wouldn't know.

We all poured into the white car, I was stuck against the window because Jack wanted to fool around with Chris.

"Hey Itami what are you wearing?" asked Jack noticing my discomfort at sitting because my skirt was almost showing my underwear.

"Fashionable clothing." said mom from the shot gun seat. My dad was driving, I didn't like this idea because his eyes were slightly red showing he was having a hangover. That was probably why the beating last night he stabbed me with a kitchen knife, no worries. I had wrapped up my shoulder so that I wasn't bleeding. I felt Jack trace a scar on my shoulder.

"You have so many scars." he muttered to himself as Chris leaned over him to trace one from my thumb to my elbow.

Then Jack noticed something. He flipped my arm over and noticed the lines in rows and crisscrossed going from my wrist to my elbow. He stared and so did Chris.

"Itami…" he whispered. I grabbed my arm back and looked out the window.

"Red punch buggy!" yelled Chris whacking Jack breaking the silence because they began beating each other up.

"Both of you shut up!" snapped my dad. His driving was shaky, I think he had a bottle of something when he woke up.

Jack and Chris stopped but a few seconds later.

"Hey look!" yelled Jack pointing at a disturbing sight, a man was jogging wearing neon shorts that looked like a skirt and was very short; he was pale and wasn't wearing a shirt. I honestly think he was a stripper that forgot to pull his shorts off. My mom stared in disgust.

"People these days." she said and unfortunately, Chris heard this.

"You think that's weird? At the high school a kid showed up naked!" said Chris snorting from laughter, Jack startedlaughing. That kid was expelled, and lost his girlfriend, his dignity was obviously gone too. The laughing was too loud for my dad's sensitive hangover/drunk again state.

He turned around in his seat, took his hands off the wheel and yelled "Shut the hell up!"

That's when my mom screamed. We all looked forward and I swear it was slow motion. The car swerved to the right and the shotgun seat's airbag went off as we smashed into a truck. Then our car flung around smashing into another car and finally a car behind us smashed into my side behind my dad after we did a 360 spin. My window smashed and something smacked my head because the last thing I remember was a pain in my head and me thinking 'I thought I was going to die from a beating'.

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I apparently wasn't killed.

I woke up with a blinding white ceiling facing me and an annoying beeping. I was confused as hell. Where was I? I looked around and familiarized myself with the room, mainly white with a black TV that was off, a light wood toned dresser, an open door, a closed door, a curtain, and a sink was what I could see. Then I was in a bed, it had uncomfortable scratchy sheets and was up more than down.

I tried to sit up and a shooting pain flew through my head making my arm go to my forehead. Something tugged at my arm and I looked at it. It was a needle, inserted into my arm, leading to an IV and machine that was making the annoying beeping. It hit me.

Hospital, I was in a hospital. I looked around more to notice no one was visiting, I began to worry. What if Chris and Jack didn't make it? What if mom didn't make it? I didn't care if dad made it or not, I hated him.

My hand reached to the orange nurse button on the side of my bed, I remember visiting some relative and them always pushing the nurse button that's how I knew what it was. A nurse appeared about 5 minutes later.

"Ah hello Miss Duncan, how are you feeling?" asked the woman, she was average, blonde-brown hair and blue eyes looking at me with false happiness.

"W-what happened?" I asked. She came closer and sat in the chair next to my bed.

"Well of the car wreck your mother was put in ICU, you were the next most injured and are in ICU. Your two brothers aren't too bad with one having a sprained shoulder and the other having a sprained wrist. Your father was saved by the airbag." she explained slowly, I was injured not dumb or retarded lady.

I hated hospitals because they underestimate their patients. My grandmother that I actually liked was almost worthy of being a ninja from Naruto. She escaped the hospital 3 times unnoticed, made it home, and was pretty much in perfect health and only there because of bad blood tests from idiotic doctors.

"How was I injured?" I asked. "Just your head was hit when another car ran into yours, you were knocked out for 2 days." said the nurse. Oh great, I missed Monday of school, probably the rest of the week too from what my grandmother tells me about her hospital visits.

"Ok, can I go home?" I asked and she nodded. Guess grandma was wrong.

"When your father comes to pick you up, can you get ready on your own after I take out your IV?" she asked and I nodded. She took out all the machines in me, more than I thought, and let me get up before leaving to call my dad. I changed into clothes Jack or Chris had probably brought; a black sweatshirt that said 'Bite Me' on the chest, and black ripped jeans and my favorite black combat boots. Then someone had remembered my black leather gloves. As I was fixing my chest length bangs to hand over the right side of my face to cover my blue eye the doctor arrived.

"Miss Duncan?" he asked and I turned around after pulling the rest of my hair into a bun on the opposite side of my head, but the bun was half complete so I had hair from a ponytail coming from it, I liked it that way.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"You had slight brain damage, so if there is anything weird, behavior, seeing things, hearing problems, insomnia, etc please tell me." he said, he looked like a doctor. Slightly balding with brown eyes that looked black.

"Ok, but I already have insomnia." I said and he nodded.

"Maybe that was fixed." he said with a smile and laugh, I just stayed with a blank face.

The door opened again to real Jack and Chris.

"Tami!" said Jack as he ran and grabbed me in a bear hug around my waist and lifting me onto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. The doctor just kind of stared as I glared at the floor.

"Down." I said when Chris came over to steal me from Jack. They listened and plopped me down on my feet.

"C'mon dad signed you out so we can leave now!" said Chris and I looked at my doctor, to find thin air. When did he leave?

"Alright." I said and we all left.

"So how's mom?" I asked as we waited in the elevator. "Good, she is awake but can't talk and has breathing tubes." said Jack. That was good? The doors opened and we left, the security desk was empty. No wonder grandma always left so easily.

My dad was waiting in our other car; it was only a 4 person vehicle though unless you really wanted to be squished in the back. So Chris took shot gun.

"We made you a cake Tami!" said Jack and I studied my dad.

"Hn." I said as I looked for signs of rage or drunkenness. He had slightly red eyes and a fire to them; I was getting beaten tonight for sure.

We got home and I immediately left for my room where I turned on my computer and looked up the newest Naruto episode I missed while unconscious. I enjoyed it and then started drawing an Akatsuki member, Deidara to be exact. I already knew what was going to happen to the ones from the Japanese being ahead of us Americans. That was because I watched subbed too, so really I just watched the newest sub. I do watch them in English to compare though and I must say, Hidan is better in Japanese because he cuss's more. But I like cussing on TV so I shouldn't be blamed. Actually I liked cussing in general, but I didn't cuss as much as I could because of the threat of being beaten.

I heard my door being pulled down but I ignored it, too interested in getting Deidara's hair right. I loved his hair, it looks cool. I tried getting my hair like that and failed horribly, so I kept my half ponytail bun to the side with a bang thing.

All of a sudden something grabbed my head by the roots of my hair and my face was smashed into my desk. Reasons why this hurt more than it should, I had my piercings in. I had my tongue and lip pierced with one piercing. Then I had a labret, 3 piercings on each eyebrow, and 1 on each nostril. Then I had 1 bar going through my ear, 2 hoops in my cartilage, and 2 stubs on my lobe. Then my bellybutton but you already know that.

My face was pulled back up and I was forced around at an awkward angle to meet my father's drunken glare.

"Say goodnight, bitch." he said slamming my face onto the floor before kicking his boot into my side. I clutched my side and he grabbed my switchblade from my desk. My eyes widened as he flipped it out and swung it down at me. I rolled to the side and he got it stuck in the floor.

"Its yur fault yur mother isn't here!" he said, the alcohol was stinking up the room from his breath and he was slurring slightly. I stood up and clutched my side as I tried to get to the trapdoor. he grabbed my hair again and threw me into the wall. I fell on my side and he gave me one last kick on the back before snarling "Lousy whore." and leaving.

I closed and locked my door before changing into Chris's 3 Days Grace tee shirt that I stole and a pair of dark blue booty shorts and I curled into bed. The lights were out and I could see out the small window above my bed perfectly.

I watched the starless night for awhile until a shooting star crossed my path.

"Star light, star bright. The first star I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight." I mumbled before pulling my hands together and whispering to my closed hands. "I wish my life were better." and like that with my hands clasped in a hand sign, I fell asleep.

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I woke up to rustling leaves, I went along with it sleepily until the thought that I shouldn't hear leaves from my room. I opened my eyes to the bright of daylight; my thoughts were 'What the hell?' as I scanned my surroundings more. I was in a grassy area with trees surrounding me. I obviously was wondering what happened and why I was outside. I'm going to kill Jack and Chris.

I got up and looked around more. I found that the trees weren't completely like the ones back home, how far did they take me for this? It can't be too far seeing as how I barely ever sleep. And my trapdoor was locked too, you can't pick it either. I was still in my pajamas except they showed my scars because it wasn't long-sleeved like Jack's dress shirt.

I sighed and began walking; if they brought me out here they wouldn't have left me far away from help, or them. I walked along what seemed like a worn path in the dirt. I walked for what seemed like forever, it was a good thing I liked walking barefoot. The rocks were killer though.

I walked until I heard voices. "So what are we doing exactly, hm?" asked a voice, it sounded a lot like Deidara from Naruto but it couldn't be. I walked towards the voices.

"We've been sent to find a maid." said a deeper, and creepier voice that sounded like Hiruko Sasori. That scared me so I started to speed walk out of there instead of getting closer. "Hey look, hm." I froze. Then I hid behind a tree, sank to the floor and closed my eyes. All noise seemed to stop. That was never good. I counted to 10, and opened my eyes.

I found a blue eye face to face with my blue eye, so the one showing. I screamed and pushed out with my hands and pushed the guy back a little. I jumped up and reached for my pocket to find I was in my pajamas. I didn't have my weapons! I looked at my offenders.

One guy was dressed in a black robe with a red outlined cloud pattern. He had blonde hair in a ponytail with a bang covering one eye but his other eye showing was an ocean blue.

The other guy didn't look human. It had the same robe and it had an iron tail coming from it. Its face had something covering its mouth and it seemed to be, wooden? Maybe, I couldn't tell the material but I did know it wasn't skin. They looked like Deidara and Hiruko Sasori from Naruto.

"She could be our new maid Danna, uh." said the blonde sounding like Deidara from Naruto.

"Knock her out Deidara." said the thing. My eyes widened and I froze. Deidara? Oh my god, I wasn't dreaming. I could tell, my bruise that was forming because of the kick hurt.

"I think she froze up." said Deidara. "Besides, I like it when they run, hm." said Deidara and he grabbed me and hefted me over his shoulder.

"She's light." he said and the thing nodded.

"Let's go." he said. "Yeah, yeah, I know how you don't like to be kept waiting, Sasori my man." said Deidara.

There was no doubt now, I was in Naruto.

Oh my fucking god, or now should I say Jashin?

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**Author's Note:**

** I edited this to fix some things I noticed, also a huge thanks to _SaphiraEragon_ who told me how to update new chapters and gave me advice on how to space everything. I do like it better this way so you were right. Anyway i'm working on the next chapter and it should be better since its noon and not 12 at night this time. **

** Q-Who's your favorite Akatsuki member?**


	2. Traveling

** Author's Note:**

** Second chapter is up. In my opinion this chapter isn't as good as i would like it to be, i prefer the 1st chapter to this one. Any suggestions for making my writing please tell me and pleae review. :) Oh and another big thanks to _SaphiraEragon_**

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Traveling

You know how in those stories online how they say being found by the Akatsuki is good? And how they're gentle with you and protect you? I think I want to stab them in the eyes with my switchblade now because they lied! Let's go back to where I first started getting carried.

"She's light." said Deidara carrying me on his shoulder through the forest. Every time he moved I would get jabbed into his shoulder at an angle that made it painful. Then he would move the branches for himself but not me, so he would duck his head and they would whack me. I had cuts from this and when he dropped me on the floor headfirst because he had to use the bathroom.

"She isn't even struggling, you alive girl, hm?" Deidara asked me after I was poked in the eye by a branch making me rub my eye. I stayed silent.

"I was talking to you girl, uh!" said Deidara purposely whacking me into a branch. I still stayed silent.

"She agrees with me that you're a nuisance Deidara." said Sasori and Deidara probably glared at him. I was watching behind us since Deidara had me on his shoulder.

"No she doesn't, hm! She loves me, right girl?" he asked.

"I agree with the it." I said making him drop me.

"Then you can have him carry you, hm!" said Deidara, Sasori glared at him. Or should I say Hiruko since he was hiding in him.

"Brat, I'm not carrying her, it's your job." he said with tone that stated 'Do it or I'll kill you' tone. I always have wondered who would win in a Deidara against Sasori match, but not in videogames where you're playing against the game or someone else. I mean in the anime where it's pure them.

They had a glaring contest for a few moments in which I wondered if I could outrun them. I came to the conclusion that I would be noticed before I even started running and they would have me in seconds.

"Fine, hm." said Deidara after a moment before picking me up again and hauling me over his shoulder. I started counting the pebbles on the path as he walked.

About probably an hour later, and a good 2000 pebbles we came upon a random dumpling shop in the middle of nowhere.

"Let's get something to eat, hm." said Deidara dropping me on the floor giving me a bump on my head where I landed. I gave him a glare but he ignored it and instead opted to go and order dumplings.

"Damn brat." muttered Sasori and I looked at him.

"So what are you guys doing with me exactly?" I asked and he looked at me.

"We need a maid, you just happened to be the first we found." said Sasori, I didn't like his Hiruko voice. It scared me a little.

"Oh, so if I were a useless maid what would happen to me?" I asked, I was curious. If I were to guess I would be killed.

"You would be killed." said Sasori emotionless, I simply stared. Wow that was like, how did I guess it? Now there was an awkward silence. Deidara came back a few moments later. At least he ended the awkward silence.

"Did you get anything for the girl brat?" asked Sasori. Deidara shook his head.

"No, all she's doing is being carried so i firgured she didn't need any, hm." asked Deidara and I glared. What was I supposed to do? I couldn't exactly say to my kidnapper, can I walk with you? I was not going to help my kidnappers! I was going to be carried like the kidnapped person I was.

"Give her food, she's skinnier than she should be." said Sasori and Deidara groaned before throwing a stick of dumplings at me. I luckily caught them before they stabbed me in the eye. I gave Deidara a glare.

"Thanks." I muttered quietly as I took a bite of the dumpling. It was pretty good, a sweetish taste. I liked it.

"Did you hear that Danna? She thanked me, uh!" said Deidara with a victory smirk in Sasori's direction.

"Yes I heard brat, now shut up and eat so we can get moving." said Sasori and Deidara glared at him mumbling under his breath about damn puppet masters. I finished my dumpling and sadly watched as Deidara devoured a few more sticks. He noticed my sad puppy eyes staring at him.

"No you can't have more, hm." said Deidara. I learned puppy eyes from Jack dumbass, you can't say no to me. I pouted a little.

"No." said Deidara looking away. I swear at this point I started emanating cute, but so does Jack sometimes. That's why I tried my best to suppress all emotion. Of course I left out irritation and my useful cuteness emanation, does that even make sense? Well it does now.

Deidara made the mistake of looking back at me.

"Fine." he said after a moment and he threw another dumpling stick at me. I went back to my usual frown and took a big bite out of my dumplings.

We walked longer and by we walked, I mean they walked and Deidara carried me like a sack of potatoes again. It was pretty annoying and I was now being jabbed more by my chest since I had been falling off Deidara so he pulled me up by my legs.

"How long until we get back Danna, uh?" asked Deidara, I was silently wondering that too.

"Soon we will stop for the night, we can't use chakra with the girl." said Sasori, so that's why we're slowly walking at a non-ninja's pace.

I stared at the trees we passed. Then I noticed something. People were following us, ninja? Yes ninja, they were jumping from tree to tree.

"We have company, uh." said Deidara as he dropped me on the floor and threw his hands in pouches under his cloak. A kunai was thrown from the approaching ninja and it landed in a tree right above my head. I paled if possible, remember, I'm already extremely pale.

I pulled the kunai from the tree and held it like I would my switchblade; I would be a good match for a Genin with my kunai now, but anything more and it'll be bad for me. Deidara and Sasori went to attacking the bigger looking ninja; I used this as my escape. I quickly flew into a bush and started running as fast as I could. I was slow compared to whoever was pursuing me. Then they tackled me.

I landed on the ground with a grunt and I flipped over ready to stab whoever tackled me with my kunai. To my dismay it was a character from Naruto, it was Kiba. Kiba had brown hair, tan skin, and two red triangle tattoos on his cheeks. From behind Kiba I noticed Akamaru, where I am now must be Shippuden, or close to it because Akamaru was the size of a mini horse and Kiba had a black jacket without a hood. In Shippuden he is a Chunin, I was screwed. I was on my feet quickly and I started moving back slowly with my kunai out and my eyes wide. My back hit a tree, crap.

"Hey Akamaru, she doesn't look like a ninja, do you think she was being kidnapped?" asked Kiba to his large dog. Akamaru barked, I'm sorry but I don't understand dogs so I can't tell you exactly what he said.

"Yeah, I was." I said and Kiba looked at me.

He had no time to say anything though because the bushes parted and Deidara came through with two clay birds coming at Kiba. I jumped behind the tree I had backed up against. A small explosion came and I curled into a ball and stayed like that until silence came. I counted to 10, briefly wondered if I should open my eyes seeing as what happened last time, and opened them anyway. Deidara's eyes looked back at me, although I simply stared instead of freaking out this time.

"Ready, uh?" he asked grabbing me and hauling me over his shoulder, he didn't notice my kunai. Sasori did though.

"Deidara you fool, she has a kunai." said Sasori knocking the kunai from my hands with his tail. I glared at Sasori for doing this; I'm not that valuable am I? I'm just supposed to be a maid! Not that I want to be that either.

We walked forever again, but this time we made it to a town. It was probably a small farming village, or a trading village. It had a quaint look and had children running around the streets. As we entered Deidara put me down, gentler than usual.

"Aright, we're staying in an inn tonight so no funny business, got it?" he asked receiving a nod. There was a silent threat of, do what we say or die.

We walked through the town and I looked around, it was such a nice place. It had flowerbeds and trees by the shops, and the market had a small fountain in the middle. All in all, I liked the place. We stopped at a shadier looking place and went in. The inside wasn't as bad as the outside, but I'd have preferred the cuter and homier inn we had passed a while back.

"A room with two beds." said Deidara, I noticed him and Sasori had put hats on, you know those straw ones that covered their face. The desk woman, a dark haired woman who was kind of large and looked like she could beat a sumo wrestler, looked at Sasori and me suspiciously.

"They're just odd, hm." said Deidara receiving glares from both Sasori and me. He ahd to insult us? At least it got us a room. We went up to the room and when we got in, Sasori came out of Hiruko. I stared for a moment; Sasori was actually kind of handsome. Almond eyes, tan skin, and red hair that looked soft. He noticed my staring.

"You thought I actually looked like that?" he asked, his voice was nice. I preferred this one over Hiruko's.

"No but I wasn't expecting you to look like that." I said, I honestly wasn't expecting him to be so…handsome.

"What? Handsome? Human?" he asked teasingly. I wisely chose to stay silent. Deidara snorted before jumping and laying on one of the beds and playing with some clay.

"Brat, where is the girl going to sleep?" asked Sasori, a silence came over us all.

"….The floor, hm?" asked Deidara receiving a glare from me, I was not sleeping on the floor!

"Brat, she will share with you then. And go with ehr to get new cltohes, she stands out in what she's wearing." said Sasori before claiming the other bed. I looked at Deidara.

"Fine hm." said Deidara before slowly getting up, grabbing my arm, and pulling me out of the inn. Why was he pulling me?

"Ok, what colors do you look good in?" asked Deidara looking at me. He looked me over. had he not have the adantage i'd have yelled "My eyes are up here!" before smacking him but sadly, he would probably send an explosive clay bird at me.

"Black." I said simply, it was true. Dark colors looked perfect on me. He shook his head and continued looking me over.

"Hm, you would look good in green or blue." said Deidara before grabbing me again and pulling me into a store I had no time to read the name on.

"Pick something out, uh." said Deidara and i walked around before gathering somethings i didn't mind.

"Try them on, uh." he said before pointing to a dressing room. I sighed and walked in. I pulled on a dark blue tunic top with grey leggings. Then Deidara had chosen to give me black ninja sandals when he noticed my lack of shoes. In all honesty, I never noticed. I pulled them on and looked distastefully at my arms. I wished I had something to cover them up.

I walked out and Deidara nodded, got me another pair and slipped out without paying. The securtiy in this store lacked, with my knowledge on stealing things from stores in modern days I could rob half the store without anyone noticing. At least Deidara could get away with it though.

As we were walking back to the hotel room I noticed that some people wore bandages around their arms or legs.

"Deidara?" I asked and Deidara looked at me in confusion; I hadn't really spoken to him much.

"Yeah hm?" he asked, I think he was happy I actually used his name.

"Can I get some bandages to wrap my arms up? I don't like it when my arms are showing, It slows me down and makes me cold." I said lying, I never really got cold unless in extreme cold. And how can having my arms exposed slow me down? At least he bought it.

"Sure, uh." he said and a few minutes later I had two bandage rolls and my arms wrapped tightly, I don't think Deidara or Sasori noticed my scars yet. Good thing too, I really don't want to have to explain myself to them.

We went back to the inn and Sasori nodded in approval at my clothes. Sasori was working on another puppet; it wasn't huge like Hiruko though, I think Hiruko was stored away in a scroll. But what would I know?

"Good job brat, she looks like a normal girl now, why are her arms bandaged though?" asked Sasori as he looked me over again.

"She wanted to wrap her arms up, hm." said Deidara pulling his cloak off and lying back on the empty bed to play with his clay. I noticed his palm hands; I stared for a good 10 minutes until he noticed.

"What? Oh, my hands, uh. Yeah, they have mouths that help me with my clay, uh." said Deidara. Now I wasn't staring in horror, I was staring in fascination, I had always liked Deidara's hands and now that they were real, it was awesome.

"Cool." was the only response I could say; now Deidara was staring at me in shock. Most people would probably not find his hand mouths cool. Sasori was ignoring us, somewhere during our staring he muttered something about being stuck with idiots, and he better not have been calling me one. I didn't care at the moment though. I was too busy staring at Deidara's hands. Deidara snapped out of the staring first and seemed to realize something.

"It's late, uh. I'm going to go and get something to eat, hm. Are you allergic to anything girl?" he asked, I just realized I never told him my name. I did have allergies but they were weird ones.

"I'm allergic to tomatoes, pickles, and pears. Don't ask, oh and stop calling me girl, my names Itami." I snapped, I hated my allergies. I didn't know anyone else who was allergic to tomatoes, pears, or pickles!

Deidara stared for a moment. Then opened his mouth but my glare silenced him. He left leaving Sasori and I in silence, thankfully not an awkward one. When he came back he brought food, I don't know what it was but I didn't mind it. It wasn't good like a dumpling though. I think my new favorite food is dumplings. I finished my food last, Deidara had finished quickly and Sasori hadn't eaten.

"Time for bed." declared Deidara with little to no emotion before going into the bathroom. I looked to Sasori who had a book out, where'd he get the book from? I opened my mouth but Sasori cut me off.

"I don't sleep but I'm sitting here reading all night, you're sharing with Deidara." he said with a tone that stated 'Don't ask again'. Why did I have to share with Deidara? Sasori could have gotten a chair or something! Deidara came back out in what I guessed was his pajamas. He was wearing a fishnet shirt and black shorts. Sasori was sitting there in his robe on his bed.

"You can wear that to bed." said Deidara before sliding into bed and turning his light off. I wasn't sleeping near him though s i curled up in a ball at the end of the bed. As i fell asleep i could feel Sasori's gaze burning holes in my back.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

** Don't ask about her allergies, please. Once again this chapter isn't as good as i wish it was and i might come back and redo it later.**

** My favorite Akatsuki? I would list them like this**

**1st-Deidara-He has hand mouths and awesome hair, and hes an artist like me**

**2nd-Kisame-He looks like a shark and has a huge sword, I love weapons and swords**

**3rd-Hidan-He cuss's, is a Jashinist, is immortal, and has silver hair**

**4th-Konan- She fights with paper and is smart**

**5th-Tobi/Madara-Dunno why i like him, Tobi's funny and Madara is strong, but he killed Konan so he's farther back than before**

**6th-Kakuzu-Him and Hidan are funny together, plus Kakuzu has 5 hearts! I find that cool**

**7th-Pein-His piercings, definately the piercings, oh and the Rinnegan.**

**8th-Zetsu-Hm, I like how in fanfiction he usually argues with himself, I haven't really seen him too much in the anime.**

**9th-Sasori-I forgot about him since he was the first to die, I like his hair. That's about it.**

**10th-Itachi-I don't like him for some reason, I like the Sharingan and his hair but hate him. **

** I don't know why, i just don't like Itachi for some reason. Maybe its because he's related to Sasuke who I dislike.**

**_Ichigo1508_-Tobi/Madara is in my top 5, he would be higher if he hadn't killed Konan. I liked Konan, she was cool and fought with paper! I'm jealous, I can't make origami to save my life, save for paper jumping frogs and shuriken.**

** Did anyone notice how i kept forgetting to have her name given to them? I kept forgetting, that and everytime I would get to it Lexi would randomly turn my laptop off and I would have to turn it back on and get back my train of thought that i lost by yelling at her. Then she started hitting me with drum sticks, they tickled more than they hurt.**

** I redid this chapter because i was told Deidara was a little ooc, did i fix it a little? Hope so.**

** Q-Who is your favorite Leaf Ninja be? Top 5 if you can't name one.**

** End of this long ranting Author Note, lucky you**


	3. A Dream?

**Author's Note:**

**Yes i know i put out too many chapters in 1 day and i will slow down, eventually. It helps that i'm going on vacation in almost a week and there is no internet there so i can't update. Thanks to _SaphiraEragon_ for editing and making my writing better. Enjoy!**

* * *

A dream

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. I woke up to that. I rubbed my eyes and looked around, seeing as every time I wake up I'm somewhere else. Right now I was back in my awesome attic room.

"Must have been a dream." I mumbled to myself as I looked at my still beeping alarm clock. The clock said it was 5;30… In the morning. I glared at the thing; it had to interrupt one of my rare sleeps? I almost never slept, or slept well. Damn alarm clock and damn insomnia. I got up, and a blade of pain stabbed me right in the legs. So I looked down, and saw that my legs were all cut up.

"Huh…?" I mumbled in confusion. How did my legs get all cut up? I shook my head, dismissing it, but then noticed I wasn't in my usual pajamas, I was in a black tunic top with bandaged arms and pants leading into black ninja sandals. My confusion escalated.

"What the hell?" I wondered aloud as I walked over to my mirror. I looked like I did in my dream, could it have been real? No, nothing like that exists. I quickly changed out of the clothes and put them on my desk chair. I changed into my usual school clothes, a dark green tank top covered by my black 'Bite Me' sweatshirt, black ripped jeans, and my black combat boots. I fixed my hair and pulled my black fingerless leather gloves on before walking downstairs.

My brothers were fighting over bacon, how lovely. Then, they noticed me, unfortunately. First thing in the morning when I'm still confused and them talking to me isn't the best.

"Tami you're up!" said Jack and Chris snorted at him. Jack glared at him as if challenging him.

"Of course she's up, she needs to go to school." said Chris as if it were obvious, which it should have been.

I just ignored them as I walked over to the fridge and looked through it trying to find something good. I was going to eat an apple when I was pulled by my hood over to the table and forced into a chair.

"Cake for breakfast!" said Jack and Chris in unison as they pushed a plate with cake on it to me. I looked at them in more confusion. Cake? Really?

"It's the cake we made you for when you felt better! You never came down last night so you have to be hungry from not eating for an entire day." For those of you who didn't know I ate in the hospital before I left.

"Oh, ok." I said grabbing a fork and starting in on the cake. For those of you who don't know when the two of them combine their cooking skills, you have a 5 star chef. When they're on their own though, don't eat what they make. Once Jack made spaghetti without Chris, and I swear, it moved! Then there's me, I have awesome cooking skills, I can make anything, when I want to of course. I wonder if I can make dumplings… Jack snapped me from my thoughts.

"Is it good?" he asked, I didn't even notice I had been eating in all honesty. I took another bite of the cake and nodded. I liked the cake, it had a chocolaty vanilla taste. I loved their cakes since I had a bit of a sweet tooth. I also loved spicy foods.

I looked at the time again and groaned, I had to leave now.

I hate school.

I have exactly 2 friends, and the rest of the school seemed to be against me. I waved to Jack and Chris who had started wrestling for some reason, they stopped for a second to wave back and they started wrestling again.

"Idiots." I muttered under my breath as I grabbed my schoolbag and started walking to school.

My neighborhood wasn't so bad, but it wasn't the greatest. It looked friendly, but the kids were nasty besides the few nice ones. I could list the nice ones on my block on one hand, and the rest fall around the other blocks in-between all the nasty ones. Then in school, it was classes. The lowest was level were the Goths who were picked on and avoided, next were nerds, just picked on but they had their own groups, then regulars, they weren't picked on as much and included the nicer kids. The last groups were preps and jocks, so cheerleaders and football players. They enjoyed physical and emotional torture; I was a big hit with them since I had nasty comebacks of my own. Basically my school was like the ones you see on TV.

As I walked to school some expensive car drove along me until I glared at the driver, Kenji Torres. He was a jock who for some reason loved me but still teased me. I hated his guts. He was handsome too, tan skin, almond brown eyes, and dark hair, he was a football player too, but I hate him. Mostly because he's irritating.

"Hey Tami." he said. Here's reason No. 1 he is annoying: he calls me Tami. I tolerate it from Jack and Chris, him I don't.

"Call me Tami one more time and you'll meet Mr. Switch." I said, and Kenji looked at me in confusion. He didn't know what Mr. Switch was? I called my favorite 8 inch black handled switchblade Mr. Switch so that I could threaten annoying kids without the teachers noticing as much.

"Who's Mr. Switch?" asked Kenji. I smiled deviously and reached into my boot and pulled out the handle. I flicked out the blade.

"This is Mr. Switch." I said and he chuckled nervously. He should be nervous, Mr. Switch looked bigger than 8 inches.

"Err… See you later, Itami." he said before driving away. I happily walked to school in peace after that.

School was fine until gym. I excel in gym, and all other girls don't. My teacher, Ms. Arson, started putting me with the guys. When we play dodge ball they all aim for me at once, it hurts when I get hit in my chest. Like I said earlier, my breasts were bigger than I'd like.

The school provides gym clothes too, they are tight white shirts and dark blue short shorts for girls so all I hide under my usual clothes comes out in gym. If I were my best friend, I'd have screamed FML in gym after being pegged down.

My best friend's name was Sky, she was…eccentric? She had bright blue eyes and light brown hair that she kept in a mass of curly short hair that if she straightened would reach her shoulders. She usually wore a tank top of any color, shorts of another shade of that color, and red converse. She loved art and going outside. Most people wonder why we're friends from our differences.

Back to gym, we were now in gym and for lack of better words it was a bad day. We were doing the one thing I suck at in gym, volleyball. Sky was on my team along with the only other person I got along with, her boyfriend, Josh. He had brown hair that he used a lot of hair gel on and brown eyes that usually made him look tired, I always wonder why though because he is almost always sleeping! He was never good in sports, except basketball and soccer; he was amazing at basketball and soccer. It must be natural for him since his mom is a basketball player and his dad is a soccer player.

Back to volleyball. On the other team, it was 3 again 3 for some reason, we had preps, Angela, Ashley, and Amy. I called them the Triple A's. They were all blonde blue eyed Barbies that somehow were able to hit the volleyball and not complain about their manicures. I stayed away from the ball and let Sky do all the work; she loved volleyball and was good at it too. I was kind of daydreaming for a little bit until Sky woke me from my reverie.

"Itami look out!" she yelled and I reflectively put my arms out and swung up, I hit the ball. I felt good about it until something hit me on the head making me fall on the floor almost unconscious. "Itami!" yelled Sky as her and Josh ran over. I was seeing double. Both Skies's asked how many fingers she was holding up.

"Four." I said and Sky shook her head before shaking me violently. It made my head worse, I was seeing triple now. Josh helped me up and to the nurse, I think. The nurse put an ice pack on my head and I stayed in the nurse for the rest of the school day seeing on how I was seeing double for a few hours. What hit me anyway?

When I went home I wasn't seeing double anymore, and I had a bag of ice on the lump on my head. When I walked into my house, Jack and Chris all but tackled and pulled me to my room.

"Itami are you ok? The nurse called!" cried Jack as I was forced onto my bed.

"Yeah she said a volleyball hit your head!" said Chris. Volleyball? But I hit the cursed thing!

"Go away, I'm fine." I muttered and both left after I pulled out Mr. Switch on them. I then grabbed my phone and found that Sky had texted me.

* * *

Sky- U ok?

Itami-Yeah, what happened?

Sky-The ball bounced off the ceiling and almost knocked you out.

Itami-Great, I knew volleyball was out to get me.

Sky-You weren't kidding, G2g, I have tons of HW that I have to do

Itami-Bye

* * *

I turned off my phone after that; I lost the charger so I needed to keep it off most of the time. I can't believe the volleyball bounced off the ceiling and hit me, the ceiling is so far up, and then think about how hard it is to hit me! I hate volleyball.

I spent the rest of the day watching more Naruto online; you see I believe in not doing homework. I didn't do it because I was smart and maintained a 97 average, it was down more because of my missing homework but I was smart and only studied in math.

That night I went down and grabbed a plate of dinner before coming back up to my room. I used my injury as an excuse, so I wouldn't get in trouble

"It's too loud for my head down here." I said as I left the kitchen, Jack yelled after me but I ignored him and went back to my Naruto episodes. I'm a nerd. And I'm damn proud of it too.

I heard my trapdoor open but I figured it was Jack, or Chris, or both. What I wasn't expecting was to be stabbed in the back with a knife, but who did expect that?

I yelled as I was pulled back by my hair with the knife still in my back as my dad glared at me. He pulled me onto the floor and grabbed the knife from my back before pulling my shirt up showing my back. He then, carved into my back. So nice of him to label me. When he was done he stabbed me in the shoulder and left silently. I got up and went over to the mirror before looking at the carving. Great, if that scarred I would have 'bitch' tattooed on my back forever.

I was too tired for some reason to bandage my back though. So instead I laid down on my bed and close my eyes. I had taken my sweatshirt off so it wouldn't get all bloody and like that, bleeding, I fell asleep.

* * *

Want to know what woke me up? Yelling.

"Damn it wake up, uh!" I heard. With that I opened my eyes feeling refreshed; I opened my eyes to Deidara standing by the bed. What I noticed was I was wearing my school pants and shoes, and my back was bleeding heavily. Deidara was yelling and Sasori was just watching him. I got up and fell down from blood loss I guess; I never did bandage that, bad move on my part.

Sasori got fed up with Deidara's panicking so he got up and grabbed my arm bandages. He then picked me up and pulled my shirt up before bandaging my back. I sat there dazed for a moment before reality set in.

I was back in Naruto. I had thought it was a dream but no; here I was again, bleeding from a cut I had gotten back in my world. What happened?

"Why were you bleeding, hm?' asked Deidara snapping me out of my thoughts. Oh crap, how was I going to explain this one?

"An old wound must have opened from my weird sleeping position." I said, wow I was a good liar. A smart one too.

"Where'd a civilian get a wound as bad as that one?" asked Sasori, damn him for being smart. Why couldn't he be dumb? Or just go with it?

"It's personal." I said and Sasori raised an eyebrow. He opened his mouth to continue but I cut him off.

"Don't ask, it's a bad memory." I said, and it was true. It was a bad memory, just not an old memory.

"Ok, well we're leaving for the base soon, we'll be there in a few hours and we're going to use chakra this time because we're behind schedule." said Sasori, turning around.

"Both of you get ready, and brat, stop staring at the blood." said Sasori and I noticed that there was a lot of blood on the comforter, like more blood than there should have been. I quickly pulled a tunic top over my tank and then changed out of my jeans into my ninja pants and I kept my boots since my ninja sandals were not here.

Deidara also changed and held me like a sack of potatoes again once we left the village. It was even more painful when he used chakra to run; I bounced with more force into his shoulder. I wonder if it will leave a bruise.

Somewhere during the run I began thinking about what had been happening. Ok so I am in a car accident and hit my head, the doctor told me to look out for weird signs, and this was something weird. But was it an illusion, or was it real? Was it a dream, or was it real? Then there's the fact that I first woke up here in my pajamas, changed into ninja clothes, and woke up back home in the same ninja clothes. What was going on? I also was injured in the real world, and that injury followed me here and almost made me bleed out. It was official, something weird was going on.

"We're here." said Sasori and Deidara let me down gently, Sasori snapped at him to do it gently so my back wouldn't start bleeding again. Then the force of it hit me. I was about to meet the rest of the Akatsuki, oh my Jashin….

I'm screwed, right?

* * *

**Author's Note:**

** Ha, Mr Switch. It was the first thing i could think of, besides, someone at my bus stop gave me the idea becaue he pulled out a switchblade a few weeks ago and said "Awe shit i forgot to leave Mr Switch at home."**

** Anyway i'm going to leave the same question up because i updated very fast.**

** _Verdigurl_- I like Might Gai too, he's funny. But not in my Top 5, maybe in my top 20, if i could list 20...**

** Q-Who is your favorite Leaf ninja? if you can't name 1, then your Top 5!**

** I'll give my Top 5 next chapter...**


	4. The Akatsuki

**Author's Note:**

**Another really fast update, yay. I think i'm going to use the same question as the last two chapters since i update way too fast. More thanks to _SaphiraEragon_ for editing and etc. Enjoy the chapter.**

* * *

The Akatsuki

I wonder if Sasori and Deidara could feel the nervousness I was emanating. I was pretty sure I was screwed. I glanced over at them as Sasori moved the rock that was in front of a mountain.

Sasori, as always had a slightly bored look slightly irritated look. I wonder if he ever smiled. Then Deidara had a look of… I can't explain it. He looked happy, but also had a look of contempt. Contempt for what?

The rock moved to reveal a dark room with a door at the end. We moved forward to the door, and Sasori opened it. What did I expect the Akatsuki hideout to look like? I don't really know, I was thinking a huge cave, or a building in the Hidden Rain. Not this. The door led you into a hallway; there were two doors and stairs. The stairs were at the end and the doors facing each other, both were open. Deidara moved for one of the open doors but Sasori started talking.

"This is the main hall, the brat will show you around, and bring you to Leader-Sama." said Sasori going up the stairs; did he ever put back the boulder? I wanted to check but Deidara started walking away so I did the smart thing, and followed him. He led me up the stairs, down a hall with a bunch of doors, down another hall to a door. He knocked on the door.

"Come in." said a voice on the inside. Deidara opened the door and we walked in. The leader was concealed in shadows in the back, so he looked majorly mysterious, but I have something on everyone here knowing everything about them, so I knew that he was Pein, one of Nagato's 6 paths.

"We found her to be the new maid, hm." said Deidara gesturing to me. The shadows eyes were all I could really make out, but I could tell they were the Rinnegan from the ringed purple and grey. His gaze was on me, and I felt like he was searching my soul… It was creepy.

"She will work. What is your name?" The shadow asked calmly.

"Itami." I said just as calmly. It will be a battle of calm!

"I see…. You will receive a room that you may stay in at night. Your job will be to clean the entire base, help the members in any way you can, and cook breakfast and dinner, lunch is only for those who ask." he said and I nodded.

I think the shadow was happy now, because he seemed more relaxed then when we walked in.

"Go and meet the rest of the Akatsuki and then report back for your room key and uniform. Deidara will take you, and have someone explain your duties to you." he said and then gestured for us to be gone. Deidara and I walked out and, Deidara turned to me.

"That was Leader-Sama; you will address him as Leader-Sama to his face. The rest of us just say Leader, except Sasori but he's boring. That was Leader's office, you must knock before entering. This hallway is where Leader, Konan, and Leader's office is. Konan is the only other female in this base, she is Leader's right hand woman I guess you would say, hm." said Deidara before walking down the hall into a new one.

"This hall is where you can find the training room, washroom, the door to the dungeon, and Zetsu's garden, un." said Deidara before walking back to the first hallway before the one with Leader's office. "Don't go in The Garden unless you value your limbs, yeah."

"This is where everyone's room is. Mine and Sasori's are right over there." He points in said direction, before continuing his rant.

"Itachi and Kisame have theirs over there. Tobi is there, and Kakuzu and Hidan over there. That one is empty and will probably be yours, un." he said. According to Deidara, mine was next to Tobi's and across from his and Sasori's. Then Hidan and Kakuzu were next to me, and Itachi and Kisame across from them.

We walked downstairs and Deidara pointed to one of the doors.

"That's the living room. It connects to the dining room." Deidara explained, walking into the room. In it was probably most of the organization. Kisame was watching the TV while Tobi was drawing on a paper. Itachi was reading a book and Kakuzu was counting money. Hidan was ranting on and on about 'Jashin-Sama', but no one was listening. Konan was sitting folding paper. The only ones missing were Sasori and Zetsu, plus Leader.

"Hey who's that bitch?" asked Hidan noticing me; at least he stopped ranting about Jashin. Although I was called a bitch… My eyebrow twitched slightly at that.

I'll get him back later.

"This is Itami, she's our maid." said Deidara before pointing to a door that led to another room probably behind the stairs.

"That's the dining room; it runs behind the stairs to the kitchen, the room across from this one. Tour done, hm." said Deidara before going to sit on the couch, he left me alone….

HE'S EVIL!

"Tobi likes Itami-Chan! She's pretty!" exclaimed Tobi, who then tackled me. That hurt. He was heavier than he looked, and I landed on my poor carved back. Tobi settled for sitting on me and staring at me from under his orange lollipop mask.

"Tobi, leave Itami alone." Kisame growled out, grabbing Tobi and lifting him off me. I nodded my thanks as he dropped Tobi on the couch. Kisame was cool. He was blue, tall, and had shark teeth. If that's not awesome, I don't know what is.

"I'm Kisame by the way; this is my partner, Itachi." said Kisame sitting next to Itachi. Itachi looked up from his book, nodded at me, and went back to reading. Is that considered rude? I consider it rude.

"I'm Hidan bitch, don't fucking forget It!" Hidan exclaimed, and he opened his mouth to say more but Kakuzu cut him off.

"And I'm Hidan's partner, Kakuzu, ignore him whenever he preaches." said Kakuzu, not looking up from his money… Can I consider that rude too? He didn't even look at me! Hidan started arguing with Kakuzu so I just blocked them out.

Then Konan introduced herself.

"I'm Konan, it's nice to meet you, and to have another girl in the base." She said sweetly. Konan was pretty. I was so jealous.

"Nice to meet you too Konan." I mumbled back shyly. She was nice too. I think we will get along just fine.

"I'll explain more of what you're going to do, it was mostly my job before." said Konan and she gestured for me to follow her. She led me into the kitchen.

"This is obviously the kitchen; you can find everything you need to cook in here. Dinner is usually around 7pm and breakfast is around 6am. You need to make enough for 9 people, so everyone but Zetsu and Sasori. Sasori doesn't eat and Zetsu is a cannibalistic plant-man." said Konan, and then she laughed at the face I was making. I was making a face when she said cannibal.

That sounds so great doesn't it?

"Next is cleaning, you can do the living room, training room, washroom, your own room, any member who requests for their room to be cleaned, the kitchen, the dining room, and the main bathroom. All other rooms are cleaned by someone else. On washday, every 2 days, you can go into each member's room and take their sheets, towels, and clothes from their wash basket." said Konan and I nodded. It was a simple system.

"Now, you're going to go see Leader now right?" she asked and I nodded. She led me to his room…. I could have made it myself; it wasn't as confusing as I thought it would be. She knocked on the door before going in, and I followed, closing the door behind me.

"Hello Konan, I see you've brought Itami. Did you explain her duties to her?" asked Leader from the shadows.

"Yes, I'm going to help her get settled in once you give her a room key and uniform." said Konan; I think she was more of an equal to Leader rather than a member of the organization.

"Very well." Leader sighed, gesturing to a box on the desk. Konan grabbed the box and we left. We then walked to my room. Konan unlocked the door and we walked in. Well, she floated gracefully, while I just walked.

"This room isn't too bad." said Konan as she observed it. The room's walls were a light grey and the floor was a light wood tone. My bed was in the corner and was probably the same size as my small bed back at home. The comforter was black and the pillows red. There were black curtains over a window that I would ask about later. There was a dresser that matched the floor next to a door that was open and led into a small bathroom that I could see a sink, toilet, and bathtub in. There was a full body mirror next to my desk, and the desk had a few papers on it. Then there was another door that probably led to a closet, so, all in all, the room was cozy.

"Do you like it?" asked Konan as she noticed I wasn't showing any emotion.

"It's nice, I like it." I said and she smiled. Then I opened my mouth to ask about the window but Konan cut me off.

"If it's about the window, there is a Jutsu placed on the hideout that makes the entire base look like a mountain, not the base being inside a mountain. The windows show what's outside but the outside can't see your window unless they know of the Jutsu." explained Konan, how did she know what I was going to ask? Am I that easy to read?

"Ok." I said simply, I wasn't going to explode and say 'Oh my Jashin how did you know?' like Sky probably would.

Konan placed the box on my desk and opened it before pulling a few sets of my uniform out. I didn't really like the uniform all that much. You see, I hate skirts and dresses, so guess what the uniform was.

The uniform had a black top with red short sleeves and the Akatsuki cloud pattern on it. Then the skirt was black with red lace and the Akatsuki cloud pattern again. Then there were black tights and a red bandana in it with black gloves and black ninja sandals. To complete the maid look there was a red apron with black frills. I liked the shoes and didn't mind the top, but I hated the skirt.

I think they were going for a Goth French maid look, that's what it reminds me of with the short skirt and stuff. I didn't mind the gloves; they went to my elbow and were black so they covered my scars. Konan gave me a glance of pity; she probably didn't like this outfit either.

"Do I have to?" I asked, slight horror could be detected in my voice. My emotion was showing but if you saw this outfit then you'd be in horror too!

"Yes, I pity you. If you bend down that skirt will definitely ride up, and you're in a base full of guys." said Konan. I groaned, as Konan handed me the clothes. I changed in the bathroom, it took 10 minutes because I was trying to fix my hair to go with the bandana. I had to wear my hair in a French braid with a small bang out to cover my green eye.

Then I wished I had my piercings…I had taken them out before I had gone to sleep apparently. I don't think anyone in the Akatsuki have seen my piercings yet. I don't sleep with them in; they hurt if you lay on them. Speaking of sleep, if I'm going from world to world when I sleep, I'm going 24-7. Won't I get tired? I stopped thinking about that and walked out. Konan nodded at me.

"You look nice, of course a little too much is showing if you ask me, but that's my opinion." said Konan. It was true, the top was low cut and the skirt was short, too much was showing if you ask me, I think I'm going to add a tank top and shorts to the uniform, I didn't really like it.

"Ready to start dinner?" asked Konan, I hadn't noticed how late it had gotten. Meeting people must take more time than I thought. Konan and I walked down to the kitchen. Konan showed me where all the food was, the utensils were, and gave me tips on things from the cookbook. I had dinner ready in an hour, and made something that I couldn't spell or pronounce even if I tried from the cookbook. When I asked Konan, she couldn't say it either. Everyone came in and took a seat at the table, I sat between Konan and Deidara, and I didn't want to sit next to Hidan who was eyeing me. I felt very uncomfortable.

"This is good Itami, what is it?" asked Kisame. I stared at it and then Konan and I shared a glance.

"We couldn't pronounce it." said Konan and I nodded. Then an awkward silence came over us. Now I felt even more uncomfortable. I hated awkward silences, but Tobi apparently found a way to break it.

Some of the food was launched across the table and hit Hidan in the face. Hidan jumped up and grabbed his food and launched it at Tobi, who ducked and it hit Kakuzu, who had gotten up to get more from the kitchen. Kakuzu glared before throwing some food at Hidan, who ducked and at the angle they were on, it hit Kisame. At this point, Itachi, Konan, Leader, and I moved away from the table to stand in the doorway by the kitchen. Sasori, who had come down at the noise, was unluckily in the line of fire. Everyone froze when he got hit.

"I live with idiots." said Sasori before he moved his hands, connected chakra strings to the table, and flipped the food onto the remaining fighters, so Deidara, Tobi, Hidan, Kakuzu, and Kisame. He then left, followed by Deidara, Kisame, Hidan, and Kakuzu, probably to shower. Itachi left to read, Leader left to his office, and Konan turned to me, and then back to the large mess.

"I'm going to have to clean this up, aren't I?" I asked. Konan nodded and I joined her in staring.

"Yes, yes you are… Do you want me to help?" asked Konan hesitantly. She received a nod. With this mess, I would need her help. It was still going to take a long time, food was on the ceiling, walls, chairs, floor, and the table was flipped over from Sasori. It would take forever.

FML

* * *

**Author's Note:**

** ...Boring authors note**

**Q-Who is your favorite Leaf ninja, if you can't name juts 1 then your top 5!**

** Ok i'll give you my favorie but not my top 5, my Leaf Ninja No.1 favorite is... Hinata**

** Hinata- I like Hinata because she's strong, pretty, and she's just so lovable, who wouldn't love her?**

**Verdigurl- 5. Iruka, 4. Tsunade, 3. Pakuun, 2. Gai, No.1 is Naruto!**

** I like Naruto but hate him in Naruto Shippuden Clash of Ninja Revolution 3 because in the final fight your again Deidara and he throws explosives at you while you have to get close to him to hit him. Then Deidara doesn't use chakra, which is unfair, and hes so much faster than you. I noticed that once you hit 1 bomb you hit them all. Then i need to beat him on level 3 to unlock Hidan and Kakuzu i think, i can't beat him! he kicks my ass everytime. I'm ranting about this because it frustrates me. **

** End of long ranting authors note**


	5. Theories Proven

**Author's Note:**

** Ok so i put out chapters really fast and so what I will now do is keep a schedule. I'm going to put out 1 chapter a week. Enjoy the chapter.**

* * *

Theories Proven

Think of it like this: we had dinner at 7pm, the food fight lasted until 7:30pm, and Konan and I were cleaning until 11pm. Those guys were so going to get it from both Konan and I!

Seriously it took us 3½ hours! After cleaning up that awful mess, I went to my room after saying goodnight to Konan and changed into what I came here in. The tank top was almost completely red from the blood on the back but that was ok. I wasn't actually completely sure if I went from world to world when I slept but if my theory was correct than yes, if I slept in this then I would end up in them when I got home.

I wasn't actually tired though which was weird. I sat in my bed staring at the ceiling for an hour. I kind of wished I had my IPod, whenever I needed to sleep and couldn't sleep I would listen to that but sadly, I didn't have it.

Staring at a ceiling is boring so I got up and started pacing around the room. When I got too bored to do that I sat on my bed facing the wall and banging my head into it hoping to knock myself out. When that didn't work I closed my eyes to meditate. I fell asleep while meditating. Wow, I should have tried that in the first place.

* * *

"Itami wake up!"

Why do I almost always wake up to yelling?

"Mmmm shut up." I mumbled before whoever had been yelling pulled me off my bed. I landed on my back which made my eyes fly open and I reached for my back. Remember, I had my back carved into by my lovely father. I think I left a red imprint of my back on the floor because of the blood on my tank top.

"Damn you Jack." I muttered as Chris pulled me up and they pulled my tank top up to reveal the bandages that I never took off. Jack grabbed Mr. Switch from my back pocket and gingerly cut the bandages from my back. He peeled them off from the blood that had crusted on my back and him and Chris stared in horror at my back.

"I-Itami." whispered Jack as he looked down at his feet. Chris was too horror stricken to look away.

"I'm fine, I wrapped it up. Now leave me alone so I can get to school." I said looking at the clock, I had overslept. It was 6:00am. That put me into action.

"Crap!" I yelped as I pushed past Jack and Chris, grabbed a dark red tank top and black ripped jean shorts, and ran into my bathroom. I rewrapped and cleaned my wounded back, and pulled my tank top on, the back showed the bandages. I then wrapped my arms up and pulled my fingerless black gloves on. I thought I looked pretty cool with the bandages showing. I took the necessary 5 minutes to put all my piercings in, and another 5 minutes to fix my hair in its usual style. I came out to find Jack and Chris waiting on my bed.

"Itami you shouldn't go to school like that." said Chris. He didn't call me Tami… That meant he meant it. They were serious.

"I'm fine, it's all bandaged up." I muttered, grabbing my backpack and swinging it on one shoulder.

"At least let us drive you." suggested Jack. Although, they both had driver's licenses they should not be trusted with cars. Ever. They found it fun to go over the speed limit and make short stops and dangerous turns.

"No, it's more dangerous to be in a car with one of you driving." I pointed out; they both looked at each other.

"We'll be careful!" pleaded Chris. Why did they want to drive me so badly?

"Fine." I groaned, just wanting them off my back. I honestly didn't want to drive with them, but what could I do?

We walked out to Jack and Chris's shared car. It was old and beat up from them crashing it, so many times. I briefly wondered if it even worked, 'cause it didn't look like it would. I was pushed into the back by Jack, and Chris took the wheel with Jack in the shot gun seat. Jack started the car and some ominous noises came from the engine before the car started. Chris muttered something I couldn't hear before he backed from the driveway.

The ride to school was one I would never forget. Chris ignored my yelling as he sped at least 20 over the speed limit. Luckily he was an expert at dodging cars so we didn't crash, but came close to crashing at least 5 times. Each time I turned a shade paler. Jack was laughing like a madman and sticking his head out the window like a dog, if we weren't going so fast I bet people would have looked at him like he was crazy, but we went too fast for them to see clearly.

We made it to school and I ran from the death trap and ran into school. I was late and I wanted to get to class. I ran into the attendance office, slipped the attendance lady 10 dollars and she 'forgot' to process my lateness. She then handed me a slip and I ran to my first period class that was half over.

All through my first few periods I was nervously moving around, people were looking at my back suspiciously because the bandages were starting to show blood a little. By the end of the day I would have red bandages. When I cleaned the wound they must have reopened. Just fantastic.

Gym came and we were playing dodge bal. Apparently my blunder in volleyball put Ms. Arson in a good mood, and was letting us play dodge ball. Of course I was being forced to play on the girl's side seeing as Ms. Arson was a sadistic cruel woman who might have wanted my back to open again. You see in dodge ball, the girls can't throw other than me but they dodge easily. Most guys can throw but can't dodge, so I was the target, Sky was also a target but they didn't all throw at her.

So when the whistle blew, I hid behind Sky. The guys of course all aimed at her and we both jumped in different directions. Josh got Sky out by being the only one who didn't throw at us. Well there goes my human shield.

I dodged more balls and hid behind other girls who were pelted by lots of balls. TI continued this until I was the only one left, uh oh. I ran around like the other girls when they panic hoping Ms. Arson would figure out I'm injured. Of course then I had to trip and fall. I was then pelted by a few dozen balls.

I think everyone besides me started panicking when blood started seeping from my back onto the floor. I was kind of just laying there in pain. Josh and Sky, bless them, helped me to the nurse again. The nurse stared at my back questioningly.

"I was mugged." I lied; it was a poor excuse seeing as we didn't live near any big gangs or dangerous neighborhoods.

"Mm hm, check in with me everyday, ok Hun?" asked the nurse receiving a nod. I liked the nurse; she was a sweet elderly woman with graying strawberry blonde hair and green eyes. You know those nurse hats that are really big with a cross on it that they wore years ago? Well to be funny our nurse wears one of those. Scratch the like, I love our nurse. I'm here to often, so she knows me.

"Now I called your brothers, they're going to pick you up." she said leaving me on my stomach on the bed thing in the nurse's office. I counted the minutes until my death, which means until my brothers came to pick me up. Them picking me up meant that I was going to get a ride in the death trap they called a car again.

"My poor Tami!" cried Jack as the nurse's door opened and Jack ran in with Chris following him. Drama queens, the both of them.

I sat up, and Jack started talking too fast for me to comprehend anything he said. So I ignored him and stood up. Chris grabbed my backpack and slapped a hand over Jack's mouth.

"Dude shut up, you're annoying the nurse and Tami." said Chris as he dragged Jack out with me following slowly. We got in the car and I warily eyed Chris as he got into the driver's seat. The speed limit was 45; we were going 50, not too bad. We were usually somewhere around the 70's. When we got home Jack helped me up to my room while Chris got me something to eat seeing as how I missed breakfast running out with them.

They left me alone for most of the day, only coming up every once in a while to check up on me. I was already in my pajamas with my piercings out when dinner came. I ate with the family, it was an awkward silence and I barely ate because my dad was glaring at me the entire time.

When I went back to my room I stared in the mirror at myself. I so felt different…

It wasn't pain or anything, I just felt… different. I can't explain what felt different though, it was weird. I stopped looking after a moment because something grabbed my hair.

"Bitch." growled my dad as he slammed my face into the mirror. He then pushed me back and I tripped over something and fell cracking my head on the corner of my desk. Everything went black.

* * *

My head hurt. I preferred waking up to yelling over this. I tried to sit up but pain ripped through my head and I stayed down. I sat there for who knows how long until the door I my room opened.

"Shit, un." I heard, it sounded like Deidara. I heard them come over and lift me up. Something touched the back of my head and I gasped in pain, it hurt so much!

"Better…Konan…know….do…un." was all I heard as they left. Everything felt funny, but what I felt the most was pain. I don't know what happened until Deidara came back with Konan, I think.

"What…..her?" I heard Konan, I think, ask. Why was my hearing all funny? My head was lifted again and my head's pain was beginning to numb. When the pain was cleared something cold and damp was placed on the back of my head. It felt nice. Something was wiped around my ears and everything seemed so much clearer.

"So do you know what happened, hm?" asked Deidara. I can't really remember, I remember school, then coming home, an awkward dinner, going upstairs and staring in the mirror, and then nothing.

"From the looks of it her head was smashed into a sharp corner, of maybe a table." said Konan. I opened my eyes and Konan and Deidara were talking next to me.

"Itami, are you awake? Can you understand us?" asked Konan when she noticed I was awake.

"Y-Yeah, w-what happened?" I asked reached my arm up to rub my head only for Konan to smack it away.

"Deidara came in because you weren't up yet and it's almost 6:30am and he found you lying on your bed with your pillow around your head soaked with blood. Your face was covered in blood too. What happened?" asked Konan and I tried to pull myself up in a sitting position. Konan helped me up.

"I-I don't know." I said trying harder to remember. My dad probably came up and knocked me out with something, he usually came up after dinner.

"Whatever hit you must have made you lose some of your memory, what's the last thing you remember?" asked Konan as she went through a bag and pulled out some bandages.

"Going to sleep." I said and she nodded before helping me to my feet and walking me into my bathroom where she washed my head and hair in the sink. It burned, the water hitting my poor still bleeding head. It has occurred to me that I bleed a lot and I must have more blood than I thought because I lose a lot of blood. When Konan was finished rinsing my head she washed the blood off my face and then wrapped my head up with the bandages.

"Better?" she asked before letting me stand on my own. I nodded but quickly stopped when pain rocketed through my head. She led me to the kitchen where I just watched her make the food.

All of a sudden I felt a random prick on my arm. I looked and there was a small dot of blood near where the hospital IV had been. I stared at it in confusion. What…?

But before I could ponder it more, Konan finished breakfast so we all ate and then I went back to my room seeing as I was injured. I stared blankly at the wall the entire day, it was boring but I made it. Then when night fell, I fell asleep easily.

* * *

I woke up to a beeping. Beep, beep, beep. It was irritating. I looked around and noticed I was in a hospital room, I could tell because it was the same one from last time. I pressed the nurse's button again and in a few minutes, the same nurse as last time appeared. Serious Déjà vu.

"Hello Miss Duncan, I see you're awake. How are you feeling?" asked the nurse.

"Good." I said, I was confused. But I also had another theory proven. The theory was that on Earth I still had my body, but I also had a body in the Naruto world. Whatever happens to one body happens to another, so that's why I felt a prick on my arm from the IV and why when I was knocked out from hitting my head on Earth I woke up with a head injury in the Naruto world. It made sense!

"Hey nurse, when can I leave?" I asked and the nurse looked at her clipboard.

"After a doctor gives you an exam." said the nurse before walking out. Damn… maybe I can escape like my grandma did.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

** Ok so once again, keeping the same question because i put out updates way too fast. **

**Q-Who is your favorite Leaf ninja and is you can't pick just one, your top 5.**

**Ok so my No.1 favorite is Hinata, my second favorite is definately Tsunade, she kicks ass!**


	6. Hot Spring Tension

**Author's Note:**

** I didn't die! I just took too long to write this chapter and then... i had other things to do like fishing, going to a concert, fireworks, etc. So yeah, this chapter took longer than i originally planned. **

** Oh and in previous chapters i noticed that sometimes the line that i used to seperate time skips and stuff wouldn't show up so if theres a time shift with no line... pretend theres a line there... because there was one... its just missing.**

** What is up with the lines? I keep having to come back and redo them! It's so frustrating! **

** Enjoy the chapter!**

* * *

"You would be a good ninja Itami." noted Konan as I turned around angrily and threw a knife at Hidan. It landed in-between his eyes.

In truth I was pissed off because the doctors in the hospital are idiots. They weren't letting me go see my mom who was on the same floor! Now I don't like my mom much, but I do care for her. I also just want to get out of that damn hospital room! So I was taking my anger out on Hidan who was pissing me off more by ranting about Jashin-sama to Kakuzu who I knew wasn't listening. I had watched him put earplugs in, lucky bastard.

"What the hell!" yelled Hidan as he pulled the knife from his forehead and turned to me.

"Shut the hell up Hidan, you're distracting us from washing the dishes." I said before turning back to the sink. Konan had started helping me with chores since she never really got out of the base, unless it was to go shopping for food with me. In the Naruto world I was allowed to walk around with just bandages on my head and Konan usually followed me around helping so I had an escort in case of another injury. I liked it so much more than the hospital, I was actually allowed to walk around and I didn't need a damn IV! Or doctors that wouldn't shut up! The IV didn't even do anything, unlike the doctors,; I don't even know why I was still in the hospital because I know I aced the physical the doctor gave me from the look on his face when I was done. Hidan interrupted my rant on the hospital.

"Fuck you." muttered Hidan before he threw the knife back at me, luckily Konan had been watching and caught it before it impaled me in the back of my already injured head.

"Watch it she's already injured!" scolded Konan who had a threatening look in her eye. She was like the big sister I never had… I wish I had an older sister like Konan; maybe I could kidnap her back to my world. But wait, then who would stop Hidan from sacrificing me?

In the base Konan was the peace keeper. Fights usually interrupted between Deidara and Tobi, Deidara and Sasori, Hidan and Deidara, Hidan and Kakuzu, Hidan and Kisame, Deidara and Kisame, Hidan and Tobi, Kisame and Tobi, Hidan and me, Deidara and me, Sasori and me, and sometimes Kakuzu and me, but it was rare to see Kakuzu fight me since I was already injured.

With the fights it was usually Deidara, me or Hidan who made the first attack seeing as how we were the most violent. I was taking out my anger through the violence, Deidara was venting steam after having to listen to Tobi, and Hidan... Well, he just liked hitting/maiming people. Whenever Tobi was involved though, it was always the other person who attacked first, the morning wake up call for everyone but me, was Deidara trying to explode Tobi.

Usually Konan was up with me too... I usually ended up fighting Deidara after breakfast too since his bombing left a huge mess I had to clean in the morning so I would throw a few knifes at him and he would tackle me and I would bite him and it would all go downhill from there. Deidara saw it as a play fight since I was already injured and not that much of a threat…I'll get him back for it though.

When I bring my tazer here he'll be in trouble.

"Kakuzu can I please have some money?" asked Konan snapping me out of my reverie. I realized I was washing the last dish and I had been for the past 5 minutes. I quickly dried it and put it away before wandering over to Konan trying to figure out what she was doing.

"No." said Kakuzu after Konan pulled out his earplugs and asked again.

"Why not? I want to take Itami and go to the hot springs, I haven't been there in ages and it could help Itami heal faster!" complained Konan. Kakuzu sighed and looked up from the money he was counting.

"If you want her to heal, use your Medical Ninjutsu." said Kakuzu and Konan glared daggers into his head. I decided to help; I kind of wanted to go to some hot springs too.

"Please Kuzu-Kun?" I asked with my usual emotionless voice causing Konan to giggle and Kakuzu to look up and glare at me. I started to use my puppy eyes on him. Kakuzu glared for a moment before looking down at his money again.

"No." he said with some annoyance in his voice, it was working! I think... Konan was watching intently, probably taking notes on my expression since my expression was usually the same, a straight face with the occasionally scowl or twitch of an eyebrow. I started pouting and Kakuzu looked up again. He glared harsher and I saw his eye twitch and he looked back down at his money again.

"No Itami, it won't work on me." I gave him a scowl causing Konan to giggle. Then I started emanating cute again, I learned puppy eyes from Jack, you can't say no damn it! Kakuzu looked up at me with more annoyance in his face and when he saw me, he stared for a moment.

Big mistake.

Kakuzu sighed before going through his money quickly, pulling some out, counting that stack and then the larger stack and he handed Konan the smaller stack.

"Fine, you can go, but that's all I'm giving you." said Kakuzu and I smirked in triumph, Konan did a little happy dance as she counted the money.

"Great! Come on Itami, we have enough for the inn and the _good_ hot springs." cheered Konan as she left to pack. I quickly went to my room and packed too, it was then I realized that Konan would no doubt see my scars at the hot springs. Oh crap.

She was smart, like smarter than Sasori. She wouldn't fall for my lie, and she also wouldn't let me go by just saying 'It's a hard topic' no she would continue to try to get it out of me. I had to do some serious thinking.

Konan was a fast packer, because by the time I had even started gathering my things Konan arrived with her things in a scroll. I, unfortunately, hadn't been taught how to put things in a scroll yet. Konan was probably going to teach me later.

Konan went through my things and packed my clothes, she put my tunics and shorts in a scroll before handing me my tank top and shorts I left here. Yes, I was wearing that annoying uniform and yes, I had to knock Hidan back a few times with a series of sharp objects. He got the message after a while. I also added something to the uniform; I bandaged most of my torso and upper legs since I had more of my scars there. I changed out of the uniform and into the tank and shorts.

Konan raised an eyebrow at my hospital gown; whenever I would get here in my sleep I would change and put it in my sadly empty pajama draw before changing into my uniform. Then at night I would put it back on so that in the hospital if someone checked on me my clothes wouldn't randomly change in front of them. I had yet to know what exactly happened when I woke up and my clothes changed, I was guessing they just faded and changed shape, I had been meaning to put my phone down by my bed and take a video of it but then I realized that since no nurses had commented on it that it only happened when I went to sleep in each world that it would change! It must only be injuries and pain that would go at the exact moment because it's an actual change to my body.

Konan sealed my things in a scroll, including the hospital gown after realizing I had nothing else to sleep in and we left. The walking might I say was annoying. Konan was faster than me and kept going far ahead before realizing how slow I was because I wasn't a ninja like her.

"We really need to give you some ninja skills, like basic Taijutsu, maybe some Ninjutsu and Genjutsu, ooh and Kisame could teach you Kenjutsu; it would be awesome if you learned how to use a sword. I could try and teach you how to fight with paper like I do too! Itachi could teach you Genjutsu, I bet Zetsu could teach you about poisons and plants, speaking of Zetsu you haven't met him yet. He doesn't normally stay in the base. When you meet him you'll know its him though, he might try and eat you though so we're going to need to give you basic defense if you want to meet him and train with him. I wonder if Sasori would mind teaching you about puppets too, as long as you don't turn yourself into a puppet too." Konan was ranting about teaching me ninja techniques. I had actually been practicing with kitchen knives and it turns out I have good aim. Hidan was my usual target.

No sympathy for him!

"It would be nice." I said but I was ignored as she continued ranting about all the different kinds of Jutsu, Juinjutsu, Kinjutsu, Fuinjutsu, Senjutsu and loads more. If you don't know what they are then you're with me, Konan was talking too fast for me to understand what she was saying about each one. I do know Kinjutsu are forbidden techniques though. I know the basics that you hear about more often, Genjutsu, Taijutsu, Ninjutsu, Kenjutsu, Dojutsu, and the occasional Kinjutsu. That was it, I eventually tuned her out and watched the clouds from in-between the trees.

When we got to the hot springs and inn I could tell it was a nice place. The people there had expensive looking clothes and when Konan and I passed in our clothing, they stared at us. Konan had a simple low cut black top with a fishnet top covering the rest of her chest. Then she had simple dark pants and her ninja sandals. I was wearing a tank top, shorts, was covered in bandages, and had ninja sandals.

We looked out of place, to say the least.

Konan pulled me to the reception desk where she got us a two bed bedroom and a pass to the hot springs. We left our things in our room and went to the hot springs. We undressed in the changing rooms, and walked to an empty spring on the girl's side. One side was boy's one side was girls. You could still see the doors to each hot spring from each side, but it was way harder to see the actual people inside the hot springs.

Konan and I slid into the water with our towels still around us before sliding them off and submerging to our necks. I went down to my chin, partially because I had scars still visible, but ostly because the water felt nice. It was warm, and made my poor body feel relaxed.

"So, let's have girl talk. Who do you like?" asked Konan slinking closer. Truthfully, no one. I was hoping to avoid that with the Akatsuki, seeing as I wasn't from this world. I wasn't actually sure if I even had chakra, I might because if I didn't someone probably would have picked up on it. Frankly though, that's just a theory.

"No one, and don't say I'm lying 'cause I'm not." I said and Konan pouted.

"Awe c'mon! You and Deidara would be cute together, or maybe you and Sasori, or you and Itachi, or maybe you and Tobi, actually no, you wouldn't look good with Tobi." Konan chattered on and on, but I was making a face by the time she said Itachi. I had something against the Uchiha clan; it was probably because I hated Sasuke.

Itachi doesn't seem too fond of me either though, so were both on even ground.

"Well now what should we talk about?" asked Konan when she realized that she wasn't going to get anywhere. That was when we both heard something. We turned to the noise to see two holes in the fence…

Konan and I looked at each other and nodded thinking the same thing: peeper.

We both grabbed our towels and walked over to the hole. Konan jumped over it with me and we found the pervert… Should I be surprised it was Jiraiya? He realized Konan was a ninja… and he made a run for it with Konan throwing paper shuriken at him. When he was gone we went back to the hot spring.

Of course when we got back in the water, Konan noticed a scar I had on my shoulder that was new, it was the one from my father stabbing me with a knife from a week ago.

"Itami what's that?" she asked and I sunk more into the water.

"What's what?" I asked and she pulled me up a little and looked at the scars on my shoulders. She turned me around and looked at the scars on my back. She then grabbed for my arms but I held them away, I didn't want Konan to see my arms. They were from self abuse; I didn't want her to see them. She sighed and let me sit back down in the water.

"Where'd you get all those scars, Itami?" asked Konan. I looked up at the sky and noticed the sun was setting.

"Do you have to know? I would rather not say anything, it's a sour topic." I said and Konan sighed.

"I would like to know, you're my only girl friend and I want to protect you. You seem to get random injuries; Sasori said it happened when he was bringing you back, you randomly started bleeding. Then you got a head wound. What's hurting you Itami?" asked Konan and I sighed and buried my face into my hands. Konan took this as an opportunity to grabbed my hands and look at my arms, she then saw them.

"Itami…" said Konan, I grabbed my arm back and sank more into the water; I wish I were the water at that moment. Then Konan wouldn't have seen my scars or be mad at me.

"Itami, why? Why are those scars there, why would you hurt yourself?" she questioned and a tear fell from the side of my eye and I looked up at the fresh stars that could barely be seen.

"Just leave it alone Konan, maybe I'll tell you one day but today isn't the day. I'm not ready to talk about it." I pulled away, and sat in a different corner of the hot spring.

We went back to the room in silence.

We went out to dinner and when we got back, I changed into the hospital gown and slid into my bed. And with no further ado, I changed worlds, from Naruto to Earth.

* * *

I hate waking up in the hospital room, the machine is constantly beeping and the room almost blinds me because of all the white in it. I hated it, I hated the nurses too, and the doctors, and just the entire hospital.

When I woke up I felt better than ever though, I guess Konan was right, the hot spring did help me heal. I looked at the clock and noticed it was 9am, Konan and I went to sleep late because we went out to dinner and then got held up because of some unwanted men. Konan went ninja on them, it was entertaining to watch them run away with the paper following them.

"Good morning Miss Duncan!" said a nurse cheerfully as she entered, she was an annoying nurse, always cheerful, never dreary.

"Can I leave yet?" I asked, my head was pretty much healed but they won't let me leave! The nurse looked at a clip board in her hands.

"Mm, you're allowed to leave today actually." she said and with that I jumped up forgetting about the IV, did you know tugging on IV's hurt? I didn't.

Now I do.

"FUCK!" I yelled as the nurse ran over and fixed the IV I dragged half out of place and gave me a good amount of pain medication.

Then the nurse took it out, (why did she put it back in when she was just going to take it out?), and let me change into some dark blue shorts and a dark purple long sleeved shirt with dark blue rose designs on it.

Once I fixed my hair and walked out, I looked like a visitor. Now I could leave now without having Jack and Chris pick me up. That would be nice.

I slipped out and walked to the elevator but then realized this was my only chance to see my mom so I turned around and asked the desk where my mom's room was. I then left for that room after the nurse told me.

My mom did not look good. After a week she still had breathing tubes but when I walked in her eyes moved to me showing she was awake and aware of what was going on. I walked over to my mom and peered down at her.

"Hey Mom, it's me Itami. I came to visit since I'm leaving the hospital today, ha it's funny. I get hurt a lot don't I? Well this visit needs to be short since I need to leave before Jack and Chris get here or else I may be back because of another accident." I said and we stared at each other in silence for a good 10 minutes. Then I left silently. As I walked back to my house from the hospital my mind wandered.

Why was I going from world to world? Was it the car accident? Or maybe it was that wish I made the night I first went there. But I wished for a better life… how is this better? I'm getting injured even more; I'll figure it out eventually.

I stopped at a park for a little bit and sat on the swing staring at my feet. A good amount of time passed and a few kids would stop and stare at me before running away. They were afraid to come over to the swings because I was there.

I probably looked dead.

My eyes looked tired like usual, even before my nightly world change I would look dead, then I was pale, I was paler than before because of the lack of sun from the hospital. My skin was soft and clean from the hot springs. That was a plus I guess.

I left the park when it started getting dark. I got home at dark. When I entered the house I found Jack and Chris in the living room on the Wii playing one of my Naruto games. I wouldn't let them touch my other Naruto games for the Xbox and stuff. They noticed me come in.

"Itami? You're back! Why didn't you wait for us to pick you up?" asked Jack and I raised an eyebrow, he realized why after a moment of thinking.

"Oh, yeah…" he said before the game announced 'Fight Over!' with Chris as the winner, no wonder Jack lost. He was playing as Naruto, who sadly is horrible in the video games. I took a seat next to Jack and grabbed Jack's controller.

"I'm going to kill you Chris." I said as I picked to play as Tsunade. Chris went with Kakuzu; I unlocked all the characters in the game because I loved all the characters, except Sasuke, I disliked him, but I still unlocked him.

The fight started with Chris coming at me shaking the Wii remote going for a regular weak combo. I jumped up and then game down on top of him before I stared randomly shaking my Wii remote and hitting A. Then when he was knocked back I used my special attack. I love how Tsunade says 'You tick me off' before hitting them. Then I threw and explosive kunai at him to finish him off. The familiar yell of 'Fight Over' came from the TV, it was normally two rounds but I set it to just one round with unlimited time. I handed the remote to Jack and looked to Chris who was staring in shock at the TV.

"Girl power, never underestimate the girls." I said before going up to my room. I sat down at my desk and stared at my drawings of the Akatsuki for a while.

Then, when I was called down for dinner I ignored them and changed into a large white shirt from Chris and dark blue booty shorts, these would have to do since I didn't have my hospital gown. Konan would be suspicious but there was nothing I could do.

* * *

When I returned to the world of Naruto, Konan was still sleeping. I quickly changed out of my clothes and hid them in the scroll that Konan had briefly taught me how to use on the walk here.

It was simple really, put the thing you want to seal on the circle in the middle. Then make a few hand signs and place your hands on both sides of the circle and the items go into the scroll. Well that was the easy small scroll I had, there were more advanced ones that carried larger weapons and stuff, like the one Tenten had on her back.

I nodded at the scroll before I noticed that from my hands were reddish hand prints. I looked at it confused, why were there handprints? Konan hadn't left handprints. I shrugged it off and closed the scroll hoping Konan wouldn't notice when we got back to the base. If you were perceptive then you would notice the handprint looked like blood, but only if you were looking closely.

When Konan woke up we left, but not before stopping in a little shop they had. I looked at the movies; they were mainly action movies, like I saw the movie from the 1st Naruto movie, the one with the rainbow chakra and stuff. When Konan came over from looking at the different weapons they had, why did they have weapons when it was a place for rich non-ninja people? I don't know. Anyway when Konan came over she asked if I wanted to get one.

"Want to get one? Everyone at the base has been wanting to watch a movie but we've seen all the ones we have at the base." said Konan, things had been tense between us ever since she saw my scars. I guess she was mad at me for harming myself and not telling her why.

"Ok." I said grabbing one, we weren't actually going to watch that movie; I was going to bring a movie from my world. I was going to get Jack to give me one of his movies, he liked the violent ones with gore and stuff….

I think the Akatsuki will like that.

The walk back to the base was awkward. Konan wasn't talking, and she talked the most out of everyone in the base. I was trying to make the tension less by daydreaming but sadly, it wasn't working. I looked to Konan, she seemed to be confused.

I guess she wanted to know why I cut but she also didn't want to stay mad but felt she had to. I would be confused to. I would tell her, but could I trust her? Would she still hate me after I told her?

"Konan…" I said quietly and Konan stopped to look at me.

"Yeah?" She seemed surprised I was talking to her.

"Do you really want to know?" I asked and Konan looked at her hands and sighed.

"You're my friend Itami, probably my best friend, I just want to help you." said Konan and we looked into each other's eyes. Her amber eyes showed that she really did want to help. I sighed, I could trust her.

"Abuse, my father is abusive. He stabbed me with knives, knocked me around, if it weren't for my brothers, I'd be dead. Then I was tortured back in my village by the others my age. I'm different; I look different, act different. Its torture, it's lonely. So I would cut myself, take away the emotional pain that I hole up inside myself. If you look carefully, the newest scar is almost healed completely; it's from 6 months ago." I said carefully, I had to explain it carefully. If I said something wrong then I could give something away about going from world to world. I made sure it I said everything past tense too, I didn't need to give away the fact it was still happening.

"Itami… I'm sorry. Sorry for getting mad at you for not telling me, it wasn't really my business but I'm glad you told me. I want to help you, in any way I can." said Konan hesitantly. I played with the bandages on my arms and we continued to walk in silence.

"Konan… I would like it… if you tried to help…." Konan looked over at me when I spoke.

"Good." said Konan and I looked up at the clouds.

"But… you can't really help something that's already been broken." With that I walked in front of Konan who had stopped. I felt her staring at my back. The silence wasn't peaceful, it wasn't awkward though. It was more of a sad or worried silence; you could feel the tension as we walked along. When we got back to the base, hopefully the tension would go away.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

** Chapter 6 was hard to write...**

** Anyway i went through the rules and guidelines again and i found out you're not supposed to do Q/A's, i've seen other people do it though so i'm not going to continue with it... but i'll still answer the last question.**

**1st-Hinata-She's awesome**

**2nd-Tsunade-She is strong, and badass**

**3rd-Kakashi-He's cool and has a Sharingan**

**4th-Neji-He has the Byakugan and deals with Team Gai, or Guy, but i prefer Gai. Dunno why. I love in the episode where Gai is giving a piggy back how Neji says in the Japanese sub "Oh hell no!" when Lee asks him to get on his back. I just find it funny for some reason.**

**5th-Shikamaru-He's smart an can use shadow techniques. Also i like the episode with Pakkun and Shikamaru.**

** That's it for my Top 5 Leaf Ninja**

**_Veeandreaheart_- 1-Shikamaru 2-Kiba 3-Rock Lee 4-Sakura, only in Shippuden, and 5 is Deidara.(He isn't in the Leaf village but he is awesome so i don't really care if he is part of the village or not.)**

**_Ichigo1508_- 1-Kakashi 2-Hinata 3-Naruto 4-Shikamaru 5-Tsunade**

**_Verdigurl_- 5-Iruka 4-Tsunade 3-Pakuun 2-Gai 1-Naruto**

** its hard to choose a favorite isn't it.**

** Again sorry this took sooooo long, it would have been longer had my trip not been canceled... my mom was supposed to be out of the hospital rehab/nursing home center thing by this time but sadly, she went back into the hospital. So all my plans and trips are canceled and my Summer will be boring. The good news about it though is that chapters will be written quicker.**

** Oh and i just wanted to put this in. I went fishing and the captain was putting the hooks on the lines when all of a sudden he goes "Awe shit!" and runs into the cabin. I looked inside the window and see him trying to pull a hook from his tongue, yes he go a hook to go straight through his tongue. So another crew member went in there, used plyers(?) to cut the hook and then push it through his tongue. When he came back out and someone asked if he was ok he replied with "Eh it's just like getting a piercing." and so, the good thing was he got a free piercing. The bad thing was it was probably very painful. When i retold this story later, the person said "A fish is probably laughing at him somewhere." End of story.**

** End of LONG Author's Note...Lucky You**


	7. The Problem with Blood

**Author's Note-**

** Yay chapter 7! Took me forever to write the beginning and then the rest, eh. Enjoy**

* * *

The Problem with Blood

The tension from the hot springs did in fact go away when we got back to the base.

Why you ask?

Because Konan left to help Leader with something and I got caught up in cleaning. Of course, cleaning can only help if the guys would stop leaving messes! A few days after we got back this happened.

I had just finished cleaning the living room with a smile, and I was in my damn uniform but that's ok because, like I said before, now it has shorts and some bandages.

"Hey Itami, un." I jumped and turned around sharply to come face to face with Deidara. Damn ninjas, they always sneak up on me.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"I wanted to tell you Hidan made the mess in the kitchen, yeah." he said. I walked into the kitchen and my jaw dropped, it looked like something exploded!

"Hidan did this?" I asked calmly even though inside I was seething with rage. Stuff was on the ceiling, I'm no ninja so how am I supposed to get on the ceiling!

"Yeah." said Deidara. It was at that moment that Hidan walked in and saw me.

"Hey bitch, shouldn't you be fucking cleaning?" he asked looking around the kitchen.

"You made the mess according to Deidara." I said.

"No I didn't!" said Hidan.

"Liar, un! You didn't cuss so that means you're lying, yeah!" yelled Deidara.

"Yeah well you fucking helped! You're the one who put a fucking bomb in my food!" yelled Hidan.

Hmmm….

So _that's_ why Deidara tried to get me to think it was Hidan. Clever. Sadly not planned enough to make it actually work.

"Ok then, here's what's going to happen." I said gaining the arguing men's attention.

"Since you guys made the mess and can get on the ceiling while I can't, one, or both of you will be cleaning this up with me." I said with my hands on my hips. Deidara and Hidan looked at each other.

"No way in hell am I going to fucking clean." said Hidan. I looked at Deidara. He had on a straight face.

"No, un." I did my puppy eyes and pouted.

"Please Dei?" I asked in a cute voice, well, cuter than my usual voice.

Deidara is weak, so he fell for it. Hehehe….

"Fine, un." he said as I grinned and handed him a rag.

"You clean the ceiling until it sparkles, Hidan, you clean the walls or else." I threatened pointing at the immortal.

"Or else what?" he asked.

"I'll cut off your head and pay Kakuzu not to sew it back on." I threatened.

"You can't fucking touch me, I'm too fucking fast for you." said Hidan. It was then I pulled Mr. Switch from my apron pocket and hurled it at Hidan hitting him in the neck.

"AH what the fuck!" he yelled pulling it out and making blood gush from his neck. He got blood on the floor but it's a small price to pay for stabbing Hidan.

"There, that proves I am perfectly capable of cutting off your head." I said with a smirk.

"Jashin damn it!" yelled Hidan trying stop the blood from gushing out. I heard chuckling and turned to see who dared chuckle at us. It was Kisame.

"Hey Kisame want to help clean?" I asked sweetly.

"No." he said still chuckling before grabbing something from the fridge and leaving.

"Damn." I muttered under my breath as I noticed Hidan had snuck away.

"Jashin damn ninjas." I muttered as I looked to Deidara who looked amused.

"You, clean the ceiling now." I said while grabbed a mop and started on the floor. After about half an hour of cleaning, I thought of something.

"Deidara."

"Yeah, un?"

"Why did you put a bomb in Hidan's food?"

"...No reason, yeah."

"You all give me hell." Deidara chuckled as he jumped down from the clean ceiling. I finished the floor and turned to Deidara.

"Can you get the higher walls?" I asked looking at how high the walls were and the fact that I couldn't reach them.

"Fine, un. But you owe me one, yeah." muttered Deidara going up. Of course I do. I'll have to make Hidan do it since he was supposed to get the walls.

We finished the walls quickly and I got us something to drink from the fridge. As we were drinking the kitchen door opened and Konan came in, grabbed my arm, and pulled me out leaving Deidara slightly confused. She led me to the training room before letting go and turning to me. I noticed Sasori and Kisame in the corner.

"Ok, we're going to teach you about chakra!" said Konan gesturing for Sasori and Kisame to come over. As they walked over she turned to me.

"Sasori and Kisame are here because Kisame's sword eats chakra and Sasori is skilled in chakra control." explained Konan.

"Chakra is the resulting form of energy when two other forms of energy are mixed together. The two energies are referred to as "physical energy" and "spiritual energy". Physical energy is collected from the body's cells and can be increased through training, stimulants, and exercise. Spiritual energy is derived from the mind's consciousness and can be increased through studying, meditation, and experience." lectured Konan; ok I understood the basics of chakra.

"So what am I going to be doing?" I asked.

"You are going to meditate while we sense your chakra, you have very low chakra right now, barely any at all it seems." said Konan. Eh it's better than cleaning. Also, what do you expect? I'm not from the ninja world!

I sat down and Konan positioned me in a meditating form. I meditated for about an hour and nothing changed. Kisame was half asleep, possibly completely asleep and Sasori looked bored as he started playing around with his puppet strings. Even Konan, who had been enthusiastic about this, was folding paper with a bored expression.

"I don't think I have chakra, or at least not enough to do anything with." I said breaking the silence.

"You do have some; it's just hard to sense. You wouldn't be alive without chakra anyway." said Konan not looking up from the folding she was doing.

"Well I can't do it, I've been at this for at the very least an hour." I was frustrated internally, still calm on the outside though.

"Keep trying." said Konan. I sighed and went back to trying to feel the damn chakra I'm supposed to have; I doubt I have it because I'm not from somewhere where there is chakra.

"I'm telling you, this is pointless!" I shouted uncharacteristically trying to get her to let me leave.

"Itami, it will take time." said Konan. Kisame, who was awakened by my frustrated shout, groaned.

"She obviously doesn't have enough chakra to focus it." he said.

"You might be right; hey doesn't Deidara have a scope? Maybe it can see chakra!" said Konan. Sasori, who had been quietly listening, decided to point something out to us.

"Why not train her in Taijutsu and then Itachi can use his Sharingan to see her chakra flow?" suggested Sasori. We all stared.

"And you didn't point this out earlier!" cried Konan, even Kisame looked mad. I was still frustrated.

"Train her in Taijutsu to get her chakra moving while I get Itachi." said Kisame as he left. Konan looked at me before throwing a punch at my face.

"Eh!" I yelped jumping back. I stood still for a moment, before shrugging. "Weapons?" I asked.

"Sure." said Konan pulling out some paper shuriken; I think that should count as Ninjutsu. I pulled out Mr. Switch, whom I had gotten back when I found him lying on the floor in Hidan's blood. I made a defensive stance and waited for the shuriken. They came at me all at once. I made a good decision. I hit the deck. They flew over me and I jumped up to face Konan.

She was unfairly using Ninjutsu; the shuriken behind me turned around and ended up slicing through my arm making blood start to pour on the ground. Konan gasped and ran over. When I bleed, I really bleed. I think I have more blood than most people, but where do I keep it?

Hm….

Konan interrupted my thoughts.

"Are you ok Itami?' asked Konan looking at the slashes on my arm. I was happy it was my left arm and not my right, I was a righty and those shuriken cut deep. Moving the muscles in my arm hurt a lot.

"Hey why's she bleeding?" asked Kisame coming in.

"Konan cheated." I said.

"How, we agreed on weapons." she said in her defense.

"Yeah but you used Ninjutsu! The paper I dodged completely turned around and hit me." I accused. Itachi had his Sharingan activated and was staring at the blood dripping from my arm.

"So what's with her chakra?" asked Konan trying to change the subject.

"I know why she's having difficulty with it." said Itachi.

"Why?" asked Konan and I.

"Chakra has its own separate circulatory system that regulates through the body. It has 361 chakra points." explained Itachi.

"What are you getting at?" I asked. Ok we know this, why are you explaining it?

"You don't have a chakra circulatory system, your chakra, is in your blood. Your blood is infused with your chakra so you cannot control your chakra without learning how to extract it from your blood." explained Itachi. Kisame was openly gaping at the revelation.

"So, I have no chakra circulatory system and instead my chakra is in my blood?" I asked for confirmation.

"Yes, you have the spiritual and physical energy mixing together but it is happening in your blood and not a separate system. This is also why you seem to have more blood than normal, your chakra helps multiply your blood cells." said Itachi. Konan, Kisame, and I listened with fascination. Even Sasori looked amazed.

"That has never been heard of before." pointed out Sasori.

"Well, my village was a bit strange." I said. My town was the weirdest place you could be, at least to these ninja. To me, not so much. Sasori narrowed his eyes at me. Then we all remembered my arm. It was gushing blood.

"Can someone please help?" I asked calmly looking at my arm.

"Let me." said Konan as her hands turned green and my skin started to knit itself together.

"I'm afraid I can't really do much, I'm not very advanced. Only smaller wounds and headaches." said Konan, yeah those shuriken almost cut my arm off. I glared at my arm, this was not good. Ever since my visit to the school nurse with my back she's been making me come every day and every day I have a new bruise or cut from living with ninja and my family. So the nurse was suspicious and this one looked like someone tried to cut off my arm!

"There you go." said Konan and I snapped out of my thoughts and noticed she had been bandaging my arm.

"Thanks." I said as I moved my fingers a bit to find that it still was painful. Damn shuriken, they cut almost to my bone!

"Hey it's almost time for dinner." said Kisame and Konan and I left for dinner. At least there wasn't any tension between us.

After dinner I went to my room and sat on my bed staring at the wound. It was already bleeding through its bandages.

"I'm so screwed. The nurse will definitely see this and I already have her suspicious from the injuries I get at home and here. How can I explain this? I've already used every excuse I could think of." I muttered looking at my arm. I grabbed a bandage and redid my arm.

"I can't wait to wake up to my own world and have questions from my brothers as to why my bed is probably full of blood and how I pretty much cut off my arm off." I muttered angrily before jumping up onto my bed. I'm talking to myself. I'm going insane! Or I'm just really confused and worried. Let's go with the latter.

* * *

"Itami show me that arm." growled the nurse who happened to be very intimidating. Yes I was in the nurse's office for my daily check over; the nurse has been very suspicious ever since the back accident about a week or so ago.

"No thanks." I said backing up against the wall. She advanced on me and I started sliding down the wall towards the door. The nurse hit the handicap switch making the door close, damn handicaps.

It's their fault that I'm now trapped.

The nurse tackled me noticing I was lost in thought. We landed on the floor where she pulled up my sleeve showing my entire left arm was in bloody bandages. She pulled them off and looked at my bleeding arm that you might be able to see the bone from.

"Itami." she said calmly.

"I can explain!" I said quickly. She looked at me and waited for my explanation.

"Well we were having a good time at dinner last night when someone thought it was a good idea to juggle knives. Then the knifes slipped and flew at me and so, I now have very interesting injuries." I said so believable right? Yeah no, but I've used up all the good excuses I had.

"I believe you." she said sarcastically.

"Itami, I think I know what's going on." Maybe you think you know what's going on and you can probably guess something right but I doubt you will ever guess the full truth.

"You're being abused." No really? What does the bitch scar on my back say to you? Yes it healed and it scarred! Seriously, now I can't wear anything that shows my back because bitch is scarred on my back.

"Mm I'm right aren't I?" asked the nurse.

"No." I said. If she did something about it, it would crush Jack and Chris. We would be split up. And with my mom just coming home from the hospital, it will make it worse. I can't do that to them.

"Denial." said the nurse.

"Not denial, accidental injuries. I'm clumsy at home and my brothers are more clumsy then a drunk." I said. Part of that was true I wasn't clumsy but my brothers were.

"Fine, but I will be looking into this and I will call home!" warned the nurse. I was in some serious shit.

Later that day when I got home I warily looked around. The nurse called home and my mom can't get up to the phone yet even though she was back from the hospital. So that left my father to answer the phone, and because Jack and Chris had left earlier to go fishing, I was in danger.

I used some ninja moves that I had learned from Deidara and Sasori to stealthily move to the trapdoor, pull down the stairs, climb them, and close them. I felt satisfied, until I turned around.

"Shit." the word hadn't even left my mouth before a fist connected with my face sending me flying on my ass on the trapdoor. Boy was I glad I got to close the trapdoor or else that would have been painful. I did a backwards roll to avoid a knife in my stomach. Yes, I was being attacked by my father and yes, he was drunk and one more thing to say yes to, yes he was pissed.

I was lucky and unlucky he was drunk. A good thing was if I hid his vision was off and he was slower but sadly when drunk he was stronger and was more vicious. I was in a life or death situation. This was another reason I carried around Mr. Switch, in case this happened.

The nurse made my death easier when she confiscated Mr. Switch from me today when she found him in my pocket. And I'm cornered so I can't reach any of my hidden weapons without getting a knife in my head. I warily watched before taking a Taijutsu stance I learned by watching Hidan and Kakuzu fight.

My dad raised the knife again and I made a 5 second plan. As he thrust the knife at me I ran forward and went to slide under him. His knife nicked my cheek because I hadn't ducked my head in time, but that's ok. I ran to my bookcase and pulled out a large book. I opened it to reveal it was hollow and had a large amount of closed switchblades in it. I pulled one out and flicked it out with a smirk.

My dad charged and I realized he had a knife similar to a butcher's thing. I want to know where he got it from but never mind that, I'm in danger. Instead of blocking the knife that would probably break my switch blade I dropped down and kicked out his legs. That was something I had learned from Konan. Then I jumped over him to escape but he grabbed my leg. I fell to the floor and I rolled to avoid him cutting my foot off. I kicked his face before crawling to the trapdoor.

"Get back here." I heard, it was very hard to understand though because he slurred quite a bit. I opened the trapdoor when I felt a sharp and burning pain in my shoulder followed by heat. I yelled and looked to find his knife buried in my shoulder. Words that Kisame had given me after kicking my ass in a fight flashed through my mind

"Never turn your back on your enemy when he still has his weapon raised." Too late for that now. I flipped over and kicked my foot out connecting the toe of my combat boots to my dad's jaw. He fell back and I slid down the stairs. I pulled the knife from my shoulder and immediately regretted it. Blood started gushing out and it started dripping to the floor.

"Damn chakra!" I muttered running to the bathroom. I slammed open the door and opened the cabinet. I grabbed the roll of bandages and I locked the door. I sat on the edge of the bathtub and wrapped my shoulder. There was a puddle of blood in the bathtub when I finished. I smirked at myself in the mirror before washing my hands and leaving the room to hide in Jack's room. I had used the downstairs bathroom; I wonder if Jack and Chris will freak out when they see the puddle of blood? Probably will. I hid in Jack's room under his bed for the rest of the day until I heard Jack and Chris come back. Then I heard them open the bathroom door, probably Jack.

"FUCK!" I heard Jack yell before a crash and some yelling from Chris. I just realized I left the butchers knife in the bathroom too.

"Itami!" I heard Jack yell and run in here. He knows I usually hide in his room because it looks like there was an explosion in it, it was a mess.

"Here" I said, crawling out and wincing as my right shoulder, the one that had gotten knife in it hit the bed.

"Are you ok!" he asked as Chris came in.

"I'm fine, I just bleed a lot." I said as Jack and Chris sighed in relief.

"Why did you leave the blood and weapon in the bathroom?" asked Chris.

"I was pressed for time, I was afraid he was going to come down and break down the door." I said.

"Well he's not now, he's unconscious on the couch." said Jack hugging me.

"My poor baby sister!" he cried. I was only a few years younger than him, I was not a baby!

"Relax, oh and can I borrow a violent movie?" I said and Jack let go and went to the only organized thing in his room, his movie case. He selected one and handed it to me.

"Now I'll be upstairs, no dinner." I said leaving my two brothers.

When I got to my room I dropped the movie on my bed and changed into my pajamas with a large sweatshirt over it. I put the movie in the pocket and grinned, if it was in my pocket it was coming with me. When I fell asleep, I didn't expect what would happen when I woke up.

* * *

**Author's Note-**

** Would you count that as cliffhanger or foreshadowing? I find it both, what will she wake up to! Actually i already know, but YOU don't. Take your guesses and i would love to hear them. I love reviews, they make me smile and i read them to get ideas so please put your ideas down cuz i would love to hear them!**

** My summers been boring, my moms still in the hospital, she's been there since April, the doctors are not helping at ALL. My plans for this summer were already ruined because of her hospital visit, and both Lexi and me are sad form it. Boo. I'm ranting about it because it annoys me, the doctors are idiots! Althoguh in August i do have 2 parties with my cousins but its out of state so i might not be able to go... damn. This summer sucks and then next year is going to suck because i'm probably in honors again and then i have advanced art with a bitchy teacher.**

**End of Authoress's rant, lucky you**


	8. Secret No More

**Author's Note:**

** Chapter 8 of Insomnia, Secret No More. Enjoy this chapter.**

* * *

Secret No More

I opened my eyes and sat up with a grin on my face. I had been stabbed in the shoulder and my bed was sticky with blood, but I had brought a movie to entertain the Akatsuki with so there would be around 2 hours of someone not making a mess I would have to clean.

"You have some explaining to do." Oh shit, fuck, damn, crap, every cuss word you can think of. My blood ran cold as I slowly turned around to come face to face with…

Sasori.

"Eh heh heh you haven't been here all night have you?" I asked, my voice was abnormally high.

"I have been standing here since you entered your room last night and started talking to yourself, you should start explaining." said Sasori. Ooh boy, this is some serious shit. Also, how did I not notice him? And I am glad I changed in the bathroom.

"Well, do you want the full version or simple version?" I asked.

"Full."

"Ok well it all started around 2 weeks ago. I come from another world that is father advanced in technology here. We were in a car, something that moves us from place to place, when we crashed and I hit my head really hard and was knocked out. When I got back home after the hospital I was sitting on my bed and saw a star so I made a wish for my life to be better. My dad beats me and I hated my life. Then, I fell asleep. That was weird because I have insomnia and never fall asleep easily. I woke up in a forest, so I walked around until meeting you and Deidara. Of course you 2 brought me with you. At the inn, when my back started bleeding as I slept, was because my dad carved bitch into my back and whenever I get hurt it transfers bodies right away. When I change clothes they only change when I fall asleep, or so I think. Anyway, then I became your maid and stuff before my dad bashed my head in giving me that head injury. A few moments ago, my dad took a huge knife and stabbed me in the shoulder before I got away and woke up to you questioning me." I explained quickly. It took Sasori a few moments to process this.

"So you're telling me that you're not from this world?" he asked, I couldn't tell what he was thinking because his face wasn't betraying his emotions.

"Yes, and that is probably why my chakra is in my blood. My world has no ninja, no chakra, and is extremely different from this world." I said.

"Then how do you know about this world?" asked Sasori. Well, this is going to be a good one. I knew about ninja techniques and Sasori knew this, how was I going to explain this?

"…Uh in my world…. this world is a… TV show." I said. Sasori looked at me in disbelief before…

"So you know what's going to happen." It wasn't a question.

"Maybe…?" I said cautiously.

"You know what's going to happen." stated Sasori turning to leave. I tackled him and wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his torso. I was panicking.

"Don't tell anyone!" I wailed. Sasori stayed silent for a bit as I tightened my hold in case he tried to get me off.

"Fine." he said after a moment of silence.

"Thanks Sasori, it'll be our little secret." I said getting off him. He turned to me.

"But if I don't say anything, if any of us are in danger or are going to die, tell us." he said.

"Ok, you're going to die because Lady Chiyo and Sakura kill you after you get the One Tail. If you want to see exactly what happens I can bring in my IPod or cell phone because I have episodes downloaded on them and some of those episodes include all the deaths of the members and the entire fight that killed them." I said. He stared at me, speechless.

"Hey Sasori?" I asked.

"What?"

"When my clothes changed, what happened?" I was curious to know this.

"They shined for a minute and then they changed color before changing shape." said Sasori.

"Ok." I said and Sasori left. I wonder if he thinks I'm insane, probably. I changed into my maids outfit and made breakfast for the members. During breakfast Sasori was acting weird. I think Itachi, Deidara, and Kakuzu noticed but I'm not sure.

"Hey Danna, what's up, un? You're acting weird." said Deidara breaking the silence of eating. Damn you Deidara.

"Nothing." said Sasori.

"Bull shit." said Hidan.

"Ask Itami." I hate you Sasori. I really do.

"What's wrong with Sasori Itami, un?" asked Deidara.

"You have a better chance at getting the answer from a rock." I answered.

"But rocks don't talk Itami-chan." pointed out Tobi, he had been abnormally quiet recently.

"Exactly." I said taking a bite of my food.

"Tell me, un." said Deidara.

"No."

"Tell me, un!"

"Nope."

"Tell me, un!" I think I was frustrating him.

"Not a chance."

"Tell me!" said Deidara.

"What do you say?" I asked. Let me give him hope.

"Please tell me, un?" asked Deidara.

"Mmmm, still no." I said. And then crush his hope.

"Fuck you, un." said Deidara unhappily taking a bite of his food. That's not very nice.

"Do you really want to hear my response to that?" I asked. Kisame snorted, he knew what I would say and Hidan grinned because I got it from him.

"No not really seeing as you and Hidan share a vocabulary and mind, yeah." said Deidara.

"Well, then, we share a great mind." I said and Hidan high fived me, Hidan had been next to me.

"Just tell me Itami, un!" pleaded Deidara.

"Sasori make him shut up!" I said turning to said puppet.

"Why?" asked Sasori who was amused by our argument.

"Because you sent him on me and he's your partner." I reasoned. Sasori got up and left. Damn him.

"Tell me, un." Back to the argument.

"No."

"Why not, un?"

"It's a secret between Sasori and myself."

"Tell me, yeah."

"The answer is, and always will be, no."

"Go to hell, un." He was very frustrated.

"I will meet you there." I said and he glared at me.

"You two argue like a married couple." said Konan, her eyes read 'match making'. Shit. Although it was true, we got into a lot of various arguments before wrestling.

"No we don't." I said calmly. Deidara instead of staying calm like me, yelled.

"No we don't, un!"

"Where did you get that injury?" asked Itachi randomly. Damn he is perceptive, I had tried to make my bandages thicker but not noticable. Everyone looked at me and in return, noticed the bloody bandage on my shoulder. Oops it bled through, now I know how he figured out I was injured.

"And that is the secret, I'm leaving." I said before hurrying out of there. I ran into Sasori.

"Leader wants to see you." he said looking down at me, all the guys here were taller than me, all of them. And I was tall! Sasori and I walked to Leader's room where we walked in. Leader's shadowy figure was in the dark like usual.

"Sasori tells me that you are not form this world and know the future." he said. I turned to Sasori. He told!

"Bastard it was supposed to be our little secret!" I yelled hitting his arm.

"So it is true." muttered Leader.

"Err yes." I said with a small smile, I was really hoping to get out of here soon.

"You are now a member of Akatsuki, but you still cook because you're the only one who can. And you'll still clean with the help of Konan." he ordered.

"Can I ditch this outfit?" I asked gesturing to my maid outfit. I saw amusement in his eyes.

"Yes." I was jumping for joy.

"Hell yeah!" I said and I was openly showing my happiness, ever since I got here I've been more expressive. I wonder why…

"Should we tell everyone else?" asked Sasori.

"No." I said, Leader on the other hand had another idea.

"Yes." We glared at each other, Leader vs. me. Who will win?

"Fine." I muttered and he smirked. Damn him, I'll get him back.

"Itami you are not going to get a ring but you will get a cloak." said Leader gesturing for Sasori to grab one from a box in the corner. Sasori pulled one out of a nearby chest, and handed it to me.

Do they, like, keep that chest in here just for these situations?

"You don't have to wear it at all times and you will go on missions that are supposed to end in disaster. I want you to tell me what you know." he said. Sasori looked at me, his eyes said 'Tell him how we're going to die' and so I did.

"Well when Sasori and Deidara go after the One Tails Deidara loses both his arms and Sasori dies. Then when Hidan and Kakuzu go after a monk after getting the Two Tails at the bounty station Asuma's team faces them. Asuma is killed by Hidan and then they leave to seal the Two tails. Then when they're going after their next target Asuma's pupils catch up and kill Kakuzu and bury Hidan after cutting him into a bunch of pieces. Kisame dies later on by committing suicide so the organization's secrets don't get out. Konan is killed in a fight, you I am not completely sure about but I know you die, Zetsu lives, and Tobi lives, Deidara kills himself trying to kill Sasuke Uchiha, but Sasuke lives anyway. I think Sasuke kills Itachi, and I can actually show you all the deaths on my IPod because this world is just a TV show in my world." I explained. I lied a little bit because I didn't want to break the entire timeline by saying, Tobi is not who he seems and you and Konan decide to support Naruto so Tobi kills Konan and you use the Samsara of Heavenly Life Technique to revive the Leaf after destroying it and that kills you. I was not saying that. Leader listened closely as I talked.

"I knew Deidara would die young." said Sasori.

"You're the first to die." I pointed out.

"Yes but I'm-"

"35. I also happen to know a lot about everyone here, only Tobi and Zetsu are a mystery." I said. I'm going to keep Madara, or whoever the fuck Tobi is because he isn't actually Madara, off my back.

"I see, Sasori go and get everyone else." said Leader and Sasori left.

"So how do you get your injuries?" he asked.

"Well my dad's abusive and whenever I'm injured in my world it gets transferred to me here, and vice versa." I explained.

"I see, and you know a lot?" he asked.

"I know most of everyone's past and most of their futures, I do not know what Tobi does after a certain point or Zetsu, and basically Tobi outlives everyone." It was at this moment, everyone started coming in.

"What the hell is it?" asked Hidan. Kakuzu hit his head.

"Show respect." he said as Hidan glared at him

"Are we going to learn Sasori and Itami's secret, un?" asked Deidara.

"Can we make Deidara leave so he doesn't know?" I asked. Deidara was fun to irritate.

"No." said Leader.

"Damn." I muttered and Deidara stuck 3 tongues out at me. Although neither Deidara or I was willing to admit it out loud we had a good relationship, dare I say we are friends? Good friends even?

"Itami is…. not from our world." When Leader said that, everyone but Sasori and I stared at him like he was insane.

"Leader-sama, are you ok?" asked Kisame warily. I bet everyone thought he was crazy.

"We have proof." pointed out Sasori.

"That is how I get my injuries, when I sleep I go from world to world so if I get injured in one world, the wound travels to the other world immediately. And if I change before going to sleep right before I wake up the clothes change. I also, know the future of this world because in my world this world is a TV show. I know how most of you die, and out of all of you, Tobi lives the longest." I said, I think I've talked more today than in my entire life. This got reactions out of everyone besides Leader, Sasori, and me.

"Tobi lives long!" I looked at Tobi warily; I am trying to find out if Madara, or whoever the fuck Tobi is, was onto me knowing about him.

"Do I die in an explosion, yeah?" asked Deidara. He didn't care that he died? I would care if I died.

"So you're still being abused!" Konan realized. Oops I forgot she was on my case about that….

"Hn, I was suspicious." said Itachi, of course he was. That's why it seemed like he hated me, actually I think he does hate me.

"That's cool." said Kisame; he didn't really seem to care too much.

"I can't die fucker!" Hidan yelled. Well when he's buried alive for not listening Kakuzu and I will laugh, well I will, and leave him there.

"We could use her as fortune teller to get money…" muttered Kakuzu, I refuse to be his money machine.

Then it hit me, I hadn't met Zetsu yet.

"Hey I haven't met Zetsu yet." I said and at that moment as if my words triggered something, said cannibalistic plant-man came up from the ground next to me. He was half black and half white with the Venus flytrap just like in the anime, and it was fucking awesome.

"Never mind my previous comment." I said as Zetsu looked at me.

"_Who's she_? **Can we eat her**?" at least white Zetsu didn't want to eat me.

"This is Itami, our previous maid and newest informant. She is from another world and knows the future, and you cannot eat her." said Leader sternly, ha i'm important.

"_It's nice to meet you_. **Itami is a stupid name for a girl**. _I like her name. _**Well its a stupid name**." said Zetsu. Hah I like him, he can argue with himself.

"So far I like your white half better." I remarked, everyone laughed other than me, Itachi, Sasori, Leader, Kakuzu, and Zetsu. I think it was because all the tension building up from the revelation broke when I said that.

"Itami, inform Deidara and Sasori of their mission seeing as you know it. Also, try and develop a way to use your chakra. All of you are dismissed and you leave for your mission tomorrow." ordered Pein and we all left. It was going to be awhile.

* * *

Sometime later after explaining how the entire mission goes and promising to bring in my IPod to show them, Deidara, Sasori and I were in their room and I had 3 slits on my arm and my blood was in some vials.

"What are you guys doing to my blood?" I asked as Deidara put some of my blood in his clay and Sasori used the other 2 vials with his poisons.

"I think I can get my explosives to work with your blood, I'm trying to give you a defense, yeah. If things go according to how you say you're going to need a better defense than just a knife, un." explained Deidara as he put some of my blood in his hand mouth.

"Your blood is sweet, un." he said. My blood is _sweet_? Ignoring that strange remark I sighed and turned to Sasori.

"So what are you doing with my peculiar and apparently sweet blood?" I asked.

"I'm trying to see how poison affects your blood." he said not even looking up at me. I turned back to Deidara, he was more entertaining. I watched as he played around with some clay before handing a pink tinted spider to me.

"Throw this make this hand sign, and say katsu." he commanded showing me the hand sign. I threw the spider and made the hand sign Deidara was before saying "Katsu!" and making the clay spider explode.

"It works, un!" said Deidara.

"I need more blood,(un)." Both he and Sasori said at the same time. I sighed and grabbed my switchblade. I was probably going to lose a lot of blood for this.

* * *

"Here, un. I don't really want you to get hurt so in here I have 3 birds you can use to fly, a lot of spiders, and a few smaller birds. They're all C2, yeah. To make them explode say katsu with the hand sign and to make the bird bigger just make the hand sign while looking at it." said Deidara handing me a side pouch. I strapped it around my waist. He handed me a second pouch.

"The spiders are in this one in the left side, the birds are on the right, un." he said. We were leaving the next day for Gaara so we were preparing. I apparently was getting explosives.

"Itami." I heard Sasori say. He came up by us. He handed me some kunai with different colored tape around the handle.

"Each one has a different poison, purple is deadly, yellow is paralysis, grey is sleep, red is extra bleeding, and black, is emergency." he said. There were 3 blacks, 5 purple, 5 yellow, 3 red, and 5 greys. I put them in my kunai pouch that I would strap to my right leg. I also had on my left leg my switchblade pouch.

I wasn't very happy we were leaving tomorrow; it meant I had to show them the videos on the way there and I doubt Deidara's going to watch it thinking he can just rely on my memory, I wonder if he's going to lose his arms. Eh, how bad can it be?

Famous last words.

* * *

**Author's Note**

** So how's you like it? Did you expect her to wake up to Sasori? Everyone who guessed thought Konan, i tried hinting to it in other chapters but it was barely noticable.**

** Ok and now after this is going to be the Gaara vs Deidara fight, i already have it finished but i'm going over it, its pretty bad because i haven't seen the episodes in Shippuden so i changed them around a bit.**

** I really want an XBox 360 or a PlayStation3 because i want the game game Naruto Shippuden Ultimate Ninja Storms Generations! But my dads an old fart and says the Wii is just fine, they barely ever make good games for the Wii anymore! My dad hates that its summer because i spend all my tiem either on ym computer, Wii, Ds's, Nintendo 64 if i'm bothered to try and get it on or Gamecube, i have such old systems. **

** What game system would you recomend? PlayStation3 or XBox 360?**


	9. The One Tail Part 1

**Author's Note:**

** Heyyy its chapter 9. Its not as good as it could be because i am horrible at describing fights... especially fights in the air like this one. Anyway, enjoy the chapter and stuff.**

* * *

The One Tail, Part 1

"Ok, so, I'm going to show you guys what happens on my IPod, watch closely and see if it can help you." I said and I started the episode. Sasori was watching intently, Deidara however, was not. I let Sasori hold the IPod before I turned to Deidara.

"Pay attention Deidara!" I snapped.

"I'll be fine, un." said Deidara.

"You'll be fine my ass." I mumbled to myself before pulling out my DS. According to Sasori it was a few hours' worth of a walk through the desert so I brought my DS to pass the time. I was playing Sims 3 on it; it sucks for the DS though. I prefer it on the computer. After a while it got way too hot for me to play so I put it in a scroll like Konan taught me. It still had that bloody hand print, but now I have an explanation as to why.

You use chakra to put the stuff in it right? Well my chakra's in my blood so that means I would have to also use my blood, making me leave a bloody handprint. It wasn't actually me who figured this out, it was Sasori when he saw the bloody scroll.

I hate the desert. Its sandy and I don't have a hat to keep the sun off my face and out of my hair. I was wearing black short shorts, showing the scars I had on my legs and a sleeveless dark green top with my arms bandaged. I had on my boots, no, not the combat ones, the ones easier to run and walk in. So I was wearing dark colors in the desert…

I was so hot!

"Are you hot, un?" asked Deidara as he noticed I was extremely slow and sluggish. I was falling behind and almost dead.

"No." I wheezed out. I pulled my hair from its bun and then squeezed sweat from it. Then I pulled it back up into its bun. I hated the heat; I prefer winter when I don't feel like I'm being baked.

"Are you sure, yeah?" he asked watching me.

"On second thought, carry me." I said using all my energy to run and jump onto Deidara's back.

"Why me, un?" he asked.

"Sasori's too far away." I muttered looking at Sasori who was about 3 feet in front of Deidara. Yes that's too far away.

"How much do you weigh, un? You're not very heavy." said Deidara.

"Not much" Deidara nodded and I pulled the white thing on his hat back so that I could stick my head under.

"What are you doing?" asked Deidara stopping.

"I'm hot, so shut the hell up." I said falling limp so that my face was buried in his shoulder. He had to support me otherwise I'd fall off.

"Would you two stop fooling around? You're both nuisances." said Sasori, or Hiruko. I don't like Hiruko's voice; I like Sasori's voice better.

"You carry her then, un." said Deidara, moving me so that I wasn't falling off his back.

"Where's the thing you had before?" asked Sasori as we started to walk again.

"Too… hot…" I muttered. I had gotten too hot to focus on it so i put it in my bag.

"I see the city walls, un." said Deidara. My head shot up and to my relief there was Suna in the distance.

"Thank Jashin. Remind me to pray or something later." I said before falling limp again. I just ignored everything from there out and tried to concentrate my mind on cool things like ice cream, ice, snow, water, anything cool.

"Itami, un. Wake up!" With that I was dropped unceremoniously on my back. We were at the gate and there were a bunch of dead bodies.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"You're going to go with Deidara because we both know he wasn't listening or watching." said Sasori.

"It won't be safe for her, un." pointed out Deidara.

"No, but you will lose an arm if I don't come." I said and Deidara sighed.

"Fine, un. You better not get killed or fall off, yeah." muttered Deidara as he made a bird for us to fly on.

"Whatever. Is it cooler in the air?" I asked as we got on.

"Probably, un." said Deidara.

"Fuck yeah!" I said happily as we took off. I' hate the heat and will even show i'm happy if it will make me cooler. We flew around looking for Gaara, well Deidara was looking for Gaara, I was enjoying the refreshing air.

"Katsu." I looked down to see 3 guards get killed by Deidara's spiders. Fine by me, it's not like I knew them. I know, I'm heartless, deal with it.

The sun was pretty much down now… it was time.

"Deidara, land over there." I said pointing to a roof that resembled where Deidara lands in the anime. Deidara flew over and jumped off with me right behind him.

"Infiltration successful." said Deidara. I shook my head.

"That's as far as you go." We looked up to see Gaara, he looked cool in person, with the red hair and the kanji on his forehead was awesome.

Wish I could do that without getting looks; actually I already get looks for my piercings, even when the Akatsuki first saw them I got weird looks.

* * *

"Itami are those piercings!" asked Konan as she examined my face and pulled up my bang. Kisame looked up from the TV.

"Hey look at her, she's a metal head." joked Kisame. His face had a weird look though.

"Itami, why do you have so many piercings in your face, un?" asked Deidara. I couldn't really think of a reason why, I guess I wanted to be noticed by my parents, I got these back when I was 10. I got weird looks because most 10 year olds do not have face piercings. I guess they got me noticed, just not in the right way.

"I've had them for a while, I guess I wanted attention." I admitted.

"Well, it looks cool I guess." said Kisame, his weird look was gone.

"Artistic, yeah." said Deidara smiling at me before going back to playing with his clay.

"…I have a labret so I can't argue." said Konan as she touched said piercing.

* * *

Deidara put his hands in his clay pouch before jumping up. The sand came at me, and I cussed before turning around and jumping off the building. Deidara caught me on his bird and the sand followed us as we flew away.

We flew up before we made a sharp turn and flew down. I grabbed onto Deidara because he was somehow not falling off. He made a sharp turn and flew through the Suna streets as Gaara's sand flew after us. Then we flew up in the air, I was hanging onto Deidara for dear life. We flew back down more towards Gaara who came up off the roof on his sand.

"How'd you know we were the intruders, hm?" Deidara asked Gaara. I answered him.

"Did you see any other birds like yours?" I asked.

"No, did you, un?"

"I was dying from heat." I said simply.

"The girl is right, there are no birds like that one in this desert." stated Gaara.

"Well so much for a covert operation, at least this way I don't have to go and look for you, un." said Deidara. At that, sand rose up from the ground; it was exactly like the anime. I hit Deidara on the head.

"You didn't listen at all did you!" I yelled. He looked at all the sand and ignored me.

"He has the advantage, this is going to be messy, yeah." said Deidara.

"Damn it listen to me and-" He did NOT just put his hand over my mouth. I wanted to bite his hand but I would rather not kiss his hand mouth. We started to dodge arms and hands made of sand. I held onto Deidara who was able to stay on. Deidara let out a few birds and they did pretty much nothing to the sand.

"Itami I have a plan that you're probably not going to like, un." said Deidara.

"What's the plan?" I asked warily.

"This is, un." I'm going to murder him slowly in his sleep. He pushed me backwards and I flew off the bird straight towards Gaara. Now usually i would be calm, cool, and collected. This was an exception to my usual behavior.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" I yelled and I screeched as I leaned away from some sand trying to grab me. At least he was distracted. As Gaara was distracted Deidara threw more birds at him. They exploded and I pulled out a clay bird from my pouch. I dropped it underneath me and made a hand sign. I landed on the clay bird; I realized Deidara never taught me how to fly it.

"Uhhh, go to Deidara?" I tried. The bird just flapped its wings to stay in the air.

"Damn it, uh, that way!" I said standing up and pointing to Deidara. Still nothing.

"Damn it!" I yelled. Ok think Itami, the reason it works for me is because my chakra is in my blood and my blood is in the clay, so maybe if I learn to control my chakra that's how I can control the bird! I sighed and focused on my blood.

"C'mon, focus. Blood, chakra, blood." I felt something in my feet keeping me on the blood and something in my mind, maybe a connection?

'Go to Deidara!' I commanded the bird mentally through that connection and it flew up to Deidara. Hell yeah I figured it out! I flew out of the smoke as it dispersed showing Gaara who was inside a sphere of sand and probably unharmed. The bird flew up to Deidara and I jumped off it onto Deidara's bird.

"You idiot I could have died!" I yelled. I was yelling alot lately. Then a shadow came over us as sand came up around us.

"Shit!" I yelled and Deidara began flying us away, I once again grabbed onto him.

"This isn't good, un." said Deidara as he pulled me in front of him and used his cloak to shield me. Everything went dark and the sand trapped us in. Like in the anime, Deidara really wasn't listening to me, or watching because he's doing exactly what he did in the anime. There was an explosion and Deidara pulled me out of his cloak and held me around my waist with one arm as we fell. Sand grabbed onto his leg and threw us through the air back to the sand. It opened up to swallow us when Deidara threw out a bird and we landed on its back and flew away.

"You should have listened to me so that you wouldn't be making all these mistakes!" I yelled getting another hand over my mouth, if his hand mouth kisses me I'm throwing him off the bird. We flew around dodging sand.

"Damn it watch out you're going to lose your arm in a minute!" I yelled as sand grabbed on to his arm, sigh, it's his fault for not listening. It crawled up his arm and squashed his arm into the sand after he tried breaking from it with a clay centipede, no success. Blood seeped from the sand and some hit me in the face. He flew us around before the sand fell off and I openly gaped at his cloak sleeve.

"How do you act like you didn't feel that?" I asked, he ignored my question. I really want to kno though i mean seriously!

"Itami want to try another plan?" asked Deidara.

"No, go ahead and use the clay you have mixed with Gaara's sand to explode him." I said grumpily.

"Great, yeah."

"What? Deidara!" He fucking threw me off the bird at Gaara again.

"I'LL FUCKING SACRIFICE YOU TO JASHIN!" I yelled as sand came at me. I made myself aerodynamic and dodged the sand. I flew right into Gaara's sphere. You know how in movies how when you run against a glass door or window and they're kind of slowly sliding down? Well that's what happened to me.

"Oomph, I'm killing Deidara." I muttered as I started to slide off the sphere. Gaara was staring at me from inside the sand sphere; I could see him from the small hole that was from the sand chasing Deidara. Wait, Gaara's staring at me… that's not good.

"Oh this might be a problem." I said as sand wrapped around my arms and legs trapping me to the sphere. The sand started to squeeze my arms and legs and it hurt a lot! That was when a spider jumped off the back of my head into Gaara's sphere.

"Katsu!" The familiar yell filled the sky and the spider blew up the sphere sending me flying off it to my death, Deidara caught me before I died. I looked up at his face from where he was holding me.

"Hey, un." he said. I punched him in the face and he dropped me on his bird. He started to fly to where Gaara was, unconscious? Or maybe dead, that explosion looked like it hurt.

"I was listening to you before and decided to give up my arm and distract him with you, while he was distracted with my arm I put the bug on you, it was C2 if you were wondering, yeah. Then I threw you at him and since you didn't seem to have anything to fight with, he trapped you to his sphere giving my bug a chance to explode, un." explained Deidara.

"If you hadn't admitted to listening, I would use the clay you gave me to turn you into your art." I muttered as we almost made it to Gaara.

"Fire!" Arrows with explosive tags on them were launched at us but Deidara weaved through them. Of course a few would land so being the brave person I was I would grab the arrow and throw it off before it exploded. We made it to Gaara who Deidara kept in the tail of the bird we were on. We flew back to Sasori.

"How did it go?" he asked observing us. My hair was probably messy from me being thrown around like a ball and my clothes were full of sand. Deidara was much better besides the fact he was missing an arm, I still want to know how he acts like he doesn't feel that. Seriously, if I lost an arm I'd be freaking out! I started shaking my head and Deidara watched as sand came from my hair. He's lucky, his hair had no sand in it while mine pretty much had a sand castle in it!

"Can we please leave now? I hate the desert and NEVER want to come back." I muttered as Deidara chuckled. I took some sand from my hair and threw it in his hair to make me feel better, it worked a little. Deidara frowned before pulling the sand out easily.

"And you, I still might sacrifice you to Jashin." I muttered.

"Do I even want to know why?" asked Sasori, it was more to himself than to us. Deidara and I jumped off the bird.

"Let's go." I said and we all started to walk. Deidara pulled out his hat and put it on.

"Can we just fly? I would like to be out of the desert soon." I said about 10 seconds later. I already had sand in my shoes and we had barely walked 5 steps.

"No, we're walking." said Sasori. I groaned. An explosion was heard behind us awhile later.

"Sounds like they fell for your trap Danna, un." said Deidara, Sasori left a paper bomb on a ninja to slow them down from chasing us. He also made a bunch of tracks going in different directions.

"Traps are made to be fallen into." said Sasori. This was going to be a boring walk. Sometime later it changed from night to day; I had been up 24 hours.

"I wonder if my family is freaking out at home? Or maybe just my brothers… I locked my door with a note on it saying I was sick, but they naturally worry about me." I wondered aloud.

"I don't care about your family." said Sasori.

"You're such a mean person Danna." I said, taking Deidara's way of addressing him. Deidara grinned and Sasori turned his head to glare at me. I was trying to piss him off.

"So what's going to happen now Itami, un?" asked Deidara, trying to stop me from pissing off Sasori.

"Why ask me?" I asked. I wanted to annoy him. It's what he gets for throwing me at Gaara twice.

"You're the one who knows the future, un." said Deidara. Sasori stopped so Deidara and I stopped.

"Kankuro." I said and a gasp came from behind us. We turned to see Kankuro.

"Give me back Gaara." he said before pulling out his scrolls.

"I'm bored." I said as he let out his puppets. Deidara nodded in agreement, Sasori was a boring fighter because he barely ever moved. He sent puppets after you with dangerous weapons, that's boring.

"Deidara and I will go on ahead Danna, you're going to win." I said as Deidara wrapped an arm around my waist and jumped up onto the bird with me.

We arrived at the cave some time later after Sasori rejoined us. I looked down at the water.

"How am I going to get over there?" My question led to me being carried on Deidara's shoulder.

"How many times have I told you how much I hate you?" I asked.

"None and that's because you know you love me, un." teased Deidara as he walked over to the boulder. The boulder rose up and I was carried in.

"You wish." I said as I was let down and Leader raised the sealing statue. I looked around the cave ignoring their conversation. It was a pretty cool looking cave because of the statue. Deidara and Sasori jumped up onto their fingers and I groaned, I was going to be so bored.

"What am I supposed to do during the sealing?" I asked.

"Bitch it's your job to clean." said the hologram Hidan.

"Fuck you! Oh, and you're helping me sacrifice Deidara to Jashin when we meet back at the base." I said.

"Fuck yeah!"

"Why, un?"

"Because you threw me at Gaara twice! I don't like being thrown through the air at the person trying to kill me!" I growled, Hidan laughed.

"Even though I find that fucking funny, I am going to help you sacrifice his ass to Jashin." said Hidan. Kakuzu sighed.

"No you're not, and neither are you Itami." he said. I pouted.

"Itami why Is Deidara missing an arm?" asked Pein. It took him that long to notice?

"He didn't listen, is an idiot, and he planned to lose it." I said and Deidara nodded to confirm it although he frowned when I said he was an idiot. But he still nodded his head, ha!

"Fine, now we will begin the sealing process." said Leader. I groaned, this was going to be boring, I wonder if the Akatsuki lost the movie I brought… I left to go and find it in the door connected to the base. Here's what I am probably going to do during the 3 days; clean, train, and watch the movie if I find it. That's about it.

It's going to be boring.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

** This chapter was not my best chapter. **

** To Kayla the Wolf(Guest) who asked me to write a Shikamaru and OC story using her OC. I really like your OC but i don't think i can write a story about an OC i didn't come up with very well. When i make a story i usually start with the OC and then make the plot and backstory. Also I have a hard time staying in character and usually have to go back and fix Itami because she was either talking too much or was acting out of character. Maybe i can write a story using your OC when my writing imrpoves to the point where i can use someone else's OC but until then i don't think i can.**

** Anyways next chapter is going to be her and Deidara, not her and Sasori. I can't explain the fight with Sasori vs Chiyo and Sakura because of how much i suck at explaining fights, especially the ones i didn't make up.**

** Oh and one more thing, I HATE THE LINES! They don't appear half the time after i save so i have to go back and fix them. So if theres no line but you feel there should be, pretend there's a line there. There probably was and it just disappeared. **

** End of Authoress's ranting... Lucky you**


	10. The One Tail Part 2

**Author's Note-**

**...**

**I had writers block ok? Its probably because my computer was being annoying and deleted the first version i had of this chapter during my epic writing moment, so this chapter sucks too. I promise next chapter will be out faster and will be better! Besides i hate it when i have to write something that actually happened in the Anime.**

* * *

The One Tail, Part 2

"I'm glad that the extraction is over, un." said Deidara stretching out his arm.

"You didn't miss much." I said as he and Sasori jumped off the statue. I looked over at Gaara's body.

"So now what should we do?" asked Sasori looking to me.

"Mm we stay here and then after fighting a bit we leave Gaara to them." I said after a moment.

"Ok." said Sasori. It was then that the boulder exploded. I looked over the people that entered and Deidara was ready to fight with his hands in his clay pouch. Sasori was also ready. Of course we weren't expecting that the group had a 5th member.

This girl was not from the anime. She had long red hair with black tips at the end. Her skin was pale like mine and her eyes were like mine only opposite. Her cold eyes met mine, and everything seemed to go black. I felt myself fade from the world along with her as we floated in a dark space. It was a weird feeling, almost like falling.

"My name is Fukusei." said the girl.

"I'm Itami." I said as we stared at each other.

"I'm a part of you." she said. My face had a WTF look. That was random. But seriously, wouldn't you react the same way to some saying to you 'I'm a part of you'?

"Yet I am not you." she continued. My face still was giving her a WTF look.

"I am more or less you in this world." I think I'm starting to get an understanding.

"In every world there is a person. In another world there is another person like that person. Each person has another person like them in every world. Itami, you being in this world means there are two of us in this world. I am the Itami of this world; you are the Itami of your world. You are messing the timeline up by being in this world. I am not supposed to ever meet the Leaf ninja but I did because you are here. You are trying to prevent a death that is supposed to happen, you shouldn't mess with time." explained Fukusei with a grave face.

"I don't know how I got here though." I pointed out.

"Then figure it out and leave! You do not belong in my world, go back to your own." she hissed. I think she's bipolar or something because first she was calm, and now she looks like I'm trying to steal her boyfriend or something.

"Pissy." I remarked.

"You're going to break the timeline; you're going to ruin everything! If you don't leave then it'll be up to me to hunt you down and kill you. This world is mine and you do not belong here!" she yelled.

"I'll do whatever I want." I said giving her a smirk before the darkness faded along with her. I blinked and when I opened my eyes, I saw blue. What is blue? Let's see, water, Deidara's eyes, the sky, and mirrors when reflecting one of my eyes. So what one did I see? I saw the sky, and then I saw Deidara's eyes.

"You blanked out, un." said Deidara when I noticed that he was missing his arm, no not the one he lost originally, the one he had after he lost the other. I stared for a moment.

"How did you lose your arm?" I asked calmly even though I furious on the inside.

"When I got you out of there the grey haired guys Sharingan got me." he spat bitterly.

"Where's Sasori?" I asked.

"I left him with the old lady and pink haired girl. We have the Jinchuuriki following us with the Sharingan guy." said Deidara. Ok so we're not doing very good, I'm going to come up with a better plan next time. I stood up after holding onto Deidara for support and I looked behind us. Kakashi and Naruto were following after us.

"Ok, we're going to have to land and make a run for it." I said.

"Why, un?" asked Deidara.

"They can see us in the air, we can hide on the ground." I said and with my short explanation, Deidara landed us. He sent the bird back to Kakashi and Naruto, a few seconds later it exploded.

"Let's go!" I said and I started running with some speed, I was able to run fast but not ninja fast. Of course, to our credit when we ran into Leaf ninja next, it wasn't Kakashi or Naruto. It was Team Gai.

"Good work Neji!" said Gai as Neji looked us over. He looked me over a few times. i decided to try and buy myself some time by saying something stupid. It was an obviously stupid idea, but i couldn't think of anything.

"Stop checking me out." I blurted, mentally smacking myself in the face. That was the most fucking stupid thing i had ever said in my entire life.

"Who would want to check you out, yeah?" he asked. I gave him a glare but stayed silent. Neji had decided to ignore my comment.

"She doesn't have normal chakra, I can barely see it." commented Neji.

"Team Gai attack!" said Gai and I gave Deidara a kunai while I turned and ran. It's obvious that I had the fighting ability of a Genin, so I would be screwed should I try and fight one of them. Of course my speed compared to the speed of a ninja was nothing so I had barely made it 20 feet before one of them decided to chase me.

"Going somewhere?" asked Neji as he jumped in front of me. I swore and pulled some of Deidara's clay spiders from my pouch. I threw them at Neji who was being ninja and dodged them. Why did I have to get the Hyuga prodigy? I might have been able to fool Lee, or dodge Tenten's weapons.

I dodged a palm to my chest and pulled out a black kunai, hey it was an emergency. I tried to hit him but my fighting ability is below average for this world. He easily dodged before grabbing my arm and throwing me down. I was going to play dead but he grabbed me by the back of my shirt and threw me into a tree. The Akatsuki went easy on me in training. I saw stars as he grabbed me again and tried to cut the chakra off from my arms. Apparently, I don't have chakra points; I have blood chakra so Neji's ability to stop chakra did nothing to me.

"Ha!" I said as I somehow managed to graze his cheek with my kunai. I wonder what the black stuff does? Wasn't Sasori playing with my blood and the poisons? Maybe my blood is in it or something. Neji yelled as his blood started to come out faster and he grabbed his eyes. I'm so asking Sasori what was on that. I quickly turned and high tailed it out of there, I wasn't very fast because being hit in the chest, being thrown to the floor and then thrown into a tree hurts. Oh, and I had this huge scratch across my face from being thrown into the tree. It was bleeding and got into my blue eye so now I'm half blind.

"Itami!" I turned to see Deidara running to me.

"What?" I asked as he stopped.

"You have a bird left right, yeah?" God damn I'm a retard. How did I not think of that before? I pulled out the bird and stared at it.

"I can be scattered brained sometimes." I announced emotionlessly before making the bird bigger and getting on with Deidara.

"Let's go get Danna, un." said Deidara. I flew the bird back with Deidara's directions. We landed in the cave and Sasori was not doing good because Sakura and Chiyo had Fukusei. I glared at the latter, Fukusei, you will die.

I took my kunai and jumped at Fukusei ignoring Deidara's warning to stay back. Fukusei saw me coming and ended up dodging before stabbing me in the shoulder with a kunai. I let out an uncharacteristic battle cry before stabbing her with my kunai; it was still the black one. She froze up and fell over gasping…. different reaction that Neji. Then I was sent flying from a punch by Sakura. I hit the wall very hard and since her punches are equal to being hit by a bus, I was knocked unconscious.

* * *

Waking up from being chakra punched is not fun. I had a killer headache, my stomach, where she hit me, was killing me, and then my shoulder was bleeding. I was a mess. So I forced myself up and limped over to my bathroom where I cursed Neji, Sakura, and Fukusei. After putting a few band aids over the cut above my eye, washing my eye out, wrapping my shoulder up, glaring at my leg that happened to hurt because of Neji, and putting an ice pack up my shirt and using medical tape to keep it on my black and blue stomach. Damn chakra punches hurt. I took some pills for the headache and then went downstairs. It was night because it was still day when I had been in the Naruto world.

"Itami you're alive!" said Jack. I stared at him and Chris before looking at the clock. It was 3 in the morning, they're probably pulling an all nighter with their friends, who were checking me out. I hated two of their friends because they were perverts. They perv on me! What do you expect, for me to be all buddy-buddy with them?

The first perv was Buckley, no joke his name is Buckley. He had long brown hair that reminded me off Justin Bieber's hair and dark blue eyes that you could barely see. Next was Jimmy, he was an annoying blonde boy with similar hair to Buckley except he was always flipping his hair which made me twitch. Their last friend who I didn't mind was Nikko; he was the shortest of them all with red, orange not red like mine, hair and green eyes. He was probably the nicest and smartest of them all.

"Hey Itami. Why are you in pain?" asked Nikko, damn him for being smart. Why couldn't he just be staring at my boobs instead of my face like Buckley and jimmy? Well at that moment anyway, I would rather not have my brothers only smart friend be a perv too. Jack was poking my band aids above my eye while I glared at him. He decided then that I needed to socialize with his friends.

"Itami come socialize with us, you've been antisocial for the past few weeks!" said Jack pulling me over to the circle.

"Were you guys playing Truth or Dare?" I asked flatly, they all denied it but I knew they were lying. I'm not an idiot.

"Let's play 7 Minutes in Heaven!" announced Jimmy. What did I say? He was a perv! If you don't understand, basically I'm the only girl.

"Hell no." said all the guys together; I instead said "I'd rather die." with them.

"Fine, how about 10 fingers or I've never?" suggested Chris.

"Can I leave?" Jack and Chris both responded to my question with a no. So we started playing, so far I've lost most of my fingers. It had been about 5 minutes; these guys were like 10 year old girls. I was manlier than them.

"I've never held a weapon." said Nikko. There went my last finger. Before anyone could react I was gone, I hated socializing with them. I can feel my brain cells die if I'm even in the same room. Nikko at least held decent conversation, other than him only Jack and Chris sometimes.

For the rest of the night I glared at the ceiling until morning. I went to school grumpy, skipped my visit with the nurse, came home in a better mood than when I went to school, and was hit on the head with a glass bottle that once held Vodka. Previous head trauma prevented it from knocking me out even though the bottle could probably break a wall.

I turned to my dad; decided I was NOT in the mood before effectively kicking his knee and walking away. I only do that when I'm not in the mood and downstairs, upstairs he would be stuck in my room. I then left upstairs to my room where I watched some Anime, read some Manga, read some Fanfiction, ignored my homework, and then finally went to sleep, or went to the Naruto world.

* * *

"Itami?" I heard someone ask. I opened my eyes to find Sasori and Konan.

"At least you're alive." I said sitting up from my bed.

"Deidara has his arms back." said Konan as Deidara walked into my room. His arms were stitched on in various places. It actually looked pretty cool. I stared for a moment before turning to Sasori.

"Did you kill the red haired girl that resembled me?" I asked. I wanted her dead, besides if not she might come after me and i'd rather not have her after me.

"No."

"Damn, what was in your black poison anyway?" I questioned.

"I had used your blood and mixed it with a few poisons to make it so that your blood mixed with their chakra and made their chakra system and anything that was using chakra or if they tried using chakra extremely painful. It might be deadly if it's not fixed too." said Sasori. It's nice to know my blood can be used as a weapon. I got off my bed and walked over to Deidara. I hit him on the head.

"You didn't listen to me." I answered when he asked why I had hit him. Don't question me. I always use logic.

I am always right

* * *

**Author's Rant -_-'**

** So again, sooooooooooo sorry this took forever and its horrible next chapter wil be better and longer. Thank you for all those who have reviewed because reviews give me ideas and make me get off my lazy ass and write. **

** My Ipod's broken... well no its the Wifi that's broken. it says i have 3 bars of Wifi, but it won't let me use Youtube or the safari thing. So my inspiration is almost gone because i can't listen to music!**

** I am in a ranting mood today. I went to a party yesterday, well two parties, and i used no sunscreen and i'm not burned! I'm happy about that atually. now i'm not pale either, i'm actually tan:) Anyway the first party there were bouncy rides and i beat up this boy on one of them with this blue thing i used as a battering ram on him. He's lucky i didn't aim lower -_- Then the clown people decided that the older kids got to play with the messy stuff because they only had little kid games. So i ended up with jello in my hair, whip cream on my face, and oatmeal all over me. The oatmeal was payback from the boy i beat up, we were partners on the game and he purposely missed and hit me with the oatmeal, eh he was worse. I hit him twice with whipcream, jello, and i poured the oatmeal in his lap so he was covere. I only had my shoulders, face, hair, and legs covered in stuff. Now today i'm really sore because another thing they had was a palm tree climb, my arms were the only thing holding me on, i never use my arms! They feel like jello now. They also had a mechanical bull, i was thrown off like... 10 times. Then my legs hurt because i walked more yesterday than i have this entire summer put together.**

** I felt like ranting because i haven't had anyone to talk to lately. I've been anti-social. **

** Anyway i'm going to do Q/A's again because then i'll have something else to rant about instead of my boring life.**

** Question- Anime or Manga? If Anime, subbed or dubbed?**

**Oh and before the end of my rant, there's supposed to be a poll on my page but i'm not sure if i did it right... so if its not there don't blame me.**

** End of Authoress's rant**


	11. Don't Fuck with me

**Author's Note:**

** This chaptr broke my promises last chapter, its not longer and i wasn't much faster at updating. -_- I apologise. Enjoy this chapter. Oh by the way the song is Alle that I'm living for by Evanescence.**

* * *

Don't fuck with me

I still can't figure out how Hidan managed to rope me into this. You see, after I healed up a bit more from that punch, I started cleaning the base again because if I didn't, there was stuff everywhere. Then today, Hidan decided to rope me into something, something I normally wouldn't do.

"Why are we doing this again?" I asked.

"He put another fucking bomb in my food." replied Hidan as I followed him through the base. You see Hidan had decided that he was going to ignore Kakuzu, who had said not to do this, and instead decided we would be sacrificing Deidara. I was still a bit pissed that he had did something that dangerous without my consent. I could have been killed!

"Kakuzu and Leader are going to be mad." I pointed out.

"They can go fuck themselves." muttered Hidan. Deidara had once again put a bomb in his food. This time I had made him make a smaller one so I wouldn't be cleaning the entire kitchen.

"Beside's, we're going to do it In Zetsu's garden so Zetsu can eat his fucking remains and they'll never know." said Hidan smugly.

"Zetsu might tell Leader, or it would be obvious we did it because we wanted to kill him earlier." I said receiving a snort form Hidan.

"Zetsu wouldn't fucking care because he'd get to eat the fucking body and you have a poker face that could rival Kakuzu's, so you'd lie for us." explained Hidan confidently. I'd have to do the lying because when Hidan lies he doesn't swear so you can tell.

"Fine." I said and Hidan stopped, I looked around him curiously. Deidara was walking down the hall, towards us and we happened to be right next to Zetsu's garden's door.

"Hey Itami, un." greeted Deidara seeing me, yes he ignored Hidan.

"Oi what about fucking me?" asked Hidan.

"I don't exactly want to fuck you." said Deidara. Ah I love the word fuck. It can be taken so many ways, Deidara happened to twist it around on Hidan.

"Fuck you!" yelled Hidan.

"Not you, I wouldn't mind Itami though, un." I almost burst a blood vessel.

"Deidara!" I yelled angrily as I pulled out my switchblade. Deidara held up his hands, the mouths stuck out their tongues at me.

"Well its true, I'd rather you than Hidan, un!" he defended. I contemplated trying to stab him. Now I had more of a reason to sacrifice him. My contemplating was cut short as Hidan opened the door next to me and shoved Deidara into me. I was then pushed to the floor with Deidara on top of me. There was a slam as the door shut.

"Have fun fuckers!" called Hidan and I heard him walk away. Deidara got off me and I glared daggers at the door. How dare he lock me in here?

"Itami, un." I ignored Deidara as I plotted Hidan's death.

"Itami, yeah!" said Deidara louder this time. I still was planning Hidan's death so I ignored him.

"Itami!" this time he shook me so I glared at him instead.

"What?" I asked.

"I don't have my clay, un. If Zetsu finds us he might eat us, yeah." That was a problem. I couldn't take Zetsu with just my switchblade.

"Well can't you just break down the door?" I asked. Deidara shook his head.

"Kakuzu had them made with extra strength wood so when we're fighting they aren't broken, un." explained Deidara. I glared at the door and tried the handle wondering if Hidan had locked the door. He had.

"Damn it." I muttered before looking to Deidara who had sat down Indian style and was staring at me as I tried to open the door.

"Well, un?" he asked.

"Well what?" I asked as I tried to use a hair pin from my hair and my switchblade to pick the lock. Sadly, the lock on the door was better than the rest of the hideouts locks so my hair pin snapped like a twig.

"Well can you get us out, un?" asked Deidara. As an answer I held up the broken hair pin. Deidara glared at it and I sat down on my knees next to him.

"So, un." Deidara was trying to start a conversation.

"So what?" I asked, that reminded me of a song. Then I remembered, I had my IPod! Cheering in my mind, I pulled it from my pocket.

"What's that, un?" asked Deidara looking it over curiously. I unlocked it after putting in the ridiculously hard pass code, 1234. Yes I know, hard to remember. I went to my song list and immediately turned on my favorite song.

_All that I'm living for,_

_All that I'm dying for,_

_All that I can't ignore alone at night._

_I can feel the night beginning. _

_Separate me from the living._

_Understanding me,_

_After all I've seen._

_Piecing every thought together,_

_Find the words to make me better._

_If I only knew how to pull myself apart._

_All that I'm living for,_

_All that I'm dying for,_

_All that I can't ignore alone at night._

_All that I'm wanted for,_

_Although I wanted more._

_Lock the last open door, my ghosts are gaining on me._

_I believe that dreams are sacred._

_Take my darkest fears and play them_

_Like a lullaby,_

_Like a reason why,_

_Like a play of my obsessions,_

_Make me understand the lesson,_

_So I'll find myself,_

_So I won't be lost again._

_All that I'm living for,_

_All that I'm dying for,_

_All that I can't ignore alone at night._

_All that I'm wanted for,_

_Although I wanted more._

_Lock the last open door, my ghosts are gaining on me._

_Guess I thought I'd have to change the world to make you see me,_

_To be the one._

_I could have run forever,_

_But how far would I have come_

_Without mourning your love?_

_All that I'm living for,_

_All that I'm dying for,_

_All that I can't ignore alone at night._

_All that I'm wanted for,_

_Although I wanted more._

_Lock the last open door; my ghosts are gaining on me._

_Should it hurt to love you?_

_Should I feel like I do?_

_Should I lock the last open door,_

_My ghosts are gaining on me._

When the song ended Deidara looked at me weird. I just went through my song list but Deidara grabbed my IPod.

"Give. It. Back." I snarled. No one touches my IPod!

No. One.

Deidara just grinned and tried to figure out how to use my IPod.

I wanted my IPod back, so I let out an uncharacteristic snarl before launching myself at Deidara. He yelled in surprise as I knocked him over and tried to steal my IPod back. He held it out over his head and tried to push me off. I ended up straddling him and leaning with my boobs in his face trying to grab my IPod. I was too busy trying to get back my IPod I missed the click of the door being unlocked and opened.

"Well this is fucking interesting." Deidara and I froze and turned to see Hidan sticking his head in. I got off Deidara and pulled out my switchblade. Hidan saw this and raised an eyebrow as if asking 'What's that going to do?'

"I'm going to castrate you." I said simply before running to the door. It took Hidan a full second to register I said castrate, another full second to realize what castrate meant, and then another second to realize I was coming at him. So it took about 4 seconds for him to slam shut the door and lock it.

"No way bitch!" he yelled. I started banging on the door and Hidan laughed and started to walk away. As his laughter subsided I glared at the door willing it to burst into flames.

"How do you work this, yeah?" My attention was snapped back to Deidara and my IPod.

"Give." I ordered holding out my hand.

"No, un." It took me less than a second to register he said no and then less than half a second to launch myself at him again. He was prepared this time and he flipped me over and sat on my back as he played with my IPod. I sighed and let my face fall into the stone floor we were on.

"Itami, how do I use this, un?" asked Deidara.

"Why would I tell you when you won't give it back or get off me?" I asked and he let me up before handing my IPod back to me. I spent an hour showing him how to use it, and I also showed him how to use the calling feature on it. Truthfully it was an IPhone but I used it only as an IPod now, I liked my phone as a phone better.

"Cool, un!" said Deidara as he watched me play around on the apps I had on it. That was when we heard it. Footsteps, coming down that path and around the hedge that had us hidden from the garden. The footsteps were heavy, not light like mine, Deidara's, and Sasori's. It was most likely Zetsu, if not Kisame but he probably wasn't out here.

**"What are you doing out here?** Hello Itami. **Deidara why are you out here!? What's that?"** Ah it was Zetsu. His multiple personalities amuse me to no end.

"Why are you in our garden? **Get out."** Well, we're in trouble.

"Hidan locked us in here, yeah?" tried Deidara giving them a sheepish smile.

"Let's eat them." It took that for Deidara to grab me and jump over the hedge. He ran with me through the garden with Zetsu chasing us. Zetsu's garden was actually very nice, Zetsu was an excellent gardener.

"You fuckers having fun!?" called Hidan from the door. Deidara ran at him full speed. It took Hidan too long to try and close the door and Deidara dragged me through the doorway before slamming the door shut. I pulled out my switchblade and Deidara grabbed a kunai. We both glared at the immortal.

"I'm castrating you." Was what I said.

"You're going to die, un." promised Deidara. Hidan ran down the hall with Deidara and I chasing him, it was actually pretty fun. When Deidara eventually caught him I stabbed him in the stomach a few times and left it at that. Leader would not be happy if I castrated someone.

The moral of this story?

Don't fuck with me because you will go down, be castrated, and be on my hit list

* * *

**Author-s Ranting:**

**I'm a pleased banana right now because as of now i am only 1 review away from 50. It makes my heart warm when i know that people actually care enough to tell me what they think.**

** Ok and to answer some people who said that the last chapter was good here is my reasoning to why i thought it sucked. An artists biggest critic is himself, i think thats how the saying goes anyway. So basically i criticize it more than everyone else. And i criticize alot.**

** A-What was the question? Oh yeah, anime or manag and subbed or dubbed? i personally prefer the anime dubbed but i will watch subbed. I have no preferance on subbed ro dubbed, it really matters if i feel like reading the subtitles. i really want to learn Japanese so i don't have to read the subtitles. And i have never read the manga so i don't know if i would like it. **

**Q- I have been thinking long and hard on this question, and so the question is, what song portrays the story? Basically what song goes with the story? Like a theme song or something. I'm just curious becaue i need inspiration desperately. I would appreciatr song, artist, and anything extra about it. **

** Did you guys know there is a poll on my page? There is and i would appreciate it if you looked at it, so far only 5 people have voted. Pein is winning right now.**

**I went to my cousins over the weekend. 14 people sharing a small house, it was fun. My cousin said she was rinsing her body and cut the shower line. She was in there for 20 minutes and my cousins were so mad they almost threw her down the stairs. Then i slept on a couch while everyone else got to share airmatresses and beds. most of my family is bed hogs so when my cousin got up to let my other cousin int he hosue she lost her spot on th bed. i slept like a log. My cousin was also conviced i'm psychic because i'm very lucky at F the dealer. Then when we were leaving my anti-social cousin pat my ehad because he's that much taller than me. My other cousin began freaking out about it because my cousin never says goodbye unless you make him. i think i'm his favorite cousin :) My grandma was stuck with us on the 4 hour drive back, she talked to ehrself about random things the entire way back. i was sitting in shot gun with the radio loud so tht neither my dad or i had to listen to her. She didn't notice.**

**I love my family. I felt like ranting. **

**End of author's ranting.**


	12. Unfair Fighting

**Author's Note:**

**Is anyone not pissed off at how long this took to update? I hope you guys were patient... Sorry bout that... Is it just me or does this Author's Note font smaller than the story?**

**Enjoy the chapter!**

* * *

"Damn Itami, what happened to you, un?" asked Deidara as I stomped into the living room. I had just gotten up and I had some nasty bruising on my face.

"Damn kid. Thinks he's so tough? If he hadn't brought out the brass knuckles I'd have had his ass." I muttered talking to myself.

"Itami, yeah?" asked Deidara as Kisame looked over at us from the TV. I jumped onto the vacant area on the empty couch and laid down before grabbing a pillow and beating it up.

"What's up, un?" asked Deidara.

"Fucking new kid in my school back in my world. Challenges me to a fair and square fight, no knives. What does he do? Bring out a fucking pair of brass knuckles! He whacked my face, almost dislocated my shoulder, wait until I get back there tomorrow. I'll show him a pair of brass knuckles!" I ranted. Deidara looked confused.

"What're brass knuckles, un?" he asked Kisame curiously. Kisame shrugged.

"How would I know? Ask Itami." said the shark.

"Itami, what're brass knuckles, hm?" asked Deidara. I glared at him for interrupting my self ranting.

"They're pieces of metal that you can put on your knuckles when you make a fist. They hurt like hell to get hit with, especially when the person hitting you has these god damn huge muscles! He was a fucking body builder, but I'll show him. I have more weapons than just knives." I muttered darkly. Deidara sighed as I went back to ranting to myself. Konan walked in and looked at me before looking to Kisame and Deidara.

"What's wrong with Itami?" asked Konan taking the empty spot on Deidara and Kisame's couch.

"Something pissed her off in her world and she's ranting about it now." said Kisame now looking over at me. I was still ranting to myself, I did know what was going on around me. Sasori walked in during my ranting as Konan went to voice another question.

"What is wrong with Itami?" he asked looking at me.

"Something pissed her off in her world." said Konan. Sasori looked at me and came over and sat next to me. He poked my bruise and I shut up and gave him a glare.

"What the hell do you want?" I growled. I was in a bad mood, obviously.

"What's your problem? And don't go off ranting again." he said.

"I was at school having a nice day." I began.

_OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo O(My new version of a line!)_

"Hey Itami!" said Sky coming over to me. She was growing her hair out and now she was able to put it in a small ponytail, I personally think she should cut it again.

"Did you hear about the new kid? He's trying to prove he's the most badass kid in the school." said Josh who had silently followed Sky.

"New kid? Yeah he was in a few of my classes, he tried to hit on me and I told him I'd cut off his dick should he not go away. He walked away after glaring at me. Reminds me of Kehoe but buffer." I reported.

"Yeah well I bet he'll challenge you, although he's probably heard of your knife history and will put down a no weapons brawl." said Sky.

"Don't let him hit you, he pretty much broke his fist though his locker in the boys locker room." said Josh.

"Hey you, piercings." Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

"What?" I asked sharply. Yes I respond to the name piercings.

"I challenge you to a fight, no knives." he said dropping his bag down. I handed mine to Sky.

"Told you." said Sky as we made room for the fight. Teachers didn't even try to stop us.

"Begin!" called some kid who had been chosen as the starter. I waited for him to charge like an idiot at me. Instead he pulled out a pair of brass knuckles from his hoodie; I could tell he was buff because he ripped the arms off.

"Not good." I heard Josh say. I turned to glare at him before I got in a fighting stance I learned from Kakuzu. He walked over to me confidently. He tried to hit me and I nimbly dodged before trying to punch his head. He had only been faking though and managed to catch my fist. I brought my leg up to kick his head in a very hard split that would be very painful if you didn't have Konan making you do them with her every day. I'm surprised I didn't tear a muscle or something.

"Woah, Itami when did you get that flexible?" I heard Sky yell in amazement. He caught my foot and I went down with one hand on the floor holding me up. I used my body weight on my other leg and swung at his stomach. He let go and pushed me over. I jumped back up like karate kid before he grabbed my hair. I yelled as he grabbed the roots and smashed his knuckles into my face. He threw me down and I jumped up slightly dazed but still able to fight. Although being thrown down made my left shoulder hurt from the beating the night before, my dad had pretty much wrenched my shoulder from its rightful place. I had to have Konan put it back, painfully might I add.

"Itami, what's wrong with your shoulder?" yelled Sky, thank you Sky for showing that my shoulder was weakened. I took a deep breath and ran to hit him. He tried to grab me and I ducked down and hit his knee. He almost fell but instead jumped and kicked me in the boobs. Now, getting kicked in the boobs hurt like hell, I do not like my chest. It is too big!

"Fuck you!" I yelled jumping up and doing a back flip hoping to kick his face. He instead caught my foot and threw me over his shoulder like a ninja. I think this guy took karate or something.

"I'm a black belt in karate sweetie." he said. I got up and he hit me in the jaw. I spit out some blood. Did I mention my piercings were hurting? They tend to hurt when being smashed by a brass knuckle. He then hit my face again and I was knocked back. I went to get up and he kicked me in the face. The starter called it for a win to him. I sat up and stood up. He was gloating. I spat out some blood and gave him a rare crazy grin, some kids took a step back. I had blood running from a cut above my head and on my cheek so I probably looked crazy.

"We're going again tomorrow, same rules. You mess with me, I will fucking mess you up!" I snarled before going back to Sky and Josh. They both worried over me and took me to the nurse who bitched at me for getting in a fight with a kid who had a weapon and I didn't. I did have a weapon, a few knives but the rule was no knives.

_OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo_

* * *

"You really got into a fight Itami?" asked Konan.

"You lost? I'd never think you'd lose, even with the disadvantage." said Kisame.

"Well excuse me, but I was still sore from getting my shoulder wrenched out and it hurts getting hit with this many piercings!" I snapped. I was defensive of the very few losses I have had.

"So what are you going to do this time, un?" asked Deidara curiously. I gave him a crazed grin.

"He thinks his brass knuckles are badass? Well I have a pair of brass knuckles that have spikes on the tip; I'd actually appreciate a small poison Sasori. One that would knock him out would be lovely." I said giving Sasori a blank stare.

"No." Cue the puppy dog eyes.

"Itami I said no." Cue pouting and puppy dog eyes.

"Itami…." I started emanating cute at this point. Sasori glared as he muttered a 'Fine damn it but stop with the cuteness!' Sasori left to go get me the poison.

"Can you teach me how to do that?" asked Kisame.

"Do what?" I asked.

"That look! The persuasion!" said Konan, also eager to learn.

"Sorry but that's one that only my brother and I can do." I said and Kisame turned back to the TV sadly. Konan pouted but it did nothing to emotionless me.

"Why not let Konan heal the bruises, yeah?" asked Deidara moving to my couch and lightly touching the bruises on my face. I had one above my left eye, one on my right cheek, and my left jaw. Then my piercings were all weird and painful from being hit.

"Because, he'll be expecting me to cover it up and I refuse to do what he wants. I will take him down showing that I am weakened, oh and I want to do some Taijutsu training! Teach me something useful!" I demanded. Sasori walked back in and handed me a vile that I placed in my jacket pocket. I let out a small yawn; I had been doing that lately. I wouldn't be tired and suddenly a random yawn would come out! It was weird. Although I am going 24-7, I should be getting tired. But I wasn't, so I should be expecting the yawns.

"Hey Itami, un?" asked Deidara.

"What?" I asked.

"Can you take a video of this fight on your IPod, or whatever those things are, hm?" asked Deidara.

"Sure." I said and with that, the day went on as normal. Including Deidara and I pranking Hidan by putting a clay scythe where his real one was. He chased us around trying to get his real scythe back while loudly swearing at us, fun.

_OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo OoOo_

"Sky, just record the damn fight!" I said handing her my IPod. She sighed and took it from me. She was determined to not get me in the fight but I was not backing down. I was going to kick this guy's ass.

"Hey sweetie, ready?" he called. He had been watching me argue with Sky. I also did a background check on him. He used to be in a gang so that's how he got his brass knuckles, oh and his name is Grimly, I laughed when I found out his name. I never knew that someone would name their kid Grimly.

"Begin!" called the kid and he pulled out his brass knuckles.

"You think I'm stupid enough to go weaponless again?" I said pulling out my knuckles and sliding them on. He saw the spikes and turned pale.

"I call these girls, Sasha and Tasha." I said as I slid them on. Grimly decided to let me go first. I ran at him and used a trick Sasori taught me. I faked a right hook before grabbing his hand that had went to grab my fake swing. I turned and pulled making him fly over my shoulder and to the side a bit. I then ran to him as he was getting up and punched him in the jaw. He fell over to the side.

"I came prepared for you too." he coughed and I yelled when he pulled out a knife.

"Hey rules say no knives asshole!" I yelled, the poison according to Sasori would take 5 minutes so I had five minutes of playing with a gang member who had a knife. At least I had Jr Switch on me; sadly the nurse still hadn't given Mr. Switch back. So Grimly had this badass huge knife and I had a switchblade that was 6 inches, greattttt.

"Now Grimly, don't make me fight you because I am better with a knife than my knuckles." I warned pulling out Jr Switch.

"And I'm in a gang sweetie." he said as I got in a switchblade stance. Would the Akatsuki count as a gang? He tried to stab me and I blocked with my blade. I went to kick out his feet but he managed to show he was stronger and push me back with the blades. He took a swing at my head and I ducked before dropping to the floor and trying to stab his leg. I missed and then rolled to the side. He got his knife stuck in the ground, our schools yard is like, really mushy and if you get like a heel or knife stuck in it, good luck getting it out.

"Itami be careful!" yelled Sky as I got up and brought my knife down onto his shoulder. He yelled and jumped up and caught me in the face with his knuckles. I was sent flying a few feet where I rolled. I think this guy is a ninja or something. I stood up shakily and checked the time. I still had 2 mintues until the poison took effect. I ran at him and pulled my fist back. He somehow got his knife out and I caught his knife in my leather gloved hand, it still cut through but at least it wasn't as painful. I brought my other fist down into his face and knocked him over. I placed a foot on his hand that was reaching for the blade.

"Match!" I called as the 5 minutes were up and he passed out. I wiped his knife on my jacket and put it in my bag; I always take my fallen enemies weapons. In this case his knife. He can keep the knuckles; I already have a pair like them. Although… I snagged them anyway. I then left for my classes with Josh and Sky following me worriedly, what if the kid sues! That was Josh's argument. My argument was 'Well how would he explain the brass knuckles? Those are illegal around here; he'd be in more trouble than me for fighting back when he pulled them out and a knife.' I love how I always win arguments against him.

_OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo_

"Itami, un?" asked Deidara sleepily. I had gone to sleep early so it was like 4 in the morning in the Naruto world and I had run out of my room, into Deidara's room that is connected to Sasori's workshop that he keeps separate and spends the night in. When I ran in I did a running jump from the bottom of Deidara's bed onto said bomber.

"Me, now you wanted to see this right?" I asked rolling off of him and lying on my back next to him. I pulled out my IPod and showed him the video of me beating Grimly up.

"You didn't kill him, un?" asked Deidara now fully awake.

"No. I don't need trouble with the law." I said before pulling something from my shirt.

"Here, these are yours now." I said dropping a pair of brass knuckles on his chest. He picked them up and looked at them curiously.

"These are his, yeah?" he asked.

"Yup, I always take my fallen enemies weapons. I also have his knife but that's mine." I said before grabbing Deidara's pillow and using it as a head rest as I watched Deidara play with the brass knuckles.

"Thanks Itami, yeah." he said before putting the knuckles on the table next to his bed.

"What time is it, hm?" asked Deidara with a yawn making me yawn. I checked my IPod's clock, it somehow changes times in each world.

"…3:45." I said blankly. Ok so it was a bit earlier than expected. Deidara groaned and grabbed the pillow I was using and used it to try and smother me.

"Don't wake me up at such a time, yeah!" he groaned before putting his head on the pillow still on me and pretty much passing out. I glared at him. But I stayed still to let him sleep, I did wake him up early and I didn't mind. I had nothing else to do anyway. Now I couldn't fall asleep but I could get lost in a daydream and that is exactly what I did. Of course I wasn't thinking at the time so when morning came, I found us in an interesting position.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**Voila! Over 2700 words because it was late. By like 2 weeks...**

**Q/A-I think the last question scared everyone because no one answered it... i don't even have an answer for it. But if i thought up a song to fit Insomnia... Wide Awake by Katy Perry, its the best i could do...but i'm not a big Katy perry person, i'm more Three Days Grace, Breaking Benjamin, Evanescence, etc.**

**Q-Well no one answered the last question so hopefully you do answer this one! The question of the chapter is-What do you think will happen to Itami when she wakes up? She's in a compromising position in Deidara's bed, he's usually the first up in the base but he also has Sasori awake 24-7 and who knows what the othersz might do.**

**...What do i have to rant about today? Does anyone even like my rants? Probably not... Eh if you want my latest rant then go and check out my new story, Insane! Its only 3 chapters so far...**

**Now the poll on my page is still up! Insane isn't because of the poll, the poll is for my next major story! So far Pein is winning and tied for second is Deidara and Sasori. Then Kakashi, Neji, Shikamaru, and Tobi/Madara are tied for 3rd...only 6 people have voted. That irks me.**

** Oh and does anyone know where i can get a sweatshirt that says 'Bite me' on it? I want one and i have no idea where to get one.**

**END!**


	13. Fuck

**Author's Note-**

**An early chapter before school starts! Hell yeah!**

* * *

Snickering. I did not like the snickering. Had Deidara not been using me as a pillow I'd have turned around and thrown my switchblade at the familiar snickering.

"Hey bitch, you having fun there?" called Hidan, Deidara was a heavy sleeper. He wouldn't have woken up by just Hidan's yelling.

"Shut the hell up and get me out of this position! And why are you not sleeping? You usually wake up last." I whisper yelled. Hidan snickered.

"I had my ritual this morning, then I was passing by and thought to wake that pyro bastard up but found you fucking in here." said Hidan. He smirked when he noticed his word choice made me twitch.

"Get me out of this position so I can gut you!" I yelled. Deidara didn't even move from my yelling. Is he unconscious or something?

"I think I'm going to get the bastard puppet so I can show him, he'd fucking die if he saw this."

"Damn it Hidan!" I screamed as I heard his laughing disappear down the hall. I moved around and cursed Deidara for fuc-I'd actually rather not say that work, let me go with skipping that. Anyway I cursed Deidara for somehow hugging me in his sleep. He managed to somehow get us in an intimate position too, and Hidan saw it. Now I had to wake up Hidan before Sasori came in and then I would really die. I moved so that I was facing Deidara. I put my mouth next to his head.

"DAMN IT WAKE UP DEIDARA BEFORE I KILL YOU!" I yelled in his ear. He woke up and jumped up. Bad part being we both fell off the bed landing us in the most awkward of positions on the floor, with the sheet tangled around us.

"Deidara." I said calmly, Deidara looked ready to shit his pants.

"Mind telling me why after showing you the brass knuckles you decided to use me as a pillow. And also I think you deserve to know that Hidan saw us and left to get Sasori to show him, and would you so kindly MOVE?!" If only the sheets hadn't tangled us, then we wouldn't have seen such a horrifying sight.

"See? I fucking told you!" yelled Hidan. In the doorway was not only Sasori, who started laughing like a maniac, but Konan. But back to the horrifying part, Sasori was laughing! He was laughing. Sasori does not laugh. Ever. Deidara and I finally got untangled and I turned to them. I pointed at Sasori and had a total Sky moment.

"Imposter! Sasori doesn't laugh! It's not even funny!" I said, almost yelled. Everyone stared at me and the weird face I was making was making Sasori laugh harder. Konan ignored the now laughing Sasori and all out tackled me. She started to violently shake me.

"What were you doing with Deidara? You're too young to lose your innocenceeeeeeee!" cried Konan shaking me harder.

"We didn't do anything, un!" yelled Deidara waving his hands around, I blame Deidara if anything. It's his fault for falling asleep on me. Konan and I's yelling brought the attention of Kisame and Itachi. Kisame started chuckling and Itachi merely raised an eyebrow before calmly leaving. Then of course Tobi had to come. He at least tackled Konan screaming something about 'Saving Itami-chan!' Sasori had finally stopped being OOC at this point and was staring at us.

"Itami, you are a very good liar, how do we know you're not lying?" asked Sasori, damn him. He's got a point.

"Deidara-senpai! Itami-chan isn't lying!" yelled Tobi.

"Yeah, un! We did nothing!" yelled Deidara.

"I say you fucked." said Hidan. Deidara and I glared at him. I pulled my switchblade from my pocket and nailed Hidan between the eyes.

"Sasori aren't ninja's supposed to have great reflexes?" I asked the puppet. Sasori looked at Hidan who pulled the switchblade from his face and glared at me. He started violently swearing, no I wasn't trying to create a distraction. Pssh I'm not lying!

"Yes." said Sasori blankly.

"Hidan you're not very ninja." I said.

"Fuck you bastard puppet! And fuck you pierced bitch! Oh wait, Deidara already fucking did!" laughed Hidan.

"Shut the hell up bastard! We did nothing!" I yelled trying to leap at Hidan.

"Well there is only one way to find out." stated Konan.

"And that is?" I asked.

"We can have Itachi go through your memories with his Sharingan." realized Kisame, he had been pretty quiet until then.

"Tobi will go get Itachi-san!" screeched Tobi running out of the room.

"Great." I said leaning against the wall.

"Oi bitch, I'm hungry, make us some damn food." snapped Hidan.

"Make your own fucker!" I snapped back.

"I'm not the fucker here." said Hidan with a grin. Konan and Deidara held me back from tackling the Jashinist. They held me back until Itachi came in with Tobi. I glared right into Itachi's Sharingan. We held a staring contest for about 10 seconds.

"Well? Are you going to do something?" I snapped. Itachi blinked, his eyes narrowed and he glared at me. I think that if he glared any harder I would burst into flames.

"Well?" I asked.

"I can't get into your mind." said Itachi, he glared at me more.

"Maybe it's from her chakra being in her blood." suggested Sasori. Itachi hned and left.

"Wait does that mean that things like Genjutsu and stuff won't work on me?" I asked. That would make my life easier; I wouldn't have to watch out for Genjutsu that I have no idea on how to get out of.

"Most likely." said Konan.

"How are we going to know if they fucked?" I am going to one day find out how to kill Hidan. He just had to bring that back up, didn't he!

"I hate you." I said blankly, Konan snorted, Deidara chuckled, Sasori stared, and Hidan glared.

"You know what? I don't care what you guys think, I'm going to go and make breakfast for Deidara and I. Kakuzu will get some too since he didn't do anything to not deserve it!" I snapped. Konan pouted at me.

"Itami none of the guys can cook though!" stated Konan.

"Too bad, c'mon Deidara." I said and Deidara followed me with a grin.

After breakfast I had training, we were training outside since it was a nice day out. I was training with Kakuzu, Sasori, Deidara, Hidan, and Kisame. So basically they were all watching me get my ass kicked by Kisame who was upset I didn't make him pancakes like I did for Kakuzu, Deidara, Pein, and myself.

"Fuck!" I swore as Kisame managed to hit me with a large stick. He wasn't allowed to use an actual sword, we were practicing sword fighting, with sticks, I was losing horribly.

"It's your fault." said Sasori calmly; he doesn't eat so he didn't care.

"Fuck you bastard puppet." I muttered as Kisame knocked me into a tree with his stick.

"Can I give up yet?" I asked, I had been trying to forfeit for the last hour too. Kisame said that a real swordsman didn't give in.

"A real swordsman doesn't quit!" sang Kisame as he whacked me with his sword again.

"I'm not a man, and should this be a real fight I'd be dead." I pointed out as he whacked my face earning a 'FUCKKKK!' because he hit my piercings.

"Deidara, Kakuzu, Sasori, save me!" I yelled as Kisame poked me with his big stick before using it to pin me down. Damn shark man.

"Why would I save you?" asked Sasori.

"How much would I get?" asked Kakuzu.

"Sorry Itami, un." said Deidara.

"You fucking deserve it." said Hidan laughing his ass off. I'll kill him one day, fuck Shikamaru I'll kill him!

"Fine we can stop, I hope you learned your lesson." said Kisame. I clapped my hands and continued to lie on the floor. Kakuzu used his strings to pick me up and put me on my feet.

"We're going in, you can stay out and practice more." said Sasori leaving me with Deidara. I sighed and leaned against a tree.

"Deidara." I stated.

"Un?" asked the bomber.

"Why didn't you help me?" I asked irritably.

"Sorry, un. Kisame could probably kick my ass when he's mad, yeah." said Deidara. I nodded.

"I'm going to go and get some clay, I'll be back out in a minute, un." said Deidara leaving me alone. I sighed and banged my head into the tree.

"I hate training." I muttered to myself. Deidara came back with some clay.

"Hey Itami, read to train more, un?" asked Deidara holding up some clay, crap. Not more!

_0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0(I was going to stop here but added the end just because i've been late on my updates lately and school is starting so who knows when i'll update next)_

I stared at the computer screen before blinking. I blinked and pointed at the screen. I was on my computer at home staring at the latest manga I got off the internet. Someone must be shitting me.

"Jack, Chris! Get in the death trap!" I yelled running down the stairs. Jack and Chris looked up from the floor where they were wrestling and followed me out. I leaned against their car as Chris went in and got the keys.

"What's the hurry Itami?" asked Jack.

"Get me to the bookstore, now! I don't care how far over the speed limit we are, now!" I snapped. Chris came out and we got in the car. Normally I'd avoid the car at all costs, but now? I need these two drivers in their beat up car to get me to the store where I can buy the latest manga for myself!

We drove at least 30 over the speed limit, almost crashed 20 times, I almost had a heart attack 10 times, and when we parked we left skid marks. I jumped out with Jack and Chris following me curiously. I walked into the store calmly, but I was feeling the opposite of calm. The bookstore clerk, Violet, waved at me.

She was another person I could stand; she was 18 and a senior at my school. She's incredibly smart with bleach blonde white hair with violet streaks. Then she has actual purple eyes, it's genetic in her family and I asked if she would please go into surgery to switch eyes with me. I love her eyes, they're purple! And she loves my eyes, 'They're bi-colored!' she would say; basically we love each other's eyes.

"The new manga is in!" she called. I ran over to her, all calmness forgotten. I ripped the book from her hand and turned to the last few pages. There was the proof I needed. Then I yawned randomly, but I was doing that more and more these days.

Tobi is Obito. Mind fucked? Yes.

"Well? Why are you just staring at it?...and why did you yawn at it?" asked Violet. She was a huge Naruto fan too but she isn't allowed to read manga in the store while on desk duty, so usually she asks me what happens.

"Tobi is Obito." I said and she fist pumped the air.

"Yes I knew it! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!" she sang spinning around. Violet was a bit like Sky only Violet can be responsible at times and she is obsessed with Naruto like me. Sky however is not; she's obsessed with art and Josh.

"Here" I said tossing her the money. She waved as I left. Jack was staring in the window at Violet, did I mention Jack had a crush on Violet? No? Well he does.

"C'mon lover boy, I've got a manga that I must memorize." I said already reading the book again. Chris snorted from the driver's seat as I tricked Jack into sitting in the back seat. Jack only realized after we started driving at high speeds.

"Hey Itami what's got you hooked on that book so bad?" asked Jack later on. I had actually willingly sat with my brothers; only because I was too busy memorizing the manga to care though. I shoved the page at Jack's face.

"Tobi is Obito! Can you believe it?" I asked. Jack, who only played my video games but recognized the characters from Ninja Storm Generations, stared at me.

"You're more obsessed than Chris and his Bleach." said Jack. Chris glared at him from where he was on his laptop with headphones in. He was watching Bleach.

"Yeah well you're obsessed with Violet." retorted Chris. Jack was ready to tackle him and would have had Chris not been holding their shared laptop. I memorized the book, put it in my large bookcase of Naruto manga, and then banked my head into the wall.

Why?

Now I can never look at Tobi the same ever again. And my mouth that is usually quiet might blurt something out that will get me killed.

Fuck.

* * *

**Author's Note-**

**I'm sad because it deleted my entire authors note at first and now i have to retype it :(**

**Ok so i have a stomach ache, that pisses me off greatly. I have no idea why too, its not that time of month, I've barely eaten anything other than dinner, i haven't done much altely, i'm most likely not sick, so why the hell have i been getting stomach aches for the past few days? It ruined my first Softball practice Friday because i couldn't move from the pain. And i was tired. If anyone can tell me why i'm having these stomach aches or give me advice on how to get them to fucking go away i will be very grateful. Oh it might be my medicine, but it hasn't happened before now... **

**Fun Fact-Blood hates running, school, and stomach aches. She can give a rant on why she hates them too.**

**I hate school. I don't want to go back Tuesday, i hate most of the people and school and i hate getting up before noon. Its unjashinly and i hate it. it takes forever to wake me up too. I also don't have my friend to walk with this year because he graduated, now i can't scream 'Take Joey!' and run away if someone tries to steal us. I'm such a great friend aren't i? I would only do that to Joey, i'd kill myself for my other friends(The very few i have). Joey is bigger than me however so i trust that he could fight someone better than me. Just in size though, i'm more ninja than him.**

**My grandma has a new dog and asked what i wanted to name it. My suggestions were Deidara, Akamaru, and Neji. My mum told me these were stupid and that she'd never heard them before. I told her i was insulted and rudely pointed at her while i declared this loudly.(We had a conversation on the Akatsuki an hour previous too, i was very insulted by my mum). My mum suggested Pickachu, my dad suggested Muttley, and my grandma had Buddy up. My grandma now has a Beagle named Pickachu, he's adorable and loves to lick you. I saw him today, i had a stomach ache though so i couldn't give him love. I had to sit. Damn stomach ache.**

**Simplicity-Shitsuboku(Sorry if i mispelled it) You were the only one who put in an answer for that question, i think it was chapter 11's question. Paradise by Coldplay is now my favorite song. you get special mention because of this.**

_**Q-Ok, a question... hm... who else despises school? And have you already started school?**_

**_A-Uhhh... the question was... oh yeah, what'd you think Itami was going to wake up to. Well... i already answered that._ **

**Oh! I was going to use puppet bitch but i think that it was used in DaniZaraki's kitty trilogies and i really ddin't want to have her one me, i like her story and would rather not have her get pissed off at me. If you want a good story that i love read DaniZaraki's kitty trilogy, i have the second one in my favorites. I'm too lazy to put the first and third in my favorites. I'm a lazy bitch, get over it.**

**My neighbors grandson almost choked because of me. i stuffed the entire huge strip of steak in my mouth and then began to chew for like... 10 minutes. He decided that since he's a boy he can do it too, he ended up choking on it. His mom flipped out on him. I found it funny. Poor 10 year old. I'm older than him, the reason i was over there was because i can see them over the fence from my deck and the two children saw me and yelled for me to come over. I like their pool and i like seeing them so i went. We had fun, i hit the boy in the face with a football in the water. It amused me how he tried hitting me and i'd easily dodge. I'm so much more ninja than he is.**

**Does anybody even care about my rants? And am i forgetting anything? Oh shit... this rant is fucking HUGE. Sorry bout that... ranting helped me forget my stomach ache.**

**Ta-ta **


	14. Manners

**Authors Note:**

** I hate school. It sucks up my life. **

**Enjoy this sucky fast made chapter thati really just bullshited through.**

* * *

Manners

"Why is Itami-chan staring at Tobi?" asked Tobi. We were eating and Tobi of course had my attention. I found out he's Obito! Of course it was a week ago, but I just can't help but stare!

"No reason." I said absently as I stabbed my food and shoved it in my mouth.

"Itami, you need to be more ladylike." announced Konan. Oh shit not this again. I blinked at her.

"Not you too!" I groaned dropping my head onto my empty plate. Konan pulled my head up by my hair and wiped my face before putting a napkin in my lap. Then she dropped my head back into my plate. Hidan and Deidara snickered at me while Kisame chuckled. I glared at them.

"Why don't you yell at them for being slobs?" I asked Konan.

"Because they're men, you're a woman." said Konan. I groaned. I really did not want this talk.

"I've already been signed up for lady classes in my world, I don't need them here too!" I snapped. My mother decided that I wasn't ladylike and so, she used the computer and with Jack and Chris's help, I am now signed up for classes. I have one the next day, or when I change worlds.

"That's going to be torture for you, un." said Deidara.

"Shut it! You look like a girl!" I snapped. He put his hands on the table and leaned across at me.

"What'd you say, un?!" yelled Deidara. I met him in the same position.

"I don't believe I stuttered but if you want me to say it again, YOU LOOK LIKE A GIRL." I hissed. Deidara then proceeded to jump over the table and tackle me. I yelled and started pulling his hair as he pulled my legs into uncomfortable positions. It was like a game of say uncle, or you just fight until Kakuzu tells you to stop. Konan grabbed both of our ponytails and yanked us apart.

"Both of you will be taking manners courses as punishment!" snapped Konan. Deidara's mouth dropped.

"But I'm not a damn female, yeah!" yelled Deidara as Sasori walked in. He took in the situation.

"You look like one brat." said Sasori before he came over.

"I will be teaching you." decided Konan with a nod. I groaned and fell back letting my head hit the floor with a loud crack.

"FUCK!" I yelled getting smacked on the back of my head by Konan.

"Ladies don't swear like Hidan!" snapped Konan. I glared at her.

"Fine then, damn it!" I yelled. Konan sighed.

"I've got a long way to go." she said and everyone who was watching snickered. Deidara and I simultaneously groaned. Manners? I hate manners. It means no swearing, no fighting, and no looking like I do. This is going to be fun.

o0oo0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o 

Blue clashed with green and blue. It was a battle between siblings. It was a glaring contest between Jack and me.

"Mom said you have to go." said Jack.

"I do not need to take a ladies course!" I snapped. Jack sighed before he and Chris tackled me. I yelled as they each grabbed my feet and arms and carried me to the car. I was thrown and locked in the back as they got in. I glared at my brothers the entire way to the community center. Then they had to drag me in with me threatening them. They're lucky I love them or else they'd be dead by now.

"Itami Duncan!" announced Jack throwing me into a chair and fleeing with Chris.

"When I get my hands on you!" I shouted as they fled. I looked around the course, 3 sluts, 4 shy girls, 5 punks, and 2 Goths plus me, so 15 in the class total. I glared at the bunch as I sat next to the only girl in the class I wouldn't punch in the face, Kirai.

Kirai was an albino with bright pink tinted eyes that looked clouded, pale skin, and white hair. She was extremely sensitive to the sun. She was a Goth, and she was half blind in one eye and color blind. I nodded in approval at her attire. She only wore black, white, and red because she knew black and white went with everything and then she liked the color red because that was her favorite color before her eyes lost their ability to see color. Unfortunately she's 18 so not in my grade.

"Itami, I loved your entrance." she said smirking. The teacher looked us over; she was an older woman with graying blonde hair and sharp blue eyes.

"Alright ladies." she started. Her voice reminded me of those strict ladies with the high voices. She also had a pointy nose.

"Sup?" greeted a punk kid.

"It is not ladylike to say 'sup' it is ladylike to say hello, good morning, good afternoon, good evening, and greetings. Do not say 'sup'." said the woman. The girl who spoke waved her off.

"My name is Ms C, you may call me Ms C." stated the woman. I remember who she reminds me of. That lady from Sims 2 who hit you with her purse.

"Now you are all here to learn how to be ladies." she said looking us over.

"No dying your hair" she glared at me and a girl with neon green hair, apparently dark red is not a natural color. But it's natural for me, I'm going to have a great time explaining that.

"No piercings" she glared at me and another punk girl who had 1 on her eyebrow and 1 on her nose.

"No improper language" she glared at the girl from before and glared at my shirt, I happened to be wearing my dark red sweatshirt that said 'Fuck off!'.

"No ripped jeans, biker boots, or crude sayings" I think she's coming up with these rules while looking at me because all she's doing is glaring at me!

"And finally, always wear a sundress to class. I happen to have some we can look through for this 4 hour class." she said giddily. Great way to spend my Saturday right? Four hours in hell. She pulled in a cart that had a bunch of bright sundresses on it. I stared at it.

"Hey Ms Bitch, I'm not wearing a dress, something that color, or something that shows my arms." I said. The woman's eyes narrowed at me. She put a line next to my name.

"Every line you get is an accessory you have to add to your dress." she said. I face palmed. Bad idea.

"FUCK!" I yelled earning myself another line. But seriously that fucking hurt because my piercings. I looked to see a few girls had already thrown on the dress, the shy girls, the sluts, and the other Goth girl. Kirai however was glaring at them; right she could only tell black and white apart, the rest is all different shades of gray. I took my spot next to her with the bright green haired punk girl. We glared at them and refused to put them on.

"Put them on or else I call your parole officer Liana, your mother Itami, and your father Kirai." threatened Ms C. We glared at her but went and grabbed a dress each. I pulled it on over my shirt and left my sweatshirt on over it.

"There, I'm accessorizing." I said and Ms C glared at me but accepted it. I didn't like the dress it was light yellow, but I was stuck with it. The rest of the class was Ms C against Kirai, the punk girl Liana, and me.

When Jack picked me up he and Chris had brought some trash can lids for shields. I started making choking motions at them but got in the car. We drove home quickly and in a deadly way too. I got out and went upstairs and refused to come out. I was mad at my family. I locked my door and then went to sleep.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0 o0o0o0o0o0o

"Bite me." I snapped. Konan was trying to get me to use the right eating utensils that for some reason the base had. The guys were amusing themselves by watching us. She was also making Deidara learn some table manners. Truthfully I had learned table manners in the ladies thing that day; I just refused to use them.

"No." I said as Konan glared at me.

"Do it!" she hissed.

"Never!" I hissed back. Deidara calmly tried to eat his food correctly, but he couldn't. Same reason as mine, he just didn't want to!

"Its not hard!" snapped Konan.

"To you!" I snapped back

"Hey, un." interrupted Deidara receiving 2 heated glares.

"Can we just skip this lesson and say we did it, un?" asked Deidara.

"No!" snapped Konan.

"I agree with Deidara!" I announced. I dropped my utensils in the sink and ate my food quickly. Konan sighed and hit her head against the table.

"I'm not done yet." announced Konan leaving to prepare something.

"You two are so screwed." said Kisame.

"Bitch, you're going to need a whole fucking lot of luck. Pray to Jashin." said Hidan. I put my hands in a praying position.

"Oh Jashin-sama, please give me the strength and luck to make it through this horrible manners course." I prayed. Kisame was shaking with laughter that he was trying, and failing, at holding in. Deidara was chuckling and Hidan looked proud.

"I'm a Jashinist now, I'm just not going to kill people." I announced.

"Me too, un!" said Deidara. Deidara and I clinked glasses.

"To our luck, (un)." we said before chugging it down.

"They're going to need their luck." commented Kakuzu to Sasori.

"I think it will be entertaining to watch the brat get his ass handed to him by Itami. Itami already knows the manners, I can tell by her eyes, she just doesn't want to use them." said Sasori with a chuckle.

"Hey bastard puppet, don't tell Konan that." I snapped. Sasori and Kakuzu chuckled at us. I hate them, bastard puppets and greedy bastards.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"You must walk up these stairs without these books falling off your head." announced Konan, she had Deidara and I take out our hair for this. Neither of us could see very well since it was in our eyes. I felt a few pounds on my head.

"Konan, un. We can't see!" said Deidara. Konan snapped her fingers.

"Go!" she shouted. I took a step forward with my face forward. I simply walked forward slowly. Deidara on the other hand dropped his books onto my foot.

"Jashin damn it!" I yelled clutching my foot and falling onto Deidara. Our books collapsed around us. Deidara sighed and I sat up on him. I grabbed a book.

"Konan?" I asked as Deidara looked at the book I was holding.

"What?" asked Konan with a groan.

"Why do you have an Icha Icha Paradise book?" I asked. Konan turned beet red.

"Konan, are you a closet perv, un?" asked Deidara.

"No!" yelled Konan walking out. Kakuzu was handed money by Sasori as Kisame and Hidan snorted with laughter.

"Hey what'd you guys bet on?" I asked.

"Who fell first." said Kakuzu.

"I figured the brat walked with his head straight." said Sasori.

"Next!" yelled Konan. Deidara and I groaned in unison, when will it end?

"Why the hell am I doing this again, yeah!?" exclaimed Deidara. Konan's next method was word play. Basically complement each other nicely. So she had Deidara and I sitting across from each other.

"You have nice hair, un." said Deidara.

"You have nice eyes." I said glaring at him.

"You have a nice… personality, hm?" tried Deidara.

"You have a great view on art?" I stated as Sasori laughed at Deidara's 'compliment' that was stated as a question.

"You have a unique hair style." said Deidara.

"How is that a fucking compliment?" I asked.

"Unique isn't necessarily bad!" said Deidara holding up his hands, I got tongues stuck at me from them. I glared at him.

"Well then, you have _unique_ mouths." I spat. Deidara glared at me.

"You have a unique face, yeah!" said Deidara.

"Jashin damn you!" I yelled launching myself at Deidara. We barreled over and began pulling each other's hair and punching each other.

"Nagato, Yahiko, help me." muttered Konan as Sasori handed Kakuzu more money.

"I bet Deidara would snap first." muttered Sasori. Kakuzu was most likely smirking under his mask. Kisame and Hidan were yelling at us, Kisame telling me to go for his hair and Hidan telling me to go for his face.

"Next!' yelled Konan in despair.

"I think you should just put them in fucking dresses." stated Hidan. Konan smirked at us. Crap. Deidara and I froze, him having me in a headlock and me pulling his hair.

"RUN, un!" yelled Deidara. I followed after him as he fled the living room. We ran down the hall to find a wall of paper awaiting us.

"Well Deidara, it's been fun but we're going to be sent to hell now." I said.

"It was fun Itami, yeah." said Deidara as we were dragged to different rooms.

I glared at myself in the mirror. Konan had my hair in a weird bun on my head that made my hair kind of like a flat cone shape. Then she took out most of my facial piercings and then tried to take out my bars but I threatened to ruin my makeup if she did. Yup, I had dark green eye shadow and black eyeliner. And some blush with some lip gloss. I had a dark green dress with a fancy black coat. Then Konan made me wear fancy black shoes, the horror!

Deidara was pouting and that made me pull my IPod from my bra and snap a picture of him. He glared at me but didn't move. His hair was down and pulled back in two pigtails with light blue ribbon. He had an Alice in Wonderland style blue dress with tights and everything. I can't believe she even got the poor guy in a dress.

"The faster you act proper, the faster you get out of these clothes." said Konan. Deidara and I shared a look. We ran to the kitchen and as Konan slowly followed us I pointed out the different utensils to Deidara who soaked up the knowledge. We did that right, then we had to walk with the books. I made it up the stairs and back 5 times, Deidara made it once before he tripped, he's no exactly used to heels. I laughed, until the Icha Icha book hit my head from where he fell at the top of the stairs. Finally we had the compliment thing. We sat with fake smiles etched onto our faces; we were even using fake high voices.

"Why Dei-chan, you have such beautiful hair!" I squealed, ew.

"No, Itami-chan, you have fabulous hair, yeah." said Deidara.

"Well you have the prettiest eyes I have ever seen!" I said.

"And you have the most unique eyes, they're such beautiful and rare shades." added Deidara.

"Well Dei-chan, you have the most beautiful way of expressing art." I said.

"Why thank you Itami-chan, you have the most _beautiful _music on your IPod." said Deidara with a sarcastic tint, he was tired of complimenting me. I was bored of complimenting him too.

"Well, you Dei-chan have the flattest chest I have ever seen." I said with eyes narrowed.

"And you Itami-chan, have the biggest one I have ever seen." I set myself up for that one. I stood up and took off my heels ready to fight. Deidara did the same.

"And you, Dei-chan-" I started.

"Ok, you're done." interrupted Konan quickly before a fight could break out. Not 3 seconds later Deidara and I had fled to our rooms where we both stripped and jumped into our showers. I was extremely happy when I got out into my usual comfy clothes. Then I met Deidara in the hall where we promptly tackled each other and began fighting. We were continuing from before.

The moral? Use manners children, or else you will end up like that.

* * *

**Author's Note**

** Short authors note today. Im supposed to be doing homework at the moment. **

** Reason i have not updated in forever- I had school, i'm in 3 hnors classes that pile on homework, hell my Studi class even gives homework! I hate homework. Next reason, i had a 4 day weekend this past weekend, problem was last Wendsay i came home reado to speed through my homework and watch the Hidan and Kakuzu arc when y dad tells me we're switcing companies so i had no internet until today. I was in a bitter mood for the past week.**

**I hate summer reaing, its due in two days, i have only read the books, not written the essay yet. I also have a tech essay due on that same day, no i have not started that either. i also have softball 2 days a week and thn 1 game saturday followed by one on sunday. Then guitar mondays, so far only Thursdays i have nothing. I'm tired too and i have softball in an hour, and my knee hurts from playing catcher. **

** School... now i could write a rant as long as the story using my teachers but i'll just say this since you probably don't care, my math teacher(1st period, ughhh and its an honors class) is obsessed with goldfish and enjoys pelting you with tasty treats(Starbursts) and he also throws the calculators at you. My Spanish teacher is also insane and i have more but i reaally need to get going on homework.**

**I wanted to address some more shit in this note but i'm in a hurry.**

**Imma try and update this weekend, i've been writing chapters in school. **

**Q-...ok what are some things you hate? Just list them, its the best thing i cant hink of at the moment**

**An-I hate school, i think that was the question anyway.**

**Audios (I'm taking Spanish, i wanna learn Japanese but nooo my school sucks and only offers Spanish, Italian and French)**


	15. Twisting Problems

**An:**

**I went mining and guess what I dug up? A plotline!... I know, that sucks. Basically here comes the start of the plotline again. **

**Enjoy this chapter, that is short and was written in-between periods, lunch, and snooping teachers trying to decipher what I was writing.**

* * *

"No." Kakuzu was not amused.

"Hell no." Hidan was giving Tobi a look.

"Not in this lifetime." Sasori gave me a look. Right, my idea.

"Hell to the fucking no." I glared at Tobi and Sasori.

"Never, un." Deidara looked at Tobi like he was poisonous.

"No thanks." Konan was trying, and failing, at keeping the expression of horror off her face.

"Not a chance." Kisame snorted while Itachi just glared at Tobi before calmly leaving. Zetsu phased through the ground.

"PLEASE?!" pleaded Tobi.

"No." we all snapped again. You want to know what Tobi wanted, right? Well he was going through the base because he was bored and I told him to look for something to do, that's when he found it.

"But Tobi wants to play Twister!" cried Tobi. Yup, he found Twister. No one wanted to play. My 6th sense was acting up; I could sense something bad would happen.

"Tobi thinks you're all too scared." decided Tobi. That hit a few egos.

"Fine damn it!" snapped Hidan.

"Fine yeah!" yelled Deidara.

"I'll play." agreed Kakuzu and Kisame, both with a sigh. Tobi looked at Konan and I.

"Fine." said Konan reluctantly. I groaned and nodded.

"I hate you." I decided as Tobi set up the spinner. Kisame and Kakuzu, the large and lucky bastards got to be the spinners. I repeat, Lucky bastards.

We started off good, spread out and mostly with 1 foot on a color. Then about 7 rounds went until we got irritated.

"You better move your face." I growled at Hidan who I was nose to nose with.

"Shut up bitch." he snapped as he began to wobble from talking.

"Itami-chan! Right hand green!" called Tobi, who had been pushed over in the 5th round by a pissed off Deidara. If he hadn't of done it I would have done it.

"Fuck." I swore, that brought Hidan's face into my large breast area. Hidan was grinning perversely. I decided to knock him over.

"FALL DAMN IT!" I yelled in his face while head butting him. Hidan swore violently as he fell back, taking Sasori to the ground with him.

"Damn you bitch." muttered Hidan as Sasori scowled at him. Sasori wasn't too unhappy though, he began betting on us with Kakuzu.

"Come on Konan!" called Sasori. At that moment said blunette was doing a back bend with her legs crossed, very difficult.

"Deidara!" snapped Kakuzu. I gave them all glares.

"Who's going for me?" I snapped.

"You're not a ninja, you have little chance of winning." said Kakuzu, I glared at said miser.

"We will." decided Kisame, dragging Hidan's choice with his. Although Hidan didn't particularly care on who won, he just wanted to piss us off and get something embarrassing to happen.

"I love you two, the rest of you all suck." I announced as Deidara moved so that he had one arm across my stomach. Kisame and Hidan were nice, they betted on me. Kakuzu and Sasori could go die in a hole. Then Deidara sucked because he just did, Konan because she was pushing me, and Tobi because this is his entire fault.

"Hot." commented Hidan a few minutes later. I was face to face with Konan while Deidara was holding himself over me with about an inch keeping us apart. Konan's legs were entwined with Deidara and I's, if one goes down we all go down.

"You fall, I kill you." I informed Deidara. He chuckled and I glared at him, his breath had hit me in the face. We were too close for comfort.

"No worries, un." said Deidara as Konan moved her legs. She wobbled but held up.

"Itami, left hand blue!" called Kisame. I growled as I cautiously moved my hand under me, I really didn't care if I fell. I did care though that if I fell, Deidara was going to come down on top of me. And we were in a very, intimate position to fall in. Hidan would have a field day if we fell.

"Don't fall, yeah!" muttered Deidara as his hand moved to under me. I think Tobi rigged the game so this would happen. I swear, he'd have had to! There is no way an actual game of Twister you'll actually get twisted up like this!

"Deidara, fall." chuckled Kisame. I threw said shark a dirty look as Deidara muttered a "Shut the hell up, fish sticks, un" Kisame responded by grinning at us.

"What would you fuckers do if I pushed you?" asked Hidan with a grin.

"Maim you." said Konan getting into a split position.

"Turn you into art, un." said Deidara as he balanced over me with all his support on the hand he had under me. His hand mouths were also eating the mat.

"Torture, maim, castrate, then starve you. Then I'd cut you into a bunch of pieces, feed you to Zetsu and if you're still alive, bury you alive so that you'll never be heard from ever again after burning you with Itachi's fire Jutsu." I replied as I got into a bridge with my hand almost touching Deidara's supporting arm.

"Damn, you better not push her." said Kisame with a grin and whistle.

"Damn." said Konan as her arm gave out and she fell. Good thing, we had more room. Bad thing, she knocked into Deidara.

"Shit." said Sasori as he lost the bet he had with Kakuzu. He handed over the money. Deidara was wobbling from Konan hitting him; if he fell we were in some deep shit.

"Itami, un?" asked Deidara. He sounded sheepish. Not good.

"What?" I asked hesitantly while sending Jashin prayers to keep him from falling.

"Sorry, yeah." and with a quick "Fuck!" from me Deidara crashed down onto me. I was able to hold us up for a full 3 seconds, enough for Kisame and Hidan to win their bet on me. Then the weight of Deidara, a full 120lbs, so like 30lbs more than me, made my arms buckle. I proceeded to collapse and fall on the floor. Then…

Silence

Everyone gawked at the frozen pair of Deidara and I. Why were we frozen? Well, when I collapsed we landed with Deidara on top of me. Deidara had been right over me, nose to nose. We landed in a pretty intimate position and we were stuck with our arms under me. Then since we were nose to nose, our body's lined up in an awkward position. That meant that we were caught lip locked. And so, we were kissing. And we were frozen in shock. It took 5 seconds and a whistle and "Damn!" from Hidan to snap Deidara and I out of it. We separated and rolled away from each other. My following reaction?

"FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKK!" I'm pretty sure Konoha could hear me. I'm also pretty sure that its becoming my catchphrase. And so I repeat.

Fuck.

* * *

**AN:**

**Well, this chapters a midget. Its because i wrote it in school so i couldn't use the word count. **

**ANYWAY, plotline. Yes i have finally found the plotline again. We'll be seeing the Hidan and Kakuzu arc soon. i plan on planning this one out more. **

** Now i have time because i finished my two essays due tomorrow. I will also try to update on the weekend, but i have 2 softball games, 1 on each day so who knows if i'll have time. **

**I'm in a bad mood. Reasons for my mood**

** 1-school work **

**2-younger students that piss me off **

**3-We got a new cooku(How the fuck do you spell it?) clock, i liked our ancient one better. This ones loud, has a fucking annoying and loud noise that sounds like a horse then birds then a scratchy noise. And its right by my room! It goes off in the middle of the night and its not on time. I hate it. I'm thinking of either, A-Breaking it by throwing something at it B-Making my dad get rid of it or C-Hiding it from everyone, or breaking it a nicer way. **

**4-I think i screwed my knee up. It hurts to move it and i can't even crack it anymore! I always used to crack it. And my elbows hurt too. Damn softball.**

**5-I have an obnoxious asshole sitting next to me invading my personal space Mr N is a moron, he has our desks so close together! And of course this asshole i my partner at my two person desk. but really, my backpack(No locker use for me again this year! Woo!) takes up the small aisle bhind and next to me. I hate the set-up, no personal space) in Science. We had to work together today. We insulted each other for half the period, the other half we actually did the work. More or less me doing it and him following along slowly and copying. He also triped pushing me out of my chair so i proceeded to elbow him and call him a damned moron. He also tried cheating off my test today. When Mr N wasn't looking i grabbed my binder that was seperating us, smacked him in the head with it, and proceeded to do my test.**

**6-I had practice tonight, 2 softball games tomorrow, and 1 on Sunday. OVERKILL! My coach is trying to murder me. I'm a lazyass and i admit it! Also, i'll be switching between catcher(My poor knees) 1st base(I have no fucking clue as to why my coach is putting me there in the 6 years i've been playing softball i have only played 1st base ONCE) and 3rd base(...My dad was being mean and since he is our other coach his comment was "You need to be a cat to play 3rd, and you need an arm" I told him i was a ninja, and not a cat. he told me there was nothing ninja about me besides my amazing reflexes, silence, and fighting ability. So apparently, i don't have an arm meanwhile in 6th grade, i was able to throw across the soccer field(My math teacher who was using our softball throws as an example told me it was 111 feet, my dad highly doubted that) Longer story short, i'm apparently playing 3rd, catcher, and 1st. My coach and dad are insane. i'm a catcher, slowish but able to catch high balls! Not a third baseman who gets grounders!**

******My insane math teacher nailed a girl in the head today with a tasty treat(Starburst) when trying to throw it at me. i laughed, grabbed my tasty treat, and watched as she glared at Mr T.**

_**Q-Hm... do you even read my ranting? Or jsut skip over it. Cuz i will stop ranting if you guys want...**_

**A-I could list a million things i hate, but i wont to save you all the trouble.**

**End**


	16. Awkward Tension

**An**

**I wrote this in school too so its short, i really need to stop writing these in school. They always come out short. Anyway, read the bottom authors note, it has improtant news.**

* * *

Awkward Tension

The awkward tension around the base could be cut with Mr. Switch. Ever since Deidara and I accidentally kissed we'd been avoiding each other like crazy by fleeing the room when the other entered. Konan blamed the tension on me, I however blamed Tobi and so, Konan started to blame Tobi. Everyone blamed Tobi since everything was usually his fault.

"This is really bugging me." commented Konan as I saw Deidara enter the room we were sitting in, once he saw me he turned to flee. As he went to flee he was captured by the strong blue arms of Kisame. Deidara responded with a big ole "Fuck you" to him.

"Aren't you two tired of avoiding each other?" asked Sasori.

"Yeah you two were like kunai and shuriken, both weapons needed by ninja!" added Kisame, he got stares from half of the room including me. I think he meant that we were good together, like peanut butter and jelly.

"The hell?" asked Hidan as he stared at the shark.

"We're not, yeah." protested Deidara after he understood the meaning of the strange comparison.

"But you two have to be tired of this, Kisame's example just wasn't the best." argued Konan. I stared at her in response before replying.

"No (un)" said the bomber and I together. We looked at each other, made eye contact, and looked away. Konan grabbed our ponytails and dragged us closer before pulling us to the living room closet. Shit. Deidara soon voiced my thoughts.

"Shit, un." stated Deidara as he also realized her plan. Kisame, who looked amused at the situation, opened the door for Konan. Deidara and I were both pushed in and the door was promptly closed behind us leaving us in darkness. Deidara began to bang on the door yelling profanities out at Konan while I pulled a hairpin from my hair and began trying to pick the lock. Deidara stopped and watched me as I almost made success. Then my hairpin snapped.

"Damn it!" I snapped as I looked at the broken pin, "Who's idea was it to get these genius locks?"

"Kakuzu's, they help reinforce the door, un." answered Deidara as he sat crisscross against the wall to watch me.

"Damn greedy bastard." I muttered tossing my hair pin to the floor.] and blowing on the hair that now came across my face.

"Well I don't like it; they're too advanced for a hairpin." I said crossing my arms and leaning against the wall. I eventually slid down and rested my head on my knees. After that was silence….

And more silence…

And finally….

An awkward silence…

Deidara shifted uncomfortably as I pulled out my switchblade; sadly I had still not gotten Mr. Switch back.

"So, un." said Deidara and I looked up at him in the darkness. His hair was visible because of how yellow it was, it was still blond but it had a yellow tint. His eyes were also visible and his scope was, the rest of his face was barely visible because of the dark. He reminded me of a vampire in the darkness. I wonder what I looked like…

"What?" I asked after a moment. I started to play with my switchblade.

"Why have we been avoiding each other, anyway, un?" asked Deidara. I looked up from the finger that had a thin line of crimson from my blade slipping as I played with it. I stared at him as I put my finger in my mouth to stop the bleeding.

"I've been avoiding you because you made it awkward." I explained as a few unwanted memories popped into my head. I forced them back to the back of my mind where I hid most of my expressions and emotions.

"I was avoiding you because I was afraid you'd stab me, un." admitted Deidara. I would do that, but I wasn't really going to stab him for accidentally kissing me, purposely falling on me however… well let's say he'd be missing the ability to reproduce now had he.

I observed Deidara closely. He was hiding something. I could tell because he looked nervous, I could see it even through the darkness. He was biting his lip and playing with his fingers, his nervous habits.

"And?" I pushed, Deidara sighed and leaned his head back into the wall earning an "Ow, un!" of pain from the force he used, not very ninja of him.

"I was afraid it was… your first." admitted Deidara as he sheepishly rubbed his head.

"It was." I stated. After that another silence came over us. We sat through he pregnant silence.

"Sorry, un." said Deidara after awhile. I blinked at him.

"Don't be, I really don't give a shit it was you." I said, Deidara squinted at me and leaned closer so there was little personal space. I got ready to hit him.

"What's bothering you? I can tell something's bothering you, yeah." said Deidara. I sighed and leaned my head on his shoulder. I was feeling weary, probably from the tension and training that day. I was stressing myself out, Konan would have to take me to the hot springs again.

"I guess it's just… it wasn't on purpose." I said before pausing to think, "I mean, compared to that crap in movies I just feel… I just feel like I was jipped."

Deidara stared at me as I sighed and put my head into my knees. I closed my eyes and heard Deidara ask something but I couldn't make out what. I lifted my head to look him in the eyes.

"Eh?" I asked and he sighed before asking again.

"Want to try again?" I did a double take.

"T-the hell!?" I sputtered, at last showing my confusion. Granted it was in the dark and it probably wasn't showing too well. I stared into his eyes to see if he was completely serious, or possibly just bat shit crazy.

"I mean, a real kiss, like a do over, un." explained Deidara. I stared at him. Did he really just ask that?

…

…

Jashin, he did ask that. Well fuck me.

What the hell was I going to do?

* * *

**AN-**

**Well, heres the important news. As of now, i have a 3rd story up. Its one chapter as of this post and it is a collaboration between Shidonii-kun and i, READ IT! i want a bunch of reviews and views before i update Insomnia again yes i'm bribing you and no, i feel no guilt on doing it. If you actually care about Insomnia, just go to my page and look at it, its called Stoic Love. I don't care if you look at my other story, Insane, that was just something i did while being bored over the summer.**

**My schools insane, just to let you lovely people know. So far my math teacher is probably the mos tinsane person i have ever met in my entire life. Then my Spanish teacher comes next, he always randomly stops lecturing, points at me, says my name urgently, then says 'Hi!' then go right back to where he was lecturing. My school... my teachers... INSANITY! **

**Q-What do you think Itami's going to do? Kiss Deidara willingly, or punch him? Or something else? I love reading guesses.**

**A-Well! I was very surprised, NO ONE told me to STFU on my ranting! I was so surprised! I feel loved. I try to make my rants interesting by taking the most interesting things of my week, however with my insane teachers this year i can go on and on for the length of the entire story with stories! I doubt you want to read that...**

**Anyways, what can i rant about today?... my teacher tried to get us to play a game today(My math teacher Mr T) He started the game by singing "I love math, yes i do, i love math, how about you!" and then he looked around the classroom, pointed at me, said my name, and i had to pick someone to say that to next. I only know the names of 4 people in my class, 1 of them was behind me so i couldn't do them and the other was next to me so i wasn't allowed to do him, so i picked the other guy i knew in front of the guy next to me. We got 3 rounds before the idiot of the class made us lose... hes sucha fucktard. How the fuck did he get into honors?**

** My Spanish teacher pointed at me today and said my name in an urgent manner, instead of saying HI! like usual he said "There;s a spider on your head!" Now i'm fucking terrified of spiders so i fliipped out, smacking my head and watched as a fucking RUBBER spider came off my head onto my desk. I turned around and went to punch the boy behind me, he looked ready to shit his pants. I didn't hti him but i did, accidentally, mark a few answers on his test wrong when he passed it up to me. Suck on that shithead.**

**Well thats all i've got, BYEZ!**


	17. Out of luck

**AN- **

**Shidonii Betaed this for me, she made me change all the said's and asked's after a certain point, ITS HARD THINKING UP SYNONYMS!**

**But enough with my complaining, enjoy the chapter. Oh and in case you forgot, this is part of the plotline, its a big part, so was the last like, 2 chapters. **

* * *

What the hell was I going to do?

"Um…"I responded brilliantly. Deidara stared at me, waiting for a response.

"Err…"I began but stopped. Deidara continued to stare.

"…I um…" I had no clue…

"Well, un?" asked Deidara receiving a sigh from me.

"You're not supposed to ask a question like that." I explained awkwardly, Jashin neither Deidara nor am I a romantic person, so this was probably the most awkward thing either of us had ever done.

"You'd punch me if I didn't un." pointed out Deidara. Jashin, it just got even more awkward if possible. Deidara started to fidget and I sliced my finger playing with my switchblade again.

"So, un?" he asked. I flinched and looked him in the eyes. What should I do? Punch him? Ignore him? Kiss him? Tell him to fuck off? Pretend that it's all a dream and that I'm in a coma from the car accident? Although not likely, it is possible.

"Um…"I trailed again, Jashin help me please!

"Its yes or no, un." said Deidara, awkwardly might I add.

"Um…"Ok, I'm going to list pros and cons here. The pros being we may fix our friendship, I stop feeling moody about it, and we can yell at Konan to let us out. The cons being it could make our friendship worse, I may become even moodier, and Konan might not let us out anyway or she may have forgotten about us.

"Well, un?" asked Deidara. I let out a deep sigh, and chose.

"Fine." Deidara seemed surprised I said that. We rearranged our positions.

"We will never speak of this again, agreed?" I asked. Deidara nodded. Our faces got closer.

Closer…

closer…

and…

"AH HAH!" the door was thrown open, making me and Deidara split apart. Konan was pointing at us and scanning us. I was giving her a look showing that I was not amused. Deidara and I then realized the door was open.

The door was open…

Deidara launched himself into Konan knocking her over. I calmly walked out and glared at the guilty parties, Kisame, Tobi, and Konan. Konan because it was her idea, Kisame for helping, and Tobi because he started this by wanting to play Twister.

"What happened?" inquired Kisame. I continued to glare at him. My glare told him I wanted to injure him. He grinned at me again, he was obviously mocking me and it was as if he were saying "What, you think you can take this?".

No I did not think I could take on Kisame.

"Damn you Kisame, fuck you Konan, and go to hell Tobi." I declared before leaving to go and try to suffocate myself in my pillow. I sat on my bed trying to commit suicide for about 10 minutes before someone sat next to me.

"Hey, un." said Deidara. I lifted my head, gave him an unamused look, and proceeded to drop my head into my pillow.

"So, un." he started and I looked at him from the corner of my eye.

"We didn't finish what we started, un." said Deidara. I rolled off my bed and stood up.

"No way! We're out of the closet now." I pointed out and Deidara rolled his eyes.

"But you did say you wouldn't mind." he also pointed out.

"Yeah, in the _closet_." I argued. Deidara gave me a look which I returned. We had a good long staring contest before I gave him the finger and walked out.

"What happens in the closet, stay's in the closet." I added before deciding to go outside; Sasori taught me how to open the boulder entrance. It was difficult but I could get it up enough for me to duck and get out. I didn't have enough chakra to do anything else. I leaned against a tree when I got there and tried to think about what had happened lately.

Ok, so first things first, let's go over the major problem. I'm in Naruto; obviously I've been doing it for about 2 months. Now what I've learned is that my chakra, the little I have, is in my blood, my blood multiplies faster than most and I bleed a lot, when going form world to world my clothes slowly change, and finally when wounded in one world it instantly goes to the other body in the other world. Now let's go more about my blood chakra. With this my hopes are I can find some kind of defense or Jutsu; maybe learn to make a wall of blood or something. However, according to Sasori and Itachi my body isn't made for this so it would be incredibly tiring and hard so it wouldn't be worth it.

"Motherfucker, why do I have to be stuck with all this?" I wondered aloud leaning back.

"Itami!" called Konan as she walked out and sat across from me. I raised an eyebrow wondering what she wanted.

"Deidara's looking for you." she said with a smirk. I made a face. Problem two time.

Problem two is Deidara. We kissed. Accidentally but it was still a kiss, my first kiss. I feel jipped too. He offered a redo in the closet and I said yes, then Konan interrupted and now what?

"So what happened?" asked Konan. I sighed; I might as well get it off my chest.

"Deidara offered a redo for the kiss since I felt jipped and you interrupted and now he's following me around." I said with a groan. Konan squealed.

"Konan, un!" called Deidara walking out, his eyes landed on me. I banged my head into the tree.

"You planned that." I decided.

"Nope, I'm just incredibly lucky." she laughed as her body began to dissolve into a bunch of pieces of paper. They then folded into butterflies and flew away.

"Damn, I want to learn to do that, I'd be four times as fast as I am now." I muttered as Deidara reached me.

"Itami, un!" he called plopping down next to me.

"What?" I demanded. He sighed and leaned against the tree to watch the sunset in the background with me.

"What do you want, un?" he wondered aloud, although he did pose it as a question to me afterwards. I looked at him and he elaborated.

"I mean, you said you felt jipped so I offered to have a real kiss as you would put it, now you don't want to, what do you actually want, yeah?" he added. I sighed.

"I don't really know what I want." I admitted.

"Well the offer always stands, I don't mind, un. I care for you, you're my best friend." he decided standing.

"I'm going in, you shouldn't stay out much longer." he decided and as soon as he was out of sight, I felt one of my senses acting up. I could feel something bad was going to happen.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here." wondered a creepy ass voice. My senses were never wrong. I did the most brilliant thing ever.

"DEIDARA!" I screeched at the top of my lungs as I pulled out my switchblade and turned to face the offender. Pale skin, slit snake eyes, and black hair. Who was it? The creepy ass fucker known as….

Orochimaru

I was soooooo fucked!

"I heard that you know the future. And that you have strange chakra." he smiled stepping closer with Kabuto and Sasuke at his sides. I couldn't do shit with my switchblade against these guys.

"DEIDARA! KONAN! FUCKERS!" I screamed again and immediately Sasuke was behind me and had an arm covering my mouth. Worst thing that can happen now, I get knocked out. What do the fuckers do?

Knock me out.

I am in sooooooooooooo much trouble.

How the hell do I get myself into these situations?

**3RD PERSON POV(SHOCK!)**

Deidara entered the base and went to find Sasori; he would know what to do. Turns out said puppeteer had a feeling that something bad was happening, he was going to check outside. He met with Deidara right at the exit.

"Danna!" called Deidara and Sasori stopped.

"What?" snapped Sasori, he was actually slightly worried. He knew Itami was outside and he did not need her to get in trouble. Plus he saw her like… like family. She was part of their messed up family now and he was worried about her.

"I have a question to ask you, yeah." stated Deidara.

"Fine, brat." Sasori sighed and Deidara opened his mouth but was abruptly cut off.

"Deidara!" They could faintly hear Itami calling for Deidara, with… panic? Panic etched into her voice. They shared an alarmed look, Itami never screamed, much less in panic. She never panicked, never. Sasori went to open the boulder but found it stuck.

"Who was the last one to open it before you?" inquired Sasori as he and Deidara tried to open it. Deidara thought about it.

"Itami, Konan used her paper to fly out, yeah." answered Deidara. Sasori grunted in frustration.

"Because her chakra is in her blood it acts like glue for the boulder because of the residue left behind from the blood. In other words, it's stuck. We'll need Kisame to break it open, or Kakuzu." explained Sasori.

"KISAME, KAKUZU, YEAH!" yelled Deidara. Kisame ran down the hallway moments later followed by a concerned Konan, entertained Hidan, and blank Kakuzu.

"Break open the boulder." ordered Sasori.

"Why? wondered Kakuzu looking at the boulder. Their answer came in the form of another panic laced scream from Itami.

"DEIDARA! KONAN! FUCKERS!" her voice was louder this time, more panicked. Kakuzu and Kisame's eyes widened, Kakuzu's arm hardened and he smashed through the boulder. The boulder crumbled and they all ran out to see something they did not like in the slightest. Itami's unconscious form was over the shoulder of Uchiha Sasuke and Orochimaru was giving them an evil grin.

"Itami, un!" yelled Deidara.

"You won't be seeing her anytime soon." declared Kabuto as from the bottom of them they seemed to turn into flames. The Akatsuki ran full speed at them but they couldn't reach them even at full speed, they had burned away. But they didn't care that Orochimaru, Sasuke and Kabuto were gone. They were upset that Itami, their new family member had been taken along with Orochimaru.

"Damn it, un!" Deidara's statement was followed by a chorus of fucks, shits, damn its, and craps.

* * *

**AN**

**_Shidonii_-for all you people, who read this, I'm the beta, and I need you to help me. I have banned Shadow from using the words said and ask, because she abuses them. If you find them, tell her, I and I will make her fix them!**

**-_-…. I don't abuse them!... and authors notes don't count because i'm lazy.**

**On a further note, i had only 2 softball games and no practice this weekend because of rain, yay! I love playing softball in the rain, sadly one of our rainy games was canceled. After one game we had a small amount of batting practice, i was trying to avoide the run down with me from 3rd to home and my coach was the catcher, i tripped and he proceeded to continuously bang the ball into my helmet declaring i was out 17 times. I laughed the entire time and Lexi, who had come for the game, laughed at me.**

** The other day in my HONORS math class my teacher put a simple problem on the board(It looked complicated but you do it in steps and its fucking easy) and a kid who looked half asleep was asked what to do nxt. He stared at it and yelled "It's too hard!" My teacher then sighed and said "Its 24 divided by 3." The boy stared at Mr T and said "That's also too hard!" everyone laughed and my teacher then decided "I don't want to injure myself" as he went over to where he keeps the tasty treats and pulled out a blue baseball helmet. He put it on and proceeded to bang his head into the chalk board for like, 5 minutes. 5 mintues later during our quiz another teacher walked in, stared at Mr T who stil had his helmet on as he watched us and the teacher pointed to Mr T and asked "How can you guys take him seriously in that?" Everyone laughed again. I have decided that i have 3 insane teachers, my SPanish, my math, and my music, how the hell did i end up with insane people?**

_**Q-Ok, so, more guesses since they make me smile, what do you thinks going down with Orochimaru and Itami? How will the Akatsuki react?**_

**Goodbye my lovely readers**


	18. Torture and Experimentation

**Author's Note-**

**Enjoy the chapter, I'm not in a good mood, I'm sick, and its only October! Gahh**

* * *

When I woke up in my world the first thing that went through my mind was FUCK! My second response was to verbally declare this thought. Moments later two curious bystanders known as my brothers came up to my room.

"Itami, what's the matter?" wondered Chris looking for an offending object and or person. Time to lie.

"I had a dream where Orochimaru raped me." I lied. Jack made a face seeing as he knew who Orochimaru was, Chris only knew he was from Naruto.

"You need mind soap." decided Jack and I snorted.

"So do you, pervert, shall I remind the world of all your perverted moments?" I argued, Jack made a pout but I was almost immune to it seeing as how I did it too. I had learned the secret art of the Duncan puppy pout.

"If that's all I'm going downstairs, I have a date to get ready for." called Chris as he started down the ladder. Chris and date do not belong in the same sentence unless has no is between them. Almost as if reading my mind Jack followed him reciting things similar to my thoughts.

I sighed and leaned my head back against my wall and glared at the punching bag that had a picture of Orochimaru and Danzo on it. Them were a bit crumpled form me punching them so many times.

"Well, I'm screwed." I decided as I felt a prick on my arm. I glared at the red dot of blood forming; something tells me that Orochimaru was going to turn me into a lab rat. Wonderful.

**3RD PERSON POV**

Deidara and the rest of the Akatsuki stared at the spot Itami had been in not only five minutes before. Hidan had punched a tree; Konan had clenched her fists and bit her lip trying not to start to swear like Hidan while Deidara swore while making violent gestures and threats. Kisame had kind of just stared for a while and Kakuzu, being a calm miser, observed the scene before him. He scanned for Itami's sign of struggle and found her switchblade lodged in a tree with a slight amount of chakra stuck on it.

They had come from that way.

Kakuzu nodded and found himself pleased with that clue. He looked around for more evidence. There were signs of bleeding with a speck of blood on the blade showing Itami's fast and precise aim had gotten someone. But that was not the only thing that had Kakuzu now wearing a smirk under his mask.

"Deidara," said blond looked to Kakuzu and Kakuzu pointed to a strange device on the floor, "Is that one of Itami's things, from her world?"

Deidara flew to the device and picked it up hoping it was her IPod, it was the only thing he knew how to use of hers! He looked it over and found the familiar screen of the time and a picture of Itami, a girl with short light brown hair and blue eyes, and a boy with dark hair.

"So? What is it?" asked Konan curiously, and hopefully. Konan was praying that it would help find Itami.

"It's Itami's IPod, un." stated Deidara, Konan and Hidan leaned closer to hear the blond.

"It can call Itami's other device." realized Deidara. Konan smiled.

"Does that mean we can get in contact with her?" she asked hopefully.

"We can, un. And Itami also taught me how to track her other device." Konan cheered and they all let out a deep breath in relief. They could get Itami back; they could get their crazy, stoic, badass, and sarcastic bitch back and make their family of insane idiots whole again.

**ITAMI'S POV**

When I woke up again in Orochimaru's dungeon cell area with a chain around my ankle I found myself to only be in my underwear, so bra and panties. I was not happy as my first thought was somewhere along the lines of 'FUCK what if he raped me!' Then my mind, which seemed to have gone south for the winter early, came back and reasoned that he only targeted little boys. That made me feel at ease, slightly.

Of course then my thoughts wandered to what happened to the clothes I was wearing when I went to sleep, I had just woken up, right? Turns out not, I had been in a half sleep mode that someone used to change me and put me in here. That was that weird injection while I was in my world, wonderful.

I looked around and analyzed my surroundings, I was in a cell that looked to be iron and it had no little windows, holes, or anything. So I was basically unable to escape no matter what. My hair was out, showing they took my bobby pins so no unlocking things for me. Next before I could even thing about the room was my chained ankle, it was a newer looking chain, not rusted or anything so I wouldn't be able to somehow break it apart easily.

"Well fuck." I would have gone on longer; however, a vibrating on my chest caught my attention quickly. I pulled my phone, my shitty phone that usually had little battery, from my bra. I blinked at it. Who could be calling me? No one from my world could call me while in the Narutoverse.

…

…

Then I realized it.

"Deidara?" I wondered as I hit the talk button.

"Deidara?" I questioned once more into the phone.

"Itami! Thank all the gods, hell even Jashin and Leader-sama, that you're not dead, un!" said Deidara. I gave my phone a blank face.

"Oh so you thought that he could kill me?" I snapped in a bitch please manner. But then, I got serious.

"Ok, now Deidara we only have limited time since I have no idea how long since I was thrown in here or how long until someone comes, I also only have about two hours worth of battery on my phone so you have two hours to locate where I am. Also, do you remember how to track my phone from my IPod?" I heard an affirmation from Deidara and the others in the background.

"Alright, I'm going to get off now and hide my phone back in my bra," I paused as Deidara asked why I would keep it there of all places, should I tell him? "Orochimaru stripped me down and that's all I have, underwear, so hurry the hell up asshole!"

I could hear the snorts from the others and the sound of the IPod dropping in shock. I ended the call and placed my phone back where I had found it and leaned against the wall while glaring at the door. Now, I wait.

My wait wasn't very long, I waited for about 20 minutes before Kabuto came in, smirked at me, and led me to a lab room. I could tell, there were vials, needles, and shit like that all over. Not to mention the table had iron straps to keep me from fleeing or attacking. I chose that moment to fight back.

"Ha!" I yelled head butting Kabuto before doing a vertical kick up knocking him over and the keys that he used for my door, and my chain onto the floor. I proceeded to try and kick him in the face but he grabbed my foot and knocked me over. Two guards came in and strapped me to the table, but I was ok with that. My plan, was already in action.

Normally I wouldn't admit to pain very easily or complain about it, but this torture, this experimentation, left me feeling like someone had ground my legs up, put way past boiling lava in my veins, and Orochimaru made sure I felt everything. Every little incision, every injection, he made sure I couldn't fall asleep or anything!

"Hm, you're done for now but you'll be back later." decided Orochimaru as Kabuto carried me to my cell and chained me up. He left and I waited until he was gone to pull an object from my bra. A small, iron, key ring that had about 6 keys on it. Yes, when I punched Kabuto my intention wasn't to go ninja against me, it was to grab the tools needed for escape while he was occupied by a bloody nose or black eye. However, I had a new problem. I tried shifting my legs but had to bite my lip because from the hips down I couldn't feel anything except for the pain from moving them and the boiling blood running through my veins.

"Damn it." I spat as I put away my keys and held my head up. Orochimaru had gotten frustrated and decided to cut my face up a bit so I had blood running into my left eye from a cut on my forehead and a cut going from under my left eye running to the corner of my mouth, he left the right side of my face alone.

I sighed and looked at my badly beaten body, I wouldn't be able to move for days after this unless Konan decided to use her magic on me, that's even if they can find me. I have no idea how long it's been since the battery on my phone died since it happened during my torture session. I just hoped someone, like Zetsu, had found out my location. Or else I was screwed. My attention left my thoughts and found its way to the new figure in the door. Sasuke Uchiha.

He stalked over to me and looked down at me. I grinned at him showing some blood coming from my mouth.

"What are Itachi's weaknesses?" I snorted in response to his question, why would I tell him anything?

"Who?" Yes, I was purposely irritating him. I could take the pain, besides if I were injured enough Orochimaru may not torture me anymore. Sasuke glared at me and punched my face and knocked my head back into the wall. My left eye was completely closed now and probably already swelling on the cheek underneath it.

"Itachi, what are his weakness?" he forced out in an angry manner.

"I don't know, I lost my memory last time you hit me." I laughed, I received another punch.

"You hit like a child." A long cut along the side of my face was the reward for this one.

"I'm assuming you know seeing as how you know my name, and Orochimaru tells me you know the future." I laughed at Sasuke.

"Want to know what happens when you assume?" Sasuke's glare widened as if he knew I was going to joke around more, "You make an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'me'."

Sasuke looked unimpressed. Although I did get a murderous expression on him a few more retorts later.

"Tell me before I kill you!" hissed Sasuke after we found out that his Genjutsu had no affect on me.

"Go ahead." Sasuke stormed out after that one, I smirked after him. A battle of the eyes can't work on me, and you can't win a battle of words with a genius like me. I would just make you look like a moron.

I sighed as I stared at the ceiling, I could get through this. I was Itami Duncan, I could get through this! I bit my lip as I thought of Orochimaru; I was probably going to be tortured again, wasn't I?

Yeah…

Suddenly I felt a burst of confidence. I grinned to myself like I was mental.

Fuck Orochimaru and fuck his little boy too, I could get through this. I could.

**3RD** **PERSON POV**

Zetsu glared at the electronic device in his hands. It had lost its signal just after he got it and only got a general area of where he had to go, general being about half a kilometer of a diameter for his search area.

"_This sucks, _**why did she have to go and get captured**?" complained Zetsu as he trouped through the bushes. Apparently, technology didn't work in the ground and he knew that Itami would throw a bitch fit if they got her back and she found her IPod was broken.

If?

"_We are getting Itami back no if's."_ declared white Zetsu, black Zetsu sighed, if only his white half couldn't read his thoughts.

"_Can_ _you feel that chakra too_?" inquired white Zetsu as he felt the slight sliver of angry chakra a distance away, it was gone as quick as it came but black Zetsu had also felt it.

"_Maybe its Itami_." suggested white Zetsu, "**Moron, Itami has no chakra**_**.**_"

"_Yes, but Itami has that ability to piss others off with her sarcasm, whit, and insults_." insisted white Zetsu. Black Zetsu mentally face-palmed getting a chuckle from his white half.

Yup, that chakra flare was most likely Itami.

Now to locate it.

**3RD** **PERSON POV, with Deidara**

Deidara was worried. No, worried was an understatement. Deidara, although how much he hated to grit his teeth and bite his nails he was doing both waiting for Zetsu to report back.

"Deidara, she'll be back soon. They might just get tired of her insults." commented Konan, trying her best to lighten the tense mood in the living room. It was only her and Deidara in there too, all the others members, even Itachi, fled from Deidara.

"C'mon Deidara, talk." commanded Konan gently after receiving no response. She still had no response. She frowned at him

"Talk." she stated. Deidara frowned at her but nothing else. Konan bite her lip, she would have an outburst should he not respond. She was worried for the blonde; she was worried he was blaming himself for Itami being kidnapped. And Konan was right, he was blaming himself.

'It's my fault Itami was kidnapped, I was the one who made her leave the base and I was the one who was last out there and didn't feel their chakra, or I didn't make her come in for protection. I should have stayed out there, with Itami, she isn't a ninja and now because of that she's gone. And it's my entire fault. All my fault Itami, someone I would call a good friend to me, is gone. All my fault' Deidara scowled at himself and Konan frowned more.

"Deidara, it's not your fault!" she hissed, now upset he was blaming himself for something none of them could have seen coming.

'All my fault…'

Konan frowned at Deidara even more if possible. he was in his own little world.

'My entire fault, all my fault.'

"Deidara…"tried Konan waving her hand in front of his face. No response.

'Itami's gone, it's all my fault.' Konan had enough.

"DEIDARA STOP FUCKING IGNORING ME!" That shocked Deidara out of his trance; it also woke up the snoring Hidan, went through Kakuzu's ear plugs, knocked Itachi from his meditation, and made Kisame drop Samehada. Sasori looked up from his poison table and chuckled.

"Looks like Konan's had enough of his moping." he commented before going back to his work. Yup, Deidara definitely couldn't mope now that he had Konan nagging him. Although that same thought was going through his mind even through her ranting.

'It's all, my fault. Me. I'm the one who got Itami kidnapped.'

**ITAMI'S POV**

I had been tortured again and now, I could barely keep myself up. And I was mainly leaning on the wall so I didn't particularly have to keep myself up.

"How do you feel?" sneered Kabuto. I glared at him to the best of my ability with a bloody and swollen eye.

"Go to hell." I snapped before coughing, whatever Orochimaru put in me definitely took out my excellent immune system.

"You'll see Lord Orochimaru again in two hours." he called leaving me alone to the torch lit room I was in. Then, my eyes widened to the best of my ability.

Torch plus light equals fire! If I can get up, my main problem at the time, I can use the fire to fight back! Or I can make it seem like committed suicide meanwhile I limp through the halls while they panic! Ok, not my best plan but still, its better than nothing. Besides, I would need a distraction or else all attention will be on the missing prisoner who is injured greatly.

I tried standing but found it useless. I spent 10 minutes and it felt like I was an extremely obese person and I had tried to run a treadmill with the incline and speed up all the way for an hour. My limbs gave out completely after my 13th attempt and I had to lay on the floor until Sasuke came in to question me but instead had to pick me up and put me on the cot, which felt like metal. Sasuke tried questioning me but got only swearing and insults from me. He left after punching me in the stomach like a brat. Which he is.

Deidara. I looked at the ceiling. I had Deidara on my mind. I wonder if he was looking for me, was he worried? Or did he not care? Was he blaming himself for my kidnapping? I hope not, it's my fault for being outside when I can't defend myself against most of the population in this world. I wonder if Konan was having a breakdown of being the only girl in the base, probably not. She seemed to be pretty calm about things like this. Like Kakuzu calm, I bet he was the one who found my phone. He was the only one who would have been calm enough at that point, other than Itachi but Itachi had been out at that time.

"Deidara." I whispered hoarsely, almost flinching at how bad my voice had gotten. Was that really me? It couldn't be, I sounded like an old person who hadn't had something to drink in days.

I was kind of wishing that we had gone through with the kiss in the closet, then this wouldn't have happened. I wouldn't be here and I would probably be trying to kill Tobi, Deidara, or Hidan right now.

Deidara…I missed him. He was like a best friend for me, we were both weirdoes and we got along great. He had his physical oddities, his hand mouths, and I found them awesome. Then I had my strange looks, my piercings, bi-colored eyes, and actual crayon crimson tipped hair. He admitted he liked my oddities.

I sighed. I was really wishing I had kissed Deidara now. I was really starting to miss him too. Sure we had our fights, but I missed him. I missed arguing with him, and wrestling with him, and talking with him. I missed trying to teach him how to use my IPod and us arguing over art with Sasori. I missed all the Akatsuki but me and Deidara; we were just like… like peanut butter and jelly or something. (**XD**) I missed him. I missed him like I would miss Jack and Chris if they were ever gone.

Deidara…

I miss you.

Please, please come save me. Save me from this torture.

Save me from this hell.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

**Did anyone notice that I've been jumping from POV to POV like crazy? It's because too much is happening to both the Akatsuki and Itami and they're separated.**

**I'm feeling sick, I hate being sick. Usually when I feel sick I get a stuffy nose, that leads to me being irritated, which leads to me getting a headache, which leads to me being tired, which leads to me being a bitch, which leads to people making me mad, which leads to me getting a stomach ache, which leads to me glaring at everything that breaths, which leads to everyone avoiding me and making me tired. And I have school tomorrow where I shall bitch at those who made me sick, the asshole who sits next to me in Math and Science (He called me Miss Sassy Pants today… he told me he disliked me because I was getting better grades and laughing at him, I responded to him saying this by saying "Good" thus I was called Miss Sassy Pants)**

**Ok so I have an elderly IPod touch, version 1.2.3 or something like that. My friend (LEXI!) laughed at me when I finally got the App Store to work but couldn't get anything because the apps all needed updates which I cannot get on my IPod. Lexi made a dinosaur case for it and I think she put it on Instagram or… whatever else she has. She's put up a shitload of pictures of the Hunger games too. if you find her account on whatever the thing is, like my dinosaur IPod. Its so old it should be a fossil. Off topic, I finally got songs for it! 12 songs, I'm proud. Now I need to save up for more ITunes gift cards, I want to buy the Naruto Shippuden Movies for the overnight field trip(That's like a 4 hour ride) I have coming up in a few weeks. I also want to buy more songs and Naruto seasons, I need to make money. Sadly, I cannot get a job. Nor would I be able to get there should I get one. Nor do I have enough time. Speaking of time, I neglected my SS homework for this, my teachers going to yell at me. Feel grateful. I am also neglecting a load of things that will haunt me for neglecting them.**

**Q-…I'm too sick to think… tell me, what are you going to be for Halloween in a month? if you're not dressing up, what would you dress up as? What about your pets? **

**A-Oh it was more guesses, I love guesses. They make me laugh and smile and put me in a better mood than I usually am in. I'm in a shitty one today.**

**Goodbye lovelies, and hope my cold goes away soon or else my school may get burned to the ground in my wrath, I am going to go have some soup, or I am hoping ramen but it's probably soup, I shall pretend its ramen, and hope the stomach ache I feel coming on goes away before it comes. **


	19. I'm Not Crazy

**AN-**

**I had off yesterday so I spent some of my time writing this.**

**Enjoy it.**

* * *

It had been about a day since I had been taken in by Orochimaru. I had locked myself in my room in my world so that no one would see me look like I had been run over a few times by a bus.

I was anxiously awaiting my rescue now. I really wanted to be rescued soon, I couldn't move at all now. Even if I tried with all my strength, it did me no good. I was lucky I was able to blink.

"About sixty days." decided Orochimaru and I glared over at him. He chuckled and pat my forehead to which I muttered a few insults.

"The injections I gave you have solidified your chakra, you may be able to use it freely now. Maybe even control your blood!" laughed Orochimaru, I spat at him only for him to sidestep and go to leave. Although I was slightly interested in that.

"However, your time remaining is short." he spoke with a creepy cackle following. What did he mean by that?

"Sixty days." repeated Orochimaru as he left, locking the door behind him. Why did I get the feeling that sixty days was important? What did it mean? Sixty days until what? However my thoughts were cut short as my vision began to dim, I wasn't passing out. I was just losing my vision. It was probably because of Orochimaru's drugs.

I relaxed and allowed myself to rest a bit. I just had to wait for the Akatsuki, they would come after me. I knew they would.

I knew Deidara would.

Deidara was probably coming right now, no scratch the probably. He was coming now. I knew he was. I could feel it. My thoughts were cut off as the door opened.

"You're answering my questions this time." Ah and here's the Uchiha, let us play again. As Sasuke began to beat me, I could feel myself being stared at. I turned my attention to the two glowing orbs on the wall staring at us.

Zetsu

I grinned at them and they widened before leaving. They were here. Now all I had to do was endure.

**3RD** **PERSON**

Deidara couldn't figure out what was taking Zetsu so long. He had gone into the hideout to locate Itami ten minutes before, he was taking forever!

The entire Akatsuki was restless as they waited, even Itachi who couldn't care less about what happened to Itami. All attention was focused on the soft ground that was now being dug up as Zetsu appeared. White Zetsu grinned at them.

"_Itami's a bit held up right now_, **the Uchiha brat is beating the shit out of her."** reported Zetsu, this infuriated most of the Akatsuki. How dare the little shit beat Itami?

"Let's go, (un)!" shouted Konan, Deidara, and Hidan. Kisame was just as eager and Kakuzu already had one of his fists hardened to blast down the door.

"**She's in the prisoner section**, _about half a kilometer into the base,_ **in the West wing, **_on the 2nd_ _deepest floor."_ reported Zetsu, everyone nodded and with that, Kakuzu blasted open the door. Alarms sounded and they marched in, ready to retrieve Itami.

Itami's POV

I grinned to myself as Sasuke left to stall the attackers. Little did he know he would come face to face with a pissed off Akatsuki. Little turd would get what he deserved.

An explosion racked the base and a few rocks came from the ceiling. I glared at it, stupid Orochimaru. I would be crushed if Deidara made anything bigger than a clay spider explode! He needs better designs for his bases.

It took time for them to get to me apparently. During that time I tried to break from my chains but my body was too weak to move.

"Damn it!" I muttered as I tried once again only to fail. I sighed and leaned back and glared at the ceiling. I think my glare managed to affect the ceiling or something because one moment it's perfectly fine, the next? It's falling down on me.

Shit.

**3RD PERSON**

The first person to find her was Itachi. Itachi sighed as he observed the girl. She was half crushed by rocks and she was in a half awake half sleep state. Her visible pupil was dilated and would follow him. He knew Itami was aware of everything he did. Although he could see a haze around her eye showing she could probably only identify him as a person, possibly an Akatsuki member because of the cloak.

"It's Itachi." stated Itachi walking over to her calmly. He began attempt to undo to the chains but found them to be chakra sensitive. Itami blinked and moved her hand, one that had not been crushed, slowly to her bra where she pulled out a ring of keys.

"Heh, helpful right?" she asked hoarsely with blood coming from the corner of her mouth. She was in bad shape. Itachi quickly unlocked her and that's when Deidara and Hidan appeared. Deidara ran over as Itachi stepped out of the way. Hidan helped pull the rubble off her and Deidara flinched from looking over Itami. Not only were her scars visible but her body was multicolored from bruises and cuts. Deidara moved her hair and found her left eye to be swollen shut. He gently lifted her as they heard Sasori yell for them.

"It's coming down! Hurry!" They used the body flicker technique to quickly escape the collapsing hideout. They made it out in time to watch the ground collapse and show the remnants of what had been Orochimaru's lab.

"Poor Itami..." mumbled Konan observing the injured girl in Deidara's arms. They quickly made it back to the base by running full speed. Itami was immediately brought to the medical wing where Konan, Kakuzu, and Sasori worked on her. Deidara and Hidan waited outside. They were worried for their comrade. Itami was like a sister to Hidan, albeit one he found to have a very nice body. He enjoyed her reactions whenever he commented on her chest; it usually involved him being impaled with something and a loud barrage of insults and swearing.

"She's going to live." Everyone was relived at Konan's announcement as she came out into the hallway to find the rest of the Akatsuki had accumulated, minus Pein, waiting to hear on Itami's condition. As Kakuzu and Sasori left the room, Deidara slipped inside ignoring Konan's warning of 'go in and be castrated'.

"Hey, un." greeted Deidara giving Itami a small smile as he slid into a chair next to her. She gave him a small grin.

"Hey Dei-chan." she mumbled receiving a glare from Deidara.

"Bitch, yeah." muttered Deidara. Itami chuckled.

"Asshole." responded Itami. They sat in a silence for awhile. Every so often Itami would swear from the pain. Eventually Deidara wanted the silence to end.

"Tell me about your world, your family, yeah." Itami looked to him, surprised.

"Well, my brothers are both nineteen and they're fraternal twins. Chris and Jack, they're both taller than me. We've got a tall gene from our dad, my mom's short though, like 4ft short. She's got an Asian facial structure, narrow eyes and stuff, as you can see I didn't inherit that look. I've got narrow eyes, but not the Asian narrow ones. And I have a narrow face like Chris. Anyway, my brothers are both really funny." chuckled Itami, then she stopped and sighed.

"You'd get along with them well, both idiots, both nineteen; I bet you three could make a little gang and rule my world." Deidara frowned at being called an idiot.

"You can't be nice, even when you're injured, un." Itami snorted in response but continued on about her brothers.

"Chris is a really reckless driver; he has a beat up old car that looks like it was smashed a few times too many with a large mallet. He usually drives far over the speed limit and I'm really, really, terrified, of…." Itami trailed off. Deidara wiped a tear that managed to fall down from her eye.

"I'm really afraid, terrified and mortified, that one day I might open the door and find a police officer there and he'll look really awkward with me answering the door. He'll tell me he's sorry for my loss and that my brothers were killed in a horrible accident and I'll fall to the ground crying with no one to hold me or tell me it's ok." admitted Itami and Deidara was actually shocked. Itami was usually as hard as steel, never showing weakness, but now. She was opening up, actually admitting one of her fears. Deidara had no idea what she was talking about with a car but he did understand she was afraid that whatever her brothers did that was dangerous with it was that one day she may find out they're dead because of it.

"But," mumbled Itami gaining Deidara's full attention, "They've been perfectly fine for the 3 years since they've learned to drive so I can't say they don't have luck on their side."

"What about your friends, yeah?" asked Deidara. Itami chuckled again.

"Sky. Sky's my best friend, even though we're polar opposites. She's spunky and cheerful and she's short and friendly. She has a boyfriend named Josh and they're perfect for each other. Then I have a friend named Violet, she's a year older than me. The bitch, Jack's got a crush on her. She's also obsessed with you guys. Although she would get along very well with Hidan. Then my friend Kirai, she's also older than me, and she's taking manners courses with me. She and Itachi would get along, both are pretty serious, although Kirai is a bit more social and fun and she's got shitty eye sight." Deidara laughed at Itami's friends.

"I also have a friend named Kayan, she's insane. I think legally, she's obsessed with fairies and I have no idea how we're friends. I guess I just attract those random people. I also have a friend named Evelyn, she's pretty cool too; although she's home schooled like Kayan because she's got so many things wrong with her she's not expected to live much longer. That's my rag tag group of idiots back home, don't know what I'd do without my idiots, both worlds now." Itami laughed and Deidara sighed. How could Itami be so… Itami-like even after being tortured?

She was still pretty banged up. Her eye was fine now, although still a bit puffy and hard to see out of. And all the cuts and bruises that were healed had scarred leaving 3 on Itami's face; she decided to wear her hair covering that side of her face now. Yeah, cover her green eye. She also had a pretty fucked up body system now, she still looked pretty fucked up and she couldn't move because of her chakra being upset. Although she was interested in what Orochimaru had said about her now being able to use chakra, Itami would rather her be able to move than use chakra.

"You're insane." muttered Deidara looking over Itami. She grinned at him and beckoned him closer. Curious he leaned closer.

"I've also decided." announced Itami. Deidara was confused, what was she talking about?

"I've decided that I'll take a do over." and with that, Itami leaned up and connected their lips.

Itami's POV

I swear, I could feel sparks going through my body! It was like those cheesy books and stuff, only for me, real! Then when the sparks subsided I could feel the warmth of Deidara's lips. I could feel that both of us were frozen, Deidara in shock, me because I couldn't move much more without pain shooting up my body.

"Itami, hm." Deidara and I separated and he looked at me serious.

"I think your sanity is gone, yeah." With his statement, I laughed.

"Asshole, don't call me crazy just yet. It was just a little bit of torture after all!"

I'm not crazy….yet

I'm getting there though.

* * *

**AN- I wrote this authors note yesterday, I don't feel like updating it for the update so deal with it.**

**I'm right now under a few blankets with my laptop resting on top of them. It's freezing here! I was melting Saturday for softball and now I feel like I'm going to die from the cold. And i don't usually get cold easily. Damn bipolar weather.**

**Hm, nothing really interesting has happened lately. I did go looking for my costume at some Halloween store, they didn't have it. My dad bought me some colorful hair extensions though, makes me happy i can now look badass with a black and purple piece of hair.**

**I also asked my parents if i could get either a labret, my nose pierced, or my tongue and my dad's reaction was why not, my mum's reaction was to be a normalist and say "No, they're too weird!" I proceeded to complain and settle for asking if i could get another hole in my ear. I have decided i want new parents; my mum's a normalist and my dad's like Kakuzu and money. Only he loves to throw stuff out and clean.**

**Q-If you could get any piercing, what would it be? And does it hurt to get that piercing? **

**Shidonii-Ha, I'm the beta so I can just butt in here. I would get snake bites like Pein's, pretty bad ass. You can expect these from no one, okay Shadow? You too little reviewers!**

…**.if I hadn't of looked over this chapter I wouldn't have even noticed Shidonii put that in…**

**A-I want to be Konan!(The question was what you're being for Halloween right?) Only no stores have the costume and all the stuff I've found online costs a fortune my dad doesn't want to spend. I want to be Konan for a few reasons, 1 is she's badass, 2 is i want to be a Naruto character because I'm obsessed, and 3 is because it gives me an excuse to make a load of paper shuriken and go around throwing them at people while yelling "Paper no Jutsu!" Of course my block is full of little kids so i would have like no one to do it to, my blocks boring. As are the ones surrounding it. **

**Goodbye my lovelies**

**PS! I noticed that Insomnia has 95 reviews, that makes me want to cry in joy. I never thought my first, unplanned, story would get even half this amount. I might actually cry if we get to 100.**


	20. Silence of the Three

**An- **

**Enjoy my lovelies**

* * *

It was a peaceful day in the world of Naruto. The birds were singing, the ninjas being ninja, and all that good stuff.

"Hidan you motherfucker get back here damn it!" There went the peace. It had been shattered by yours truly, me.

"Can't catch me, bitch!" snickered Hidan as he hopped backwards down the hallway. I followed him while trying not to face plant into the floor with my crutches. The excuse in my world was I fell down the stairs, and it was true. Jack and Chris witnessed me fall down like an idiot after I tried to walk before I was ready. The hospital gave me a cast and crutches. Now in the Narutoverse I still had the cast and Konan made me a pair of crutches. Other than the broken bone, I looked pretty good. My body was no longer multicolored and I had new scars, of course I had to wear my hair completely covering the left side of my face because of the new scars there. Ah well, shit happens.

"I'm going to castrate you fucker!" I snapped as I chased Hidan. He had decided to test the theory of how I would react to being second based. He proceeded to grab my boob and laugh at me as I turned an angry fire red and began swearing at him violently and loudly. Then I swung at him with a crutch and he took off running with me behind him. Sadly, crutches make me slow, like grandma speed.

"What's going on, un?" yelled Deidara as he stuck his head out only to watch and laugh as Hidan flew backwards into the stone wall of the Akatsuki base. I snorted at the idiot and hobbled over.

"Asshole." I snapped as I whacked him a few times before being satisfied with the damage done. I hobbled back to my comfy spot of the living room couch. Deidara followed me laughing loudly, Hidan also followed and his swearing was just as loud.

"That's it!" All three of us stopped and found Konan with an angry look glaring us down. She made us sit down and she stood in front of us reminding me of a dictator with her pose.

"I'm going to make a bet with you three and you're not allowed to refuse." barked Konan much like a military general. We all nodded, slightly scared of the paper user.

"Alright, here it is. You tree are not allowed to swear," Hidan and I gaped at her, "swear to Jashin," once again, Hidan and I, "or use any verbal ticks like Deidara's un's, yeah's, and hm's," Deidara joined our gawking club, "got it?"

"You're kidding!" I shouted and Konan silenced me with a glare.

"If you can go from now until Itami leaves, meaning she naturally goes to sleep, no knocking her out, without any of that, Kakuzu, Sasori, and I will do whatever you guys want. However, should you guys lose you three have to do what Sasori, Kakuzu and I want. More rules are you have to socialize, you cannot go hideaway in your rooms, and I will be able to tell if you do it in your mind." Konan looked at us for any objections. I looked at the clock seeing it was almost eight.

"Can we have five minutes? Like start officially at eight?" I asked, Konan nodded. I grinned at her and began to list every vulgar term I had ever heard or known. I listed for four minutes and when I was done, well the reactions I received I found hilarious. Konan's eyes were bugging out and her mouth was open in shock while she had turned pale. Deidara had both eyebrows raised and his eyes widened slightly, he too had gone a shade paler. Hidan however, looked proud. Of course he also had slightly widened eyes and raised eyebrows.

"Damn." whistled Hidan and Konan looked to the clock. Regaining herself she smirked.

"Let the games begin, and may the odds be ever in your favor." With Konan's announcement, that sounded oddly familiar to me, we began.

The first three hours was spent with us sitting in a circle starring at each other. We teamed up of course seeing as how we would need someone to keep each other from swearing or using a verbal tick.

However Konan had a new idea. Seeing as how I was not a ninja, I was the target. So she decided to train me now, seeing as how I stupidly told her Orochimaru had made my chakra easier to use.

"C'mon, you can do it!" cheered Konan as Deidara and Hidan watched from the sidelines. I was glaring at Konan; she was trying to get me to limp up a tree. I'm on crutches, that means I can't do it! I also have no idea how to do it nor do I want to fall on my a-Konan is staring at me. I think she knows what I was about to say….

….Creepy…

Anyway, butt. I meant butt. I don't really feel like falling on my butt a load of times.

"But Itami! You have to!" whined Konan.

"I don't even know how to do it!" I complained.

"Well try!" snapped Konan. I glared at her and limped over to Deidara and plopped myself down right on his lap. He raised an eyebrow as I leaned back against his chest.

"I'm tired, shut up." I stated and Deidara sighed but put his head on top of mine.

"You two look so cute!" squealed Konan making Hidan laugh at us. Deidara and I just glared at her. After we had the redo kiss we hadn't particularly cared.

"Well I'm going to get something to eat, I'll know!" called Konan as she left. I got up using Deidara's head to hold me up. I hobbled over to the tree and gestured for Deidara and Hidan.

"Ok, you two are assisting me in this!" I decided as I tried to feel my chakra. Now here's my problem.

What does chakra feel like?

I had never had chakra before and I had no clue as to what I was supposed to do. I couldn't move my chakra and basically, it was hopeless. But I was still determined to get to the top of the stupid tree!

"So here's my theory," I started gaining the two men's attention, "I believe that if I can do something similar to what I did with the clay bird then I can control my chakra! And then boom! Top of the tree!"

Deidara shrugged and allowed me to lean on him as I tried to feel my chakra.

Focus!

Focus….

FOCUS

I could feel it. I could feel my chakra. It was like feeling…. it was like when you feel energetic. Like really energetic and hyper but I could feel it running through my body. Now all I needed to do was to grasp it.

How was I supposed to do that?

I spent some time trying to stop the flow of my chakra. it was harder than I thought and after about an hour of Deidara moving around while trying not to drop me, I had managed to learn how to actually extract the chakra from my blood and move it around my body.

"Ok." I took a deep breath and crutched over to the tree and placed one foot on it. I moved all the chakra I could get and then, with Deidara ready for me to fall, I lifted my other foot that had been keeping me up. I moved it fast and as I moved I tried to multitask and get the chakra ready for tree sticking.

I stayed.

…ok for about 5 seconds before I slid off. I left a small red blood trail too, like the hand prints I left on scrolls.

"Good job, ye-" Hidan covered Deidara's mouth in time, and I gave both of them a smirk.

"Ha! Soon I'll be running ninja speed and will stand a chance against you guys!" I yelled pointing a crutch at Hidan.

"Get that fuc-" I whacked Hidan in the face to get him to shut up. He fell backwards and landed on his back.

"Don't say anything!" I hissed as Hidan slowly got up while glaring at me. He said nothing but I could feel his hateful glare on me.

"Be a man!" I snapped as I turned back to the tree.

"I will beat you tree!" I yelled and I heard Deidara snort.

Here we go, again.

I found myself lying on the ground feeling dead about two hours later. Deidara was sitting next to me and Hidan was lying next to me.

"Well you made it up to the first branch." commented Deidara before he bit his tongue to stop himself from adding his verbal tick.

"Yeah, I did pretty good for a non-ninja girl." I mumbled as I closed my eyes. I sat still and I felt Deidara pick me up.

"She asleep?" asked Hidan.

"No." I answered and Hidan left us. Deidara carried me through the base to my room where he put me down on my bed gently and put my crutches against my side table.

"You did really good." Cue tongue bite again.

"Thanks." I muttered tiredly. I felt dead from all the training. As I felt myself slipping from the Narutoverse I felt something warm touch the scar on my forehead above my eye.

Deidara kissed me again…

TIME SKIP LINE OR WHATEVER

"So basically we're leaving to get the Two Tails and then we're going to go with the plotline and then I'm going to save their immortal asses?" I asked receiving a nod from Leader and glares from the immortal duo.

"Understood, I am now off my crutches and will not slow us down, I can also chakra run for a short amount of time according to Deidara." I explained.

"Good. You leave as soon as you are ready, dismissed." stated Leader and I left the room with the duo.

"We leave in less than an hour." ordered Kakuzu leaving to get his things. Hidan followed while complaining. I went to wait in the boulder room; I called it the boulder room because it was the front room and had a boulder for the door. I also had no creativity with names when I came up with it.

"Hey, Itami, yeah." I turned to Deidara and he held out a bag.

"They're some clay with your blood, un." explained Deidara as I took the bag.

"Thanks." I gave Deidara small half smile and he grinned at me.

"I don't want you getting hurt, so be careful. Got it, un?" added Deidara.

"I promise I'll be fine." I chuckled and Deidara pulled me into a hug before Konan came.

"You better not get hurt!" she snapped pulling Deidara away from me and pulling me into a big bear hug.

"I'll be fine guys, I'll be back before you know it." When the immortals returned, we left. However one last thing Deidara said to me was etched into my mind.

"Get back safe, Itami, I would die if something happened to you, yeah."

Deidara cared for me.

He actually cared for me.

Although I had bigger problems. The One Tail was an epic fail, I need some more plans for the fights with Asuma and all them. I also need to try and stop the fights from dragging out since back up will eventually come.

I hate planning.

* * *

**AN**

**Don't worry Itami, i hate planning too...**

**Ok next update may take awhile seeing as i need to watch teh Hidan and Kakuzu arc again instead of winging it like i did with teh OneTail, mehhh, or maybe i could look at other fanfictions... i dunno but don't expect it to be quick because i don't want it to be another epi fail.**

**I have 3 red lines on my face (I got them Wednesday) from being nailed with a softball. What was funny about it was I had a delayed reaction; the ball had already rolled away by the time I had realized I had been hit. I even laughed at myself while the girl who hit me panicked. She was afraid I'd kill her. I didn't kill her, just smacked her very hard on the arm. **

**OH! Its chapter 20, psyched! Can't believe it, 20 chapters! And over 100 reviews! I'm so proud! **

**There is a reference in here to something Lexi loves. Locate it if you feel like it.**

**I went to sleep like right after posting the last chapter and when I woke up for school I checked my Email on my phone and there were like, 15 reviews, mostly for Insomnia but there were a few for my other two stories. I was so surprised I almost fell off my bed. Great way to wake up in the morning.**

**Q-Hm... any ideas for what's going to happen with the newest plotline arc? The Hidan and Kakuzu arc of my story? **

**A-I reallllllllly want a labret but my mum's still a normalist, and she won't even let me get my nose or tongue! I guess now I can only deck out my ears, I'm thinking of either my cartilage or another hole in my lobe. Dunno which.**

**Shidonii-...**

**She didn't change anything in this chapter besides changing chakra to chakura, what is the real way of spelling it? B.y the way, i changed it back to chakra**

**Goodbye my lovelies**


	21. Before It All Went to Hell

**AN-**

**SOS! I'm drowning! Drowning in school work that is. Homework, in ART! Gahhh! The entire staff, save a few teachers that I like, should go die in a hole!**

**Enjoy the chapter, hopefully I get off my lazy ass to actually re watch the episodes while writing this.**

* * *

To say traveling with Hidan and Kakuzu was boring was an understatement. I was beyond bored! The only excitement I had was when we captured the Jinchuuriki and I almost died…

"Are we at the temple yet?" I complained receiving a dirty look from Kakuzu. I had been complaining for the past few hours nonstop. Hidan was enjoying the torture Kakuzu was going through though.

"We're almost there." stated Kakuzu in a monotone.

"You've been saying that for the last like hour!" I whined as Hidan snickered.

"We'll be there when we get there." stated Kakuzu. I sighed and turned to Hidan.

"Carry me." I stated and Hidan allowed me to climb up onto his back.

"You've been a lazy ass bitch lately." muttered Hidan. I snorted.

"Because I haven't had to do anything from my injuries." I explained and Hidan rolled his eyes but accepted the answer. Our walk continued.

"We're here." stated Kakuzu a _long_ time later, shaking Hidan and I from our glaring contest. Hidan dropped me on my ass receiving a few choice words from me. "Ungrateful asshole, you'll live because of me!"

"You can walk now bitch." decided Hidan, I looked forward.

"Fuck my life." I snapped seeing the problem.

Stairs.

"Itami, don't whine. Let's go." snapped Kakuzu and I slowly got up and followed the duo. It took forever for us to get up there, I swear!

"I'm just going to rest for a moment." I told the duo, they continued without me. I watched them disappear over the top of the stairs and followed after regaining the breath I had lost climbing the evil stairs of doom. I came up during Hidan and Kakuzu's conversation.

"Killing a priest is a one way ticket to hell." commented Hidan, pulling out his scythe.

"Even hell runs on money, I'll be fine." decided Kakuzu as Hidan went ahead. I stood next to the greedy miser.

"I love that quote." I decided, Kakuzu chuckled at me.

"Seriously! Its badass, even hell runs on money, fucking awesome." I decided as I watched Hidan make a few bloody sacrifices.

"This doesn't gross you out?" asked an amused Kakuzu.

"Nope, I'm perfectly fine with it." I replied as Kakuzu stepped in to help with Chiriku.

When that was over we got to haul Chiriku's dead body to the exchange point. Since Hidan was a dumb ass, he only watched the fight with Shikamaru, so when I went to follow Kakuzu to the mens bathroom, I got a comment.

"Oi, bitch, why're you going in the mens bathroom?" called Hidan, I turned to Hidan.

"Idiot, it's the exchange point!" I snapped, Hidan frowned and followed me to see if I was lying or not. We went in and the smell was fucking horrible!

"It smells like piss in here!" I muttered to Hidan who nodded in agreement as the exchange dude looked through his book.

"Eh, creeper beeper!" I muttered, hiding behind Hidan as another guy came into the room off of where the screen was. He was staring at me! Like I was some kind of new species or something… although with his ugly face I don't think any woman would go within five steps of him… so I could be something new to him…

"I'm taking Itami outside!" yelled Hidan grabbing my arm and pulling me out. I grinned, time for plan A to commence! Of course, if this went anything close to as planned then it would go much more smoothly than the One Tail, however Hidan's worse than Deidara. So, I'm taking a pretty big gamble here.

"Fresh air! Oh glorious fresh air!" I called as I feel onto the steps next to Hidan who also looked relieved to be out of the shit hole.

"So bitch, when are we going to fight?" asked Hidan. I chuckled.

"Sooner than you think." I stated ominously, Hidan just snorted.

"So bitch, what's going on with you and Deidara?" asked Hidan, I stopped my chuckling and started choking on air.

"Fuck what?" I asked, Hidan snorted at my words.

"You and Deidara, something has to be going on there." prodded Hidan. I poked his chest right above his pendant.

"Asshole, nothing's going on there." I snapped, Hidan merely snorted when we heard footsteps. I scooted away as Hidan turned.

"Kakuzu what the hell took you-" Hidan jumped back to avoid the shuriken and I put my hand into my clay pouch, ready to be ambushed by sneaky ninjas.

"Got you!" I heard someone, Kotetsu, say as I was scooped into someone's arms.

"Ah! Let go bastard!" I yelled as I pulled out a clay spider and threw it into Kotetsu's face.

"Izumo, I need help!" called Kotetsu as I squirmed while violently smashing my fist repeatedly into any part of him I could get.

"Hey get your hands of the bitch!" called Hidan as I was thrown, literally thrown much like when fighting Gaara, to Asuma who held me down. Kotetsu and Izumo took Hidan's distraction as yelling at Asuma and I, to stab him with the large knives.

"You fucktard! Look what you did! I told you to listen to me when I explained what was going to happen and now, you're getting internal damage!" I snapped, Hidan glared at me.

"Shut up bitch!" he snapped moving around a bit.

"This hurts like hell! This is no small injury, this fucking hurts!" yelled Hidan irritably as he moved around. I sighed and turned to Asuma who was holding my arms behind my back and had an arm around my neck.

"Hello Asuma, you might want to leave now. I can guarantee, someone will die." I stated ominously.

"We're taking you back to the Leaf, Itami I believe your name is." explained Asuma.

"Well your plan to take out one member, grab me, and get the other isn't going to work." I announced.

"You screwed up on the order!" cackled Hidan.

"Hidan's immortal." I chuckled; they all looked mortified at this revelation.

"You all have no chance and I know that at least one of you will die unless you run away right now, I'll even hold Hidan back for a little bit." I offered.

"We're taking you back with us, your knowledge is too valuable!" argued Asuma as a loud explosion came announcing Kakuzu's appearance.

"Whoopee, Kakuzu's here!" I cheered sarcastically before bashing my head back into Asuma's. Although being a ninja, I did nothing to him other than annoy him and possibly break his nose, not that he cared.

"Kakuzu assistance!" I yelled to the miser who just stood by Hidan ready to fight. Izumo and Kotetsu had jumped away and Shikamaru was standing by them.

"Itami, stop making a show." scolded Kakuzu; I gave him a blank look.

"Motherfucking bastard, help me!" I snapped, Kakuzu ignored me. The fucker.

"Oi save the bitch and stay out of the fight so I can take care of them!" ordered Hidan and Kakuzu jumped over at us. Asuma jumped back, nearly choking me to death, and dodged.

"Kakuzu just use your string thing!" I ordered. Kakuzu ignored me and I yell in frustration. I have been yelling a lot lately, I blame stress…

Why do I have stress?

Well, the Akatsuki boys are idiots, hot idiots but idiots, save a few intelligent ones. I'm being held hostage, and I am also in a dangerous situation that has a high chance of death for me since I have like no ninja powers, or ones that I can use freely.

"Fuck!" I snapped as my head was yanked.

"Fucker release me!" I snapped kicking backwards successfully hitting my target, you should know where that target is. Of course Asuma let go of me and I turned around doing a very impressive split that had me kick Asuma almost with my leg vertically. I then fled to Kakuzu so that Asuma wouldn't have the chance to retaliate, ninja vs. girl, girl not win. And I am that girl.

The rest of the fight from there went similarly to the anime; of course I just had to step in to avoid having to listen to Hidan bitch about his head getting cut off.

"Oi! Stop fooling around you shithead!" I called as Shikamaru began to get him out of the circle of Jashin.

"Bitch! Why didn't you warn me?!" shouted Hidan.

"Asshole I did!" I yelled, Hidan glared at me as Asuma tested out that he was no longer part of Hidan's Jutsu.

"And off with his head." I laughed as Asuma's blade sliced through Hidan's neck, splattering blood, and ultimately making Hidan shut up in shock.

"One down." stated Asuma turning around to face us.

"Not quite, Hidan stop being a fucktard and get serious!" I snapped.

"Bitch shut the hell up!" Asuma, Shikamaru, Kotetsu, and Izumo gawked. I almost laughed, almost. It was hilarious though. I love moments like these where I can goof off.

"Kakuzu, could you pretty please bring my body over here and sew it back on?" pleaded Hidan in a whiny voice. I walked over to his head and gripped it by his hair.

"Ouch! Bitch I said body not head!" screeched Hidan.

"Your heads lighter because its empty." I commented, Kakuzu snorted and I bet he was smirking under his mask. I brought over Hidan's head and handed it off to Kakuzu before picking up Hidan's headband and pendant. I stuffed them in my pocket and watched, fascinated, as Kakuzu sewed Hidan's head back on.

"Alright!" cheered Hidan as his body was moveable again. Then it went much like the anime with Kakuzu owning Kotetsu and Izumo.

"Hidan, wrap it up!" I called as Kakuzu finished it up.

"NO!" shouted Shikamaru, slowly running pointlessly to Hidan. Hidan simply stabbed himself through the heart, I laughed at the sadness. Call me heartless, I don't care bitches.

"Well I'm bored, watch out for the black sword in the crows Kakuzu!" I called walking over to Hidan who shielded me from the birds. Leader called, obviously wanting us to get moving, and Hidan complained.

"Itami, use your chakra." ordered Kakuzu.

"Wait Kakuzu I'm not that good at it yet!" I shouted, but they were already moving.

"Jashin damn it!" I screeched, greattt. It was just me, and ninja who were not on my side.

I'm doomed.

* * *

**AN-**

**I wrote this over the course of 4 days, and I didn't watch the episodes because I'm too lazy. By the way, I'm really behind on the anime, and I just watched Minato and Kushina die, it was sad. I am also now watching Kisame die, also very sad.**

**We had breast cancer day in school, all the teachers wore pink(I wore a skull shirt and got some dirty looks from a few teachers) and my Spanish teacher, Mr. H, whined that the office ladies were mean because they said he looked like a stuffed sausage, they weren't lying. I laughed when he said it, he called me mean too. I continued my laughing.**

**Ah yes, the other day I got out of 1st** **period algebra because of school presidential elections. My bud K was running but some bitchy, whiny, fucker won. I happen to greatly dislike the winner, like really dislike her and every time I see her, I want to fucking punch her in the face. She pisses me off that much! Anyway, K was bugging me to put her in the story, so she's in my authors note. She should feel loved.**

**I'm extremely sad right now… in the beginning of October I told my dad I wanted to be Konan, and then last night he brought it up. I had specifically told him in the beginning of the month that we had to get it online. However now it'll take too long and my dad's mad at me and I'm mad at him and my mum's ready to cry because we both snap at her since she tries to get us hot headed people to calm down. Now I can't be Konan, although my dad already ordered a Konan wig, so what can I be using a Konan wig? I was thinking of taking my Harry potter cloak and sticking on some red clouds, however I don't want to ruin that cloak. So what do you my lovely readers suggest I do? If there are any stores that have Naruto costumes I will be a very happy person.**

**Q-Alright! So, what do you thinks going to happen? Is Itami going to somehow go ninja on them? Or is she going to get her ass kicked? I love detailed answers.**

**A-Well fuck, what was the question? Ohhh, well that can't be answered can it. I basically just asked the same question over again…**

**Sayonara my lovelies.**


	22. Halloween

**AN-**

**This takes place between chapters 19 and 21, somewhere along there. It's after Orochimaru but before she left with Hidan and Kakuzu.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

_Insomnia Halloween Special_

It was Halloween. I of course was a very pleased person at the moment as I was in my ninja costume; a black full body suit with a ski mask that showed my mouth, eyes, and all my piercings since they would get caught if they weren't showing. My brothers were going as a double costume, so Chris was the ass of the donkey, Jack was the front.

"So Chris, you're the ass of the ass?" I laughed, they were actually supposed to be a centaur but it reminded me more of a donkey. Besides, they're my brothers. I have to mess with them.

"Stop being so mean Tami, its Halloween, be nice!" cried Jack as Chris swore at me from his position as an ass. I laughed as the doorbell rang. I answered it, ready to spray a child with red silly string, and deflated when I noticed it was my friends.

Sky and Josh were going as Katniss and Peeta from the Hunger Games. Sky had asked me for a bow and some arrows, I don't know where she got the impression I had them… I still let her borrow them though. Shut up.

Kayan was going as Cosmo from some kid show, I'm pretty sure it was the Fairly Odd Parents or something like that. I forgot. She had her hair up under a green wig that had once been a Justin Beiber styled one that she had dyed green. I didn't tell her but the wig was rubbing the dye off onto her hair, I was going to laugh when she realized.

Kirai was a vampire, she fit the part with her already pale complexion, reddish-pink eyes, and her white hair was just amazing. Plus she was sun sensitive just like a real vampire.

Violet was being Hinata from Naruto, she looked awesome. Her contacts made her eyes look awesome, of course they made it almost impossible for her to see clearly and Kirai was clearly having a great time making fun of her for this. She also had a wig and she had put something in her bra to give her large boobs, she looked a lot like Hinata with them.

Finally Evelyn. She had her orange hair pulled back under a white wig. Her eyes were a pale green so they were already good. She was already pale from whatever was wrong with her so that was good. She made a wonderful ghost.

We all looked amazing; of course I was still upset that they weren't children I could shoot with silly string. I shot Kayan with it anyway; she was now Cosmo with red silly string all over her.

"Bitch." muttered Kayan as we left to trick or treat. I loved walking around trick or treating because I could make fun of people, see where people lived and scare the crap out of them, and stuff like that. But that's not why I was excited.

The school threw a Halloween party.

Costume contests, other contests, food, and stuff like that. So once we were done messing around with the trick or treaters we were going there.

Nothing much really happened on our way to the school, I shot a bunch of people with silly string, was scolded by Evelyn when she realized all the weapons I had on me(Including my swords) were in fact, real. I was also challenged to a samurai vs. ninja battle by some kid in a samurai costume.

He never stood a chance.

After proving ninjas were better than samurai, we were off. We toilet papered Kehoe's house and I egged his car after shooting it with silly string. I was so nice.

We finally made it to the party and nothing much happened there, I announced that Chris was the ass of an ass, I won the most awesome costume contest after everyone realized that I was in fact, covered in real weapons, and I beat up Kayan when she started to get annoying. That was after I threw my candy apple at her and it stuck to her wig and made it fall off. She freaked about her now green hair. I laughed.

Halloween was such a nice holiday.

However my favorite part was probably later on in the Narutoverse.

_0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0_

The Narutoverse had a similar festival to Halloween and after me arguing with Leader, then having Konan help me beg him, then we had to beg Kakuzu, after all that we ended up going to the festival in costumes.

Hidan and Kakuzu were zombies, I forced Kisame to be a shark, he was not happy with me, I made Itachi be a vampire, he didn't particularly care, and the rest all did their own. Sasori was a puppet; I had threatened him to change so he stabbed himself through the chest, opposite of his heart container so he wouldn't die of course. Tobi was a lollipop and Zetsu was a carnivorous plant that had threatened to eat me when I joked that he was an aloe plant. Then Deidara was a, I refused to admit this out loud when Konan tried to get me to, handsome devil.

He had his hair messier than usual (This took more effort to do than for him to make his hair look good! I demand the he stop being a Mary Sue with his hair!) and he had a ripped up dark red shirt on that showed he was in fact very muscular, and he had allowed Konan to actually do makeup on him and all in all, he was fucking HOT. I swear I would never admit this out loud, ever.

When went to go to the festival, Konan, who was a very nice angel with her paper wings and white dress and stuff, had tried to get me to admit that Deidara was handsome.

"Gee Itami, doesn't Deidara just look so, handsome?" she teased as she leaned over my shoulder to whisper in my ear.

"Shut it, you're supposed to be an angel, not an evil devil." I muttered, she just laughed and led me to where our group of hot men was standing around.

I had actually been forced to change out of my "Shitty ninja costume" as Hidan had so nicely put it. I was now wearing an evil angel costume; Konan was good I was bad. I had a tight black top that was open back and it left my stomach out. Then I had a dark red short skirt and black tights that led to my boots. I had small black angel wings, and instead of a harp and halo like Konan I had small devil horns and weapons.

"Sexy." stated Hidan in approval as he looked me over. Moments later, a weapon that I had on me still from my ninja costume was launched at him and it dug into his forehead. Luckily it only helped his costume look more epic.

We trouped to the festival where they had more costume contests. There were couples, groups, and singles. I had a feeling Konan had put me and her in for one, and maybe me and Deidara in for another. I knew she put in Kakuzu and Hidan though, it would be stupid not to.

"Hey Itami, enjoying the festival, un?" asked Deidara as he plopped down next to me. I was sitting peacefully on the bench by the game that happened to be very violent…

"Yeah, it's pretty cool. It's better than my world's celebration, well; I like the getting candy part, however this festival is violent and fun." I explained, hello, violence! That's like, the best thing in the world for me. Deidara laughed in response.

"You're too funny Itami, un. You like it because you get _candy_, yeah?" laughed Deidara.

"Hey! I also get to scare the crap out of others and hit them with stuff and annoy them. Oh and I got challenged to a ninja against samurai battle, I won obviously." I defended, Deidara snorted.

"So what's so god about this festival, hm?" asked Deidara.

"Well, it's more violent and aggressive, I don't have to watch… oh three to five teenagers that act like children, I can spend time with my Akatsuki, and I get to be more violent because you guys can handle me throwing actual weapons. I don't get lectured on how dangerous it is and how I shouldn't carry weapons around." I explained.

"So what ones better, hm?"

"This one, definitely." I decided. Deidara grinned.

"Want to go get some cotton candy? Since its orange I think it's a better flavor than usual, yeah." offered Deidara. I nodded and we ended up sharing the cotton candy. The flavor was some kind of candy, it reminded me of dango, I was extremely pleased with this, as was Itachi who was shooting me glares for eating some. He was so a dango addict.

Then Deidara and I just chilled out in the forest waiting for everyone, Kisame and Hidan were probably drunk, Sasori was probably helping Kakuzu keep an eye on them, and Konan had disappeared along with Tobi and Zetsu.

"Itami, if you could stop yourself from ever coming to this world, would you, yeah?" inquired Deidara. I thought about it.

"Hm…" I thought about my answer carefully, "I wouldn't, I like it here and I have a lot of fun with you guys."

"Great, un. I'd probably miss you a lot if you left us, yeah." admitted Deidara. I gave him a small smile.

"That means a lot, Deidara." Our faces moved towards each other, slowly. When we were only inches apart… no one interrupted. Our lips touched and like the redo kiss, it was like a cheesy moment with sparks flying through my body. I wonder if Deidara felt it too.

I could hear the contest winners being announced in the background as we pulled apart.

"…and the couples winner is… the evil Akatsuki angel and the Akatsuki devil…" I smirked at Deidara who smirked right back.

"C'mon Mr. Devil, we need to go get our prize." I said and Deidara laughed.

I didn't find out until later but the couples contest was for actually couples, like romance and stuff. Deidara and I turned slightly red and told Konan that she was the true evil angel.

Happy Halloween

* * *

**AN**

**I just got my WiFi back from the hurricane today, i am now watching my nephew while his mom goes to fight for gas. He's sleeping and looks adorable.**

**Anyways I went trick or treating with my cousin, my baby second cousin, and my cousin's friend, her friend's boyfriend, and their little son. Because of the hurricane there's like blocks that have no power and huge trees blocking everything and its pretty messy here.**

**I actually saw my friend Joey, and as I was talking to him the recycle truck was coming around and the man got off to do Joey's recycling. Then the truck took off down the block… without the man. I laughed like a retard, Joey laughed but tried to get me to shut up, "Shut up! Don't let him here you!", of course the gossiping ladies across the street were laughing louder than me. The truck came back when it reached the end of the block and realized they had left the guy back at Joey's house.**

**Anyways, next chapter will have my authors rant on my overnight school trip to Boston, you have been warned. No Q's this chapter because I'm ready for sleep.**

**Anyways, Halloween wasn't today so i am sorry it wasn't posted on Halloween but Halloween was almost canceled. If you don't celebrate Halloween... well... happy November 1st. **

**Expect my next real Insomnia chapter today if Shidonii-kun is willing to Beta.**

**Ta-ta for now my lovelies.**


	23. Dangerous Happenings

**An**

**I believe the ending of this chapter is a bit of a mind fuck, enjoy.**

* * *

At first my chakra allowed me to start to flee. Of course then one of the ninja decided to notice me and he allowed me to flee right into him.

"Well fuck." I decided when I jumped back only to find another ninja calmly coming towards me. I looked around and dug around in my clay pouch.

"Deidara you fucker, you had better of put it in there!" I muttered before smirking when I located it. I pulled it and a few smoke bombs out.

"Ha!" I yelled as I threw the smoke bombs down. Smoke spewed out and surrounded a good area around me. I managed to pull the clay bird from my bag and throw it to the ground. It enlarged and I jumped on it, I made my connection and got ready to take off. As the birds wind made a gust, the smoke cleared but I was able to get up pretty high.

"Don't let her escape!" yelled one of the ninja and I heard something slam into the bird. I turned and swore. A kunai with an explosive tag. I broke the connection and dove off my bird, I was pretty high up but I would rather land and break a few bones than explode.

"Get her!" I landed harshly and my leg made a very unappealing noise from landing.

"Damn it." I mumbled as I stood up as fast as possible and I began to stumble away. Of course I fell onto my chest when my leg made me collapse. I was ready to be captured; of course I would go down with breaking all their ears by swearing and screeching at the top of my lungs but…

"Crap." I muttered seeing tentacles come from the trees. What's worse…

A pissed Kakuzu or Konohana torture?

I tried to crawl away after deciding a pissed Kakuzu, but the tentacles wrapped around me and pulled me away. I was pulled right to Kakuzu who held me up by my shirt and glared at me.

"I never said I was able to use my chakra quickly, I said I could chakra run for a short distance but I need to be given a few moments!" I snapped, Kakuzu narrowed his eyes and threw me to Hidan who caught me.

"Damn bitch, your legs screwed up again." muttered Hidan, my ankle was sideways, SIDEWAYS! I can't catch a break can I?

I was carried by Hidan to the spot where Kakuzu healed my ankle to the point I could walk, then they left to do the sealing.

_o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0 o0o0o0o0o0o_

My sanctuary was with my world. It was incredibly boring just sitting there with Kakuzu and Hidan's motionless bodies. So whenever I was in my world I was amused. As such a moment like this.

"Jack Louis Duncan you stop doing that right now!" snapped my mother who was finally healed and able to move around again. The car accident fucked her up pretty good, all was well now. She just needed a cane now.

"But mom! Even Itami finds it funny, right Itami?" asked Jack turning to me. Chris, who was sitting on the couch with his laptop, snorted.

"She doesn't find anything funny!" he laughed. I frowned at him before frowning at Jack.

"I admit it amuses me, but not to the point of laughing." I admitted.

"See? She does feel!" yelled Jack pointing at Chris. I face palmed catching the attention of Jack who stared at me, waiting.

"Well fuck that hurt." I stated as I felt my piercings sting from face palming. Note to self, never face palm when piercings are in. I am so going to ignore that later.

"Oh hey, Itami, by the way, your friend, that crazy one, Kaya or something called the house looking for assistance." called Chris as Jack tried to knock him off the couch from an earlier comment he had made.

"Ok, I'll call her back." I stated and he nodded as Jack succeeded in pulling him off. Of course Chris yelled and tried to protect his laptop from the fall. My mother just sighed and left the room, obviously wondering how Jack ended up so… strange.

I went up to my room and grabbed the house phone before calling Kayan's house. She picked it up and a rushed and obnoxious hi was yelled through the phone upon her realizing I was the caller.

"Shut up Kayan, what did you need?" I asked and I heard her yell at her siblings through the phone for eavesdropping.

"Well, this kids picking on me at my after school art club and I wanted you to beat him up!" My eyebrow twitched.

"What am I? A weapon or something!" I snapped and I heard her sigh.

"Please Itami?" she begged. I sighed.

"Fine, we're going through the city though because I like making fun of the homeless hobos."(Aww, I enjoy hobo's...) Kayan snickered; I got the habit from her. In the city just outside of the suburban housing area there were huge buildings, busy and crowded streets and a ton of homeless people.

"Fine, I'll meet you at Dick's." There was this ice cream place just on the border of the city and the suburbs and there was a small food shop that sold random things like ice cream, yogurt, sweets, it was a really popular place. Its real name was Dixie's but that sounded stupid.

I walked there at my normal fast speed. I was pretty ticked actually that I had to go to Kayan's art club; it was all the way in the middle of the city portion of our town.

"Itami!" called Kayan. Kayan had that personality that made me want to knock her out and ship her to China. She was loud, annoying, and was obsessed with little kid cartoons, mainly Fairly Odd Parents. She had long dirty blonde hair that was more brown than blonde and light sea blue-green eyes. Today she had a Perry the Platypus hat with a red and white Eminem shirt and she was wearing guy jeans with her skate boarding sneakers, she stood out a lot.

"Itami!" she greeted as she pulled me in for a hug. Immediately she let go when she felt me tense in irritation.

"Right, no touching, sorry." she muttered sheepishly as she rubbed her hair. Our personalities, much like Sky and I, were opposites. However one reason I liked Kayan as a friend was that she had a large chest just like me! She knew how I felt whereas Sky had nothing, Evelyn had a smallish one, then Kirai and Kikai had medium sized busts. Of course Kayan liked calling us sex goddesses since in my town you were lucky to find someone with Kirai's size bust, apparently Kayan and I were blessed or something.

"Let's go, I want to beat him up and go." I stated and we walked through the city. Our large busts showed, even with my baggy sweatshirt and Kayan's tomboyish qualities.

I beat up the kid. Simple as that. He was in the grade above us and was one of those jocks that had to do the extracurricular thing other than sports; he chose art since it was easy. However he was a douche bag who I had to beat up since he made fun of my bud. Kayan applauded me as I beat him up. We left the parking lot when it started getting dark.

"Damn my sixth sense." I muttered as I felt a bad feeling well in my chest.

"What's the matter?" asked Kayan as we took a shortcut through an alley. Usually I wouldn't care, however my bad feeling….

"Well, well, well." Ok, flashback time.

Remember awhile ago when I was beat up by this kid Grimly? Then I kicked his ass? Well guess who was in front of us, with his gang mates nonetheless.

"Well, this is not the best situation." I mumbled as I observed my opponents.

Besides Grimly there was a tall bald guy who had a large tattoo on his muscled arms. There was also a dark skinned man with eyes hidden behind black sunglasses. And I spied with my little eye a black switchblade and a silver one.

"We've been waiting for you, I'm not happy you beat me in an unfair fight! So now you're going to pay up!" he snapped. I made to make a sarcastic comment, but then he pulled it out. I heard Kayan gasp besides me. I clenched my fist.

A gun.

Kayan wasn't good with fights, she had no muscle or weaponry skills like I did. And his fight was with me too. Not her.

"Kayan, run!" I barked pushing her back. She took off without question; she knew to listen to me. All my friends knew that if I told them to run, they had better. Because if I say to run, it means I can't take that fight. It means I stand no chance.

"Fuck, one, two, three." I began to count and breathe calmly. I needed to stay calm. I needed to focus, I needed to think. All I could focus on however, was the black barrel of the gun pointed at me. More specifically, at my face. Grimly was coming closer, with every step he made I took one back. I had to go slow, no sudden movements.

It's like a game. However it's not very fun, nor would I recommend it.

"You're going down!" laughed Grimly. I am beginning to think this guy is insane. Anyone else?

_Click_

There went the safety lock on the gun.

I started running backwards, eyes on the gun. My eye switched from the gun to his face, then to the finger pressing down on the trigger. His aim switched to my chest, right about where my heart would be. Maybe, if I timed it right I could jump out of the way of the gun and pretend to be dead. Or I could run like Hidan was chasing me because I interrupted his ritual.

"Boom." he whispered and it seemed to go by in slow motion much like the car crash. My eyes widened as his finger squeezed. I jumped to the side, too slow. The shot rang out, loudly. I saw it as a clock. One second, no more, to move, or possibly until I die. I felt a burning pain in the left side of my chest, right where my heart was. I felt myself spit up some blood as I felt backwards.

I landed with a thump. I heard Kayan run over, more footsteps from that way. She keeled next to me and I heard someone calling for the police, maybe an ambulance. Hopefully an ambulance.

I started choking on blood coming up from my throat; even some spit was choking me. I was having trouble breathing. Someone applied pressure to my chest and I looked down. My black sweatshirt had been removed and my dark blue tank top was a dark purple-red color and it was slowly advancing. I was heavily bleeding from a hole in my chest.

"Itami, hang in there!" I heard someone yell. Black dots were starting to rush across my vision.

"Crap, she's losing blood fast! He must have hit a lung or an artery or something!" I heard someone yell.

"Hang in there Itami!" The black dots were starting to grow with more color inside them. What was happening? Was I dying?

"Tami!" Was that… Jack? Chris?

I felt like I was in a limbo, everything was blurry; I could feel pain all over me. My vision kept zoning in and out. I had no idea what was happening either. I was deeply confused.

Time must have passed. I kept hearing broken phrases.

"…my fault…" Kayan? Was that Kayan? Was she ok?

"…steady heart rate… "

A beeping, a high pitched one followed by, "She's crashing, stabilize her!"

"Itami…live…" Jack's voice.

"C'mon baby sis, you're strong…." Chris…

Suddenly, everything was gone. No noise, no vision, nothing. Then my vision was back. I was standing In a hospital room, I could see Jack and Chris.

"Jack, Chris!" I called, they didn't move. I frowned.

"Guys?" What were they doing in a hospital anyway? I moved over and saw…me.

There I was, lying in the hospital bed. Monitors were all over me, the blanket was pulled up to my bellybutton but above that was just a bra, then you could see an already red stained cloth over what must be my bullet wound. It wasn't by my heart, but I'm pretty sure it punctured a lung, judging by the gun it was a powerful launch and I was close to them. I'm thinking the bullet plowed through my chest, through my lung, through my back and maybe out into the wall.

"Jashin." I breathed. My piercings were in; I could see blood stains on my skin, probably from a surgery they performed on me. I could see my chest rise and fall, barley. I was breathing shallowly. I had a machine helping me breathe I think, it was weird. I had so many machines hooked up to me. I walked over to a chart that had my vitals and stuff on it. It also had what was wrong with me.

"Collapsed lung with bullet hole, ripped pulmonary artery, stitches needed in chest and back, second bullet hole hitting head." I read, I looked to my head. True to it there was also a soaked bandage on the side of my bed. It probably just grazed me.

"Head injury, blood transfusion." I continued. Head injury? I probably hit something when I fell. And I remember losing a ton of blood. I obviously needed the transfusion.

"Heart failure?" I gasped, I read more into that.

"Ruptured pulmonary artery created lack of oxygen that caused heart failure to occur, stabilized during surgery. As a side note, abnormal condition where heart is on the right side of the chest, rather than middle-left" I closed my eyes and breathed out. Well, this definitely wasn't good. Suddenly, I felt something land on my shoulder. I turned and found a woman standing there. She had pale gold-silver hair that fell in curvy strands down her back. A pure white tunic like dress wrapped around her thin frame and ended down by her bare feet. Her silver eyes seemed to pierce my soul and what caught my attention the most was the white angel wings that erupted from her back in large feathery arches.

An angel.

I think I'm pretty fucked up if I'm seeing an angel.

"Itami." and she knows my name, this can't be good. She gave me a warm smile before frowning. Her next words made me freeze.

"You are supposed to be dead."

* * *

**AN-**

**Eh hem, i do not know if the hospital terms are right, and i failed most of the human body tests last year in my honors science so if the heart fact is wrong... oh well. I don't even know if your heart could be somewhere else as a birth defect. i made it up, get over it.**

**My trip DOUBLED the amount of words from like 2500 to 5000 so I doubt you want my authors note to be THAT long. If you really want to hear about my hilarious and awesome trip then I can PM it to you. I will tell you this, it involed torturous stairs, hilarious reactions, sleep talking, peanut butter fudge, stomach aches, food throwing, people annoying me, funny teachers, and unlucky happenings. It was a very good trip and I wish that my school wasn't such a mother fucking fucker and had us go last year and go to Washington this year like we were supposed to and the year before us did but NO my year is the fucking guinea pigs so we don't get to go! If the year under us go on both I'm suing. **

**Q-What do you think? Do you think the angels a good guy or bad guy, how about Kayan? Do you like her? And finally, what do you thinks going to happen.**

**A-I'm pretty sure it was a what do you thinks going to happen question**

**Goodbye my lovelies**

**Shidonii- I just decided to take forever. With everything happening, I was so busy and couldn't get the laptop! I'm soo sorry! I hope to get Stoic Love sent to her tomorrow for those that read it.**


	24. Can't Catch a Break

**AN**

**Fairly long chapter ahead my lovelies. It reached 3000 words with barely any help from the authors note.**

**It may be slightly of a mind fuck, although I doubt it since I've been trying to hint towards what is going on slightly.**

**Enjoy.**

**Oh, AND CHECK OUT THE NEW STORY PICTURE! I worked really hard on it.**

**And its also on my deviantart, there's a link to my account on my profile, its at the top. You can ignore the mass of stuff that is the rest of my profile.**

* * *

"You are supposed to be dead."

Cue the heart stopping and gawking. I felt my mouth hit the floor as she continued to frown at me. Well! That is not good, not good at all!

"Allow me to explain, Itami." she stated as she lifted her hand from its spot on my shoulder.

"There are many worlds." she began; I already knew this from meeting that girl, what was her name? I don't remember, all I know is she wanted me dead.

"In each world is one human that has another version of that human in another world, by being in both Earth and what you would call the Narutoverse you are upsetting the balance, there can be no Itami in one world, but there cannot be two Itami's in one world." explained the angel. I nodded, understanding it.

"Since you are traveling between the two worlds the inter-dimensional beings have decided to eliminate you, that is why you are right now lying in a comatose state. You have a particularly strong attachment to many people though and your spirit is also stronger than most so the beings interference was not enough to kill you. That is why you are now in a comatose state. Your body, is in a coma and your soul, is here." I understood it all. I nodded at the angel.

"So basically, I'm screwing the worlds up so I've got a load of inter-dimensional beings trying to kill me. Great." I sighed. She smiled at me and I perked up slightly.

"Wait, why exactly am I traveling between worlds anyway?" I asked. The angel frowned.

"We believe an occurrence involving time warps, dimensional holes, and the Prime Being is involved with this but we do not know for certain." she stated, I understood about 5% of what she had said. What the hell was a "Prime Being". I voiced my question.

"What's a Prime Being?" I inquired. She laughed, it reminded me much of bells.

"You're only a human, Itami, you have no need to know that, or the mental capacities at this very moment to understand it." she clarified. She basically just called me unintelligent. I nodded and she turned to my body.

"I cannot fix your body in this world; you are to stay in the Narutoverse until your body heals itself. However this ill damage your soul, your dimensional travels have been further injuring your soul, it has been cutting the strings of fate that tie you to the world. Every time it switches bodies, it cuts one of your strings. Basically, you are running out of energy if you want it in simpler terms. Soon you will have to choose one world, Itami, and say goodbye to the other one forever." My eyes widened.

"What? You mean as I travel each night, every time I yawn, it means I'm slowly dying?" I asked, she nodded as everything began to change to white.

"Your destiny lies in your insomnia." she whispered as I faded from everything. The last thing I saw was Jack and Chris crying over my body, my soulless body.

_0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o _

I woke up to find Kakuzu and Hidan over my sore body. They were both wearing worried expressions, I looked down to see that I in fact, had a bleeding hole in my chest and my head was also bleeding.

"Help?" I whispered hoarsely as I coughed up blood. Immediately Kakuzu set out to healing and stitching me up. I very quickly was fixed.

"Damn bitch, what happened?" asked Hidan as soon as I was good as new.

"In my world, I was with my friend Kayan. However when we were walking through the city a gang member pulled a weapon, a gun, it shoots bullets at you, it's dangerous and deadly, anyway, he shot me in the chest and head. I'm in a coma in my world, I'm stuck here." I explained, they nodded.

"That is not good." decided Kakuzu I sweat dropped. No, really? I sighed and stood up shakily before I cracked my arms and knees. I nodded, satisfied by the noises, before I turned to my ninja companions.

"Ok, so now we're going to get down to business. We're going to go by the storyline and fake your deaths." I announced, both listened attentively.

"We're going to walk through the forest with the dead trees that if you ask me looks like a desert and I think it should be in the Wind country, however what do I know? Anyway then when they attack I'll shout warnings from my safe spot on a tree root. Then you guys are going to create lovely clones that somehow act like bodies and you'll ninja your way out of there with me and we'll all be happy-ish." I explained.

"And if we can't make clones like that?" asked Kakuzu. I thought about it.

"Well then, my wonderful plan is gone and we're stuck winging it like I did with Sasori and Deidara, worst comes to worse me and you split, let Hidan get killed, then go back for him later." I decided.

"Oi! Fuck you bitch!" snapped Hidan. I turned to him and opened my mouth to respond however Kakuzu put a hand over my mouth.

"Silence Itami, ignore the moron. We need to continue our plans." And with that, the idiot was ignored and we continued on with our planning.

_0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o _

Setting it in motion wasn't hard. All I had to do was pretend I had no idea the bird was Ino and let Kakuzu figure it out on his own. Then when we reached where Shikamaru was, I ran ahead and allowed Kakuzu and Hidan to go along as planned. We'd basically just go at the end, we were going to switch with the clones as Hidan was about to be led away by Shikamaru. I think the plan was going to go well. But the problem was…

When did anything every go well for me?

After Hidan and Kakuzu had been caught with exclamations and swearing from Hidan, I hadn't counted on my presence changing anything. I was wrong. I was scooped up by Kakashi and of course me against Kakashi was a no win situation for me. I of course was not going to go easy on him.

"Fucker release me!" I screeched like a banshee as soon as he had touched me. Along with my squirming and shouts Kakashi almost dropped me twice.

"Stop moving!" grumbled Kakashi as I continued to bitch, whine, swear, and screech. Yes, like I would listen to him.

"God damn it put me down or else Jashin will sentence you to hell!" I barked. Kakashi almost dropped me once more but managed to keep a good grip on me as he landed by Ino. With her help them managed to use wire to tie me up, of course I also gave Ino a bloody nose witch my boot. Her fault for getting too close to my leg. Well, I don't think she was expecting my leg to bend that way either…

As they left me with Ino I found that perhaps I could fight her, she had speed but it was like going against a slower Lee! Only she doesn't pack as much of a punch. She really only had mind Jutsu and those did shit against me! So all I had to do was get out of my binds.

Wire is very hard to get through by the way. I had to pull a file from my foot, a knife from my other boot, and pliers that I had in my boot for emergencies much like this one. The combined effort led up to me slowly rising behind the unsuspecting Ino. I looked from her to the knife I had in my hand. It wasn't a big one, but if I managed to hit her right, I could knock her out. Or I could hit her in the head with the end of my steel toed boots…

I decided on the boot. So I basically managed to walk up the tree, do a flip off of it, and try and bring my boot down on the back of her head. Unfortunately, she dodged and noticed me.

"Damn you, you just had to notice." I swore as I pulled out my clay spiders. I had nothing against accidentally killing someone with Deidara's spiders because it'd be a quick-ish death, especially if I hit the head like I aim for. And so, I threw the clay spiders at her as I pulled one of two clay birds I had left from my pouch. I dropped it on the floor and jumped on. I threw some clay crickets at Ino to distract her as my bird flew up. She ran up the tree after me but I flew away from it. I looked down and saw that my plan was working well. I flew down next to Kakuzu and sent the bird to explode by our enemy.

"Good, you got away." stated Kakuzu upon noticing me. I nodded. Everything was going well; I think this might actually work!

Of course in thinking that the irony fairy decided to flip me off.

"Fucker, bitch, look out!" I heard Hidan call. I didn't know why, until it was too late. I tried to move and Kakuzu certainly expected me to dodge or do something, but sadly it came as a shock, literally. Pain flew through my entire chest area.

"Crap," I heard Kakashi mutter, "I was supposed to hit the other, I couldn't stop in time."

Blood dribbled from the sides of my mouth and I looked down. Kakashi's still electrified hand was sticking from my chest. Kakuzu had been standing behind me, I hadn't noticed Kakashi and he couldn't stop after Kakuzu jumped away to safety. I laughed despite the pain it gave me. I coughed after I finished, blood ended up in my hand. I stared at it for a moment.

"I just can't catch a break." I muttered hoarsely as Kakashi pulled his hand out. I looked down to see that blood was pouring out of me. I was surprised I wasn't dead; of course I did have a shit load of blood.

"Fuckers! Look what you did to the bitch!" yelled Hidan as Kakuzu Spartan kicked Kakashi into a tree a good amount of space away. I think Kakashi was probably trying to figure out what to do and thus he was distracted, allowing Kakuzu to Spartan kick him easily.

"Hang in there bitch!" called Hidan as he and Kakuzu made a few hand signs. It looked like they had made shadow clones and the clone were carrying me, but I knew better. I had the real ones as their blood clones, that I had helped develop with some studying of my special blood, ran away. I started blacking out as we reached the base, full speed.

I heard them all panic. I was pouring blood, probably deathly pale, and I knew that I was probably going to die. I mean, I had a hole in my chest.

I think everyone's out to get me. I blame that girl, the one that I met in the One Tail sealing fight; if not for her I'd be perfectly fine. She's the one who's making the inter-dimensional-beings hate me. It's her fault for them wanting to kill me.

So here's my question.

Am I really going to die? Maybe I should just give in, it'd be easier…

"Itami! Don't give up, un! Don't close your eyes, yeah!" I heard Deidara yelling.

'Don't give in, don't give in to death. If you did, think of how everyone would feel.' I heard part of my brain whisper.

How would my death make everyone feel? Would they be sad? Mad? Happy?

How would my brothers feel if I died?

I thought back to the hospital, them crying. Them begging me not to give up, to stay alive. They wouldn't want me to die, they'd be sad.

How would the Akatsuki feel?

They'd be, sad I think. They were worried, panicked when Kakuzu brought me in. And when I was with Orochimaru, they were all worried and angry at what he had done to me. They would be sad, wouldn't they?

Deidara.

He would be outraged that I let myself die, that I didn't fight harder. He'd be sad too, sad because I'm gone. Sad because there's no one for him to tease, no one he can protect, no one he can act like a tough guy around, no one for him to joke around with, no one for him to wrestle with, and no one to have fun with.

If I died, they'd all be crushed.

I wasn't going to die, not now. Not while my friends, my family, needed me.

And so I fought. I didn't let the darkness consume me. I didn't let myself go back to my comatose state in the other world; I fought the pull trying to drag me to my world. I fought like I had never fought before.

**3RD PERSON**

They were all worried. Sasori, Kakuzu, and Konan were in the medic area trying to heal Itami who frankly, did not look good. Deidara couldn't get the image of Itami out of his head.

Pale white, like snow. Her eyes almost lifeless as they were closing. The gaping wound in her chest, the other wound reopened. Both pouring blood. Her entire sweatshirt was ruined, ripped in half. The dark green tank she had on under it was no longer green but I dark red-green, more red than anything else though.

Deidara had almost passed out seeing her.

Suddenly the door opened and the three medics came out.

"It's all up to God now." stated Konan. Sasori shook his head. Not even Hidan had a comment of Jashin being the only God.

"No, it's up to Itami. With her special conditions I believe it matters if she fights for her life or not." disagreed Sasori.

"What do you mean, yeah?" questioned Deidara, "Of course she's going to fight for her life, un!"

"Not necessarily," Everyone looked to Itachi as he spoke, "Think about it. If she died, things would be much easier for her. Maybe she wants to die, maybe she isn't fighting."

"No!" yelled Deidara. He glared at everyone.

"She is fighting, un! She is fighting because I know her and I know that even if she wanted to die, she wouldn't! She'd fight just because she's stubborn like that, yeah! She knows that she's loved by all of us, and she wouldn't want to leave such a good thing behind, un!" Deidara's tirade had everyone thinking. Most about how true Deidara's words were, but not Konan. Konan smiled to herself as she thought about her friend, her dying friend, inside.

'Itami, when you get back, I think you and Deidara should have a talk. Because I think you two don't even realize the hidden feelings that you've got for each other.' thought Konan as she turned around to look at Itami through the door. A frown was on her face. And almost magically, at the thought Konan had, Itami's mouth turned upwards into a smile.

Itami never smiled; maybe she had a rare grin or laugh. But she never smiled.

A sign, Konan realized. A sign that Itami was going to live and a sign to Konan that Deidara and Itami were made for each other.

Meanwhile, far away from the Akatsuki….

"What do you mean she didn't die?" demanded a deep, echoing voice. Over in the shadows a woman smiled.

'Good job Itami, I knew that you were going to do it.' she thought as the large shadow turned to another man. His black hair was slicked back with hints of silver and his dark almost black purple eyes were void of emotion. Although his mouth was curved in a smirk showing he was pleased.

"You! It was you wasn't it!" snapped the shadow, its dark crimson eyes glaring at him.

"Hardly, I didn't even give her a push. I had no reason." laughed the man, his voice smooth and slick.

"She's a follower of you apparently." accused the crimson eyed shadow.

"Yes, and I enjoy watching her because she's hilarious but she was able to pull out of it all on her own. Face it Sosu, she's stronger than you thought. You underestimated." laughed the dark haired man.

"My name is Sosūdearukoto." snapped the crimson eyed shadow. The dark haired man rolled his eyes.

"So stiff, why can't you have simple names like Megami?" questioned the man.

"We all have long names, I just allow you to shorten mine." laughed the woman, enjoying the fight between the two.

"Exactly, Shinigami, although you don't even listen to your name." muttered Sosūdearukoto, "You respond to your own made up name."

"Megamiaiseimei, you visited her didn't you!" realized Sosūdearukoto. Megamiaisemei laughed.

"I'm found of her, like Shinigami said, she's amusing." she mumbled.

"She has to die! She is upsetting the balance!" roared Sosūdearukoto.

"Yeah yeah, I heard you. But you," Shinigami looked up with a new smirk plastered to his features as he recalled an event, "allowed an exception to your own follower once. I recall you falling in love with a human!"

Megamiaiseimei laughed once again as the two bickered. The two stopped when she stepped out of the shadows, her angelic wings wrapped around her to keep the cold of the dark castle from her. Her silver-gold hair seemed to shine, much like the rest of her. It was a mystery how she had not been lighting up the shadows.

"Stop bickering like human children, I can guarantee Itami will pass all the tests you give her and that as much as you try to kill her she will keep on surviving! She won't even need help from Shinigami." announced Megamiaiseimei.

"And what will I get if she does die or fail?" asked Sosūdearukoto. Megamiaiseimei and Shinigami shared a look.

"Her soul." they replied instantly and simultaniously.

"Well, God of Death and Goddess of Life, you're willing to give up one of your precious souls?" asked Sosūdearukoto. They nodded, but shared a few sly looks. They knew Itami was strong and they knew that no matter what Sosūdearukoto threw at Itami, she would win.

Itami would live no matter what. She knew it

Megamiaiseimei smiled as she watched the two bicker again. But soon she frowned as she thought of Itami.

Her time was coming short and soon, she would have to choose.

'The 'Narutoverse' or her world? Which will it be?' mused Megamiaiseimei. And with that her thoughts flew to the comatose body in her world. Then to the girl's body in the 'Narutoverse' where she was currently fighting still for her life.

Which will she choose?

* * *

**AN-**

**Does anyone realize how annoying it is to type all those names? And remember spelling? I had to copy and paste Sosūdearukoto every time too! But that's because I couldn't spell it or put the line above the U.**

**I'm going to my cousins wedding over the weekend, i'm excited because that means my family is taking over a wing of the hotel, that means we'll be wreaking havoc. I cannot wait! I love my dads side of the family, they're hilarious.**

**Q-Ok, so who do you think the three people fighting in the end are? And don't put their names -_- Oh! And do you know why I gave them long irritating names? What do their names mean? Why do you think I chose those names for them? And what's your opinion of what's going on with Itami?**

**A-Ok, so it was basically a simple question. Good or bad and what'd you think. I cannot answer the good or bad question and the other was asking for your opinions.**

**Shidonii-Kun: Shadow has boring question's, so I'll ask you this- Did anyone you know, you, your family... Well how did Sandy affect you? And who did you (or would if you're not 18) vote for?**

**OI! My questions are not boring! Min pertain to the story, yours are on voting, which i don't care much about. If i'm asked in school i reply Robama, Romney and Obama mixed together. But i'd prefer Romney really.**

**Audios my lovelies!**


	25. Healing

**AN**

**Fair warning, a long angry author's note that i vented on is at the bottom. Feel free to skip it, its the top two paragraphs. **

**Enjoy**

* * *

"What the hell are you doing, yeah?" wondered Deidara. I hardly looked up at him as I held out my hand towards the large sewed up hole in my chest. I was making sure that I stayed concentrated.

"You look like you're trying to take a shit." commented Hidan as he stuck his head in. I ignored both of them as I narrowed my eyes at the wound.

"Jashin damn it! I've been at this for the past twenty minutes!" I announced bitterly. Hidan and Deidara raised their eyebrows at my frustration. I turned towards them slightly; almost hissing from the strained pain it caused my wound.

"I had an intelligent idea." I stated. Their eyebrows remained raised.

"I figured that if I can control my blood I can possibly heal myself if I can move my blood so while being stuck on bed rest without the ability to sleep at all I have decided to attempt to heal myself, or at least get my blood to move. And since Konan thought I was suicidal the first time she caught me cutting myself to get blood, I'm using my already made wound." I enlightened them. Hidan shrugged and left when I was done explaining my idea. Deidara sat down next to me.

"I'm a chakra control expert like Danna, un. I can help." he decided as he moved his bang to watch me with his scope.

"Ok, so try focusing your chakra." ordered Deidara. I did as told.

"Good, un. Now try and move it to the wound, un." he instructed. I moved it to the wound and suddenly, my stitches ripped and blood began oozing out slowly, however a large mass of it was in the way.

"Ok good, now… I have no idea, yeah." admitted Deidara. I frowned.

"Well shit, now I have a large hole in my chest again. Kakuzu isn't going to be very pleased either." I muttered as I glared at the hole in my chest. Deidara sat next to me and his hand turned a pale green.

"Since when can you heal?" I asked, slightly surprised.

"I use it to heal burns all the time, un. Anyways, I want to test how the blood reacts to my chakra so quiet." ordered Deidara. I shut up as his hand hovered over my wound. The blood bubbled slightly and turned a bit lighter in color but other than that, nothing.

"So is my blood like, poisonous now? Or some kind of super medicine?" I asked. Deidara pulled a vial from the table and used it to take some of the difference colored blood.

"I'm going to give this to Danna, hang tight, un." explained Deidara. I sighed as he left.

"Boredom." I muttered as the door opened about a minute after Deidara had left.

"Tobi!" I grinned at him. He was going to take away my boredom easily! He was quiet as he took a spot sitting next to me on my bed.

"Hey buddy, want to play a game? Deidara left me alone and I'm trying to keep my blood from pouring out of me with my chakra." I explained.

"Itami." I froze at his Madara voice. I felt goose bumps come up along my arms, but I'm hoping he didn't notice. I was going to play dumb.

"Wow Tobi! When'd your voice get so, deep?" I asked with fake curiosity and amazement.

"Drop the act." he ordered. I frowned.

"What act?" I inquired innocently.

"You know what I mean, Itami." he didn't sound amused.

"Damn." I breathed. Obviously hearing me, he turned his head to stare at me with his Sharingan.

"Fine, what do you want?" I asked bitterly. He leaned his face in close.

"I want to know," he breathed, "What you know." I frowned.

"I know who you are, I know who you aren't, I know your plan, I know who you kill to get what, I know what you're doing, I think I've established I know everything." I stated. He chuckled, it sounded evil. Like seriously.

"And my plan, what do you think?" he asked.

"I think I don't like it because it wouldn't affect me." I deadpanned. He nodded.

"A valid reason." he noted.

"Since you are here everything should go according to plan, I will know if you lie and if you do, you will not like what your punishment will be." he threatened, I shivered. The threat was no joke, and I really did not want to find out what the punishment was. Tobi left and I glared at the door, then at the wall, then at the ceiling as I went to lie back against my pillow.

"Damn it, I don't want his plan to work, but I can't lie." I muttered. I sat there for a good ten minutes, then it hit me. I grinned like I was a child that had just conned someone out of a ton of candy.

"I know," I muttered excitedly, "I'll just 'forget' to mention things." I grinned. Yes, that would work beautifully.

Suddenly the door slammed open and a familiar blonde ran in with a vial. He held it up and undid the cork. I stopped him with an icy glare.

"Pour that on my wound and suffer torture for the next few years."I threatened. I did not like the looks of the substance in that vial. It was green, smoking, and frankly, looked like acid. I think it may make me worse.

"It's your blood though, un!" argued Deidara. I stared at it.

"Deidara, get your eyes checked. That's green and doesn't resemble blood in any way, shape, or form." I snapped. Deidara shook his head.

"No, it's your blood. I brought it to Sasori who studied it and mixed some things together and Sasori tested it on my arm, it will heal your wound, yeah!" explained Deidara. I watched him warily as he poured it onto my wound. I hissed.

It burned!

But as soon as it came it was gone, and the wound was slowly stitching itself together. Deidara and I watched, fascinated. Konan came in moments later and stared at Deidara who was still staring at my chest.

"Pervert!" I said nothing in his defense as Konan whacked him on the head a few times. Once I did come to his defense, she still whacked him on the head a few times for good measure. I laughed this time as I stood up feeling wonderful. Of course, Konan gave me a look.

"I want more of your blood, that stuff could help us later on." she ordered. I sighed and allowed her to make a gash and I allowed her to fill a bucket of bubbling blood. A bucket. A large bucket. And it was of my blood! It was also filled to the top! I gave away an entire bucket of blood and felt perfectly fine. What is wrong with me?

"A lot of things, hm." stated Deidara as if knowing what I was thinking.

"Probably." I sighed before perking up a bit, "I want to train!"

"Eh? You? Train?" asked Deidara, I nodded.

"Fine, yeah. I'll help you, un." And with that, our training commenced in the training room.

I will not let myself get hurt again!

* * *

**AN  
This chapter is short because in the original version of the last chapter i had the three people introduced, but i was going to change it to this chapter to lengthen this one. But i forgot and kept the other part in the other one on accident and now, this chapter is short and feels empty...**

**I'm mad at my bestie Lexi, so now my friend Joey is my best friend until Lexi manages to stop irking me. Nah, Joey is too awesome so not be my best friend. Joey actually made the funniest face, he stopped watching Naruto(LE GASP! Although he isn't bad on Naruto Ninja Storm Generations, he almost beat me with Sasuke, I was Kakashi. If i had unlocked the Akatsuki on his console then he'd be dead faster, especially if i used Deidara since all i have to do is continuously hit X) and last year i told him Tobi was Madara Uchiha, and then when i told him that he was Obito his face was like O_O. That was before I decided to be a dumb ass, we were walking up my street to caravel(IN THE SNOW!: D) to get ice cream(IN THE SNOW!: D) and i stopped to kick a can on the floor, I missed the can and almost fell on my ass into the street. Joey just laughed at me.**

**Do you want to know why I'm mad at Lexi? Well she always texts other people when at my house, she always refuses to give in to what I want to do even when I sacrifice what I want to do for her things, then today when my DUMBASS SUB forgot to put in all the grades we got for our studio homework for the last two months we had to give them back, I don't have a folder to keep them in so I don't know where mine are. Lexi handed hers in and I was freaking out since I can get kicked out of the class for poor grades. I asked her what to do and her reaction "I don't know...hey guess what blah blah blah blah" And I was pissed! I mean I help her do all the homework and I ask her what to do and she just goes right off into another topic! Whenever she asks me for help even if I have no idea I try to help without knowing anything! So as we were walking and she was talking about her hair cut i said "I don't care about your hair cut! You're such a shitty friend." and then I stomped away after she complained that she didn't know what to do. She never does! On our trip she also said to me "I don't want to dance with you because I want to dance with someone who I know can actually dance, no offense" Then she always defends her twin, who is a bitch to her, when her twin insulted my acne(Which she has worse on, mines going away, finally) and my temper(I'm being insulted and just sarcastically responding in my mind bitch, you're turning red in the face while screaming at me, I'm standing here calmly) she still defended her twin by saying "Well she hasn't really talked to you in awhile..." Awhile my ass, I'm insulted and you just defend her! I didn't even insult back even though I'd have loved to! If she reads this, which I doubt since even though I read her stories she doesn't read mine, then I hope she realizes that I still haven't forgiven another one of our friends for pranking me last year, which Lexi was a part of, and I am not forgiving her any time soon! I am not a forgiving person when I'm pissed!**

**Angry rant, done.**

**Q-What is your favorite song? Favorite artist?**

**Shidonii-Kun: Well shit, I'm sorry to hear that. Me and Rachel get along too well to fight, we never have. (Though I've only known her since sixth grade...) But, my favorite song up-yo-date would have to be Chalk Outline by Three Days Grace, and my favorite band... Three Days Grace!**

**A-Well I can't give it all away because that would give away some of the story but I will tell you that Megami and Sosu are OCs, and Shinigami is translated to Death God, I got it from Google translate actually... I got all the names from Google translate... Magamiaiseimei should translate to Megami-Goddess Ai-Love and Seimei-Life, I think. Sosu, is two words put together that i shall not reveal(No... I didn't forget their meanings... stop staring at me like you don't believe me!) And I made sure they had long names to show that they're different from all the ninja, and I also made sure to show that Shinigami and Megami are more lenient with their names than Sosu, going as far as for Sosu to insult Shinigami (He did, it just may not have seemed like it) I'm actually just going to tell you Shinigami is jashin since someone did guess it.**

**Oh! Before I forget, fan art. I would love it if someone drew me a picture, maybe of Itami and Deidara or something. I can't draw them standing next to each other even though I'm artistically talented. I did draw a picture of Itami, it's the new Insomnia pic, and its on my deviant art account! If you still don't know, my deviant art is ShadowBloodNinja, it is the same as my pen name and there is a link on the top of my profile. I do not think anyone will draw me anything though because my story is not all hat great, i'm just trying to find a way to get a better story pic...**

**If you want to hear about my cousins wedding...well you get to hear about it next chapter, this one is long and angry.**

\


	26. Lost

**AN-**

**Welcome to the Lost Arc! **

**Enjoy this un-betaed chapter, if it sucks, blame me for being lazy.**

* * *

"You asshole!" It was always nice to hear yelling in the morning. I stood up, yawned a bit, and walked out into the hallway to see Deidara and Hidan bickering, Hidan screaming profanities at Deidara and Deidara holding a bomb in his hand ready to throw it at Hidan.

"Freeze shitheads!" I barked, they both looked at me.

"If you get this hallway dirty I'm kicking both your asses with my new trick." I snapped. Hidan raised an eyebrow, Deidara nodded. He saw what I was learning to do so yeah, he knew not to get me mad at him.

"And what is it you can do?" asked Hidan with a smirk. I pulled the bandage off the wounds on my arm and Hidan watched it carefully. The blood oozed lout before levitating off of my arm.

"Flying blood?" snorted Hidan. I concentrated and formed the blood into a needle before I aimed it.

"Fuck!" screeched Hidan as the needle flew into his eye. Deidara laughed and I smirked. I could now make weapons with my blood, how do you like me now? I have Ninjutsu! Well... i could make a needle with my blood, that was about it...

"Good job Itami, yeah. We can work on using more blood to make a kunai or shuriken today, un." offered Deidara. I nodded and we left for the training area, leaving a swearing Hidan on the floor. However our training didn't get very far because Leader summoned us. We walked to his office and found Konan going through the box that had cloaks in it.

"You two are going on a mission." I automatically searched the room for Sasori, not finding said red headed puppet I realized that he meant me. Deidara also came to the same conclusion at the same time.

"What, (un)?" Deidara and I asked simultaneously.

"Itami needs training, and she needs to get out of the base and observe the surroundings since she can no longer go between worlds, you two get along so I am sending you two. Deidara will handle the mission scroll and complete the mission with your help, Itami." explained Leader, handing Deidara the scroll. He opened it and I stared at it blankly from over his shoulder. To me it looked like random lines that meant nothing, to Deidara it was words.

"Ok so we have to go to the mountains and get some supplies, yeah?" asked Deidara receiving a nod. He rolled the scroll up and pocketed it before turning to me.

"Alright, we're moving out in ten minutes Itami, un." ordered Deidara. I nodded and went to my room. I grabbed my IPod; I left my phone with Konan just in case we got into trouble. Did you know that I can charge my things here? They have outlets, and my things fit in the outlets. I never knew that before now.

We set out on one of Deidara's birds, he had explained we were going somewhere off the map. I nodded, satisfied that I was being told where we were going.

The flight was boring. I had no interest in the trees below me nor did I find anything of the trees to be interesting. Trees are trees and there was nothing interesting about them.

I was bored, and I was praying for something interesting to happen before I died from my boredom.

"Shit, un!" A large shuriken just missed our bird and Deidara moved to get us to fly higher. However a few Konoha ninja, Kakashi, Sakura, Shikamaru, and Ino to be exact were able to hijack our bird.

"Hey, Itami is fine!" called Ino, noticing me. I pulled my sword from its place on my hip. Funny story about it actually. After Kisame beat the shit out of me he allowed me to practice with a real sword and I actually stood a chance against him! Sword against log, however he was still able to annihilate me, and humiliate me in front of Sasori and Kakuzu who had been watching me get the shit beat out of me. But Kisame was impressed by my sword skills so he allowed me to carry the sword around. I think he may also have let me do it so I stand a chance against being kidnapped again.

Can't touch me now fuckers! Ha!

Anyways, back to our fight.

So Deidara immediately pushed me off the bird, trusting that I was smart enough to pull a clay bird from my pouch. Of course if I didn't have any left it would have been pretty bad… but I still had one left so I pulled it out and allowed myself to fall onto it. I flew back up, but stayed far enough away to keep away from the fight. Deidara launched himself towards me and clung to the side of my bird as he exploded his bird.

Moments later however, the Konoha ninja, all of them alive and only slightly singed, were upon us. I started taking off; we weren't ready for a big fight like that. Deidara had to restock on clay so he didn't bring a ton and it wouldn't be good if we ran out since his Taijutsu, although not bad, would do shit against Sakura's punches and Kakashi's Sharingan.

"Try and knock any kunai away with your sword, un." ordered Deidara as he stole the control of the bird form me. He was the original creator so he could do it if he was on the bird. I nodded and pulled my sword out, ready for any kunai or shuriken to come at me. A shuriken did come; it was a big one that could cut me in half. I ducked after yelling a warning to Deidara who also ducked.

"Damn it, yeah!" snapped Deidara as Kakashi made it onto our bird. I took my sword and swung at him. He ducked so I kicked at him. He caught my foot, but I used another trick of mine that I had developed. Kakashi was pushed up as all the chakra and blood I could move was pushed to my foot as I kicked my foot out. The momentum however made me fall forwards too. I stabbed my sword into the bird, but it didn't matter. I was already falling.

"Deidara!" I screeched reaching out for him. He reached down and our hands grabbed each other. I squeezed his wrist with an iron grip as he pulled me up while also flying the bird. Of course when the large shuriken shaved the wing right off the bird, we both knew we were in trouble. We could slowly fall to the ground, however we were also going through mountains at the moment so we would probably crash and explode. Deidara pulled me to him after I put away my sword. He pulled his cloak around me as he jumped off the bird. I heard a slight explosion as we fell. We hit the ground getting Deidara to grunt and we began rolling. We were on a mountain, like I said. It didn't hurt me as much as Deidara probably felt because he had his body protecting me and his arms making sure I didn't fall out of his cloak. I felt like a child really.

When we finally stopped, both of us were dizzy. Seriously, the word was spinning! We had to have been rolling for like five minutes, and we would bounce from rocks and stuff. Deidara groaned as he stayed on his back on the cold hard earth. I crawled from his cloak and observed our surroundings.

"Fuck, I have no idea where we are." I stated before I looked at Deidara. I pulled him up and pulled his cloak down so I could check out his back.

Ouch.

Through the fishnet shirt I could see that his back was cut up and bruised. If even a feather brushed past his back it would hurt like hell for him. I pulled his cloak back up and rubbed my bandaged arms. I was wearing a dark purple dank top and black ninja pants with my black combat boots. I was cold though and that was when I noticed the dark clouds.

"Crap." Unlike what I had been expecting, it began snowing. The good thing was it meant I could find someplace for us to hide without us getting soaked, however that meant it was below freezing. I liked cold though, so it wasn't bad for me. Yet. If you gave me awhile I would probably turn blue and get hypothermia, I loved the cold. However I turned blue fast, my doctors said it was because I had something weird with my skin. My skin was like, undeveloped or something, it was different from being an albino though. My skin didn't tan but it held heat in very easily, making me like the cold since I got hot very fast. However my skin lost heat very fast in the cold and because it was thinner than most skin, I got cold fast. I liked the cold because I usually wore my sweatshirt and pants so I managed to keep the heat in my clothes when I lost it after sitting there for awhile. But still, whatever was wrong with me was annoying. They didn't really know what it was; it didn't even have a name. My doctor called it Itami Syndrome. I didn't find it funny.

"Deidara, are you asleep?" I asked incredulously as I noticed that Deidara wasn't moving. He was asleep. I sighed; if he rested his chakra would replenish faster, right? So I left him asleep as I dragged him through the woods looking for a cave or overhang. Or if we were lucky:

A cabin.

However luck seems to be against us so I dragged Deidara with me until I located a medium sized hole in the ground. I pulled Deidara in and laid him against the rocky wall as I returned out into the cold. I glared at snow as it landed on my already blue tinted skin. I would have to find what I was looking for fast or else I'd become an Itami Popsicle.

I trudged around until I found the things I was looking for. I returned to our little cave and set the sticks down in a pile with some dry grass I had picked up. I also grabbed two rocks.

"Ok, how do I do this?" even though it was warm from body heat in the cave I was still cold because body heat alone wouldn't warm me up. I started by trying to make fire by rubbing sticks together. No luck. I tried using the rocks like flint, no luck. I growled and poked Deidara with a stick. Having no luck waking him, I got an idea. I took a clay spider from my bag and placed it outside the cave. I placed a stick there and had the spider blow up by the stick, hoping it would make the stick catch fire. It was stupid idea that shouldn't work.

It worked.

"Fire!" I squealed as I came back into the cave and set the burning stick in the pile and sat next to it. Luckily the way the cave was set up, you had to go down a smallish incline to get to the actual cave, so the smoke could go up and exit the cave by the entrance. Now we had a perfect little cave. I laid down next to the fire and was close enough so that I could feel my body getting warm, but not catch fire. That was the last thing I needed.

It took awhile for Deidara to wake up. When he did he found that I had moved things around so he was using his cloak as a pillow and he was lying on his stomach so his wounds wouldn't touch the ground.

"Itami? Where are we, un?" asked Deidara.

"We fell off the bird, remember? And you fell asleep, so I managed to drag you here and then I made a fire and waited for you to wake up." I explained. Deidara nodded and sat up, wincing when he moved his back too much.

"You didn't have to shield me when we were falling, now look at your back." I scolded.

"Hey, un. Don't lecture me, yeah." muttered Deidara. I frowned.

"I will lecture you if I want to." I stated as I turned to the fire. I had just gotten back inside after going out to look for anything that would tell us where we were or food, or a cabin. That still is not going to be likely to happen though.

"Why is your skin blue, un?" asked Deidara as he put his hand on my back, right at the end of the tank top.

"I have some kind of condition that makes my skin thinner than usual, it doesn't hold heat well in the cold but if I'm in the heat it's like I'm a moving fire pit. I just got back in so my skins blue." I explained. Deidara put his other hand on my back an I have to admit, it felt good. Thw warmth his hands made had my back feel great! Of course when his tongues freaking licked my back I flinched and turned around to yell but stopped and just went back to sitting by the fire, once again as close as possible.

"So we're lost?" asked Deidara, moments later after he put his cloak around me. I nodded.

We were lost.

* * *

**AN**

**I have no idea if Itami's disease if real, I have no idea if anything like that can happen. I just needed a reason for her to be blue and cold, but then I remembered that she liked the cold and was like, alright time for a possibly non-existent problem. This is proof i don't plan the little details.**

**Ok, so here's a little note. I am doing arcs, I never mentioned this before but here's how the arcs goes.**

**Chapters:**

**1-4 Introduction Arc  
5-8 Theories Arc  
9+10 One Tail Arc  
11-14 Filler Arc  
15+16 First Kiss Arc  
17-19 Orochimaru Arc  
20-24 Hidan and Kakuzu Arc. **

**Now is the beginning of the Lost Arc**

**The Halloween chapter is an exception, but I'd throw it in the Hidan and Kakuzu arc just because I don't feel like messing up the chapters. Just remember it takes place before the Hidan and Kakuzu arc but after the Orochimaru Arc. Actually, maybe I should move the chapters… around… If I move the Halloween chapter to 20, then don't blame me. I might not though.**

**Anyways, expect all the arcs to be somewhere around three chapters because I try to make at least 1800 words per chapter so the arcs go fast.**

**Q-Hm, how about have you ever gotten lost? Like seriously lost like, "Oh my Jashin I'm stuck in the woods! Imma die!" or not so lost like, "Crap, where the hell did my friends go? This is why I hate shopping." or my favorite kind of lost, "My cars out of gas, and I have no idea where I am. And my phone is out of charge. Shit." Lol, I actually love all the scenarios. **

**A-I cannot tell you the answers because they are SPOILERS!**

** FOr those of you that are curious, i'm still pissed off at Lexi.**

** I'm trying to get Joey, my friend, to let me into his group of friends. They're all at least a year older than me but they're funner than my friends, and they're on par with my intelligence. And i don't feel so socially retarded around them. And they're strong enough to give me piggy back rides! Lol, i'm a slave river.**


	27. Seperated

**AN-**

**Enjoy**

* * *

I personally was extraordinarily cold. No wait, I was more than that, I was freezing! I had made Deidara take back his cloak because he had started turning blue after awhile, and he didn't have a skin condition that turned you blue when you were cold like me.

"Hey Itami, you're blue again, un." pointed out Deidara. I gave him a look that pointedly stated what I would say.

"No, really? I didn't notice." I hissed. He sighed as we trekked through the snow; it had come up to our knees now. That was saying something too; we had been waddling through the snow for a good two hours trying to get down the mountain and my legs were probably going to bitch at me later, oh and I was probably losing a good amount of my toes.

"Look! Smoke! And I think I see the top of a church, un!" called Deidara. True to his words there was smoke drifting up through the trees. We shared a look and took off towards it.

Warmth! I may be able to save my toes!

Suddenly however that was not my main concern.

"Itami!" I heard Deidara yell. I screeched as the ground disappeared beneath me and I almost ran off the side of a canyon. Deidara pulled me back and we looked down.

Well, if we fall the good news is I _think_ I see a river down there. It looked small though compared to the height we were at…

"We can make it, un." decided Deidara looking at the other side of the canyon.

"Lies, you can make it, I can't." I stated, it was true. Deidara using chakra could fly across the canyon and probably make it, me however. I'd probably fall and die of fright before reaching the river. Or maybe the cold would kill me first as I was falling.

"We need to get to the village because if it continues snowing at this rate we'll die, or become ice pops, yeah." snapped Deidara.

"Then go without me and then get someone to come back and help, you can't jump across with me anyway. Your back looks like hell." Deidara looked at me like I had three heads.

"Itami, you can make the jump, un. You can use your chakra, remember? We practiced yeah." argued Deidara.

"Fine, you go first." I stated. With that, Deidara flew across the ledge and landed, almost toppling backwards. He threw himself forward and threw me a thumbs up. I sighed, Deidara, an S Rank ninja who has been doing this his entire nineteen years of living, almost didn't make the jump. Basically,

I knew I was going to fall.

But Deidara wouldn't go to the town unless I tried so I took a few steps back and made my chakra go to my feet. I couldn't really feel it though in the cold. I took off running towards the edge. In my head all I could think was 'I'm going to die!' going over and over again like a mantra. When I threw myself off the edge of the cliff, I knew I wasn't going to make it. So did Deidara. He reached out to try and grab me, as if I would make it close.

"Itami!" yelled Deidara as our fingers briefly touched as I began to fall.

I knew I was going to fall.

I fell quickly and soon Deidara became a dot. It was a long fall and I didn't want to turn around and see when I was going to die. However when I hit water, it came as a surprise. As it turns out, the river was much larger then expected. The cold water overpowered my frozen limbs and my eyes closed, probably frozen shut. I allowed myself to be carried away by the current, after all.

I was probably going to die.

**3RD PERSON**

Deidara had watched her fall. He had watched her until she had become merely a dot falling down the tall valley. He stood after a few moments.

"Wait a minute, un…" mumbled Deidara, looking back. His eyes calculated where she would fall using his scope. That's when he realized.

She was going to fall in the river.

Using his chakra he flew towards the village, he had to get help first. Then worry about Itami. He'd be useless without more people. He ran into town and looked around for help. He managed to get a few people and the towns healer to come with him (After Deidara thanked all the God's he knew for no one in the town knowing he was an Akatsuki member). They trekked down to the river and began to search. However they didn't know how far she had been swept away.

They also didn't know that someone else had already found her.

**1****st**** Person Itami **

I blinked and almost moaned from the comfort the warmth was giving me. I felt like a big relief had been pulled off my limbs.

"Are you awake?" ...

FUCK!

I moved my head so I could see the person who spoke. Jade eyes watched me move. One name came to mind.

Sakura.

I moved to look for the rest of the team. No one?

"If you're looking for everyone else we were split up in the storm after you and the Akatsuki fell. What happened to you anyway?" asked Sakura. I sat up and scooted closer to the fire. Sakura had found a lovely cave similar to the one I had found.

My mind began whirling. I started coming up with as many plans as I possibly could. I had to find one that could get me away from Sakura and back to Deidara. However, I was not having an easy time. I could come up with a few ideas, but not many. Finally, I came up with a small idea.

Be friendly.

If I'm friendly Sakura won't suspect much and she won't try and kill me, and I can just play myself off as an innocent person! Of course I'm still an Akatsuki, but i'm going to have to act dumb. And i'm going to have to act outside of my personality here...

"I have a condition." I stated, Sakura looked up at me, most likely surprised i was going to answer her question.

"My skin isn't very thick so I lose heat fast in the cold, but I get hot really easy. Deidara and I, when our bird crashed Deidara was hurt protecting me from the impact…" I trailed off as I looked to see Sakura had taken away my sword.

"Then once he woke up, we came to a canyon. Deidara could make it across because he's been using chakra his entire life, and he wasn't a human popsicle. But when I tried to make the jump, the cold numbed my sense of my body and I couldn't properly focus my chakra, I fell into the canyon and miraculously landed in a river." I explained. Sakura nodded and I sighed.

"Can you really tell the future?" she questioned. I snorted.

"I can, I also know about you and your friends. Call it a bloodline limit I have, if you will. It's rare though." I was bluffing, but I couldn't say how I knew about everything.

"Really?" asked Sakura.

"Yeah, your name is Sakura Haruno; you were originally on Team seven with Sasuke Uchiha, and Naruto Uzumaki with Kakashi Hatake as your Jounin. Your first C Rank mission you fought Zabuza Momochi and Haku, an ice release user. You were guarding a bridge builder named Tazuna who at first insulted Naruto by calling him short and unintelligent looking." Sakura looked amazed and I leaned closer to the fire. I was still wet from the river.

"Wow, you're good. Tsunade-shishou will be happy when we bring you back." I froze.

"Bring me back?" I questioned.

"You hold a lot of information, we can't let you stay with the Akatsuki." explained Sakura. I frowned.

"I am not coming back to Konoha with you." I stated. Sakura obviously disagreed.

"I can't, the Akatsuki know of my problems and frankly, I like it with them." I admitted. Sakura listened to what I was saying carefully.

"I like how Konan and I are the only girls so we immediately own everyone's asses, I like how I can throw things and impale Hidan and he won't die, I love how I can wrestle with Deidara and only get yelled at by Kakuzu, I love how I can get my way if I bribe Kakuzu, I like how I can be myself without being criticized, I like it there. If we switched places, then you would see why I like it. It's really points of perspective." I explained.

"How is it points of perspective?" asked Sakura. We were really getting into our debate now.

"Well, both sides want peace, you guys want to end the Akatsuki because they're taking the Tailed Beasts, the Akatsuki want to use the power to bring peace." I explained.

"The Akatsuki don't want peace." Sakura frowned. I snorted.

"Here's how I see it as an innocent bystander, you guys of the Shinobi nations proclaim yourselves as the good guys. You immediately find someone doing things their own way and you proclaim them the bad guys. Your solution?" I made a face and threw my voice in a funny way, "Must kill."

Sakura laughed and I snorted. I looked out of the cave and found the snow had gotten much higher.

"The Akatsuki kill people every day though." she argued.

"You have no sound argument." I snapped, turning around.

"I can turn everything you say around back at you, the Akatsuki kill every day, that is true. But what about the Jounin and ANBU you have? Hell even some Chunin. They kill every day, why do they kill people and not get in trouble however when the Akatsuki do it it's not right?" I asked.

"It's for justice!" exclaimed Sakura.

"Incorrect. Everyone has their own sense of justice; there is no true sense of justice. There are obvious wrongs like killing for no reason, and things like rape and stuff. But then there are things like, like say someone pays someone to kill someone. How do you know that person isn't doing it for something bigger? Or forget the money, what if they're being forced to do it or, no even better. Why not use Zabuza and Haku as an example?" Sakura was leaning close to me, we looked like we were gossiping from the way we were sitting.

"I'm going to use Haku first, Haku died. Killed by Kakashi for his purpose by using himself as a shield against Kakashi's Chidori, however if he hadn't of done that, Kakashi would have killed him anyway. As he would with Zabuza. Now Haku, his belief was he was Zabuza's tool. He didn't want to kill but he was necessarily being made to do it, and he was killed for it. Did he deserve it? From your point of view, yes. But really, I don't think he did. But what do I know? I'm just a sarcastic bitch." Sakura pondered this for awhile.

"Zabuza deserved it." she finally decided. I shrugged.

"Hey, I'm just saying, next time you're about to kill someone, think about it. Point of view, your point of view is they have to die, someone else's point of view, they don't. Who is right? I don't think there really is a right; I think one day the world is just going to explode because everyone on this planet is a moron." I stated. Sakura laughed and I smirked.

"Nah, I'm shitting you, I don't think the worlds going to explode just because everyone is a moron. But seriously, think about it. When you're about to stab someone, or poison them, or strangle them, or punch them with a fist that could shatter everyone bone in their body easily, think about it. Is it really right? Do you really have the right to play God and take someone's life early?" Sakura thought about it and I stood up and stretched.

I'm playing God, aren't I? I'm messing up an entire world; people who are supposed to be dead are alive because of me and just me being here is messing something up.

I am playing God.

I smirked as I leaned back against the cave wall, Sakura was leaning against it opposite me, she was pondering my words.

"Itami," I looked at Sakura, "Why do you want to go back to the blonde Akatsuki member?"

"Well, I guess of all the members Deidara is my best friend. I'm probably closest to him since we're always near each other, he's teaching me about chakra, when I had a hole in my chest he's the one who called out my name and sat there, he's the one who wrestles with me and the one who protects me. I'd probably be dead without him." I admitted.

"Sounds like he's more than a friend." teased Sakura.

"Oi! You're stealing Konan's favorite thing to do! It's her job to imply that Deidara and I like each other!" I snorted after a second. Moments later, something hit me.

"Hey Sakura, how come you're treating me civilly? I thought I was an Akatsuki, to be killed on sight." Sakura laughed.

"No you're not an Akatsuki or to be killed on sight, we know you're not very strong-" I interupted her.

"Thanks, I love to know that being tortured by a snake pedo and living, being almost murdered twice, and training my ass off makes me weak." Sakura laughed but went back to what she was saying.

"-and so all I did was take away your sword so you wouldn't attack me when you woke up. Besides your information is wanted and highly dangerous so you're probably actually really wanted. I bet if you checked a bingo book you'd be in there." I nodded.

"I feel epic now; I mean I'm in a bingo book! And I didn't even have to do much to get in there!" I used my hands at this point to count what I did, "I mean all I did was wake up one day after an accident, meet the Akatsuki, tell the future, mess up the real future, fuck around, almost get killed three times, get tortured once, train my ass off…where was I?" Sakura laughed again. She laughed really easy; I wasn't trying to be funny. I was being serious.

"But anyway, I know I'm not strong but I feel awesome because I'm in a bingo book. I wonder if the picture of me looks good, how the hell did they even get a picture of me? I've been kept inside since everyone's afraid that I'm going to get injured or kidnapped again, I am apparently a danger magnet." Sakura laughed.

"Hell if I know." she laughed. I shrugged and leaned back. I closed my eyes, trying to feign sleep. But really, I was trying to think.

Ok, so I'm separated from Deidara and Sakura is separated from her group, we're together. If I try and run, she can catch me. If I try and run while she's asleep, I may freeze to death. It's still snowing. Now how can I get back to Deidara?

After pondering for the rest of the night I looked out and found the snow was still piling up, it would probably reach my mid thigh by now, possibly higher. I didn't think snow could pile that high. I sighed then, so now I had two problems. I had no idea how to get back to Deidara, and the snow was high and I would get hypothermia should I go out for too long. The only goo thing was Sakura was letting her guard down around me, i could surprise her but... it'd be pointless. Its obvious that I was screwed.

No.

I was SO screwed.

* * *

**AN**

**I'm not very happy with this chapter, nor am I happy with the next one yet. I****'ve already startedon the next chapter, it hates me! i can't get it right.**

** I'm home sick from school today. I've been getting shitty stomach aches for the past like two weeks and today i got one during gym(And i went to the nurse yesterday during 7th period, so lunch/rec) during 2nd period so i went to the nurse and she's like "All right, i'll send you home since you don't look like yourself today and there is a few bugs going around." so i was like :D I am actually glad that she thinks its a stomach bug, i was at first afraid i had contracted some horrible disease or other various problemns my pessimistic nature came up with (Worms! Can humans get worms? I know dogs can... pessimism ick) So here i am, feeling sick, and wanting some soup or something. And its supposed to be snowing but its not, its raining. I am not happy about that.**

**I'm trying to start a new anime, what do you suggest? I was thinking of watching Ouran Highschool Host Club, that looked amusing. Or maybe Fairytale, that was recommended. I've already watched like 50 episodes of InuYasha, and 10 of Angel Beats. Dunno what else, your suggestions?**

** Movie you have to watch is Princess Mononoke. It was the best movie i had ever seen and it is now my all time favorite! With Spirited Away right behind it, both by Studio Ghibli and Miyazaki, you must see it. I demand you see it, look online, subbed or dubbed. **

**Q- Hm... what is your opinion on Itami? Is she a Mary-Sue? Is she a bitch? Is she a dumbass? What do you think?**

**A-Hm, i've gotten lost in various places, like around my block, at an amusement park, the mall, i usually have a good sense of direction, however i need to know the area.**


	28. Still Can't Catch a Break

**AN**

**Enjoy**

* * *

I scowled at the pinkette who had geared up and was ready to venture out into the snow that was past mid thigh for me, I was taller than Sakura too so it was pretty much waist length for her, possibly higher.

"Itami we can't stay in here forever!" muttered Sakura. I poked my head out of the warm cave and looked around. My eyes hurt from it; all I saw was pure white. It was a great contrast to the dark cave I had been in for the past day.

"I will die if I'm out there for any more than fifteen minutes!" I cried, the temperature had probably been way below zero for a few hours. It was probably noon, but that didn't help much other than making it light out, the clouds still covered the sun as it snowed. Yes it was still snowing.

"When we find my comrades we'll get you something warmer to wear." stated Sakura as she grabbed my arm and pulled me out. I lied; the snow was already up to my waist. Sakura used chakra to get herself on top of the snow, then she helped me up and I unsteadily used my chakra, I fell through every few minutes.

We reached the fifteen minute mark; I was past my usual blue. My lips were blue but my skin was almost purple. I was probably going to lose my toes.

Who am I kidding?

I was going to lose my entire leg! Sakura had stopped to briefly try and teach me how to circulate my chakra to keep myself warm, I had failed at it. We had continued on and then, we found it.

"A town!" cried Sakura, rushing forwards. My frozen limbs when being forced to run carried me slower than Sakura but when the villagers saw us they immediately came out and helped us. I was put near a fire, then Sakura spent some time trying to heal me a bit since my skin was all cracked from the cold. The fire didn't help much, so we came up with a new idea.

When the town leader came in I immediately covered myself up. Seeing as how I was frozen they had put me in hot water, so I took off my clothes to let them dry (Snow is water, I think you can understand the rest). I didn't mind the women seeing me, but this guy? I almost threw a knife at him; however I wasn't very fast so Sakura had stopped me.

"So what are your names?" he asked.

"I'm Sakura, and this is Itami." I scowled.

"We aren't traveling together, she just found me when I was half-dead." I stated instantly to avoid sounding like we were traveling together. The man raised an eyebrow.

"I see. You weren't by any chance traveling with a blonde man were you?" he inquired. I almost jumped up; I didn't because I remembered I was naked.

"Deidara? Is he here!" I demanded. The man laughed.

"He's staying at the local inn until the snowstorm passes, he said he lost his comrade when she didn't make the jump over the canyon." explained the man.

"That's him, I need to see him!" I yelled.

"No! You are not going back to the Akatsuki with him, you're coming with me to Konoha!" argued Sakura. An excellent lie came to my mind almost immediately, thank you cunning mind! I turned to the mayor.

"Bring him to me; I need him because he has my jacket that has my medicine." I lied. The pinkette faltered at hearing this.

"I'll bring him right away." promised the mayor as he left.

"You need medicine?" asked Sakura. I nodded.

"It's very rare, and for my skin condition, it's with Deidara." I explained, still lying. Ten minutes passed and the door opened.

"Itami, un!" Deidara flew in wildly.

"Come any closer and you'll suffer!" I threatened, he froze seeing me.

"Y-you're n-n-n-naked, yeah!" he sputtered, red in the face. I waved it off.

"Whatever, we have a situation." I jerked my thumb towards Sakura. They stared at each other before Deidara reached into his clay bag (Even though he barely had any clay left…) and Sakura pulled out a kunai.

"No fighting!" I snapped as I pulled a towel over me and stood up, using it so that Deidara wouldn't see me naked. I stepped out and walked over to Deidara.

"Give me my scroll." I ordered. Deidara pulled out my scroll and opened it, showing the things I had thrown in there. My IPod and a few extra clothes.

"Shoo." Deidara left the room with Sakura after I forced them to agree to not fight and I pulled on black Shinobi pants, new bandages for my arms, a tank top, and a tunic that I had gotten while here. I was warm again. As I was about to leave the room after redoing the scroll with my wet clothes and IPod, I heard voices outside my door.

"They're ninja, what should we do?" asked a male voice, obviously the dark haired mayor.

"Kill the pink haired girl and the man, the black haired one seems to have something special that both of them want. I believe she was in the bingo book." I heard another male voice order; however this one was smoother and silkier than the mayors.

Not good. Not good at all.

"Understood." replied the mayor and footsteps faded away from the door. However another pair came closer. I quickly ran over to the window and pulled it open. If that guy was coming then he'd probably kidnap me, I had to escape.

"Hah!" I whispered in success as I threw one leg out the window. The other followed and after I grabbed my scroll I slid out. Just as I fell into the snow, I heard the door inside open. I quickly waded through the snow to the Inn's door so I could get Sakura and Deidara.

"Fuck my life." I snapped upon coming to the door, it was locked. I was locked out. I waddled over to a window and peered inside, Deidara and Sakura were right there, arguing with each other. I rapped on the window, but it was no use. They couldn't hear me. I walked around back and tried to get the back door open, however I had no luck with that.

"Damn it all!" I muttered as I turned around.

FUCK ME!

"Found you." This man was not one I knew. He had slicked back light blue hair in a similar style to Hidan's hair, only his was a bit longer. Then his eyes were piercing silver that had a small pupil, I was reminded of the Byakugan when I saw them. However they had a pupil, so he couldn't be a Hyuga. He was dressed like it was summer, a white short sleeved shirt with a metal chest protector and dark blue Shinobi pants with ninja sandals. All in all, he was most likely a ninja.

Why does life hate me? What did I ever do wrong?

"I think you have the wrong person…" I trailed, trying to pass myself off as a random passerby. Although it was a long shot, it could work if he were an idiot.

Sadly he was not an idiot.

"I'm afraid that you have to come with me." he gave me a sick grin. I took a step back and found myself against the wall.

Ok, time to access the situation.

I don't have my sword, Sakura has it. I have no kunai, no extra clay Deidara gave me, and basically no ninja tools. I do have a switchblade, but this guy has a sword on his back. Switchblade against sword, sword obviously wins unless I'm extraordinarily lucky. Which I think has been proven that I'm not. Now I think it would be nice to know if this guy can use Ninjutsu, fire is probably painful, although I'd like some warmth being barbequed is not on my list of things. And he could have some dangerous Kekkei-Genkai, or something worse than that. Either way, I'm doomed unless his swordsmanship sucks ass.

I slowly took out my switchblade and prepared to fight. I had to at least try and fight my way out of this. Seeing my blade the man grinned another sick grin. He pulled his sword out and I made a determined face.

"Let's dance." he chuckled as he ran forward. I waited for him to come to me and then, I hit the deck. He swung down and I rolled to the side, narrowly avoiding a sword in my side. I jumped up and tried my best to tackle him but he used chakra to move. I fell forwards and then, seeing an opening, I ran for my life.

That worked SO well.

Moments later I was pulled back by my hair and a sword was placed at my throat. I sighed inwardly; I only had one option left. I took a deep breath and then….

"DEIDARAAAAAAAAAA!" I screamed as loudly and shrilly as possible. My voice cracked and I'm pretty sure I heard a window shatter somewhere. Now I just had to hope Deidara heard me.

**3RD PERSON, A FEW MINUTES BEFORE**

Deidara and Sakura glared at each other with hatred evident in both their stares. Neither was willing to back down.

"Itami is coming back with me, un." stated Deidara, trying to stay civil. He knew that if they fought he would be at a severe disadvantage, he was a long range specialist, she was a short range. He didn't have enough clay for a good fight either.

"She's coming back with me!" argued Sakura, fir ein her eyes. However unknown to Deidara, Sakura didn't want to fight either. She didn't want to harm the villagers. And she was a bit low on chakra too, she had used a lot to heal Itami and to keep on top of the snow on their long trek to the town.

Neither were planning to fight at all really, argue yes. Fight? No way. That is until this happened.

"DEIDARAAAAAAAAAAA!" Both grabbed their ears and it took them both a minute to realize what was going on. Then Deidara bolted out the door, Sakura following behind. They ran around the building until they came to a halt at a horrible scene.

Blood stained the snow.

* * *

**AN**

**I think the sentence 'Blood stained the snow' sounds epic, dunno why. Also, does that count as a cliff-hanger? I think it does...**

**Tell me what you think will happen.**

**Anyways I wasn't originally going to update today, but I did.**

**So i think i'm still getting stomach aches. Here are my reasonings for this A-It is that time of month, B-I have something wrong with me, C-I'm still sick, or D-My body just hates me. I don't know which one it is. Anyone have any stomach ache remedies?**

** Anyways, yesterday I had a Christmas parade with the firehouses. I rode on the brush truck which was full of decorations. When i was in the front on the way to the parade with my dad driving i was slightly scared that i was going to fall out because the door was weird and there was no seatbelt. My dads words of reassure was him sticking his hand out the window and patting the bars, then saying "See these bars? They're crash bars, we could go through a building so don't worry about crashing." My worries? SLightly intensified until a few moments later. Then? They were gone. I had fun and kept yelling "FASTER!" whilst pushing the horn and hitting the alarm thingy. On our way back in the truck passing cars gave us WTF looks because we had our lights on, and we had a few children hitching a ride on the back of the truck with us and they were singing Christmas songs. I had fun.**

**Q-Hm... What do you want for Christmas, or Hanukkuh, or Kwanza, or whatever other holidays there are this month that has present giving.**

**A-Itami constantly gets hurt so i think she's one of those main characters that something always happens to and it usually annoys me, but Itami is my character and i think she's perfect!... nah thats a lie, she's so not perfect. But thats my idea on Itami.**


	29. Finally Catching a Break

**AN**

**Enjoy.**

**Ah yes, I forgot something the last, what 29 chapters? Yeah, I think 29… anyway; I forgot to mention I do not own Naruto all the other 20-something chapters. Although this is a fanfiction website, hence the FAN in fanfiction…**

**It starts off in Third Person by the way.**

* * *

Things Deidara hated-

1-Itachi

2-The Sharingan

3-Being told art isn't a bang

4-Itami getting captured

5-Itami getting injured

6-Itami getting killed

Right now, four through six were taking place. Itami, being as fit as she was, she was able to put up somewhat of a fight. Her hair, now shortened by a considerable amount, was wild and uneven. The rest of her hair that had been cut off was gripped in the man's hand, however...he had managed to stab her. A large wound spread across her back and blood covered the snow and wall. He dropped Itami's hair and glared at Itami.

"You asshole! My hair!" shouted Itami as she launched her switchblade at the man. He dodged it and Itami looked to Sakura.

"My sword," demanded Itami. Sakura tossed it to her without question.

"Let's do this," called Itami, ignoring her bleeding back. Deidara nodded and put his hand in his clay bags.

'Ok, so I have enough clay to do a small fight, this can't drag on,' Deidara decided as he watched Itami run forward. She brought her sword up and met with the guy half way as they pushed against each other and appeared evenly matched until dark icy blue chakra went through his sword and he pushed Itami back. Itami scowled in response and something changed in her, which made her push back with equal force.

**1st PERSON ITAMI**

I hardened the blood in my arms making myself able to push harder. We were evenly matched...kind of. I had to stay cautious of his chakra since I had no idea what it would do.

Ok, let's think. He's a ninja who has a chakra infused sword, I'm a girl with barely any chakra and I'm not a ninja. I think that I charged in too quickly so I should have come up with a plan. Sadly, I didn't and now I'm stuck in a fight I will most likely lose.

"Itami, duck, un!" Deidara shouted. I dropped and watched as a few clay spiders flew over my head. They landed on the man, who merely raised an eyebrow.

"Little clay sculptures? And you call yourself a ninja?" he laughed. Deidara merely smirked.

"Katsu." The man was thrown back from the small explosion, but the noise attracted the attention of nearby ninja.

I wasn't sure if I was happy to see the rest of Sakura's team, or if I was sad. I mean, Deidara and I now had to beat it or else, but on the other hand, now this guy can't kill me! He can't beat Kakashi and Shikamaru; they took down Hidan and Kakuzu! With Naruto's help…. but still.

Ino jumped forward and brought Sakura back. I looked to Deidara.

"Quick, while they're fighting let's get out of here!" I whispered and Deidara nodded. He grabbed my hand and started to get away. We were stealthy, and the best part?

The snow stopped!

After Deidara stole a few large jackets which he proceeded to cover me in, we set out to climb through the mountain. Then we would get Deidara's clay in the village and we could fly home, so then I wouldn't have to deal with a damn mountain ever again.

That sounds awesome; I have a new hatred for mountains...I think.

"Itami, I think we should stop so I can check your wounds, un." I looked over at Deidara and just noticed it was getting dark. We had been trekking through the snow.

"Sure, let's find a cave." I suggested. We walked around trying to find a cave and when we finally found one hidden behind a few trees, we settled inside. It was a good medium sized cave that trapped heat and it had the entrance in a perfect spot that would let the smoke from our fire out.

I peeled off like five layers of jackets before I was just in my tank top. Deidara looked at my back and I felt him prod the wound quite a few times.

"This fucker is a good one, un," Deidara announced after a moment. I felt him prod my back again. "I'm going to try and heal it to the best of my ability, yeah."

I felt a warm sensation go through the stinging wound on my back and I almost moaned. I didn't, but I almost did. Soon it stopped and Deidara swore loudly. "Fuck!"

"What's wrong?" I questioned as I went to feel my back. I didn't feel my wound anymore; I did feel crusty blood though.

"Your back scarred! I was trying to heal it so it wouldn't scar, yeah," Deidara muttered. I shrugged.

"Its fine, I've already got a ton of scars." I waved it off as I went to pull one of my jackets back on. Deidara stopped me and I felt his cool hand on my shoulder. His hand mouth didn't lick me surprisingly. His hand mouths often licked whatever they touched; they even ate his blanket once. Although Hidan and I may have been a part of that….

"You have so many scars, un. Not even ninja get this many scars," Deidara whispered. I shrugged again.

"Eh, my family life is crap," I admitted. Deidara nodded in agreement as he traced one on my shoulder. I briefly had a flashback of the ride in the car before the crash; Jack had been tracing the scars on my shoulder, I think...maybe my arm. I let out a loud sigh that made Deidara stop tracing the scar.

"What?" he questioned gently.

"Nothing, just remembering my brothers," I admitted. Deidara traced another scar on my shoulder.

"Want to talk about it, yeah?" he asked. I nodded.

"I really miss my brothers most of all, they're my life back in my world. Jack is hilarious, and he also watches some of our show so I can talk with him and rant. Then Chris is a bit smarter, but he's more curious so he'll experiment and I think one day he'll be a mad scientist making zombies. Jack will probably be something involving either racing or athletics. Point is...I miss my brothers a lot; they're special to me," I ranted. Deidara was soothingly rubbing my back; truthfully if we weren't so close, all the touchy feely stuff would make me uncomfortable.

"Want to talk about your home life more, un?" I nodded.

"Back in my world, I'm a pretty messed up kid I guess. I mean, no one has weird bi-colored eyes like me...well some people do, but it's rare. And no one has dark crayon red tips or hair that is so fucking random…" I looked at a random long strand of hair; the tips were already starting to go back to being red. I don't know how my hair did it, but I swear it was a genetic mutation. It had to be!

Deidara took a piece of my hair and twirled it around in-between his fingers.

"Your hair is nice Itami, it's unique, yeah." I shrugged.

"Then my scars...no one has scars. No one. Then I have a crappy family life: a drunk father who is abusive, an uncaring mother who cares more for perfection then her kids most of the time, I think my two brothers are all that held me together all these years really...it's tough bottling up feeling, you know." I sighed and pushed the hair from my face. My hair was now probably shoulder length in some places, then to my mid back in other places. My hair grew fast so I wouldn't worry too much. In a few months my hair would be back to being at my butt again.

"Itami." I froze at Deidara's tone, my hand tucking a hair behind my ear. I felt Deidara grab my arm and pull it towards him. I looked away as he turned my arm to see all the lines up my arm that had scarred from me cutting.

"Itami," Deidara whispered before he looked at me and pulled my head so I would look at him. "You did this to yourself?" My other fist smashed into the wall.

"Damn it!" I shouted. I glared at the fire before scowling at the wall.

"It's not like I wanted to, but once you do it...once I bottled it all up too long, it was that or snap! And it's not like I wanted to snap, so yeah! I cut! There I said it, I cut!" I snapped before I felt a burst of emotion in my chest and an unexpected sob coursed up through my chest. Before I knew it, tears were threatening to spill form my eyes. I refused to let them fall though. Instead, my bangs hung over my eyes as I reached up and wiped them away. I was shocked when Deidara pulled me to him and trapped me in an embrace.

"You shouldn't bottle it all up, Itami, yeah." he whispered. I took a deep breath.

"Everyone deals with things their own way. I just happen to deal by bottling things up." Deidara forced me to look up at him.

"That's not a good way to deal with things, Itami, un," he murmured. I looked into his eyes, and we were caught in a stare. I was lost in the deep blue of his eyes. And before I knew it, our faces were getting closer.

And unlike before whenever we would get this close, no one interrupted us.

Our lips met once again and like the last few times, it felt like it did in books. Sparks flying throughout my body, my lips tingling and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I had never felt this way before.

And I tried to deny the reason for it.

I mean...I'm Itami Duncan; I'm a badass teenager who doesn't give a shit about anything! Right?

So I tried to deny it.

I tried to deny the fact that I, Itami Duncan, am falling for Deidara, a supposed to be fictional S ranked ninja criminal.

What the fuck is wrong with my life? I just wanted a normal life, you know. When I was a little ten year old, I wanted to be an actress like every other ten year old. But then abuse started and life went south. That was normal-ish. But when I got into that car accident and made a wish, my life took a turn towards insanity. I went to a supposedly fictional world.

And so, I really want to know, what the fuck did I do to get this?

But back to the major issue...

I was falling for Deidara.

* * *

**AN**

**So, did it suck? It probably did since I'm super tired and I've been literally drowning in homework. Seriously! My bed gets covered in it and I had like binders covering me! School sucks.**

**Oh yes, thanks to Rose Lillian Marshall 2 for betaing since Shidonii-kun is having computer problems.**

**Note by RLM2: Itachi is awesome. Hands down. Deidara will belong to Itami-chan! ^_^**

**RLM2(I'm sorry, but your pen name is too long!) likes Itachi and I suggest you go check out her story. It's pretty good.**

**Q-Hm, ever had a crush? It could be a major crush, a little crush, hell even a crush on a fiction character.**

**A-I want a few video games, like a Rune Factory one, I want to get the Sims 3 packs that I lost the codes and discs for when I had to transfer to a new computer, I also want the Sims 2 things I'm missing from my old computer, I want some money for music, I want a bunch of Naruto things I know I'm getting, an Akatsuki beanie, an Akatsuki poster, an Akatsuki cloud wrist band, Shuriken earrings, a Neji plushie since they were out of Deidara's(FUCKKK!), a leaf necklace, and that's all I can remember right now… I also want a new IPod since mine is nicknamed the 'Dino-Pod' since it doesn't have a camera and it's like version 1 or something….**

**Review and tell me your thoughts please.**

**Bye**


	30. Paradise

**AN-**

**So, my backpack ripped in half the other day. My art teacher had to duct tape it back together. I am now being forced to use my locker by my short friend who I call Piggeh, and she calls me Stephano, if you know what that's from I think you're my new internet-buddy. But yeah, so I'm updating because I'm happy.**

**Enjoy the chapter.**

* * *

"OUCH! YOU JASHIN DAMNED BITCH!"

"SHUT THE HELL UP, YOU MOTHERFUCKING ASSHOLE! WHERE DID YOU PUT MY IPOD DAMN IT!"

If you couldn't tell that I was reunited with the Akatsuki, then you must be deaf.

"I DIDN'T TOUCH IT, DAMN IT!" Then, following that statement was, "OUCH! STOP STABBING ME, YOU FUCKING BITCH!"

"SHUT THE HELL UP AND JUST GIVE ME MY IPOD BACK, YOU FUCKING DICK!"

"Itami, un, he can't give you back your iPod, yeah." I turned around to glare at Deidara. I probably looked like the spawn of Satan; my hands and shirt covered in blood, a knife in my hand, my face scrunched up in anger...

"And why the fuck not?" I growled. He pointed to the blood and disassembled body parts that made up Hidan. At the moment, I was gripping Hidan's head in my hand.

"He can't really get your iPod, un." Deidara kicked the tip of his sandal at Hidan's limp body; it didn't even twitch. "Or move at all, yeah."

"Well then, he should tell me where my iPod is before I decide that he no longer needs his balls or his head," I snapped.

"I didn't touch it, damn it! Now bring me to Kakuzu so he can put me together bitch!" Hidan yelled. I glared at him before dropping his head on the floor.

"I think I'll go look for my iPod, come on Deidara," I huffed. Deidara obediently followed me, thinking that I was the scarier of the two.

That's right; these guys are all my bitches. I own them.

And so, I stomped to the next target-Sasori.

I slammed into his room and walked over to his desk where he sat with a few vials of different colored things. Oh, and there was a bucket of my blood there too. Lovely.

"What?" Sasori gave me a dead stare as he put down the book he was writing things down in. I peered over his shoulder at the book.

"Your handwriting is shit," I commented, looking down at the writing.

"It isn't my handwriting, it's not even my book," Sasori muttered as he stood to his full height, an inch above my head. It's not fair! Because I am obsessive, I know that Sasori and Deidara should be under my height, but no, they're both taller than me. God damn it! Someone should really update that page I was reading about their heights.

"Then what and who's is it?" I questioned, looking down trying to decipher the kanji. Sadly, it just looked like silly little dashes put together to me.

"It was sent to me. It has some great recipe in it, according to the note attached. I'm going to try it out," Sasori explained, peering down at the book once more.

"Well, don't die...oh and have you seen my iPod?" I questioned. Sasori blinked at me.

"Konan had it." I nodded and pulled Deidara with me to retrieve my iPod from Konan.

We reached her room where I found her peering at a diagram as she made careful folds on a paper. Peering at the diagram, I noticed that it was a diagram of how to make an awesome paper airplane. I had the diagram on my iPod.

"Ah hah! So you had my iPod! Give it!" I demanded. Without looking up, Konan handed me a heavy box that was not my iPod.

"I gave it to Nagato, so take this to him if you're looking for it," she stated, not taking her full attention off the paper airplane she was making. I groaned and Deidara snorted.

"This is going to lead us to everyone in the base soon, yeah," Deidara muttered. I ignored him and instead chose to walk towards Leader's room, Deidara following behind me.

I walked in without knocking and Leader looked up from where he had been doing paperwork. I plopped the box down on his desk.

"From Konan?" he questioned. I nodded.

"Yeah." I leaned over the box before he could grab it. "Now, where's my iPod?" Leader sighed and glared at the box.

"I don't have it. Konan probably just wanted you to bring this here and told you I had it." Deidara laughed as I growled and stood up.

"Now where will we end up, yeah?" Deidara wondered as I stomped down to Konan's room. Before I could say anything, she interrupted me.

"Kisame and Itachi had it, last time I checked," she stated, still folding the paper airplane. Deidara and I set off to locate Itachi and Kisame, which wasn't too hard with Deidara's ability to sense chakra.

When we entered the training room, I glared at Kisame and Itachi who were taking a breather under a tree. I held out my hand as I approached.

"iPod, now!" I snapped. Itachi calmly blinked as he turned to look at me.

"Tobi relieved us of it, I believe he went into the living room after hearing Hidan's yelling," Itachi reported. I scowled.

"Hey Itami." I looked at Kisame. "What was Hidan yelling about?" I chuckled.

"I thought he had my iPod so I chopped him into pieces and left him there," I stated, patting the bloody sword I had on my side and the knife I had sticking out of the pocket of my pants. Kisame chortled with laughter.

"Well that explains that...Tobi is probably bored of Hidan yelling and probably went somewhere else. Good luck finding him." I could still hear Kisame laughing as Deidara and I walked to the kitchen.

"Alright, now how to find Tobi?" I wondered, thinking. Deidara scowled.

"Damn menace, un," Deidara muttered as I snapped my fingers with an idea.

"Oh Tobi!" I called, grinning evilly, "Deidara-senpai wants a hug!" Deidara went from a blank face to a horror filled one. In moments, Tobi was upon us. He tackled Deidara and Deidara swore loudly.

"Damn it Tobi, get off me un!" Deidara yelled. I grabbed Tobi and pulled him back towards me.

"Hello Tobi, do you have my iPod?" I questioned.

"Tobi doesn't have Itami-chan's iPod," Tobi responded swiveling around to look at me. I glared into his eye hole. "But Tobi did see Kakuzu-san take it." I grinned.

"Good boy Tobi." I grabbed Deidara's hair and pulled him along with me as we went to go find Kakuzu. However...half way there, we were sidetracked.

"Itami, I need to have a word with Deidara," Leader called from his doorway as we searched for Kakuzu. I frowned, but let go of Deidara.

"And I have your iPod now," Leader added. I scowled but nodded before leaving. I had a password on the episodes that would affect things such as Tobi's identity, Konan's death, Itachi and Sasuke's past, things like that.

I trotted to the living room where Kisame, Hidan (who was now put together again) and Kakuzu were involved in a game of poker. I grinned.

"Up for strip poker?" I called. Kisame and Hidan grinned in response as they made room for me to sit.

This was going to be good.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

I am an extremely good cheater. But the Akatsuki didn't find out until after Kisame, Hidan and Kakuzu were all clad in just their boxers and for Kakuzu, his face mask. I however had only lost my sweatshirt from the first non-cheating round.

"You have to be cheating, you have to be," Kisame muttered as he glared at his cards. I smirked.

"Sorry fish-cakes, but I doubt I could cheat with a bunch of ninja watching me," I stated as I found myself with a good hand without my cheating.

"This is why we don't play with Itami," Itachi commented as he and Sasori watched us from their own game.

"God damn Kakuzu, looks like you get my shirt," I muttered as I pulled off my tank top and handed it to him, leaving me in my arm wraps and my black bra.

"Bet Deidara will be mad he missed this," Hidan smirked. I glared at him.

"Eyes off or else!" I threatened, crossing my arms across my chest.

"It is a nice rack though," Hidan complimented. I shrugged.

"Whatever, next round."

It took another few rounds, and I'm pretty sure they started cheating, but soon I joined them with just my underwear and arm wraps. My spectators whistled when they saw the scars I had. Mainly the one that tattooed my back.

"That sucks," Kisame commented as he stared at a burn tattooed on my thigh.

"Eh, I'm over it, now let us see who gets to go commando!" I shouted. Moments later, a curious Konan walked in. When she did, she stared with a hilarious expression.

"What…" She was speechless until she managed to compose herself back to a straight face. "What are you doing?"

"Strip poker," I replied easily. Konan nodded as she went to sit by Sasori and Itachi.

"Who's winning?" she questioned casually, as if she hadn't just walked into a room of one half naked girl and three half naked men.

"I was until these assholes decided to start cheating," I muttered as I lost yet again.

"C'mon, what's it going to be? Tits?" questioned Hidan. I flipped him off as I debated taking off my arm bands or my bra.

"Is it really such a tough decision?" questioned Sasori.

"Hush, it is," I stated as I looked back and forth. Finally I began to unclasp my bra. But the door behind me swung open as a loud voice called out.

"Hey what's-What the fuck, un?" We turned around and found Deidara, jaw wide open as he stared at us all.

"Ooh, my iPod, gimme!" I took my iPod from the startled Deidara and I put it in my bra. I turned and grabbed my clothing which I quickly pulled on.

"Well that was fun. I'm going to go to my room now, see ya later suckers!" I laughed as from my sleeve I pulled a few cards that I placed on the table. As I left, I heard Itachi mutter. "Idiots...they're ninja and they couldn't catch her cheating."

I made my way to my room where I dropped onto my bed and pulled my iPod out of my bra and I began listening. Soon my door opened and Deidara walked in, a blank look on his face. He sat next to me and I offered him an ear bud, he took it and we sat listening to music.

_Paradise by Coldplay_

_When she was just a girl  
She expected the world  
But it flew away from her reach  
So she ran away in her sleep  
Dreamed of para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
Every time she closed her eyes  
Whoa-oh-oh oh-oooh oh-oh-oh_

"Hey Itami." I looked at Deidara. He turned his head to look at me.

_When she was just a girl  
She expected the world  
But it flew away from her reach  
And the bullets catch in her teeth_

"Mm?" I asked

_Life goes on  
It gets so heavy  
The wheel breaks the butterfly_

"If I died while you were here, what would you do, yeah?" I thought about it carefully.

_Every tear, a waterfall  
In the night, the stormy night  
She closed her eyes  
In the night, the stormy night  
Away she'd fly.  
And dreamed of para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
Whoa-oh-oh oh-oooh oh-oh-oh_

"I guess I'd probably get really mad, sad too...you're close to me. And I vowed to protect you all. If you died, then I guess I'd feel like shit," I answered after a while.

_She dreamed of para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
Whoa-oh-oh oh-oooh oh-oh-oh._

"What would you do if I died?" I questioned. Deidara took his time to answer.

_La la la La  
La la la  
So lying underneath those stormy skies.  
She said oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.  
I know the sun must set to rise._

"I'd be upset, yeah. You're precious to me, I guess...more so then I usually let someone, yeah." I nodded.

_This could be para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
This could be para- para- paradise  
Whoa-oh-oh oh-oooh oh-oh-oh._

"What do you think Itami, about our world compared to your own, un?"

_This could be para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
Could be para- para- paradise  
Whoa-oh-oh oh-oooh oh-oh-oh._

"It's nice here. There's no pollution and the people are nicer, I guess. It's not as advanced in technology, but I can be me without feeling like I'm judged here. It's kind of like… like paradise."

_This could be para- para- paradise  
Para- para- paradise  
Could be para- para- paradise  
Whoa-oh-oh oh-oooh oh-oh-oh._

And it was true. To me, the Narutoverse was indeed a paradise where I could let the problems from my world just get lifted off my shoulders.

I liked it here.

It was paradise.

* * *

**AN**

**I do not own Paradise, all of it is owned by Coldplay and such. It's an awesome song though, and it fits the story well. I was also debating on whether to use Light Up the Sky by Yellowcard in this chapter but decided against it and picked Paradise instead.**

**I forgot to mention this a few chapters ago and it's really bugging me because someone pointed it out in a review. It was about Deidara and Sakura. here's why they didn't fight, one Sakura and Deidara were both low on chakra, two is Deidara was pretty much out of clay except for maybe a few clay spiders, and three, Itami threatened them and Sakura didn't want to lose Itami because of interrogation and Deidara is Itami's best friend pretty much.**

**Now that's off my mind I'm happy again.**

**Ok, more thoughts, I made Christmas cookies. I tried making people but when they spread they got all bloated, and one I made red and called The Blob. The other four became really fat people, the girls I gave chocolate chip boobs and be-dazzled pants and shirts, the guys didn't get much other than no rainbow hair like the girls, they were bald.**

**Q-I'm re-using a question, what song do you think fits Insomnia? And don't go back and steal an answer from the other chapter I used this question on.**

**A-Like no one answered, but I do have a crush on this boy, problem is I'm a 'shy' nerdish person, and he's all sporty and popular. Not to mention I'm not very attractive, brown hair, blue-gray eyes, pale skin, weird forehead with purple-red marks form acne that's going away, the only thing we can relate about is we're both in honors and we both have shitty acne. His isn't getting better though, I'm wondering if maybe he'll come up to me and be like "How'd you get rid of your acne?" and I'll answer and then 3. Actually before I had a crush on him I had a temperamental bipolar mood swing on him so I think he thinks I hate him. Or he thinks I'm weird. Forever alone is me.**

**OH MY GOD! IT'S CHAPTER 30?! Where has the time gone…. Insomnia isn't going to be much longer; we're soon going to enter one of the final arcs after this filler chapter.**

**RLM2- ^_^ Stay tuned for the next chapter of Insomnia! :D**

**Sayonara**


	31. Running Out

**AN**

**I suddenly felt like writing this chapter, I was watching Cry play Corpse Party before this, so if it's a bit dramatic, it's probably because of that. I kind of wish they make Corpse Party into an anime, it looks like it'd be an awesome anime, at least a movie! Although in the video of the animations I saw of it, Sachiko looked like a little Orochimaru, seriously! At first I was like "….Why is Orochimaru in Corpse Party?" Then I realized… "Oh, its Sachiko." Lol.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

_**3RD**__** PERSON**_

The atmosphere was tense around the three figures as they stood in a deep, pregnant silence. The large figure, sitting atop a throne, was deep in thought while breathing deeply.

The only female of the three was leaning by a window, watching the dark fog outside of the glass. She turned when she heard a deep sigh from across the room.

"This is terribly annoying." muttered the purple eyed man as he leaned against the wall, looking up at the ceiling as if it would entertain him. Suddenly, however, both the female and the purple eyed figure looked to the figure on the throne as his fist made a loud bang as it came down onto the stone.

"I have had enough of this game." he growled, standing.

"What are you doing?" questioned the female, standing up straight.

"I will end this soon, Megamiaiseimei, I have grown tired of watching the pitiful human girl fool around with my world." spat the figure as he walked down to where she stood. She merely looked back out the window.

"The world isn't yours, Sosūdearukoto," Megamiaiseimei looked back at him with a smirk on her usual calm, emotionless face, "The Prime Being controls all worlds, He merely gave you slight rule in his spot while he recovers from that day." Sosūdearukoto scowled.

"What gives you the right to mock me; you are only a lowly Goddess! I am the Prime Beings advisor!" snapped Sosūdearukoto. Shinigami snorted.

"Yes," he smirked, "And that is why Megami has a large beautiful castle, and I have a large Hell-like one to fit my taste, but you have this smelly old dank place. You sure are important!" Sosūdearukoto growled at Shinigami.

"Never mind that, but this game will be over soon, I will see to it! That little human girl will die!"

**1****ST**** PERSON, ITAMI**

I sneezed and scowled at the food Konan was preparing. Mainly the evil things known as tomatoes, the evil fucking things I was allergic to. Deadly little fuckers.

"Someone must be talking about you, you've been sneezing for the past ten minutes." commented Konan. I shrugged.

"I don't think so," I glared at the evil fuckers, "Its probably because of those tomatoes, I'm allergic." Konan stopped cutting them to blink at them curiously.

"Tomatoes? Is that even possible?" questioned Konan.

"Shut up!" I snapped with a huff as I glared at the book.

Curse the recipe requiring tomatoes.

Konan merely snorted as she continued cooking.

"If you're not going to help go bug Deidara, you're distracting me." ordered Konan. I shrugged.

"Fine, I'll go find Deidara and bug him!" I huffed, standing from my stool and stomping to the living room. I entered the living room and observed what was going on. Deidara and Sasori were having a heated glaring contest, that was about it.

"You're an idiot, Deidara." stated Sasori with a glare. Neither of them noticed me yet so I waited.

"It's what Leader wants, don't blame me, un!" argued Deidara.

"Either way, someone will be hurt, Deidara." hissed Sasori, turning around and storming out through the opposite door. Pretending not to hear, I walked back in.

"Hey Deidara!" I called, Deidara grinned upon seeing me.

"Hey Itami! What's up, yeah?" he questioned as he walked over to me.

"Eh, Konan's making dinner because if I touch the tomatoes I'm a goner." I shrugged as a large yawn erupted from my mouth. Soon after, I sneezed.

"Someone must be talking about you, un." decided Deidara. I shrugged and jumped onto the couch, Deidara at next to me after a moment.

"So Deidara, want to do something?" I inquired.

"Sure, un. What do you want to do, hm?" replied Deidara. I shrugged again.

"I don't know, I've been pretty lazy lately so nothing too athletic, what do you want to do?" Deidara shrugged.

"Why don't we go and bug Konan, yeah?" I grinned.

"Sure." We walked back to the kitchen where Konan was already being pestered by a hungry Hidan.

"Ah Itami! Good! Entertain Hidan so I can get the food ready!" ordered Konan. I frowned.

"Fine." But I did do as told.

"C'mon, let's go upstairs." I ordered and Hidan followed me, obviously bored enough to do so without a fight. As we walked I yawned again.

"Hey bitch, you should sleep or something." suggested Hidan as I stopped on the stairs. Suddenly my vision wavered and I felt myself sway slightly.

"Bitch?" questioned Hidan

"Itami, what's wrong, yeah?" asked Deidara.

"I'm fine!" I snapped as suddenly, my legs gave way and I fell back. Luckily, I only rolled down half the stairs before hitting Hidan and Deidara. They caught me, and the noise I made attracted the attention of Konan.

But that didn't matter because suddenly, everything went dark for me.

I doubt I was out for long, but when I woke up I was no longer with the Akatsuki. I was in a garden, it had many different plants that I couldn't name even if I tried, and some plants looked strange. Also, there was a white haze blocking out the sky, but it was very bright anyway.

"Ah, Itami!" I turned to see the angel that had seen me in the hospital. Seeing as how I didn't know her name, I chose to just stare as she walked over.

"Why am I here?" I questioned bluntly. She chuckled.

"Your time is almost up." she answered. I blinked.

"I don't understand." I stated. She laughed.

"You have to choose a world, then either seal yourself in your world, or the 'Narutoverse' as you call it." explained the angel. I was probably still making a confused face so she led me over to a small bench where we sat facing each other.

"So what exactly is happening?" I questioned. She gave me a gentle smile.

"Your body, form the lack of sleep it has been getting, is going to start shutting down. When you wake up, you'll barely be able to stand, I give you about a week left before you have to choose." explained the angel.

"And if I don't choose?" I inquired. She gave me a grave look.

"You die."

Great.

"Your body won't be able to function from the lack of energy and your body will just shut down. Your heart wouldn't be able to pump blood and you would die quickly, but painfully. It's a side effect of a deal a few gods' made." she explained, more in detail.

"Ok…." I trailed as I looked down at my bare feet.

"This is a tough decision Itami, I want you to think carefully and think of all your bonds and how others will be affected by your decision." she stated as we locked eyes.

"I understand, I will think very carefully." I replied.

"Good, now I'm going to send you back, and Itami," she gave me a smile, "I believe in you."

Everything went dark for me again.

I opened my eyes what felt like years later. I blinked away a heaviness I felt on my eye lids and I sat up, finding it difficult to move my sluggish limbs. I looked around and saw Konan and Deidara quietly speaking next to my bed, which instead of the infirmary was my room.

"Hey." Both looked at me in shock.

"Itami!" cried Konan in relief, "I didn't think you were going to wake up, you looked completely dead!"

I peered past her at the mirror on my wall and almost grimaced. The time was catching up with me; the bags under my eyes had grown from being hardly noticeable to noticeable. My already pale skin was practically paper white and I looked… well dead. Or extremely ill where I would most likely die very soon.

Neither was appealing.

"Get everyone in here." I ordered, Konan rose an eyebrow but nodded nonetheless. She left the room and I yawned before looking to Deidara, who looked rather pale, himself.

"What's up?" I questioned.

"I have a mission soon." he admitted.

"What mission?" I inquired. Deidara looked away.

"I have to go…. fight Sasuke, un." admitted Deidara.

"What?!" I snapped, "Why?"

"Leader said that we needed to go and do exactly what happened in the story you have so that you know exactly what will happen, that means we need to have me fight Sasuke and pretend to die, yeah." explained Deidara. I sighed.

"Can you do that?" I questioned. Deidara gave me a half-assed grin.

"Sure, un!" His smile wasn't convincing me though.

"What happens if you can't make a huge explosion though?" I asked. Deidara frowned.

"I die." I gaped at him.

"Oh hell no! I remember saying awhile ago that I was not letting ANY of you guys die, that includes you, Deidara!" I snarled.

"It's not like I have a choice, un." muttered Deidara. I scowled.

"You do have a choice." I mumbled, fully knowing that he was right. He didn't have a choice; Leader would kill him should he disobey.

"Just be careful." I sighed.

"I will be, un." Deidara smiled at me and then, the door slammed open. The rest for the Akatsuki, minus Leader, all came in and grouped around me.

"So what the fuck do you want bitch?" questioned Hidan.

"I have less than a week left…." I trailed off.

"Before what?" questioned Sasori.

"I need to be sealed, either I am sealed to stay in this world, or my body in this world is sealed so that I can't come back. And if I'm not sealed…." I looked at them all.

"I will die."

* * *

**AN**

**I think it was a good place to end it.**

**Anyways, I give it about…. this chapter, next chapter, a chapter after that, then a chapter after that (Maybe, possibly only 3 haven't decided if I want to drag it out or squeeze it in) before Insomnia is done. However, for all of you loyal readers who would absolutely murder me to leave it at what I'm planning, there will be a sequel I would post right after I post the last chapter.**

**On my profile is a poll for the title of the sequel, please vote. I am rather partial to one answer, and one answer was the idea of**_**Isella of the wolf tribe**_**, she suggested Hypersomnia. Which my spell check seems to want to change to Hypotenuse, which is what we're doing in math and I FUCKING HATE IT! I hate triangles, they mock me with their radicals and their theorem and ugh! I am pretty sure I failed the test today on radicals and shit by the way. **

**I hate school.**

**Oh, another important question, I'm getting a new phone. Any suggestions? I'd rather get the Iphone 5, if it can hold music. My dad's bugging me about it because our phones are becoming obsolete, I don't really think my blackberry is obsolete but whatever.**

**Oh, yes, I hit that asshole form Science yesterday. He was sitting in front of me in math tutorials so I jabbed him in the head with a pencil, then he hit me with a pencil so I hit him back with it. Since our teacher is a ninja, I didn't punch him like I wanted to.**

**That's all the fun stories I have for today, oh! I want a PS2 just to play Shadow of the Colossus; my dad decided it would be better to get a PS3 because that's the newer system. So I think I'm getting a PS3, I'm excited.**

**I have an Obito/OC story stuck in my head, so I'm writing it, but it won't be uploaded to fanfiction for awhile….**

**Q-Go to the poll on my page, there's your question.**

**A-Ahahaha, songs! I love this question, I LOVE IT! I love the song Paradise, the song Get Out Alive that **_**S-S**_** (I AM NOT WRITING OUT NAMES! You know who you are, and if you really care then you can go to the reviews and read the review yourself!) Suggested and **_**The Akatsukis Pet**_**, whose name is probably the easiest for me to spell, thus why I am putting th entire thing, you are awesome because you complimented me. You get a smiley face-:D. Ah, yes, back to the Q, I also love the song 'Light up the Sky' for Deidara, and the song Street Dreams, was mentioned at some point, it might have been in an earlier review for the last chapter.**

**AH! Fan art, thank to **_**GingerConspiracies**_** for drawing Itami, the link is on my profile. It's by the top so you'll have no trouble finding it. **

**Sayonara!**


	32. Christmas

**AN-**

**FUCK YES! IT'S CHRISTMAS!**

* * *

_Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the base_  
_Not a ninja was stirring, not even Sasori_  
_The stockings were not hung by the chimney and the tree was not up,_  
_However this just would not do._

_**1**__**ST**__** PERSON ITAMI**_

I'm not a big holiday person, sure I liked Halloween for dressing up and scaring the shit out of little kids and Thanksgiving I liked because it got good food. Valentine's Day sucked because no one liked me, and if they did I usually scared them off. Independence day I liked fireworks, and I didn't mind finding the eggs with money on Easter.

But then came Christmas.

Christmas was my favorite holiday. And now, I was stuck in the Narutoverse, I was no happy with this because the Akatsuki didn't celebrate Christmas. I didn't like this idea, so I made it my goal to change this.

When everyone was asleep, even Sasori was knocked out; I went into the living room with my stuff. I quickly set off to put up stockings and I also made sure to put something in each, I put in kunai since they are ninja after all.

Then came the problem of having a Christmas tree. I was strong, but not strong enough to haul a tree into the base. I decided to save that for last and instead began to bake cookies, I made gingerbread men shaped ones, tree shaped ones, and just regular chocolate chip ones.

I put them all on a platter in the living room where I stuck a few in my mouth and went to work.

It took me two hours of silence before I finally made some noise.

As I moved the furniture around to make room for the tree I would have to somehow get eventually, the chair decided that it wanted to fall over and make a loud bang that echoed around the entire base. I froze and stood there, hoping no one would hear and wake up. When nothing happened I grabbed another cookie and went back to my job of putting mistletoe up, which was hard since I had problems with my chakra holding me up too long.

"Itami, yeah?"

I made a very un-characteristic squeak as I slipped from my concentrated spot on the ceiling. I fell down and landed in a pair of arms. I looked up to find a half asleep, slightly confused Deidara.

"Sup?" I questioned casually. Deidara let me down as I grinned at him.

"What are you doing?" he questioned as he observed the room.

"I want to celebrate Christmas, so I'm putting everything up." I explained. Deidara snorted at me in response.

"Christmas, un?" I scowled at him before he let out a short laugh, "Sure, un. I'll help."

I gave Deidara the job of hanging up decorations, including the dreaded mistletoe. I watched and ate cookies since I did everything else. Finally, we had to get the Christmas tree.

We trouped outside and then, went right back in to get warmer clothes. Especially me because it was snowing.

"Fuck it all." I muttered as I stomped through the snow, thankfully not even a foot deep. Deidara laughed at my misery as we continued on to the pine trees.

"This one." I decided, pointing at a healthy looking pine tree that was a good three feet taller than Deidara.

"That's going to be annoying, why not this one, un?" asked Deidara, pointing to a small tree.

"That's a Charlie Brown tree, I'd rather introduce you guys to Christmas again with a bigger tree, we can do Charlie Brown next year." I decided as I gestured for Deidara to start cutting. He did as ordered; only he sighed.

When the tree was down, we both grabbed an end and hauled it to the base. Then when we decorated it, the lights tried to electrocute me and hang me, they just didn't want to go on the damn tree.

Finally though, it was about six in the morning and everyone else would come down to a Christmas-fied living room, hallway, dining room, and kitchen. And there was mistletoe everywhere you went; I don't know what Deidara was thinking. I decided to go wake everyone up obnoxiously.

My first victim was Hidan, Deidara and I creeped into his room and then, we pounced.

"Get up off your fucking lazy ass Hidan, it's Christmas!" I screeched, Deidara yelled something similar, only his was full of un's and yeah's. Hidan woke with a yell followed by a string of swears that I happily covered his mouth to stop.

"Don't swear Hidan, its Christmas, un!" chirped Deidara with an evil grin. Hidan tried swearing more, but I kept my grip on until he just threw me off, Deidara gracefully jumping off and dodging.

"What the fuck bitch?!" shouted Hidan, no doubt waking up the rest of the base.

"It's Christmas!" I announced again, pointing to my sweater that read 'its Christmas bitches! Bring out the presents!' in big green letters.

"Fine." groaned Hidan after a minute of me glaring intensely at him.

"Good boy." I praised as I frolicked out with Deidara following me, then remembering something I called back, "Oh and meet in the living room in a few!"

Next we went to Konan's room, where she was just getting up.

"It's Christmas!" I wailed as I shot into her room and tackled her. Knowing it was me, she allowed me to tackle her to the floor before giggling.

"I know." she answered, "Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas! Oh and meet in the living room in a few." I cheered as I went to my next victim. Sasori was in his room tampering with something. Deidara and I pranced in and Sasori glared at us.

"Merry Christmas Danna!" I called, pointing to my shirt. Sasori nodded.

"Merry Christmas to you as well, Itami, brat." he replied. I nodded, happy with his answer. I walked out into the hallway and cupped my hands around my mouth.

"Everyone meet in the living room damn it!" I shouted at the top of my lungs, I heard a few groans that followed.

"C'mon, everyone else is probably gathering in the living room since I yelled it." I ordered Deidara who obediently followed. It took half an hour but soon, everyone sat in the living room, and most praised me on my Christmas decorating.

"It looks very nice Itami." complimented Konan.

"It sucks." Hidan soon found a knife with a bow wrapped on the end in his forehead.

"Merry Christmas, asshole." I muttered angrily. Hidan only growled and swore at me in response.

Not a lot of gifts were exchanged, and we all decided Kakuzu was Jewish so he didn't celebrate much. He did like the money I gave him as a present though.

However, in the end, only two people were stuck under the mistletoe. It was more towards the end, when we were leaving to go to bed. Deidara and I found ourselves together, under the mistletoe. And you can't deny mistletoe or else someone dies, or just bad luck. Frankly, I didn't need either.

So Deidara and I stared at each other, although I didn't really care we were kissing. We kissed before, at Halloween, on Twister, the redo, in the cave, hell he was pretty damn special to me if you think of it like that.

So we kissed, or made out. Whichever you thought. All I know is that we ignored everything but each other, until Hidan came in, whistled at us, and I threw a knife at him. He left missing an eyeball.

"That was something, un." decided Deidara. I nodded.

"I'm pretty sure this was the best Christmas ever."

* * *

**AN**

**How did you like my poem at the top? Cheesy right?**

**It was short but its late, and I just finished downloading Amnesia The Dark Descent after almost dying from a heart attack upon realizing that the email I gave it was spelled wrong, so I had to make the email address spelled wrong but it all worked out and now I wanna play it.**

**How was all your Christmas's? And if you don't celebrate, how was your Hanukkah or Kwanza or any other holiday around now?**

**For Christmas, I got a ton of Naruto stuff including two shirts, an Akatsuki beanie, and an Akatsuki wristband. I wore just all and my cousin told me I looked like I was about to mug someone, I was also wearing my ripped jeans. I also got videogames such as The Walking Dead for XBOX, Tomb Raiders, Bully Scholarship Edition, Just Dance 4, Amnesia The Dark Descent, Harvest Moon A New Beginning, Pokémon Black 2, and stuff like that. I also got a Neji plushie, an Akatsuki poster, and a ton of stuff for my nails. And candy canes. I LOVE candy canes. **

**Bye**


	33. The Decision

**AN**

**I took forever. I am lazy, I went on a trip, was lazy, started school, again, and had to be lazy. Plus I am now OBSESSED with this game called Bully. If you've never played it, get it, play it, love it, and write a Johnny VincentXGirlOC fanfiction for me (Or find the good ones and make those people update). I would love you forever if you did that. It's for Xbox 360, at least that's what I have it for. Although Pewdiepie plays it on computer I think…..**

**Ah yes, and here we are. The final chapters, this one, then the next one, then the sequel! Which I will put up before I put up the last chapter of Insomnia.**

**Anyway, enjoy.**

* * *

"What?" The Akatsuki was surprised.

"Die?" questioned Kisame with a slightly alarmed face. I nodded.

"I'd die, and I'm not too fond of that idea." I replied.

"You need to choose which world though…." pointed out Sasori. I nodded.

"I'm waiting, I want to think it through." I admitted, "I like it here, a lot. But then there's my family, I don't want to just leave my brothers."

"It is a big decision." commented Kakuzu with Itachi nodding in agreement.

"You're our crazy bitch though!" protested Hidan.

"I know I am, but I seriously need to think it through. Give me some space, and time. As much time as possible." I murmured.

"I can seal you when you're ready." muttered Sasori, he left, along with the majority of the Akatsuki. Deidara stayed. He frowned.

"I leave for my mission tomorrow, un."

"Then go, you'll be back. You saw the episode you died, avoid self destruction and you'll be fine. Oh, and since I won't see Itachi again most likely, do me a favor and tell him to not die, and that Sasuke can't trust _him_ if he does die. Don't tell anyone but Itachi, and make sure you're not overheard." Deidara nodded and went to leave.

"And Deidara?" he stopped at the door.

"You're the person I'm closest to here, be back so I can talk to you about this, ok? I want to make sure that I'm making the right choice." I confessed. Deidara paused, and took a deep breath.

"I'll try, un." I frowned as he shut the door.

"You better, you fucking asshole!" I shouted. There was no response.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

My arms, and legs, felt like pudding. Or jello. Either one was a valid description of my limbs. And I couldn't feel my toes. Konan and Sasori were worried, they wanted to do the seal soon. But I was going to wait for Deidara no matter what.

Konan and Sasori sat in silence next to my bed. We were in a dimly lit room with the necessary seals all over the place.

"So, have you decided?" questioned Sasori.

"No." I couldn't even shake my head, my muscles were going.

"Decide soon, Itami." muttered Konan.

I wanted to wait for Deidara! If not, I had been arguing in my head for the past few hours.

_Stay! It's safe here…._

My other side disagreed, **what the hell is wrong with you? Safe? It's not safe here. Go home!**

I'm turning into Zetsu…. great.

_Yes but here we're loved! And Deidara is here, and Konan, and it feels like family here! Itami, stay!_

**No, go back Jashin damn it! You can't just leave Jack and Chris, and Kayan needs you, and Sky and Josh, and all our other friends!**

_At least wait for Deidara before you decide, I bet he'd want you to stay!_

**Yeah, because he likes us! But it's not what he wants that matters, it's what Itami wants that matters!**

_But we need to take others feelings into consideration!_

**Yeah, you're right, Jack and Chris would be suicidal if their baby Tami died, Sky would feel broken, Josh would go all emo and crazy, Kayan would kill herself since this is somewhat her fault, and all our other friends would go suicadel and all depressed!**

_Yes but what about the Akatsuki? Deidara would be heartbroken! And Itami would miss them, and Konan would no longer have a girl to talk to, Hidan no one to scream with anymore, Kakuzu with no one to steal things easily, Pein no one to plot with, Kisame no one to knock around like a punching bag…_

**Punching bag? Fuck that, I think we should go.**

_Stay._

**Go.**

_Stay._

**Go.**

SHUT THE FUCK UP!

At my inside yell, I wished I could put my hand up to my forehead. I was so going Zetsu, let us add to the stay list, Zetsu also has a person who has another personality to talk to.

_See, we should stay!_

**Shut the hell up, wait for Deidara then, he'd want us to leave for our safety!**

_You said before he'd want us to stay though…._

**Shut the hell up!**

I groaned and Konan looked over at me in concern.

"Are you ok?" she questioned. I nodded.

"Fucking shitty headache, when is Deidara getting here? I want his input." I mumbled.

"Hopefully soon, Zetsu will come in with news soon." murmured Konan as she placed a cool cloth on my head. I closed my eyes, and started hallucinating to the voices in my head.

"**We. Go**." muttered the devil side of me, so the go side. She had my black hair, and my ice colored eyes.

"_Stay_." calmly countered my angel side, she had my crimson hair, but she had the mint green eyes.

'Well shit, now I'm hallucinating.' I thought which translated into words for them.

"_Oh joy! Now you can see us_!" cheered my angel side. To make it easy, let us name them Tenshi, for angel, and Akuma, for the devil.

'How long do you think I have left?' It was probably pointless asking figments of my imagination.

"**Probably a few hours tops**." muttered Akuma. I paused.

'Well shit, how long do you think it'll take Deidara?' Tenshi grinned.

"_Hopefully a few minutes! Then we can stay_!" she said with a bubbly attitude.

"**I think he's dead and Zetsu is just procrastinating**." Akuma rejected Tenshi's idea.

"_He is not dead! Deidara said he'd be back_!"

"**He said he'd try**."

"_I_ _believe in him_!"

"**I don't**." Electricity sparked between the two as their eyes narrowed.

"_He'll be back_!" shouted Tenshi.

"**No, I can feel Zetsu's negative emotion, Deidara is dead and we're just sitting here delaying the inevitable**." shouted Akuma.

'You're just my imagination, Deidara is fine. You can't sense Zetsu!' I screamed.

"**We're a part of you, Itami. I can sense Zetsu, don't forget that in the Naruto world, you have chakra, and you can have a mind like yours, one with more inside of you**."

"_It's true_." nodded Tenshi.

My breath froze. Wait, if Akuma could sense Zetsu, then-

The door opening pulled me from my thoughts. There stood Zetsu.

"Well?" asked Konan impatiently.

"Deidara, is dead."

* * *

**AN**

**OH SHIT, it's a cliff hanger.**

**SUSPENSE!**

**Ha, now, back to my earlier dilemma. There are not enough Bully fanfics for Johnny Vincent and an OC, I want to read more. **

**Seriously I'm obsessed. I was cackling like a fucking idiot when I threw marbles on the floor and the same jock got up three times and fell over the same marbles. And I talk to myself while playing.**

**I'm insane.**

**Apparently, now Itami is too. **

**Also, i got an IPhone 5, its awesome. I also got more candy canes to feed my candy cane obsession.**

**AH! I went snowboarding for the first time, thus my delay! I had to jump off the ski lift -_- Its my instructors fault for taking me up withme pretty much screaming i didn't want to and that i woudl die and haunt him. He pulled me with him the first time off and i didn't fall, the second time i had to jump off because they didn't slw it down and my instructor got off without me and then yelled for me to jump. Jashin! Then Lexi comes flying off laughing at me with our other instructor(I'm still mad, i just wanted someone to snowboard with me, i laughed at her when she fell down the stairs and was tackled into the wall by a rollerblading dude.) I went rollerblading in a rink, i was decked out in my Akatsuki wristband, Itachi shirt, leaf necklace, and jeans. Too bad i forgot my Akatsuki beanie at our house.**

**Q-….how about a mission instead? Johnny Vincent OC fanfics, please. If not, what do you think about thsi summary for a story i'm planning?**

_**Summary-Ketsueki Nikushimi wasn't popular. She wasn't strong. No one cared for her. Until she met Team Minato, and Obito. Follow Nikushimi as she grows up, learns to be a ninja, learns what love feels like, and tries to fulfil her dream-"My dream is to protect thos ei care for, no matter the cost, even if it means i die!" But death follows Nikushimi everywhere she goes.**_

**A-Uhm…. poll I think. It's a freaking 3-way tie, WTF! 9 people voted, 3 each way. People, please, stop agreeing.**

**Now it's time for sleep. Every night I fall asleep to a wall scroll with all the Akatsuki staring at me, and me staring back. its awesome.**

**Bye, and don't forget your mission!**


	34. Insomnia

**AN**

**Here it is the final chapter of Insomnia. Sequel is up, it's on my page and its called Wide Awake, enjoy this chapter and check out the first chapter of the sequel.**

* * *

When the sealing had begun, I was lifeless. Hearing Deidara was dead was like… it was like hearing one of my brothers was dead. Only Deidara wasn't like a brother to me, he was possibly more. Then when the sealing was over, I was still lifeless. It's been a month since the sealing, and it sucked.

I chose to leave the Narutoverse.

I don't know why, and I don't know why I chose my world. I guess maybe Akuma won in the argument, or maybe I just felt like I had more in my world. Maybe I just didn't belong in the Narutoverse, I wasn't so used to death. Death shocked me. I still wouldn't cry over death though, death wasn't that big of a deal to me. Only big impacts from death would shock me, complete shocks. Deidara's death I expected, Sasori predicted he would die young, and Deidara was reckless. But I wished he hadn't died. That was why, I was sad.

Waking up in my world was a big affair too. I remember that very well.

It was like waking up and wanting to go back to sleep. You know that feeling, it's the one you get when you have to go to school and you're like 'Fuck this shit, I want to sleep.' and then you get up and go to school only to fall asleep in first period. That was so me, before this insomnia business and stuff.

What I'm calling this is insomnia. Insomnia is when you can't sleep, well I went without sleep for what…. six months? More? Probably more, maybe less. I can't remember truthfully. So yeah, I'm calling this insomnia. The great Insomnia! Nah, just Insomnia is good.

But yeah, back to waking up.

I opened my eyes and everything felt bright, and blurry. My eyes hurt like hell and I closed them and groaned. Of course in the room were my two loyal guard dogs-my brothers. Hearing my groan, they jumped making me open my eyes wondering what the fuck was going on around me. As soon as my bi-colored eyes met their brown and blue ones they had yelled.

"ITAMI'S AWAKE!"

I had groaned and muttered a 'Shut the fuck up' to which they loudly whooped in joy. I'm going to compare the waking up to a hangover. Loud noises, bright colors, and movement piss you off and hurt. So my brothers whooping, the bright sterile white room, and me being hugged to death didn't exactly put me in a good mood.

"Space!" I screeched, using this body's voice for the first time in forever. My voice cracked making me sound hilarious, Jack and Chris laughed. I scowled at them while coughing a bit.

"It's good to see Itami's already mean, even after waking up from a coma!" laughed Chris. I growled, but didn't say anything in fear of sounding like that girl from Roots, the one with the voice that made everyone in my class cringe. Even me. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, think those voices that are high and must be fake, only this girls was real. And I swear it was almost able to break glass.

"Fuck the coma, I'm fine." I muttered, Jack laughed at my voice. I had turned from a deep, seductive womanly voice, to a cracking little female child's voice. Damn it.

"You sound like you did when you were nine Itami!" cooed Chris, receiving a glare of death from me.

"Shut up, I'm sixteen damn it, not nine!" I squeaked, I covered my mouth, eyes wide.

"Fuck." Chris guffawed at my voice and language.

"Nine year olds don't say fuck Tami." he teased. It was nice how after a coma they would still joke around and tease me. Although I'd miss it had they not of done so.

"Shut the hell up!" I snapped as someone cleared their throat. We all turned to see my doctor in the door. He sighed.

"Its good to see you're so energetic when you first wake up, Miss Duncan." he muttered.

"What's the verdict?" I asked as I looked at all the places I had been injured. Sadly, since my body back in the Narutoverse had been cut off from this one these wounds weren't healed by the medical Ninjutsu. I still had stitches in my chest over where my heart should have been, however I think my heart was on the wrong side of my chest. I remember reading that in the doctor's report when I was in my comatose state of just standing there, watching my body.

"Mirror." I demanded after a moment of silence. Jack handed me one and I frowned. I was white, almost, my eyes had a ring around them, but it was less apparent, the scars around my left eye were there, but they were more shown due to my new pale skin. My piercings were taken out, making the holes all over my face look strange.

"Jashin…" I muttered under my breath, then remembered I was no longer in the Narutoverse. I had to get back to saying God again.

"Miss Duncan, I would like to speak to you." called a woman's voice. Jack and Chris scowled in unison and they glared like the woman was Satan. This woman was actually gorgeous, dark chocolate hair in a neat ponytail, hazel eyes, and pale skin. Then I noticed she was in business mode, pencil skirt and blouse made me think she was a lawyer or something.

"You two can go." she ordered Jack and Chris when they didn't budge. They growled at her but moved. She walked over and peered down at me. I scowled at her, instantly not liking her.

"Who the hell are you?" I snapped. She blinked, then her eyes narrowed.

"I'm your social worker Miss Duncan, Nancy Koffman." She stuck her hand out. I looked to my limb, finding it hard to lift. I lifted it and shook hands with her after a moment.

"Itami Duncan as you know, now, let me rephrase my question, what the hell do you want?" I replied bitterly.

"There has been a call from your school nurse saying that you have shown signs of abuse." she stated. I felt oddly calm as she said this, not so panicky like usual when someone mentioned abuse. Perhaps, my time in the Narutoverse had matured me?

….

Fuck no; I'm still a little sarcastic crazy bitch.

"And?" I asked.

"And the nurse says you have a history of depression." Nancy turned her papers over to show me the charges.

"I'm perfectly fine." I responded.

"Then show me your arms." I scowled and did as told. She smirked upon seeing the scars crisscrossing up my arms.

"You're sick, smirking at self abuse." I muttered.

"Its my job to help little girls like you." she replied.

"I don't need shit from you; right now all you are to me is an uptight bitch who's meddling in my business. Now get the hell out of my room, and while you're at it, the pole shoved up your ass!" She merely narrowed her eyes at me.

"Also found in your room when searched," she held up what looked to be a warrant, "Legally of course, were many weapons and blood stains, not to mention all that blood was yours. We also found that you have an unhealthy obsession with a cartoon-"

"Anime bitch!" I barked.

"Anime," she corrected with an uncaring look, " that involves sharp objects, death, swearing, and blood. We believe that you're not in a good home, Miss Duncan, and we wish to take you away from your parents and put you in foster care." I blinked at this woman.

"You're telling a sixteen year old girl who just got out of a coma less than an hour ago all this? I think you're mental, get away and leave me alone. I'm perfectly happy." I snapped.

"Then why do you have cuts on your arm?" she countered calmly.

"They're old, scars, not cuts. I'm happy; now get the fuck out of here!" I yelled, a machine connected to me started beeping.

"Miss Koffman I'm afraid you'll have to leave, Miss Duncan shouldn't get her blood pressure that high yet." explained a nurse from the door. Nancy scowled at me, but then told me she'd be back and she left in a huff.

"I hate that woman with a passion, she's making Chris and I move out." muttered Jack as he and Chris came back in.

"And we really like our house!" added Chris.

"Why not ask mom and dad to move out, then the three of us can stay together?" I suggested, they looked at me curiously, "You guys are nineteen, turning twenty, I'm sixteen, going on seventeen soon enough. It can work, besides moms always wanted to move into a new house. Speaking of parents…. where are they?" I questioned.

"Dad didn't visit, mom stayed home with him. We've been here every day as much as possible." replied Jack.

I figured my parents didn't visit the shitheads they were….

A month later my parents moved out leaving Jack Chris and I together in our house. I kept it clean and I cooked, they went to their jobs and I went to school. It was easy enough, and our parents still paid the bills so it was still easy.

I guess life would go on as normal. With me never seeing the Akatsuki again, and I could keep my Jutsu abilities a secret, I wasn't that advanced anyway.

Little did I know, my adventures with the Akatsuki weren't over. And Deidara, wasn't going to let me go without a fight.

* * *

**AN**

**And thus, Insomnia ended, only for Wide Awake to begin. Go read the sequel; I think I was on something when I wrote the first chapter though. I think someone drugged me. Because it was a bit more….crack-ish than my usual writing. **

**Hm…. are you all sad to see Insomnia end? I am, I had more ideas. But I already had my thought train on this track and I think everyone was tied of the random non storyline chapters.**

**Total Review Count as of this post-238 (I was shocked, I never thought I'd reach 10!)**

**Follower Count as of this post-79(Again, shocked, I was hoping for like 10, not 70! I appreciate that you all liked my story)**

**Favorite Count as of this post-72(Aww, you guys liked my story? I never thought I'd get 5 people to like it!)**

**Total Views as of this post-16,537 (Amazing, I hope all you readers enjoyed this. You guys in the future too.**

**I would like to thank the three who would Beta for me, of course now I'm doing it all on my own. I would like to thank all you who read. I would like to thank all of you lovely reviewers. If you enjoyed Insomnia that much, go read Wide Awake. if not, at least you won't get the notifications that I updated anymore.**

**Created June 23****rd****, 2012, and was finished January 13****th****, 2013. It was my first fic, and it took like 6-7 months to finish. I'm sad to see it end.**

**Good bye for now.**


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